URI:
       [HN Gopher] What not to write on your security clearance form (1...
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       What not to write on your security clearance form (1988)
        
       Author : wizardforhire
       Score  : 456 points
       Date   : 2026-02-21 17:08 UTC (18 hours ago)
        
  HTML web link (milk.com)
  TEXT w3m dump (milk.com)
        
       | alwa wrote:
       | (1988) and real cute
       | 
       | From an OG computer scientist [0], about antics at age 12 which
       | might strike some of us as familiar :)
       | 
       | [0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Les_Earnest
        
         | emmelaich wrote:
         | The personal web page is entertaining.
         | 
         | https://web.archive.org/web/20231021140222/https://web.stanf...
        
       | sargun wrote:
       | I find it a little funny how much the government spends on these
       | dead end investigations. We never will know precisely how much is
       | wasted.
        
         | abeppu wrote:
         | I mean, in this case the government spent thousands because
         | there was a small amount of circumstantial evidence that
         | suggested there was clandestine communication happening during
         | wartime.
         | 
         | What was the immediate government spending on Japanese American
         | internment, where there was no evidence or investigation into
         | the ~120k people whose lives were disrupted, and who were
         | transported, housed, fed and guarded for multiple years?
         | 
         | Arguably, spending thousands on investigating something
         | specific is less wasteful than the alternatives the government
         | was willing to take at that time.
        
         | basilgohar wrote:
         | It's not funny. It's a dag-gone jobs program. ICE, TSA, and
         | more throw away billions to effect little but a heavy burden on
         | the population. These organizations, FBI and other law
         | enforcement included, invent crises and problems so as to
         | secure even more funding.
         | 
         | Maybe the individual investigator in the story is excepted
         | considering it seems he took it seriously, perhaps, but yes, a
         | lot of money is intentionally thrown into these organizations
         | for security theater, jobs programs, and padding the pockets of
         | political friends and cronies.
         | 
         | What we should be worried about is how many legitimate threats
         | fly under the radar because time and again these organizations
         | have been proven to be highly ineffective at actually
         | preventing what their charters mandate, but they can appear to
         | be very visibly effective by incarcerating thousands of
         | innocent people.
        
         | topkai22 wrote:
         | Investigating a cryptographic key found near a major military
         | installation during war time doesn't strike me as a waste of
         | money. We have the full information about the outcome, but the
         | San Diego FBI field office did not.
         | 
         | I think that's what makes this story so funny- the FBI was
         | acting appropriately and rationally, but ended up with a
         | relatively absurd result.
        
           | dehrmann wrote:
           | If a Japanese spy knew this would happen, they could waste
           | enormous amounts of time by spreading unused keys around San
           | Diego.
        
         | tverbeure wrote:
         | And then when something big happens, everybody and their dog
         | starts screaming "how could this happen?!?"
         | 
         | You can't have it both ways... (not specifically directed at
         | you.)
        
           | Nasrudith wrote:
           | I think it is quite reasonable to tell incompetents that they
           | can't just cover their ass by claiming "you can't demand
           | perfection".
           | 
           | These are the same kind of incompetents who want the pay but
           | not the responsibility of the position. Who think that
           | building a giant haystack of all of the data is the solution
           | so they can illogically claim to have prevented something
           | that because you had that needle in there somewhere! Except
           | you never found it in time because you were too busy building
           | the tower of Babel out of hay! It is just utterly idiotic
           | double-think. (Cough, cough NSA!)
        
       | bombcar wrote:
       | It's obvious the real spy was Bob.
        
         | jll29 wrote:
         | Bob AKA "Satoshi-san".
        
       | lacoolj wrote:
       | Wonder if author name is Alice
        
         | ctoth wrote:
         | "Kid, have you rehabilitated yourself?"
        
           | lesuorac wrote:
           | For context: Alice's Restaurant Massacree [1].
           | 
           | [1]: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WaKIX6oaSLs
        
       | breadchris wrote:
       | I got distracted by how incredible owning milk.com is
        
         | jsheard wrote:
         | https://milk.com/value/
         | 
         | Also the server header is "lactoserv"
        
           | tverbeure wrote:
           | The FAQ is super informative!
           | 
           | https://milk.com/faq/
        
             | Dansvidania wrote:
             | Is it allowed to lol on HN?
        
               | WalterGR wrote:
               | You are welcome to lol silently.
        
               | Dansvidania wrote:
               | Nah
        
               | DonHopkins wrote:
               | No, you can only go low: "MOO!"
        
             | hypercube33 wrote:
             | I miss the Grate book of MOO lore from Usenet
        
           | simantel wrote:
           | purple.com had a similar page for years, and eventually the
           | mattress company rolled up with a dumptruck load of cash
        
           | connorgurney wrote:
           | Which is a real server, no less!
           | 
           | https://github.com/danfuzz/lactoserv
        
           | tokenless wrote:
           | Err. Id consider a 1m+ offer if I were him. With explosion of
           | tlds and AI making the domain name less relevant (you ask AI
           | and click its link) it will probably depreciate and better to
           | grab $$$ and invest elsewhere.
        
         | qup wrote:
         | He used to (maybe still does) have a page where he talked about
         | turning down millions of dollars for it.
        
           | pousada wrote:
           | See the link above. He's willing to part with it for 10
           | million
        
         | alansaber wrote:
         | Almost as cool as owning ai.com!!
        
           | jsheard wrote:
           | Buying AI.com for an AI company just shows they have more
           | money than imagination. Many such cases during the dot-com
           | era (pets.com, mp3.com).
           | 
           | The real flex would be for AI.com to have nothing to do with
           | AI whatsoever.
        
             | gundmc wrote:
             | Not on the same scale as AI, but my first ever AirBnB host
             | still owns harley.com. He made his money writing "The
             | Yellow Pages of the Internet" physical books and had turned
             | down numerous lucrative offers from Harley Davidson.
             | 
             | Really fascinating and quirky guy as you can probably infer
             | from the site.
        
               | jsheard wrote:
               | Similarly, the guy who owned nissan.com never sold out
               | and continues to spite Nissan Motors even in death.
               | 
               | https://nissan.com/
               | 
               | You've got to actually use a trademark-adjacent domain in
               | good faith though, otherwise you might get the rug pulled
               | from under you.
               | 
               | https://www.roadandtrack.com/news/a69634055/75-million-
               | dolla...
        
             | zarzavat wrote:
             | > The real flex would be for AI.com to have nothing to do
             | with AI whatsoever
             | 
             | Apple Intelligence?
        
               | amarant wrote:
               | Apple Inc. was right there man.
               | 
               | Talk about missing the low hanging fruit!
               | 
               | ;)
        
             | DonHopkins wrote:
             | Artificial Insemination is a massive global industrial SaaS
             | (Sperm as as Service), one of the few sectors that can
             | literally make its customers' clients come and deliver!
        
           | c22 wrote:
           | How do you feel about x.com?
        
             | DonHopkins wrote:
             | Never heard of it. Do you mean twitter.com?
        
         | Hamuko wrote:
         | In an incredible coincidence, I just yesterday listened to a
         | podcast episode that discussed milk.com.
         | 
         | https://www.npr.org/2025/09/03/nx-s1-5526903/domain-name-val...
        
       | boothby wrote:
       | Boggles the mind that the advice from the security was to _lie on
       | the form_ , which is almost certainly a felony.
        
         | alansaber wrote:
         | Probably thought he was joking around. This was for a summer
         | internship after all.
        
         | roughly wrote:
         | The thing that is missed in most efforts to replace people with
         | machines is how often the people that are being replaced are on
         | the fly fixing the system the machine is intended to
         | crystallize and automate.
        
           | Someone1234 wrote:
           | This is what a lot of people miss about "AI will replace"
           | programmers narrative.
           | 
           | When converting from a traditional process to an electronic
           | one, half my job is twisting people's arms and playing mind
           | reader trying to determine what they ACTUALLY do day-to-day
           | instead of the hypothetical offical, documented, process.
           | 
           | Some of the workarounds that people do instead of updating
           | the process are damn right unhinged.
        
             | iugtmkbdfil834 wrote:
             | Without going into details, just recently I was able to get
             | pretty decent business requirements from group manager, but
             | it seems the only reason I was able to get somewhat decent
             | idea of what they actually do, is because there was certain
             | level of trust since we worked together previously so there
             | was no need to bs one another. I openly stated what I
             | thought is doable and he seemed to understand that I need
             | to know actual use cases.
             | 
             | edit: Otoh, my boss is kinda giving up on automating
             | another group's process, because he seems to be getting a
             | lot of 'it depends' answers.
        
               | Someone1234 wrote:
               | I will say, in a lot of cases, they aren't BS-ing/lying
               | with _intent_. Just the general way their minds work
               | seemingly isn 't compatible with the very idea of laying
               | out the process in its entirety (inc. the
               | warts/hacks/workarounds).
               | 
               | So what ultimately winds up happening is, you'll roll out
               | the process according to the official way, and then it is
               | drip-drip-drip of changes as you find out the real-world
               | version.
        
           | Dansvidania wrote:
           | This is exactly why "automation" hasn't taken _that_ many
           | jobs. It is a totally overlooked detail. Thanks for the
           | reminder.
        
             | threatofrain wrote:
             | Some industrial shipping docks can be managed by a very
             | small crew. I think this is the metaphor for what's going
             | to happen to a lot of industries.
        
               | htrp wrote:
               | dark factory
        
               | reactordev wrote:
               | I'm not so sure. They operate that way because of scale
               | and economy (and tech that enables that). In a future
               | where all industries are optimized in such way, very
               | little will actually flow as most won't have the money to
               | buy goods, thus factories won't make goods, thus shippers
               | won't ship, and the global economy grinds to a halt.
               | 
               | We need waste as much as we need investment. The trick is
               | to find the value in between. I think the sweet spot will
               | be augmenting work, not necessarily optimizing it.
        
               | foxglacier wrote:
               | That doesn't seem to make sense. As things get cheaper
               | and wages go down too because there's an oversupply of
               | labor, those poorer people can still afford those cheaper
               | things.
        
               | reactordev wrote:
               | Things never get cheaper. The only things that have
               | reduced in cost is tech related because we kept making
               | advancements as per Moore's law.
               | 
               | The two things that matter, housing and food, are way way
               | up.
        
               | animal_spirits wrote:
               | Luxuries are cheap and necessities are expensive
        
           | Aurornis wrote:
           | > how often the people that are being replaced are on the fly
           | fixing the system the machine is intended to crystallize and
           | automate.
           | 
           | If the system is broken, this is actually a good thing.
           | 
           | I have some experience doing automation work in small and
           | large scale factories. When automating manufacturing work you
           | almost always discover some flaws in the product or process
           | that humans have been covering up as part of their job. These
           | problems surface during the automation phase and get
           | prioritized for fixes.
           | 
           | You might think you could accomplish the same thing by
           | directly asking the people doing the work what could be
           | improved, but in my experience they either don't notice it
           | any more because it's part of their job or, in extreme cases,
           | they like that the inefficiency exists because they think it
           | provides extra job security.
        
             | roughly wrote:
             | > If the system is broken, this is actually a good thing.
             | 
             | And the system is always broken. Reality is messy, systems
             | are rigid, there always has to be a permissive layer
             | somewhere in the interface.
        
               | yowayb wrote:
               | So many websites and apps are still broken in so many
               | little ways. Maybe broken isn't the right word. But all
               | kinds of annoyances and breaches still happen all the
               | time.
               | 
               | I generally don't complain/review, and just learn the
               | workarounds/shortcuts, but I very much welcome the
               | increased (albeit perhaps less skilled) workforce
               | leverage, because I think in a year or so we'll see
               | steady improvements accumulating.
        
             | michaelt wrote:
             | _> If the system is broken, this is actually a good thing._
             | 
             | Sometimes when you reveal extensive noncompliance with dumb
             | requirements, the requirements get less dumb. Other times,
             | the organisation doubles down and starts punishing the
             | noncompliance.
             | 
             | My employer's official security policies say everyone
             | should kensington lock their laptop to their desk at all
             | times, even though the office is behind two guards and
             | three security doors. Nobody does. But if someone made a
             | load of noise about it, there's no guarantee they'd remove
             | the widely ignored rule; they might instead start enforcing
             | it.
        
           | ctoth wrote:
           | And then, how often they aren't[0]
           | 
           | [0]: "Computer Says No"
           | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0YGZPycMEU
        
         | u1hcw9nx wrote:
         | If it is plausible that you did not remember, it's not a
         | felony. Something that happened for 12-years old is easy to
         | forget.
         | 
         | There is nothing morally wrong in felonies like this, just
         | don't get caught.
        
           | mcmcmc wrote:
           | > There is nothing morally wrong in felonies like this, just
           | don't get caught.
           | 
           | Highly debatable. If you believe in a categorical imperative
           | that to intentionally deceive another person is wrong, then
           | lying by omission is still an immoral act. A Christian might
           | also interpret the words of Jesus "Render to Caesar what is
           | Caesar's" as an imperative to comply fully with the law of
           | the land.
        
             | pluralfossum wrote:
             | Mala in se vs. mala prohibita.
             | 
             | I don't think it's all that debatable to say that deceiving
             | people is categorically wrong, nor is it to say that it's
             | immoral not to follow the laws of the land -- both are
             | obviously untrue as absolute statements.
             | 
             | For extreme examples, would it be immoral to lie to the
             | Gestapo about harboring Jews? Were people illegally helping
             | slaves escape the American South being immoral?
        
               | mcmcmc wrote:
               | You are completely missing the point of the categorical
               | imperative. There are no exceptions, no loopholes, no
               | utilitarian calculus.
               | 
               | > For extreme examples, would it be immoral to lie to the
               | Gestapo about harboring Jews? Were people illegally
               | helping slaves escape the American South being immoral?
               | 
               | If you believe in that categorical imperative, then yes.
               | I'm not saying I believe in it or that Kantian philosophy
               | is the only correct one. There are endless belief systems
               | and philosophical schools of thought that can be used to
               | answer that question, and they will have different
               | answers for different reasons.
        
               | HWR_14 wrote:
               | > would it be immoral to lie to the Gestapo about
               | harboring Jews?
               | 
               | This is something that first/second year philosophy
               | students do debate.
        
               | defrost wrote:
               | Minnosoteans are currently hiding, feeding, and supplying
               | undocumented community members.
               | 
               | They are not debating it.
        
             | kelnos wrote:
             | There are many laws in many jurisdictions that are immoral.
             | Following those laws would be an immoral act. Legality and
             | morality should be aligned, but in the real world they
             | often aren't.
             | 
             | If Jesus (assuming he existed, even, regardless of any sort
             | of divinity) tells us that following the law is always the
             | moral thing to do, then he was wrong.
        
             | raverbashing wrote:
             | Cool, you do that then. I bet you'll get a gold star at the
             | end of the year
        
           | bigfatkitten wrote:
           | Not remembering is one thing, but if they find out during the
           | vetting process, and then they ask you about it, your answers
           | had better be forthright.
        
         | master_crab wrote:
         | It's also odd, because usually, as long as you don't lie on
         | your security form, you'll get your clearance.
         | 
         | The coverup is always worse than the original sin.
        
           | DennisP wrote:
           | And there's good reason for that. Someone with a clearance
           | once explained to me that they're mainly worried about things
           | that make you vulnerable to exploitation by foreign agents.
           | If you're covering something up, that's something they can
           | use to blackmail you.
           | 
           | But maybe if the thing you're revealing is "I myself was
           | suspected to be a spy," that changes the calculus a bit.
        
         | cs02rm0 wrote:
         | The travel forms to visit the US ask if people have ever been
         | involved in espionage, at least they did, I'm not aware that
         | it's changed.
         | 
         | You can guarantee the many people who work for intelligence
         | agencies of US allies aren't admitting to that when they travel
         | to the US.
         | 
         | It's all a bit of a game.
        
           | pbhjpbhj wrote:
           | But they're required by laws of their own country to lie,
           | presumably. There are certainly game-like aspects.
        
           | dcminter wrote:
           | "Do you seek to engage in or have you ever engaged in
           | terrorist activities, espionage, sabotage, or genocide?"
           | 
           | Quite.
        
           | binarymax wrote:
           | The reasoning for some of these questions is that if you are
           | caught, it's sometimes easier to charge you with fraud (lying
           | on the form) than the actual thing (such as espionage).
        
             | 4gotunameagain wrote:
             | Wouldn't they need the be able to prove that you are a spy
             | in order to argue that you lied ? In which case who cares
             | about the form ?
        
               | stnikolauswagne wrote:
               | Thats why I presume its asking about previous
               | engagements, if they catch someone they suspect of
               | espionage, dig into their background and find proof of
               | previous activity they have a clear fraud charge without
               | having to prove their suspicions about current
               | activities.
        
               | xboxnolifes wrote:
               | Proving you worked for a spy agency is far easier than
               | proving you _did spying_ in actuality. Assuming you didn
               | 't get caught in the act.
        
               | bigfatkitten wrote:
               | The fact you worked for an intelligence agency doesn't
               | mean you were an intelligence officer. You could've been
               | a cleaner, or an executive assistant, or maybe you were
               | working as a software developer on the payroll system.
        
               | toast0 wrote:
               | There's often also some arbitrage on standard of proof or
               | statutes of limitation or jurisdiction.
               | 
               | Maybe to deport you for espionage requires a jury trial,
               | but to revoke status for misleading answers on an
               | immigration form is administrative and so is deportation
               | for lack of status.
               | 
               | I seem to recall some extraordinary cases where
               | untruthful answers on immigration forms were used to
               | justify denaturalization.
        
           | swiftcoder wrote:
           | Those forms also ask if you've ever been a member of a
           | communist party, and basically everyone over 35 in all of
           | Eastern Europe would have to check that one (they don't, if
           | they want to enter the US)
        
             | selkin wrote:
             | Every statement in the above comment is wrong:
             | 
             | People born in the 90s wouldn't have a chance to be old
             | enough to belong to any group other than a preschool before
             | the collapse of the Soviet and Soviet aligned regimes.
             | 
             | For those who were adults before 1990, while they may have
             | been party members for reasons unrelated to political
             | ideology, it wasn't as common: in the late 80s, only ~10%
             | of adults in Warsaw pact countries were communist party
             | members. Far from "everyone".
             | 
             | And even if you check that in the DS-160 visa application
             | form, you are allowed to add an explanation. Consular visa
             | officers are very well familiar with the political
             | situation at the countries they are stationed in, and can
             | grant visa even if the box is checked.
        
             | midtake wrote:
             | Do you mean everyone who was 18 by 1989, or 55 today?
        
               | swiftcoder wrote:
               | Yes, my sense of the passage of time is a little off.
               | I've met folks who were members of the FDJ in East
               | Germany as young teens, but as you say, they are 50-ish
               | now.
        
         | pbhjpbhj wrote:
         | He lied originally, kinda.
         | 
         | He made a cypher with a school friend, which cypher was handed
         | by a stranger to the FBI and investigated. That one possible
         | outcome of the investigation might be 'the subject is a
         | Japanese spy' doesn't mean _he_ was suspected of that; not by
         | the FBI at least.
         | 
         | If he said, "I made a cypher in school", then likely the form
         | would have been considered fine? Presumably his record clearly
         | showed the FBI incident, so I'm surprised that lying in the
         | second form didn't cause concern sufficient to question him.
         | But there you go; I've never had any associations with TLAs,
         | what would I know.
        
         | appplication wrote:
         | When I joined the Air Force, they helped us fill out the
         | clearance forms. One question was related to marijuana use in
         | the past. The NCO helping us told us "if you have used it
         | before, be honest. They will know." But then followed it up
         | with "remember: you used it less than 5 times and you didn't
         | like it".
        
           | mgerdts wrote:
           | I remember similar advice.
           | 
           | In Navy boot camp the person reviewing my security clearance
           | application (which was filled out weeks before) was very
           | helpful in the way he asked the critical question. "It says
           | here you tried marijuana once. Is that true?"
        
             | bell-cot wrote:
             | "Well, some guy I didn't know very well _said_ it was
             | marijuana - but how would I know? All it seemed to do was
             | make my eyes water, and give me a headache... "
        
         | bityard wrote:
         | It's easy to pass judgement on a decision like that when so far
         | removed from the context where/when it took place.
         | 
         | It's likely that answering yes to that question meant an
         | instant rejection for the clearance AND summer job. The FBI was
         | probably not inclined to spend money looking into such an
         | obviously trivial matter just so some kid could get some work
         | experience. "Sorry, try the McDonald's down the street."
         | 
         | That security officer did the author an incredibly big favor.
        
         | xenocratus wrote:
         | I mean, his name is Les Earnest, they should expect it.
        
         | tomrod wrote:
         | He wasn't investigated though. His missing glasses and hobby
         | were. Once they found out the owner was not worth
         | investigation, it was dropped.
        
         | midtake wrote:
         | He was TWELVE at the time the "investigation" happened, and he
         | clearly wasn't engaged as a suspect. His mother was.
         | 
         | He had no obligation to put that on security clearance form
         | whatsoever.
        
         | ErigmolCt wrote:
         | Clearance forms are weird in that they're not just legal
         | documents, they're inputs into an investigative process
        
         | scoodah wrote:
         | In this particular case I think it has more to do with the
         | times than anything else. Discovering the records of that
         | investigation from when he was 12 in the 40's would have likely
         | been a massive undertaking if not impossible. The investigator
         | likely recognized this and just had him remove it.
         | 
         | These days I don't think that happens with digital records.
         | Omitting that incident would almost certainly cause more issues
         | than not now as I'm sure they'd turn up in the investigation.
         | If not included on your sf86 you'd likely be grilled about it.
         | 
         | Investigators are usually reasonable in my experience. If you
         | omitted it because you earnestly forgot because it happened
         | when you were 12, they'd likely understand if you were
         | forthcoming about it during your interview. Investigators are
         | human though so it depends on how they feel.
         | 
         | What they really care about is stuff to try to purposely hide.
        
         | HWR_14 wrote:
         | The advice was from the 1949-1952 period. I imagine that was
         | the prevailing wisdom developed getting literal former Nazis
         | jobs in our space program, etc.
        
         | nashashmi wrote:
         | The word investigated is a lot bigger than some simple inquiry
         | someone makes. Investigation is actually a complete tear down
         | of someone's past in a search for clues. He was not
         | investigated. He played a part in an investigation of a lost
         | cipher. His cipher was investigated.
        
       | denotational wrote:
       | > On another occasion much later, I learned by chance that
       | putting certain provocative information on a security clearance
       | form can greatly speed up the clearance process. But that is
       | another story.
       | 
       | Presumably this is the famous (?) story of him listing his race
       | as "mongrel" whenever asked?
        
         | nosrepa wrote:
         | From elsewhere in this thread:
         | 
         | https://yarchive.net/risks/mongrel.html
        
       | forinti wrote:
       | > On another occasion much later, I learned by chance that
       | putting certain provocative information on a security clearance
       | form can greatly speed up the clearance process. But that is
       | another story.
       | 
       | I have to know this now...
        
         | kyusan0 wrote:
         | Here you go: https://yarchive.net/risks/mongrel.html
        
           | p1anecrazy wrote:
           | What a wholesome guy. Thanks for the read
        
       | avodonosov wrote:
       | This story was written in another text also and discussed on HN.
       | It was longer and the author also described how later in life he
       | introduced a standard to wear hemlets on bicycle competitions.
       | (Sorry, I dont have a link handy)
        
       | svag wrote:
       | Not related to this story, but this one https://milk.com/true-
       | stories/stupid_computer_users.txt was hilarious :)
        
       | moron4hire wrote:
       | I have a somewhat similar story involving the death of an
       | extremely elderly neighbor by an accident on his farm, and the
       | suspicion by the state police that I at 12 years old had murdered
       | him, based solely on someone saying they thought they saw me
       | messing with his mailbox from a car that was similar to the one
       | parked in our driveway. The mailbox which stood directly next to
       | ours at the end of an easily walkable driveway. So yes, Mr.
       | SF-86, I had once been investigated for a felony. Oh, you're only
       | supposed to tell the truth if the truth will help the government
       | catch to a bad guy? Very impressive system, sir. Top notch.
        
         | dgacmu wrote:
         | The modern SF-86 only asks about charged, not investigated (and
         | AFAIR, that was the case also 20 years ago).
         | 
         | (And arrested, but presumably you were not).
        
       | acehilm123456 wrote:
       | When I was 15, a couple months short of 16, I ended up working as
       | a student intern at a research facility. They required a
       | clearance to badge into and out of the building, but I never
       | worked on anything that directly needed the clearance.
       | 
       | So I was given the form to fill in and read the question: Since
       | you were 16, or in the last 7 seven years, have you ever smoked
       | weed?
       | 
       | So I thought, I guess I better think back to when I was 8!
        
       | TrackerFF wrote:
       | The fact is that even for (NATO) top secret security clearances,
       | there are lots of people that lie through their teeth, and
       | receive the clearance. Obviously on things that aren't in any
       | records. The big ones being alcohol use, drug use, personal
       | finances, foreign partners. Some are more forgiving than others,
       | though.
       | 
       | The military is unfortunately chock full of functional
       | alcoholics. As long as they don't get caught drunk on the job,
       | seen partying too much, DIU, or admit anything to their doctor,
       | they keep getting renewed their clearance.
       | 
       | Interestingly enough, if there's even the smallest suspicious
       | that you smoke weed, they'll put you through the wringer. I've
       | seen more people lose their clearance for pissing hot, than those
       | with six figure debts or drinking 5 days a week.
        
         | moron4hire wrote:
         | > I've seen more people lose their clearance for pissing hot
         | 
         | When? In the 90s? Biggest pothead I know has had a clearance
         | since '05. For my own form, I straight up admitted I had done
         | it and did not regret it.
        
           | hinkley wrote:
           | It was always explained to me as a mix between, 'are you
           | going to fuck things up by being in an altered state' and 'is
           | someone going to blackmail you to make you into a double
           | agent?'
           | 
           | If your family and wife know you sometimes sleep with men,
           | that's not necessarily a problem. If nobody knows, that's a
           | problem. Similarly if your wife and boss don't know you owe
           | $50,000 to a bookie or your coke dealer, that's a liability.
           | 
           | Actually would be sort of interesting if your boss _did_ know
           | you owed a bookie $50k and they found a way to use that to
           | make you into a triple agent...
        
             | ikr678 wrote:
             | >It was always explained to me as a mix between, 'are you
             | going to fuck things up by being in an altered state' and
             | 'is someone going to blackmail you to make you into a
             | double agent?'
             | 
             | You are missing the foremost consideration - how
             | critical/specialised/irreplacable is this person in their
             | role and can we just ignore the positive test instead.
             | 
             | If you are good enough at what you do and management like
             | you positive tests dont seem to matter if you make the
             | right noises about it being a one off, retesting clean etc.
        
             | tucnak wrote:
             | > Actually would be sort of interesting if your boss did
             | know you owed a bookie $50k and they found a way to use
             | that to make you into a triple agent...
             | 
             | Welcome to counterintelligence you'll like it here
        
         | heraldgeezer wrote:
         | Are you saying weed should be punished less, or the others
         | should be punished like weed?
        
           | drdaeman wrote:
           | I think they're saying that there is an inconsistency, but
           | they don't suggest anything, leaving any conclusions to the
           | reader.
           | 
           | It's just "things aren't right", and not "here's what we need
           | to do..."
        
             | heraldgeezer wrote:
             | Yes and I am saying I am tired of those boring cop-out
             | "analysis". Yes, having a social science degree, it was
             | full of those. Make solutions instead. Anyone can
             | """analyze""".
        
           | c22 wrote:
           | I'm not sure security clearance is really about punishing
           | people.
        
             | heraldgeezer wrote:
             | You know exactly what I mean. Chased after, investigated?
        
               | b112 wrote:
               | Who are you replying to? When I click 'parent' on your
               | post, the poster said nothing about his opinion on what
               | should be done, only what he's seen.
        
               | c22 wrote:
               | I think I'm less confident that I know what you mean now
               | than I was before.
        
         | lesuorac wrote:
         | > The military is unfortunately chock full of functional
         | alcoholics. As long as they don't get caught drunk on the job,
         | seen partying too much, DIU, or admit anything to their doctor,
         | they keep getting renewed their clearance.
         | 
         | Well yeah. If it's not affecting your job then what's it
         | matter? If your a closet alcoholic then sure that's something
         | the Russians could hold over you.
         | 
         | There's millions of people with clearances; that's impossible
         | to staff at below market wages and also above average moral(?)
         | standards.
        
           | Aurornis wrote:
           | > If it's not affecting your job then what's it matter? If
           | your a closet alcoholic then sure that's something the
           | Russians could hold over you
           | 
           | Alcohol lowers inhibitions and alters decision making.
           | Drinking a lot of alcohol more so than casual drinking.
           | Frequently drinking a lot of alcohol has a very high area
           | under the curve of poor decision making.
           | 
           | Functional alcoholism can come with delusions of sobriety
           | where the person believes they're not too drunk despite being
           | heavily impaired.
           | 
           | So they'll do things like have a few (or ten) drinks before
           | checking their email. It makes them a better target for
           | everything like fishing attacks, as one example.
           | 
           | It's not just about enemies holding it against you.
        
             | vscode-rest wrote:
             | Gross misunderstanding of the threat model.
             | 
             | Phishing is not the problem here. Your laptop isn't getting
             | SIPR emails with links to fake login screens.
        
               | wongarsu wrote:
               | Being drunk at the bar/club/social event and telling that
               | very interested lady a bit too much is probably the
               | better example
               | 
               | Still not as bad as being susceptible to blackmail or
               | bribes
        
               | vscode-rest wrote:
               | That is not correlated to Alcoholism. The "extremely hot
               | spy" problem is essentially unsolved.
        
               | tbihl wrote:
               | I got ads from the army about "extremely hot spy" over
               | Valentines day weekend
        
               | Aurornis wrote:
               | I think you're misunderstanding the threat model for why
               | security clearance cares about impaired judgment of your
               | off time, too. There's more to these people's lives than
               | when they're on the clock (figuratively speaking).
               | Getting compromised anywhere is a problem.
        
           | yowayb wrote:
           | And, within high-trust societies (eg Japan, Korea, Vietnam)
           | getting wasted lubricates social bonds in the workplace. I've
           | met successful functional alcoholics. Seriously, they
           | actually function and make lots of money. They're also fun to
           | be around as long as you're not working for them.
        
         | albedoa wrote:
         | > Interestingly enough, if there's even the smallest suspicious
         | that you smoke weed, they'll put you through the wringer. I've
         | seen more people lose their clearance for pissing hot, than
         | those with six figure debts or drinking 5 days a week.
         | 
         | I have to defer to you here since it sounds like my experience
         | is more limited, but this is not my understanding at all. The
         | agencies care a lot about financial indiscretions, as those
         | applicants are most susceptible to compromise. And indeed, if
         | you look at the lists of denials and appeals, you might think
         | that money issues are the only reason anyone is ever denied.
         | 
         |  _Lying_ about _having smoked_ weed is another story.
        
           | hinkley wrote:
           | How do you really ever know if someone you hired for psyops
           | is telling you the truth?
        
             | ganoushoreilly wrote:
             | It gets weirder when they train you how to evade polygraphs
             | as part of your role.. only to have you take one for your
             | re investigation and to be asked "have you ever tried to
             | evade a polygraph" or something along those lines. Of
             | course you're not in a SCIF and your training or having
             | been exposed to that training may in fact be classified.
             | Quite the pickle..
        
           | yowayb wrote:
           | First job out of college, I spilled my guts on form 86, ~40
           | joints, ~10 ecstasy. Denied clearance the entire 3 years.
           | This was 2002.
        
             | albedoa wrote:
             | Were you sponsored by a company? I feel like there is a
             | difference in diligence and expeditiousness when you have a
             | sponsor that is familiar to the OMP/DoD.
             | 
             | And yeah, I said something like "I smoked a couple times in
             | college but not anymore". This was about two years after
             | college. I wonder if quantifying your joints raised a flag
             | lol.
        
         | ErigmolCt wrote:
         | A lot of that comes down to what's objectively verifiable vs
         | what's discretionary, and also what's culturally normalized
         | inside the org.
        
         | HWR_14 wrote:
         | The Vietnam War and all the soldiers on drugs encouraged a very
         | strict drug policy.
        
           | yowayb wrote:
           | Makes complete sense. I've spent some time around Southeast
           | Asia and met plenty of vets that discovered many psychoactive
           | substances who also happen to be anti-war.
        
         | hinkley wrote:
         | When gift buying for minimalist friends it's common to offer
         | gifts of perishable items or experiences like tickets. So that
         | a week from now the gift has been cleared from their domicile.
         | 
         | It also seems like a fairly smart way to do graft. If you're
         | bribing someone and they drink up or smoke all the evidence
         | then they can't prove how much or how often you bribed them.
         | Which would make alcoholics a good target especially if you can
         | get your hands on fancy liquor.
        
           | yowayb wrote:
           | I doubt anyone in an official capacity is using such
           | techniques, but I can tell you this is common in sales. A lot
           | of people in management with control of budget have at least
           | one of just a handful of human weaknesses.
        
         | DonHopkins wrote:
         | The US Military is currently led by a dysfunctional alcoholic
         | totally unqualified DUI hire.
        
         | 0xTJ wrote:
         | I was chatting with an old classmate at a homecoming a few
         | months ago, and he mentioned that, during the polygraph top get
         | Canadian Top Secret clearance for a co-op job, he had to say
         | how many drinks he had each week. Being a university student,
         | it got brushed aside, but the answer was considered to be
         | alcoholism-level.
        
           | Terr_ wrote:
           | In a weird way, that's almost a positive sign, if you view
           | the security-clearance process as mostly being about quickly
           | clearing away secrets that could be used for blackmail down
           | the line, when the person has more authority and more to
           | lose.
        
             | Terr_ wrote:
             | P.S.: Further musing: There's a system-design tension
             | between granting access to people that are "perfect" versus
             | "flawed in ways we are aware of and can manage." Where a
             | process ought to land on that spectrum depends on certain
             | assumptions about baseline applicant quality, an estimate
             | of the organization's accuracy at [false/true]
             | [negatives/positives], and the impacts.
             | 
             | If you auto-reject the people who _admit_ to something sub-
             | criminal like cheating on their spouse, that means no
             | applicant will ever admit to it, so you 'll end up with
             | _more_ people hid it. In the long run, that means a higher
             | proportion of employees who have something an adversary can
             | use for blackmail, and the blackmail is more-effective
             | because the repercussions are large.
        
           | ghostpepper wrote:
           | You can get co-op/internship that requires a Top Secret
           | clearance?
        
             | seabass-labrax wrote:
             | There are co-operatives in manufacturing which would need
             | their staff to be security-cleared in order to win
             | government contacts (such as assembling weapons). Perhaps
             | this is what parent is referring to. Co-ops aren't just for
             | groceries :)
        
               | xav0989 wrote:
               | In the Canadian university lingo, co-op refers to a
               | (usually paid) internship that you complete as part of
               | your degree. You usually have a couple co-op
               | terms/semesters along with your traditional terms. For
               | example, you may start your degree with two semesters of
               | classes, then a semester of co-op, then one of classes,
               | then another two co-ops, more classes, etc. until you
               | complete the degree requirements. Degrees with a co-op
               | requirement usually will make mention of it (e.g.
               | Software Engineering with co-op).
        
         | yowayb wrote:
         | omg this was my experience. I figured there was no point lying
         | officially, so I listed exactly how many times I smoked weed
         | and took mdma. I was banished to the unclear side for my entire
         | 3 years there. Meanwhile the head of IT was a raging alcoholic.
         | I even wrote their very first J2EE webapp, which required me to
         | be escorted to the cleared side anytime someone needed help
         | with my code. I couldn't touch the keyboards! I was giving vi
         | instructions verbally lol
        
         | kevin_thibedeau wrote:
         | The US government uses data brokers and the banking industry to
         | continuously monitor cleared people. Eventually they will find
         | any problematic patterns of life.
        
           | samus wrote:
           | The point is that they seem to worry more about being a weed
           | user than being an alcoholic.
        
         | Nasrudith wrote:
         | The punchline is that automatic firing for 'vulnerabilities'
         | itself creates the very blackmail vulnerabilities they are
         | trying to avoid.
        
       | gwbas1c wrote:
       | I ran a dial-up BBS in the late 1990s. One summer a few of my
       | loyal users suddenly stopped calling.
       | 
       | About a year later I learned that one of my users hacked an
       | airport. At the time a few of my users would set their computers
       | to dial random numbers and find modems answering. One of the
       | numbers was a very strange system with no password. The story I
       | heard was that they didn't know what the system was, because it
       | had no identifying information.
       | https://www.cnet.com/tech/services-and-software/doj-charges-...
        
         | Aurornis wrote:
         | > the hacker left behind a calling card by changing the system
         | identification name to "Jester."
         | 
         | > The attack on the branch of an unidentified major pharmacy
         | chain occurred on four separate occasions from January through
         | March of last year. The hacker acquired the names, contact
         | information, and prescriptions for the pharmacy's customers
         | 
         | I think the story you heard was a watered down version of what
         | they were doing. You can't do things like exfiltrate data from
         | a pharmacy database and not know what the system you're
         | attacking is for.
        
       | grepfru_it wrote:
       | In case you want to read about the proactive information speeding
       | up your security clearance: https://catless.ncl.ac.uk/Risks/6/50
        
         | neilv wrote:
         | This sounds a bit like Feynman. I wonder whether it was more
         | the style of the time.
        
         | ink_13 wrote:
         | Thanks for posting. That's actually a much more interesting
         | story.
        
         | aliceryhl wrote:
         | Thank you. I was wondering about that.
        
         | SpaceNoodled wrote:
         | Clever, but I'd worry that they'd actually find some way to
         | nail me.
        
         | yowayb wrote:
         | I appreciate the fun, but he's clearly messing with them or has
         | Asperger's. You can definitely reduce hoops by knowing the
         | bins, which they helped him with.
        
         | kamyarg wrote:
         | This has been one of the best articles I have read.
         | 
         | Thank you for the digging that up and sharing.
        
       | dang wrote:
       | Related. Others?
       | 
       |  _What not to write on your security clearance form (1988)_ -
       | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34437937 - Jan 2023 (545
       | comments)
       | 
       |  _What Not To Write On Your Security Clearance Form_ -
       | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1444653 - June 2010 (98
       | comments)
        
       | godelski wrote:
       | Security clearances are probably a really good example of
       | Goodhart's Law.
       | 
       | One reason for all these questions is really to determine if
       | someone can be blackmailed, and thus a security risk. (Big reason
       | they look at your financials and why debt can cause you to lose
       | clearance) But the letter of the law trumps the spirit. A common
       | lie these days is about weed usage. You may get or entirely
       | rejected for having smoked in the past even if you don't today
       | (e.g. you tried it once in college but didn't like it). So
       | everyone lies and it creates a system where people are even told
       | to and encouraged to lie, like in TFA. The irony being that this
       | is exactly what creates the situation for blackmail! Now you can
       | get blackmailed for having that past thing cause you to lose your
       | job as well as lying on your clearance form.
       | 
       | Honestly it seems smarter to let the skeletons out of the closet.
       | Spill your secrets to the gov. Sure, maybe the gov can blackmail
       | you but a foreign government can't blackmail you for something
       | that the gov already knows. You can still have filters but the
       | dynamic really needs to change. Bureaucracy creates its own
       | downfall. To reference another comment, I'd rather a functional
       | alcoholic have a clearance _and_ the gov know about it than a
       | functional alcoholic have a security clearance and the gov not
       | know about it (or pretend to not know). We 've somehow turned
       | clearance checks into security risks. What an idiotic thing to do
        
         | OneDeuxTriSeiGo wrote:
         | Yeah on my SF86 I listed all the dumb shit I did and the
         | investigator called obviously kind of concerned but receptive.
         | We went through each one and his key point was "do you
         | understand you can't do that" and as long as you answered yes,
         | documented it on the form ahead of time, and it was obvious you
         | weren't lying through your teeth then pretty much anything you
         | did that wasn't in the last 3-5 years was pretty much
         | immediately forgiven.
         | 
         | Some security officers are really touchy on these kinds of
         | things and will tell you to exclude or lie but investigators
         | pretty much never care what you did as long as it is obvious
         | you don't plan on doing those types of things again or being an
         | active problem.
         | 
         | They just want it for their records and they want you to be an
         | open book such that they don't feel you are concealing anything
         | problematic.
        
           | godelski wrote:
           | > Some security officers are really touchy on these kinds of
           | things and will tell you to exclude or lie
           | 
           | But this is the problem. It is good that the investigators
           | don't care but the security officers are the one you meet and
           | talk with. They set the tone. Them doing this gives people
           | the impression that investigators will care. And frankly,
           | some do. I don't think we can dismiss the security officer's
           | role here.
        
         | vscode-rest wrote:
         | This information is highly outdated. You can say any number of
         | things on your SF86 and still get cleared. This is indeed the
         | point.
        
           | godelski wrote:
           | The weed example is something that happened to a friend of
           | mine. That's within the last 5 years...
           | 
           | In fact, I remember Comey saying something about it too. But
           | the rule as I know it is not having smoked in the last 3
           | years. While that is probably fine for most people, it does
           | seem to have a bias when you're considering people fresh out
           | of college. Considering that college is frequently where
           | people try weed, along with a lot of other things (not even
           | drugs, just new activities, dress styles, and so on) as they
           | find themselves.
        
             | vscode-rest wrote:
             | That is not the rule by any means. 6 months is a rule of
             | thumb.
             | 
             | What exactly happened to your friend? It is not in the
             | domain of possibility that they were explicitly informed
             | "you are being rejected for X reason", so everything they
             | do say is pure speculation. Probably, they lied about
             | something and got caught.
        
         | hinata08 wrote:
         | imagine curing alcoholics and drug dependant ppl who work for
         | you ?
         | 
         | I'm really surprised at how they would rather ignore or silence
         | all and report that they is strictly no problem among their
         | pool of employees, to say they have the best employees and good
         | KPIs
         | 
         | It doesn't look like a winning strategy indeed.
         | 
         | I myself refused to do government jobs as the table in which
         | you had to list foreigners in your friend list was just so
         | small. They prefer you to say you don't know nobody.
         | 
         | Also yeah, I agree with you. These forms are straight out of
         | the 1950s when more liberal habits have been coming since the
         | 60s. And we're straight up declining anyone who is outspoken
         | about his habits while he knows the true boundaries of the
         | laws.
         | 
         | The government is just selecting applicants who do the sharia
         | or some straight up vague "you have to be a good guy" menaces
         | that completely opens them to blackmail
        
           | godelski wrote:
           | > imagine curing alcoholics and drug dependant ppl who work
           | for you ?
           | 
           | To complicate this further I think people don't recognize how
           | people can start their jobs without problems and then gain
           | them. These are stressful jobs (and with low pay) so that
           | itself is a common gateway to a drinking problem. But there's
           | also very mundane ways too. A large number of heroine and
           | fentanyl addicts had their addictions begin through use of
           | legal medication. The problem is we have a culture that
           | pretends addiction is a choice and that the only to become
           | addicted is through poor decisions and that to kick an
           | addiction just requires " _really_ wanting to stop ". But
           | that's not really consistent with the definition of
           | addiction...
           | 
           | It seems like a poor strategy for high security topics, like
           | you say. If anything, I want these people to have _zero_ fear
           | of opening up about their addictions. Be it gained
           | unintentionally or through bad decisions. Reason being that
           | 1) it reduces the risk of blackmail and 2) giving them a
           | pathway to help also reduces their chance of blackmail. We
           | don 't even need to mention the fact that these are people
           | and should be treated with kindness, we have entirely selfish
           | reasons to be selfless.                 > I myself refused to
           | do government jobs as the table in which you had to list
           | foreigners in your friend list was just so small.
           | 
           | I always found that odd myself. Do these people know what the
           | demographics of a typical American University are these days?
           | If you don't have a decent list of foreign nationals then
           | you're either 1) a social recluse or 2) in a cultural bubble,
           | and probably not the kind that we want people with this kind
           | of authority to have... But I think they could resolve some
           | of this by clarifying what level of contact they mean. Is it
           | someone you sit next to in class and talk to frequently? Or
           | do they not count if you don't talk with them outside class
           | or study groups? Last time I looked at the forum it seems
           | like they want you to just list anyone you ever talked to.
           | 
           | Personally I've avoided getting a clearance because I just
           | don't see the value. It is a lot of work to put together,
           | forces you to be more quiet about what you work on, means you
           | need to be more careful/vigilant in every day things and
           | especially when traveling, and all for what? Low pay and not
           | even that cool of work? I mean if it was working on alien
           | technologies and cool sci-fi shit, sign me up! But the
           | reality is that most of the work isn't very exciting. I'd
           | rather have more freedom, more pay, and work on more
           | interesting things. Maybe their work can have more purpose
           | and more impact, but I am also not convinced that's true for
           | the majority of things you need clearance for (even as a
           | person in STEM).
        
         | commandersaki wrote:
         | It seems to me that if you lie and get the clearance, it is
         | better than being honest and getting NACKed. Maybe morally
         | dubious, but there's financial incentive and motivation for
         | having a clearance.
        
           | godelski wrote:
           | I think you need to reread my comment... you seem to have
           | misunderstandings...
        
         | scoodah wrote:
         | You shouldn't be denied for smoking weed in college and
         | disclosing it. I had no issues with that. The other thing is
         | you can appeal a denial of your clearance if you can
         | demonstrate the issue is not an issue. If you truly did only
         | smoke weed in college and get denied due to that, you could
         | appeal and make your case that your weed use is not ongoing,
         | ended in college, and not an issue in your personal life. It's
         | not guaranteed to be a successful appeal, of course, but the
         | process does exist.
         | 
         | The bigger problem is when people fib about their usage. Saying
         | you only used it in college when you've used it more recently
         | is something people do fairly often, and seemingly are
         | encouraged to fib about.
        
       | sam_lowry_ wrote:
       | I once worked at a top financial firm which had regular
       | background checks from Pinkerton (yeah, that very agency from the
       | books and with bad US history).
       | 
       | They sent me a questionnaire asking to fill personal details in a
       | Word file while their email signature said not to disclose
       | personal details over email.
       | 
       | Security clearance business is rotten to the core.
        
       | rdtsc wrote:
       | > When I handed the form in to the security officer, he scanned
       | it quickly, looked me over slowly, then said, ``Explain this''--
       | pointing at the FBI question. I described what had happened. He
       | got very agitated, picked up my form, tore it in pieces, and
       | threw it in the waste basket.
       | 
       | > He then got out a blank form and handed it to me, saying
       | ``Here, fill it out again and don't mention that. If you do, I'll
       | make sure that you never get a security clearance.''
       | 
       | It's important to "see like the government" when dealing with the
       | government (pun on "seeing like a bank" by
       | https://www.bitsaboutmoney.com/archive/seeing-like-a-bank/ if
       | anyone didn't catch the reference).
       | 
       | Everything fits into bins and categories with checkmarks and
       | such. As an entity it has no "bin" for "investigated as Japanese
       | spy as a joke when was a child". So you have to pick the closest
       | bin that matches. However, that doesn't mean the same government
       | later won't turn around also punish you for not picking the right
       | "bin". Not "realizing" that it's its own fault for not having
       | enough categories i.e. bins for you to pick. And, some may argue,
       | that's a feature not a bug...
        
         | phreeza wrote:
         | Not sure if you were maybe joking, but Seeing like a Bank is
         | itself a pun on the famous book "Seeing like a state"!
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seeing_Like_a_State
         | 
         | So you've come almost full circle!
        
           | rdtsc wrote:
           | It is the full circle! patio11 refers to that explicitly in
           | the blog. But most people here probably saw and remember
           | Pat's blog more than the book.
        
             | jglamine wrote:
             | The book is very famous! I would guess more people have
             | heard of it than read that specific BAM post.
        
               | bigiain wrote:
               | You're almost certainly right. But I bet the tables tip
               | distinctly the other way if you're talking about HN
               | readers instead of everybody. So I'd guess you're both
               | right.
        
         | notatoad wrote:
         | the challenge is always determining what the "bins" are.
         | 
         | maybe the government has no bin for "investegated by the FBI
         | for a silly and innocuous reason". but maybe they do, and lying
         | about it slots you into the bin for "lied on their security
         | clearance form".
        
           | Frost1x wrote:
           | In the security space you're encouraged to be as transparent
           | as possible. Most modern forms have ample space to write in
           | detailed explanations.
           | 
           | I have some silly not nearly as interesting infractions and I
           | wrote them out in detail explaining, without any issue in
           | processing background checks. It usually is something that's
           | asked about in an in person interview at that point.
        
         | ErigmolCt wrote:
         | The danger isn't just being risky, it's being anomalous
        
         | shakna wrote:
         | And then, over with AGSVA, they just do interviews. Every
         | candidate gets one, and they absolutely do bring up all the
         | random crap that happens to various people as kids. And ask why
         | it wasn't on your form.
        
         | raverbashing wrote:
         | Exactly this
         | 
         | People of a more autistic orientation here seem to think this
         | is a no-no when in fact it's quite the opposite
         | 
         | The note was investigated. Not the person.
        
         | john01dav wrote:
         | In response to the seeing like a bank article, one thing which
         | can make this a lot better is to use asynchronous ticketing or
         | messaging systems instead of phone trees.
         | 
         | At my bank, I can just send a message in the app, even when
         | it's closed, about whatever I want. Then, when the bank opens,
         | someone reads it, and then either handles it, or transfers it.
         | Then, if its transferreed, that person either handles it or
         | forwards again.
         | 
         | The same triaging of basic issues exists, the same tiers
         | described in the article, but the user interfece is wildly
         | superior. I take 1 minute to write what I need to write, and
         | then a few business hours later, its solved. I don't need to
         | waste my time on hold. I don't need to be instantly available
         | for an undetermined period for a call back. I don't need to
         | explain the same issue repeatedly. If I'm asked a question, I
         | can answer it, and the answer is then attached to the full log
         | that every escalation or transfer has full access to.
         | 
         | This is so much better that I refuse to do business with most
         | businesses that don't offer something like this. I was
         | extremely pissed when a data broker leaked my SSN and I was
         | forced to deal with such institutions to clean up that mess.
        
       | Wowfunhappy wrote:
       | Just how little space was there on the form? I think I would have
       | tried something like:
       | 
       | "When I was 12 years old, I exchanged encrypted messages with
       | friends. The FBI found a code and briefly thought I was a spy."
       | 
       | Or, if there was even less space:
       | 
       | "As child, used encryption for fun. FBI found code &
       | investigated."
       | 
       | I would want to avoid lying at all costs, even if a superior
       | instructed me to. Who knows what could happen.
        
       | est31 wrote:
       | Note the date, it's April 1 1988.
        
       | acomjean wrote:
       | This happened to my mom when being interviewed when coming over
       | here in the 60s. During verbal questioning she said something
       | like "of course". The government agent turned deep red and asked
       | her if she understood the question (English isn't her first
       | language and she hadn't). She's been here since.
       | 
       | I kind of get that the agent is looking out for the applicant in
       | this story. You have no idea what's going to happen when you do a
       | security clearance thing and they ask about this and that. How
       | serious is the wrong answer.
       | 
       | Excepting my favorite question which something like "have you
       | ever tried to topple the government?"
       | 
       | The system is messed up when screening for honesty encourages
       | people to lie.
        
         | ErigmolCt wrote:
         | I suspect that's why experienced officers sometimes intervene
         | like in the OP's story
        
       | bjt12345 wrote:
       | I admire people who don't lie about past drug use on their
       | clearance forms. Sure, it might delay their clearance, but I
       | still admire them.
       | 
       | The core social problem with drug addiction and alcoholicism is
       | this concept of telling people what you think they want to hear
       | from you, not telling them the truth.
        
       | runamuck wrote:
       | "the most frequently occurring letters in typical English text
       | are e-t-a-o-n-r-i." But "Wheel of Fortune" told me to guess R-N-
       | S-T-L-E!
        
         | toast0 wrote:
         | It's not contradictory. Wheel of Fortune only gives you one
         | vowel for free, e is the most common, same as here.
         | 
         | Wheel of Fortune gives you several consonants, order matters
         | less, and both lists share n r and t.
        
       | ErigmolCt wrote:
       | So something uncomfortable about clearance processes: they're not
       | purely about truth, they're about interpretable truth
        
       | cheese_van wrote:
       | It might have been 2002, can't remember, when they upgraded the
       | e-QIP software for the security check form.
       | 
       | I was doing my mandatory update coincidental with the roll-out
       | and when I got to the question, "mother a US citizen" I had to
       | check the "no" box and the immediate pop-up was "date of first
       | contact?" which actually got me thinking along existential lines
       | for a moment.
        
       | NooneAtAll3 wrote:
       | honestly, had he written the reason as "I devised new encryption
       | scheme at 12" he might have gotten promoted rather than dissuaded
       | 
       | it's like insurance claim - precise wording matters more than
       | facts
        
       | rkagerer wrote:
       | This one's fun too: https://milk.com/wall-o-
       | shame/two_dollars.html
        
       | tokenless wrote:
       | They just needed to polygraph him
       | 
       | ;-)
        
       | keepamovin wrote:
       | At least we now know that everyone working in classified programs
       | is above reproach and cleaner than clean. It's a good thing too,
       | because working without accountability in secret would definitely
       | be abused, but thankfully that's not the case because the people
       | hired are too pure and good.
       | 
       | It's also a very good filter for high openness and creativity,
       | ensuring that the most sensitive works attracts the most
       | brilliant creative geniuses. Truly these nations know how to
       | develop their advantages in the best way.
        
       | piskov wrote:
       | > it was in 1943, just after citizens of Japanese descent had
       | been forced off their property and taken away to concentration
       | camps
       | 
       | Anyone else did that during the war or only horrible Hitler and
       | humane Americans?
       | 
       | Come think of it, I wonder what would happen to all the
       | immigrants if full-on war ensues.
        
         | whattheheckheck wrote:
         | People are cruel. Good people arent cruel enough to overpower
         | the cruel people
        
         | defrost wrote:
         | Like the USofA, the British interned "enemy nationals" - this
         | policy extended across the Commonwealth including Canada,
         | Australia, India, and elsewhere.                 During the
         | Second World War, the British government interned several
         | different groups of people, including German, Austrian and
         | Italian nationals.            However, following Nazi Germany's
         | military successes in France, Belgium and the Netherlands in
         | the spring and summer of 1940, there was increasing concern
         | that 'enemy aliens' in Britain would form a ' fifth column '.
         | These concerns were amplified by the British press. As a result
         | of this growing fear, the British government interned
         | approximately 27,000 'enemy aliens', including those assessed
         | as low risk, supposedly in the interests of national security.
         | Those interned were predominantly men between the ages of 16
         | and 60, but 4000 women and children were also interned.
         | 
         | ~ https://www.theholocaustexplained.org/resistance-
         | responses-c...
         | 
         | In Australia: https://www.naa.gov.au/explore-
         | collection/immigration-and-ci...
         | 
         | In India: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_Years_in_Tibet
         | 
         |  _Technically Heinrich Harrer was not a civilian as he held the
         | "honorary" rank of a Nazi sergeant in the SS, kind of an early
         | PR stunt rank given due to his status as a world famous
         | mountaineer .. still it points to the internment of Germans and
         | Austrians in India and references an interesting book_
        
         | xyzelement wrote:
         | I think the motivation and experience of those camps were quite
         | different
        
           | piskov wrote:
           | Yeah, let's call that involuntary race-based detention a
           | retreat.
        
       | themafia wrote:
       | > It apparently didn't occur to them that if I were a real
       | Japanese spy, I might have brought the glasses with me from
       | headquarters.
       | 
       | It occurred to them. They like to test their apparatus out
       | anyways.
        
       | bandrami wrote:
       | My favorite part of re-upping every five years is the
       | investigator indignantly asking why I spent multiple years in all
       | these different countries and showing him the government orders
       | that posted me there. There's really a "left hand has no idea
       | what the right hand is doing" aspect to this process.
        
       | kazinator wrote:
       | I've read this before but this time what stands out is:
       | 
       | > (To me, $8 represented 40 round trips to the beach by
       | streetcar, or 80 admission fees to the movies.)
       | 
       | Glasses being a ripoff scam goes back that far?!
        
       | rurban wrote:
       | All the articles at https://milk.com/wall-o-shame/ are a
       | goldmine. I prefer the one of a student called ''Missile'' Seitz
       | buying a missile for nothing, and then didn't have to pay income
       | taxes for several years
        
         | ikjasdlk2234 wrote:
         | This story is under the title "Government Surplus" and is
         | indeed quite a tale (and on point for MIT students).
         | 
         | https://milk.com/wall-o-shame/government_surplus.html
        
       | nektro wrote:
       | body { max-width: 60em; margin: auto; }
        
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