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>> 1 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-11 05:53 ID:f/L9pUvS
I think this board should have a thread where users can post whatever random thoughts related to personal issues or life are on their mind.
Anything that doesn't need its own thread or fit into an existing thread can go here.
>> 2 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-11 19:16 ID:f/L9pUvS
Learning to drive taught me about how to act in general.
On the road I was being overly cautious with regards to other drivers. I was scared that I was getting in their way, or that they wouldn't see me. Pretty much I wasn't asserting myself enough. In driving, it's dangerous not to assert yourself.
Now I've gotten more used to acting in an assertive way. "This is what I'm doing. Now it's up to the both of us to compromise. You'll make room for me. I'll make room for you."
Not in an egocentric way. It's about not being overly meek.
>> 3 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-12 18:49 ID:0rIZDUzZ
Below's a long rant that I didn't really want to put in its own thread but wanted to write out somewhere. Impeccable timing on making this thread.
I almost forgot how incredibly miserable I get when I'm freshly heartbroken. This is the most depressed I've been in a long time, and with the dogshit year I've had that's saying a lot. I'm feeling like I'll never find someone who is willing to try to build something healthy with me, like I'm doomed to keep thinking I've found "the one" just to watch them self-sabotage and nuke everything.
I'm feeling sick of being the "good guy" of the situation, the one that on some really objective level didn't do something cruel to the other person or fuck something up. I'm tired of dealing with people too obscenely selfish to make any amount of reasonable, healthy compromise for a relationship. I'm feeling vaguely disgusted with myself for continuing to believe I have any ability in judging character in human beings when I keep obviously judging the person I let the closest to me so poorly.
I'm struck by the feeling that I've already had and lost the person that should have been my life partner years ago, and that I'll genuinely never find someone else I have even a fraction of a chance of truly being with.
It's upsetting and frustrating because even as I write this out, I know that I don't fully believe any of it. I'm just venting my angsty bs because this is the thread to do it in. I know from experience that I'm not going to wallow eternally--with enough time I'll be convinced that I learned a good lesson from this, and regain enough morale to try again with someone else. But after consecutively getting hurt very deeply again and again over the years, the inevitability of my recovery isn't something optimistic to me anymore. I have this feeling of impending doom or dread about it. It's starting to feel less like development or progress and more like the setup to more of the same fucked up cosmic punishment, like as soon as my liver finishes regrowing a crow's going to come down and eat it again.
I'm sick of suffering like this. I feel like I can say this more objectively than I could at any earlier point in my life, I am deserving of a safe and healthy relationship. I don't deserve to be this miserable. And again, it upsets me to no end that the common denominator to this misery is that I seem to keep choosing the wrong kinds of people, thinking they're the right kinds.
I'm too tired to keep typing bullshit. I think I'll eat junk food and watch a movie..
>> 4 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-12 21:02 ID:uGgYBrWH
>>3
Wish I had some kind of advice, but even from an outside perspective it seems like a really difficult situation. So I'll just say I'm sorry to hear you're going through that.
It does sound like you're a little bit hard on yourself, though, for choosing the "wrong kinds of people". Someone's negative traits can take time to appear or become noticeable. They can sometimes be detected early on, but not always. So maybe don't be so hard on yourself..
>> 5 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-16 01:09 ID:f/L9pUvS
Listening to Sonic soundtrack for fun and started thinking about the overall events and timeline of my life, what happened between the time when I was a child playing that game and now. All that time seems to have gone by so quickly, as if it happened in one night or was a dream. I'm just trying to "process" my life, that it is in fact the life that I lived and I am currently in the continuation of it ... Because thinking back on life from an overhead perspective makes me feel like it was someone else's life and I was just somehow thrust into their place.
>> 6 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-18 02:14 ID:a04C7UBQ
I can’t overcome this headache I’ve had for 8 hours now. Maybe I should take some Tylenol.
>> 7 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-21 04:23 ID:f/L9pUvS
I'm barely living my life.
>> 8 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-22 04:35 ID:Xt3knra/
Continuation of >>7
I'm starting to realize how normal it is for people to have friends, to go out and do things with them, and to be happy in general. And how different my life is from that currently.
Of course I always knew that most people have those things, but it didn't really "sink in" until recently. I mean I had a hard time realizing just how good life can be. All of this time I had become used to being alone, being bored with nowhere to go..but that's not how life is supposed to be.
Never really had those things in life, but hopefully I will someday soon. I can see things turning around.
>> 9 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-26 00:09 ID:f/L9pUvS
Update on >>2
In addition to what I said about driving lessons giving me confidence, I also noticed improvements from exercising. Just doing push ups every day is enough. Feeling physically strong makes the world and other people seem less intimidating.
Also I've been watching a lot of comedy TV shows that are realistic (not sitcoms). TV shows that portray real life situations including the awkward ones. Some of the shows are actually just recordings of real life interactions. I think those shows have given me confidence too. They allowed me to realize that awkwardness is just a part of life for everyone. Despite that awkwardness, we have to be assertive and things work themselves out, situations become more comfortable naturally. These TV shows also allowed me to see that in many social situations there's nothing to worry about. If someone's in your way, just say, "Excuse me." You're not bothering them or getting in their way. They're not going to get angry at you. If you're not sure what to order at a restaurant, just ask, "What do you recommend?". You're not wasting their time or being awkward or annoying.
Once you are assertive or socially relaxed even once, you'll gain confidence. You'll realize that there's no reason to be afraid and that it feels good to be comfortable around others. Then the next social interaction will be easier and there will even be incentive to be easygoing around others.
>> 10 Anonymous Counsellor 2025-12-26 01:13 ID:meWWIo6m
I feel existential dread and despair at the world we’re all living in. A deep feeling of hopelessness and worthlessness which I’ve rationalized through bookworm intellectualism. The more I look at the world, the more despair at it moving in directions I dislike but I’m too weak and feeble to do anything about it. I wish I had an outlet I can dump these feelings into so I’m not carrying them around like a dead weight. I just can’t think of what to do.
>> 11 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-01 21:02 ID:0rIZDUzZ
>>10
Art's great for that. If you're good enough at it you can even get paid for venting your frustrations about the world.
>> 12 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-06 00:23 ID:AkV20aAA
I always have this feeling that I’m not good enough. If someone else puts in 10 hours of effort into something, I have to do 15. I have to work x10 harder. This obsession creeps into every aspect of life. I don’t play vidya because I don’t feel like I’m good at them. I don’t think I can say I’m into anime unless I’ve watched every major release between 1978-2008. Even hobbies have become a curse.
>>11
I’m not very artistic. I’ve thought about making gore art or collaged and distorted photos of trash and gore. I don’t know where I’d put it or how to do it. Guess it’s just an outlet for my anger.
>> 13 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-07 01:18 ID:OVdroJCz
I've developed this weird mental fear of ICE kidnapping me for being autistic someday.I know it might never happen hopefully but my brain is admittedly f'd up for allowing my mind to think such nonsense. Maybe I'm scared,i don't know,but hopefully things will get better.
>> 14 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-08 03:45 ID:0rIZDUzZ
>>13
At the risk of worsening any of your concerns that really isn't that far off from any of the other bullshit they've been doing. I wouldn't write that off as nonsense. I'm hoping this all falls apart in the next couple years but I fear it's only going to get more absurdly extreme.
>> 15 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-08 17:11 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>12
I'm the same way. Very much the same way. Also I find myself trying to do things that aren't even that interesting to me because I feel like I have to prove to myself that I can do them.
>>14
I don't think you should have encouraged his fears. It is true that anything can happen, but we can't go through life thinking that way. In general we should assume that things will remain normal and steady. (Only less than one hundred years ago most of Germany was complacent with killing millions of their own population. Really anything can happen because people are easily indoctrinated. Still >>13, I don't think ICE will be kidnapping any autistic people. Ever.)
>> 16 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-14 18:21 ID:Sy0lDDYz
Thinking about how most people who died recently are divisive and how divided we are, I miss when internet drama wasn't about political "Right versus left" bullshit, and was more about some whiny guy on a forum having "dumb" tastes or something. Nowadays you have people taking shit more seriously, and most drama is usually "He voted for the bad guy" and results in wanting to start a digital civil war of sorts.
Can't we just go back to just bitching about music or something instead?
>> 17 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-16 13:27 ID:OVdroJCz
>>16
agreed. I saw(possibly fake to stir up shit) a post somewhere where someone was saying that people who didn't vote in 2024 because both sides were bad should go fuck themselves.It's damned if you do,damned if you don't. It's honestly exhausting and makes you feel hopeless. Maybe we should turn it off,put it in a locked drawer and play retro games from here on out.It's impossible to have clarity in an online world that wishes for you to be constantly stressed and have none.
captcha:deragh DERRAAGHH?! yeah i honestly feel that lol
>> 18 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-16 16:16 ID:+RM14v8Q
>>17
> >(possibly fake to stir up shit)Nah these are sincere. The logic is easy to follow: at the cost of the genocide in Gaza still being the same (which is mostly why people were abstaining, Harris would drop support for Israel), the US and rest of the world would very likely be a better place than it is currently. I'm having a really hard time thinking of what Harris would have done worse in any category.
>> 19 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-16 18:55 ID:+RM14v8Q
>>18
> >Harris would drop support for IsraelWould *NOT drop, critical typo there oops
>> 20 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-16 18:57 ID:OVdroJCz
>>18
Honestly,same here,and while i do get the sentiment,telling someone to go fuck themselves for a decision that they made possibly out of preservation for their mental health and to keep the peace with family still isnt okay. We also have to realize that some people just state things to get attention or just because they like to watch the world burn. And honestly,with Harris,I feel like at least ICE wouldn't be terrorizing everyone and we'd be comfortable living and breathing on earth right now.
>> 21 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-19 21:40 ID:Dr28R5Gn
I wish I had some skill I was good at but I've tried a bunch of stuff and I'm not really talented at anything and for somethings I'm way too old to become good enough at them to justify trying.
>> 22 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-19 22:37 ID:ipLMzdUG
Man, I'm really having difficulties with my childhood famly. I moved back in and I'm taking these new medications, and these are the worst people to be around for this if you want someone close to you. I feel like shit. I really need to get the fuck out of here
>> 23 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-19 22:44 ID:Sy0lDDYz
>>21
Same, I feel very talentless, mediocre at best.
>> 24 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-20 19:19 ID:Q97ehqvn
I've been recently remembering a lot of my shortcomings more often, which results in disliking myself too much that it would always take over my thoughts. I can't work together with others now despite already being incompetent, and I wish I could do something about it since I can only continue to exist.
>> 25 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-20 22:48 ID:+RM14v8Q
>>21
Please try to stick with something. I'm almost 40 and have been having fun learning Japanese. Do I regret not trying when I was a much younger weeb? God yes. But I'm learning now. The grind is what gets you "skill". "Talent" can be pared down to, like, Morrowind stats. A mage can grind acrobatics to be on par with a thief, but he does have to run around and jump way more than the thief ever did.
>> 26 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-21 00:16 ID:7BwdXhRG
>>25
I just wish there was something I'm good at. I don't mean like learning a language, but a skill or something I could do. I'm too fricken old to try any sport. I'm too old to pick up most instruments and get anywhere with them. I'm too old to join the air force. I have two left feet and can't dance, have no sense of depth, can't draw human faces no matter how hard I try, and I don't have the brain for anything math or programming related. I try hard to find a hobby that I can do reasonably well enough to be happy but I can't find one.
>> 27 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-21 00:19 ID:+RM14v8Q
>>26
> >too fricken oldHow old are you?
>> 28 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-21 09:03 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>26
I really don't think you're too old for these things. It might be harder to learn at an older age, but it's still definitely possible. It sounds more like you're intimidated by the idea of certain hobbies, so you don't give yourself a fair chance to stick with them and grind (like >>25 said). That's my guess. Could also be something that I struggle with personally: inconsistent motivation due to depression and loneliness.
Also have you considered hobbies that seem less intimidating (but also have room for growth and improvement) like photography and hiking?
>>24
You never know; there may be people on your team or in your life who are looking up to you, think their the one who is inferior. The way you think about yourself isn't necessarily the reality of "who you are". Knowing that might help. Also something that has helped me gain confidence in the past is light exercise. It's worth a shot.
Another practical idea to gain confidence is to try to accomplish small, achievable goals (small projects, goals for cooking, cleaning, diet, etc.)
I hope my unsolicited advice isn't received in the wrong way. I know this is a "venting" thread and not an advice thread, but I thought I would share these ideas in case they might help.
>> 29 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-23 21:00 ID:AiY1P1Q4
I've been going to a boxing gym for a week and I really don't know how to feel about it. Its expensive compared to a regular ass gym and years of being a net dwelling NEET have made me allergic to other homo sapiens. I stick out in all the bad ways. Guess I'll quit again and move onto the next hobby to try.
>> 30 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-24 02:41 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>29
Don't quit just because you think you stick out. If you keep to it I'm sure you'll become more comfortable there and won't feel self conscious
>> 31 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-25 21:48 ID:Sy0lDDYz
Snowed in with family, it's not like I've been going out much before either, but after shoveling the walkway and such with them, it just ended up buried in snow again.
Oh well, time to get comfy somehow.
>> 32 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-25 22:13 ID:OVdroJCz
....debating over things is tough for me. Maybe i shouldnt even try or have an opinion at all sometimes and just keep my mouth shut before something tragic happens to me.I've just never been cut out for it.
>> 33 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-26 08:29 ID:Q97ehqvn
>>28
> > The way you think about yourself isn't necessarily the reality of "who you are".Thank you for your intent of reaching out. Even though this part could be interpreted in a lot of ways, I think it's one important thing to think about. I've since then been trying to accomplishing tasks and enjoy hobbies at least a couple of times while I continue to live. I appreciate the advice.
>>29
I'm not sure if this could be applicable to you, but I think you shouldn't care too much how you're perceived and proceed at your own pace. You don't need to blend in too much since it's natural that people have different personalities and situations. Like >>30 said, it will take some effort and time to adjust somewhere. Unfortunately I can't come up with any specific advice how.
I've been in a slightly similar situation as well since lockdown restrictions were lifted years ago, especially because I've always been unusual. Effects still remain despite some adjustment which requires experience, but I pay less attention now to possible perceptions of how I prefer being private and alone. Somehow, I still get along with people by giving honest "positive" responses to their short interactions to me, with some light feeling.
>> 34 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-26 08:39 ID:Q97ehqvn
Actually, I specifically prefer being close to people who have some similarities to me such as interests. There've only been few chill (?) people I slightly got along with, and it looks like I still have no friends. Still not applicable to anyone, but I've accepted there's nothing I could do and I just enjoy other things myself at my free time.
>> 35 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-27 04:57 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>33
> >>The way you think about yourself isn't necessarily the reality of "who you are".
>Even though this part could be interpreted in a lot of ways, I think it's one important thing to think about.Now that I'm reading this again, I realize that I should rephrase it:
The way you think about yourself will determine how you are, for good or for bad. The "believe in yourself" slogan gets thrown around a lot and has lost its meaning, but I think it's true.
If someone believes that he has positive traits and potential, then he will embody that. And the reverse if he thinks negatively of himself.
This concept has a lot of applications. It can be used for some kind of goal you have. It can be used for self esteem and value. It can be used for feeling comfortable in a social situation.
>> 36 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-01-27 21:32 ID:Sy0lDDYz
Trying to be more social a bit this year, but it's a bit exhausting to be on voice calls and stuff like that, and occasionally being active on others' twitch streams.
>> 37 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-03 21:11 ID:Sy0lDDYz
I wonder if I should listen to more early post hardcore emo stuff.
>> 38 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-05 15:54 ID:Sy0lDDYz
I wonder if I should pursue romantic relationships with others now, I'm getting old and should find the right person sooner than later.
>> 39 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-13 21:47 ID:yuMQj38o
i have given up on all my new year's resolutions and am realizing just how much of a boring, utter failure of a man i am
>>38
marry me
>> 40 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-15 03:45 ID:2G3NWVV9
>>39
Everyone gives up on their new year's resolutions. Don't feel like you're a failure because of it.
Now I don't bother making resolutions like "I will do X for Y days". I just try to keep in mind "tangible" things that I can do and work on awareness so I can remember to do them. It has been surprisingly working a bit. I started by thinking, "I want to do this. This seems like a good path for me." And when I'm bored, instead of naturally going to YouTube or whatever, I try to remind myself, "You can do that thing you had been working on. You can have fun doing it anyway. Even if you feel lazy to do it now, or that it will be a lot of work, you know that it is enjoyable once you get started."
>> 41 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-17 19:29 ID:yuMQj38o
>>40
i've been working a lot but only out of boredom of any other pasttime
my main resolution was to stand up and stretch regularly, i even set a timer. But i just slouch for hours now. The more complex one was to socialize more, even if i'm anxious, but the people i know really suck and i am better off avoiding them. I think it's really healthy to go out and meet people, if only as a scare-tactic to get your life together once you see how sad they all are.
>> 42 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-18 00:03 ID:Sy0lDDYz
I need a more interesting life, my current one sucks.
>> 43 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-19 03:22 ID:4U5FMqCR
The thought I came here to post is slightly related to >>42 (which I'm just seeing now after I had the idea for what to post)
Since I was a teenager I had thought from time to time about the idea of how fiction or even imagination can take you to a completely different place. You can enter any "vibe" you want, even if it is not the vibe that your real life would give you. For example going to the beach can have a certain feeling. You can get that feeling by going to the beach in real life and looking at the ocean, or you can somewhat get it by listening, watching, reading, imagining something.
This is the same idea as escapism and "go to your happy place". It can be useful and beneficial when used in the right way at the right times. But it seems like if it's overused or used at the wrong times or periods in life, it can lead to someone ignoring his real life, which causes him to stop pursuing happiness in the real world, which promotes more escapism, and the cycle would go on.
Even though I had realized the idea and power of escaping to a fictional place and absorbing good feelings from there for a long time, I feel like I only recently fathomed the true extent of escapism and how much it can cause someone to feel (in a good way).
Personally my life at the moment is very boring and I'm glad to have some escapism through watching a good movie or whatever it is (this is rarely felt by browsing the internet and youtube. I was spending my time on low quality internet for a long time in order to distract myself, and I didn't get any of the good vibes that I could have gotten from escapism. It's a shame).
At times life can feel really nice and beautiful. It's like having the good feelings that can be felt through escapism, except they are being felt because of real life. This mostly happens when I just step away from the screen and spend time looking out the window, or I go to see nature.
I'll probably try to spend a lot of time on escaping into other people's lives (movie characters) for now to keep myself afloat. Soon some things are changing in my life, so I'll try to focus on real life more when that happens.
>> 44 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-19 20:17 ID:OaWNu7Ge
Sometimes by seeing someone, hearing their accent, or smelling them (sounds weird but I mean their perfume, shampoo, soap, etc.), I can get this picture in my head of what their life might be like.
A combination of these things and also the context gives me a clearer picture
And sometimes it can feel almost like I get to live as that person for a moment as I imagine their life, in a refreshing way.
>> 45 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-02-28 02:14 ID:r5Q/8j5z
I feel like I’m not working hard enough, that I’m not good enough, that I don’t know enough. I want to master this and master that and become good at X Y and Z. I look at the huge mountain I have to climb and feel so much despair. If I don’t excel at everything, people will treat me as if I’m worthless. And when it comes to the things I really love, I feel as if I can never reach the expert level others are at, like I’m eternally the guy with potential but can’t follow it up.
>> 46 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-01 17:53 ID:yuMQj38o
>>45
i am an expert at some things and trust me, nobody cares
I think your problems are from a different source entirely
>> 47 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-02 17:15 ID:HwzDEBhO
I have the same problem as >>45
It's been a problem for me for years. It's not like I think I have to be good at everything. But there are probably 6 or 7 things that I would really like to be good at and that I think I have potential in. For those things, I always feel like I'm not living up to my expectations for myself. I do try to get better at those things but I don't spend enough time doing that. And also I spread myself too thin by trying to chase 6 dreams at once instead of just one or two.
Like >>45 said, I feel like I have potential that I don't follow up. It feels like I'm just so close to getting good at something but I'm not there yet. But on the bright side I think that there is some truth in that...if I sit down, focus on one thing for a while, and really try, I think I can accomplish some of my goals.
I also go through cycles of productivity and feeling good about myself and then becoming unproductive, feeling bad, not wanting to do anything but doomscroll.
>>46
I'm not sure what the case is for >>45, but for me it's that I feel like I want to meet the expectations I have for myself. I have to get myself to where I think I should be (which is probably way too high. And even if I can achieve some of the things I want to, I have time.. there doesn't need to be some much pressure.)
>> 48 47 2026-03-02 17:26 ID:HwzDEBhO
Another thing
I think part of the reason why I developed this habit of putting too much pressure on myself is because I spent all of my childhood and teenage years doing nothing but playing video games so now I'm trying to compensate.
There's probably some other underlying reasons from childhood too but that's more complicated and I could t track down what they are
>> 49 47 2026-03-02 17:35 ID:1RhAZsDu
Part of it is also that I don't appreciate the qualities that I already have. So I always feel like there is more to accomplish.
Feeling like there is more to accomplish is not always a terrible thing. The pressure drives me to do more, but it shouldn't be the kind of pressure that makes me feel bad about myself. Instead it should be like, "Nice job, you're making progress."
Apologies for using 3 posts to write this.
>> 50 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-06 03:59 ID:f/L9pUvS
Related to the last few posts:
I'm realizing that once someone gains acceptance from others, he probably won't feel such a need to "prove himself" through skills and abilities.
When someone can communicate with others casually and he feels like he's a "part of" society in general--when he can go up to a stranger and talk to him with ease because that stranger is relatable just by being a fellow citizen--then he usually feels acceptance within society (this is the opposite of being an "incel" type of person. The "incel" always thinks of himself as the outsider and sees the rest of society as separate from himself. But the person I'm describing can feel part of society while still retaining and appreciating his own unique qualities.) Once someone feels acceptance, the feeling of needing to prove oneself might start to go away.
There might still be a feeling of wanting to live up to your potential or whatever, and that's a good thing. Just give yourself time, though, and don't get angry at yourself that you're not immediately an expert at whatever it is that you want to get good at.
Also know that you might have one true "passion" or "calling" in life that you should pursue, but in addition to that you may have potential in other things. Focus on your true passion. The other things--try to do them if you have time, but if you don't it's not really a big deal. (Even though I say this, I have a hard time internalizing it.)
This message is written to myself. I'm hoping that by writing it, it will help me to actually feel it.
>> 51 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-11 20:21 ID:Sy0lDDYz
I'm sneezing a bit today and have nasal problems... Spring has sprung.
>> 52 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-17 23:13 ID:Sy0lDDYz
I feel like my relationships just end up in a dead end these days... I'm not interesting for anyone.
>> 53 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-18 21:06 ID:xH1qwaRp
You know that joke in TV shows and cartoons where while a character is sleeping his bed gets put into a river or ocean as a prank? That happens to me a few times throughout the day on some days. I spend the entire day kind of detached and dissociated, in my own thoughts. The world seems fuzzy and I'm in a kind of half sleep. Then I can suddenly realize where I am. It's liking waking up suddenly in the middle of the street while cars are coming at me. The world feels way too big and exposed when I come into full awareness of my surroundings.
Also I have other related things, like sometimes feeling that everything seems strange and unfamiliar. Or thinking "What even is this" about life in general.
This might be DPDR but I don't think mine goes as far as to be an actual disorder level.
Wondering how many people here relate.
There's a lot more to talk about on this subject but not going to write more at the moment
>> 54 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-20 23:19 ID:Heaven
I look at those movies feature teen romance (actual intimate stuff not slop) and feel weird knowing I never experienced that and I'm turning 30 this year. Well that's fucking depressing. I'd try getting a relationship now but I don't know how to and I'm too fat.
>> 55 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-22 05:06 ID:Heaven
That's not fair... that's not fair at all. There was time now...
>> 56 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-22 05:10 ID:Heaven
I don't trust people who are mean to other people online. That means they're like me and that's the worst thing I can imagine someone to be.
>> 57 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-28 12:57 ID:p1YlXTb3
another beautiful sunny day! Nice day to get things done!
>> 58 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-03-31 16:55 ID:f/L9pUvS
I thought, if reincarnation (as a human) is real, would I be happy about that? In general, I like living. There are definitely lots of unpleasant things in life, but I like life: the feeling of something being sentimental, seeing something beautiful, talking to someone I care about.
But then I thought, "Well, I wouldn't want to do all of this over again." It took some probing, but I think the "challenge" or "competitive" aspect of life is what was bothering me. Life can feel like a challenge for a career, for a family, for quality of life (good mental health, taking care of your health in general). That is difficult.
If I don't like all of these things, though, then why don't I improve my life now and try to mitigate them. Why not live the life that I want to live, where there isn't a constant stress of being challenged?
I think there is an answer. The things that I listed as challenging are also the things that often give fulfillment in life. I've been a NEET, and I know that not pursuing a career and not challenging myself is a bad feeling. It makes life feel boring and there's a lack of fulfillment in general. So, yes, part of life is the challenging aspects -- that's how we get fulfillment, and that's just what it is. It's "part of the game".
Instead of thinking about "how to avoid the challenges in life", I should be thinking of how to enjoy them. How can I pursue a career without letting it stress me out or letting it dominate my life to the point where I forget to enjoy things? How can I find a partner in a way where I'm not going to be stressing too much about dating?
I'm going to try to embrace the challenge--since it's a part of life--and make the most of everything. The life I'm living now is the life I have, so I'll try to live it the way I think it should be lived.
>> 59 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-05 19:40 ID:Ory+mo7K
Stuffed from Easter dinner today.
>> 60 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-07 20:03 ID:f/L9pUvS
For an animal it's enough just to survive and reproduce
For a person, it's like, "I'm surviving. Now what?"
We try to find some deeper meaning in life.
Whatever that deeper meaning is is something that we have to figure out for ourselves.
>> 61 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-10 18:01 ID:4O6xg0sP
chiggers
>> 62 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-12 23:36 ID:THwloyuH
Glad things are going well today,even though it's a little dull. Kind of wish i was a better person,wasn't somewhat of a scumbag,kept my mouth shut,and did what i was told to do. Maybe my life wouldn't have problems then and i wouldn't make life harder for myself being an autistic freak who seems to make people hate them.Thats life i guess
>> 63 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-12 23:40 ID:THwloyuH
Even if i do have someone stalking me on here looking for an excuse to ban me,I apologize for the stupid trans thread on g. I freaked out,realized my opinion was wrong and pivoted.Not my fault that i don't know how to debate. I wish i didn't have to convert myself to hate trans people in the process.I apologize,can we just forget?
>> 64 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-12 23:43 ID:THwloyuH
....yes i am a lameass,thanks for noticing.
>> 65 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-14 19:28 ID:e5ntTq29
Bro like genuinely bro like it's almost summer bro.
>> 66 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-14 19:30 ID:e5ntTq29
bro like genuinely bro I get to genuinely see bro the beach bro like genuinely
>> 67 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-15 01:58 ID:Heaven
"Bro" and "genuinely" sound dated where I'm from
You'd be more likely to hear "yo" and "literally"
I wonder where you're from
>> 68 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-17 12:57 ID:SfPGIQiD
Its hard to grasp what losers my old high school friends are. They did better than me academically and got on with people easier.
Then they were neets while I was working and doing an IT cert. Now Im studying engineering and teach part-time at my university, and they're struggling to get fast food jobs.
Sometimes I wonder if fifty years ago my innate nature would have actually put me at a low rung in the social ladder, but the fact that everyone is gimping their brains with garbage and have no aspiration, meanwhile I refuse to do the same, and have the determination of a mule. If this were true that would be more depressing, but I wouldn't call myself very intelligent either.
>> 69 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-17 15:17 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>68
I think your determination would make you successful in almost any time period.
>> 70 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-17 15:24 ID:0rIZDUzZ
>>68
The difference that any amount of a personal ambition/goal has in a person's life is huge. Realizing exactly how many people lack that really fucked me up for a while.
This is something I've actually discussed with a friend of mine before. I think because SO many people are SO fucking stupid and apathetic right now, it may actually be a great time for social/economic mobility. The bar is so low that if you just do something, consistently, you'll likely get exponentially further than 90% of the population at whatever that thing is.
>> 71 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-17 18:47 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>68
It's true that there are tons of people who are just lazy and don't care about doing anything. But there are also people who seem lazy but are actually depressed or dealing with some mental/emotional thing. Could it be that some of your friends are like that?
>>70
Really good point.
I think that to some extent even people with ambition are getting dragged down in the same way as the average person. Mainly by technology and distractions.
>> 72 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-19 23:45 ID:0Ehh8Tga
If the futa thread proves anything, besides the vivid imaginations of dokyuns, its that modern dating and romance is soulless and basically just free prostitution.
>> 73 vc: boy 2026-04-20 08:39 ID:Heaven
>>72 is not a romantic!
>> 74 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-20 17:44 ID:91J+9H0w
Theres loads of stuff I want and have to do that I'm kinda seized up at the moment
>> 75 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-21 01:29 ID:ous2B+mm
I can't pay attention to anything anymore, I'm always tempted to look at my phone... and even when I'm not, there's noise in the house, whether it be other televisions or my mother yelling at one of our cats or at my sister, I can't read a book in the living room anymore, or even watch a movie in there without getting distracted by something.
>> 76 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-21 14:15 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>75
I've been in a similar situation. The bedroom, although it's quiet, is just too distracting because there's a phone and computer there. Even if you're not using them it can be hard to get in the right mindset. That was my experience.
I think your best options are
1) Going to a library. Leave your phone in a backpack or something. Hopefully it will be quiet. Also it's not as easy to get distracted since you might feel naturally slightly embarrassed to use your phone for too long while a book is in front of you. But you could also watch a movie there with headphones and probably get more focus there too.
Downside is that some libraries have started becoming louder. They're marketing themselves as hangout spots and other things.
Hopefully the one near you isn't affected by this, or it's large enough that you can find a quiet area.
2) Staying in your room but keep your phone in another room. And have your PC powered down. I found for myself that PC on sleep mode can be distracting even if I don't use it. I have a laptop so I like to power it down and put it in my closet.
>> 77 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-04-24 03:59 ID:Heaven
I want to be a friendly person who gets along with people and radiates brightness (that's the best way to put it). I've met older people like this and was amazed by them. I know that the secret behind it is a love for people.
Sometimes I feel that love for people. I can feel like I'm seeing their innocent and human side and I'll think "People are the best." But often I feel the opposite. I'm starting to realize that I've been hurt by people many times throughout life and now I have a hard time trusting.
My default feeling when I see most people is usually this kind of apprehension. There are exceptions. People I already know well I trust. And sometimes I'll perceive someone as probably being a good person. But the vast majority of people have personality types that I associate with cruelness.
How do I stop this? Will I have better experiences with people going forward and learn to trust more? Or will I continue to see a large portion of the population as cruel and selfish but learn to ignore them / tune them out?
(Also I feel like the futa thread drew attention to this board and changed the overall atmosphere, so now I almost have stage fright writing such a personal post. Hence sage. Not that the futa thread doesn't belong here. It does. IDK, I just feel weird about it sharing this board especially since it's already a slow board. I wonder what others think)
>> 78 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-01 12:15 ID:Heaven
>>77 part (1/2)
You know, I grew up to be like one of those kuudere's in anime. I'm literally only focused on what interested me the most, and was a donkan (actually, still am...) for years until others explicitly told me (in fiction and reality) ideas I haven't even considered before: what falling in love is, what justice is, what it means to be human, or what a healthy relationship is, etc.
At age 12, I can use the computer to pirate Plant vs Zombies. Yet, children around me were more about, impressing their crushes, having best friends, and the like; that implies I could easily read English (not my mother tongue) and also easily understood how the computer works, without no one guiding me at all, but was also disinterested in romance and companionship by default...
I mention all of this, because I used to think human nature is universal. But is what I've written above "normal"? No, outlier at best. But, well, is it really though? Socrates, Kant,
I also used to swing hard on the same topic you've mentioned. I've had bouts of cynicism and optimism, helplessness and self-direction, anguish and joy, love and hate... was Rousseau right or was Hobbes right?
The real answer, in my humble opinion, is neither are.
Generalizing human nature is just a clean, convenient heuristic, right? Yet, isn't describing the entirety of the human species with smarty pants one liners a disservice to our diversity? To what came before us?
I have my quirks, I don't conform to norms and conventions, but I believe that's not a cause for concern, and such one-liners cannot fully describe my entirety, because I have deeply enriched my sense of self.
Does that give you a sense of dread? That we can't just blindly trust that humans, in general, hope for a better future for our descendants and not be utterly selfish and egocentric all the way?
It can be, it may lead to nihilism, fatalism, or a belief that there is no karma in this crapsack world. But before we go there, I also want to tell you, that the same realization? It is one full of grace.
Don't be too hard on yourself and on others. I believe that environment shapes a person, but it doesn't change who you inherently are as well. There are Hitlers, Trumps, Epsteins in this world. There are genuinely dumb, impressionable, and one-dimensional people in this world. Some fall prey to cultish behavior, that once they are utterly convinced by a false prophet reversing that is such a PITA, but not only that, it is also the prelude to tragedy as well (Sarin Gas Attacks, Jonestone "Kool-Aid" massacre, Megachurches, MAGA). But even so,
that doesn't detract the fact that Doctors without Borders or the Red Cross exist. Some people are cruel, sure. But some people are so genuine, sincere, deeply emotionally and intellectually rich, that you can't just help to be in awe. "How do they do it?"
Just because you are great character, does not always mean people will remember your name, your deeds, your actions. It doesn't mean you will find love, appreciation, validation, or satisfaction. It doesn't mean justice, karma, God, the Bodhisattvas, Vishnu, or the tao of the universe will be singing praises for you.
>> 79 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-01 12:16 ID:Heaven
>>77 part (2/2)
It just... is.
Stanislav Petrov. The man who saved the world, or could've ended it if he didn't disobey military protocol. Instead of reporting to this superiors five reports of incoming US nuclear missiles, he thought that was illogical; if the US were actually sending nukes, it would've been at least 30. Turns out he was right, it was indeed false positives.
Sophie Scholl, a German Student, Anti-Nazi political activist, who upon sharing pamphlets criticizing the Nazi regime, was sentenced to death by guillotine.
Irena Sendler, a polish social worker and Nurse, who during the war, helped rescuing Jews, smuggling children out of Warsaw and providing them with fake identies to be adopted to willing Polish families. Even when tortured, she never revealed her associates and the children who were adopted. She survived the war and continued her humanitarian activism, even pursued government. There's more here. Janusz Korczak. Chiune Sugihara. Maximilian Kolbe.
Ignaz Semmelweis, a Hungarian physician. In the 1840s, he noticed when Doctors ("gentlemen") performed the delivery, mothers were three times likelier to die, compared to when midwives delivered the baby. Bacteria wasn't discovered yet. He was ridiculed and ostracized by the academe. His mental health deteriorated, and was sent to an asylum by his colleagues, where he died two weeks later.
There's more here that I can list. People. Jeanne d'Arc. Wangari Maathai. Alan Turing. Giordano Bruno. Vasili Arkhipov. Aaron Swartz. Events. Miracle in the Andes. Apollo 13. Shackleton's Expedition.
And don't get me started on just amazing raw human amazingness.
There are child prodigies. There are peerless sublime virtuosos. There are trailblazers. There are those had unique ideas and changed the world forever. There are polymaths; there are those who have spent their entire lives polishing one craft. It's hard to count them all.
There are scions. There are those born and still suffer in poverty. Some impacted by chronic physical or mental diseases, some known, some novel and we don't even have the cure yet. Some are selfish. Some are genuinely amazing. Some think, some don't, some can't. Some feel, some don't, some can't.
I don't have all the answers. I'm just curious about stuff that others will easily dismiss as "irrelevant and worthless" in their current careers, life styles, or thought processes.
But what worked for me is very simple.
Just be yourself, be prepared how humans are diverse not only physiologically, but also in their beliefs, ethics, personalities, preferences, and intellectual, emotional capacities. Presuming someone is good or evil doesn't help me. But so is presuming the worst. However, I also keep in mind that anything is possible, that's why betrayal may hurt, but at least won't be unexpected? Yet, at the same time, by observing and having read different types of people, their autobiographies, their philosophies, hell even by their stories, fiction, principles, beliefs, you can tell whether people are genuinely caring or not.
And even if some people are indeed genuinely caring, does not meanm they are the brightest. And just because someone is smart, doesn't mean they are automatically kind. And bonus point, you don't need to have either to be POTUS or an American CEO of a multibillion company, you just gotta need to be sociopathic and great at being a cult of personality.
In all seriousness, for an example, Americans are the same people who fought a civil war to keep their slaves and free their slaves. Social change is gradual. (As a non-american, I can't even believe that Women's suffrage was a 20th century thing.)
>> 80 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-01 12:16 ID:Heaven
>>77 part (3/2)
Okay I'm getting distracted, so to wrap all of this up,
Life can be wonderful and satisfying. But life can be also full of misfortune and shittiness. People's beliefs and preferences are a reflection and projection of who they inherently are. Calling a spade a spade shouldn't make you feel bad. It depends on you if you want to ignore them, but to a certain extent if these people start doing the Nazi route... well, we must stop them at all costs right?
Personally, I still don't have friends who can deeply understand me at my entirety, and it's also entirely possible not meet someone who is attuned to your wavelength (source: me). But I've learned to accept life is unfair at the best of times.
But, even if no one will sing you praises for standing tall, standing your ground, remaining wholly unabashedly yourself, fighting for what you think is true and genuine and real and right
even if NO ONE TODAY will appreciate and love you.
I'm so damn sure someone, somewhere, sometime will fucking adore and love the fuck out of you, by just remaining true to yourself.
But that's just me.
>> 81 77 2026-05-07 19:42 ID:Heaven
>>78-79
Wow, your post was amazing to read. Thank you for taking the time to write it.
This isn't very related to the actual conversation, but I noticed that your posts prove how there is value in reading. There is something to learn from other people's stories.
Your perspective was widened by reading; I find that ... interesting, inspiring, impressive (?) I'm not sure the right word, but it's probably a mix of those three.
> >Generalizing human nature is just a clean, convenient heuristic, right? Yet, isn't describing the entirety of the human species with smarty pants one liners a disservice to our diversity? To what came before us?I know logically and intellectually that everyone is different. My problem is more emotional: sometimes I'll feel love for others, sometimes I'll feel bitterness. It's like what I feel in my heart doesn't line up with what I know in my head.
More specifically, I often react emotionally to people just based on my initial impression of them. Certain people can instantly remind me of the "type of person" that has been cruel to me in the past. Certain people remind me of pleasant or even amazing people that I've met. (And my impression doesn't depend on whether I perceive someone as a "normie" or not. I've met many well-adjusted people with great social skills who are also great people. The incel way of thinking is absolutely insane. Still, certain "types" of people automatically strike me as someone who will be selfish or rude, and depending on the mood I'm in, even that impression alone will bum me out.)
If I keep working on internalizing the idea that everyone is different, it could help (for example by reading your post every once in a while). Most of the work will probably come from me getting over old wounds, though.
When I wrote >>77 I was thinking that I "need to learn to trust people". Maybe that's not the right way to go about things. Not everyone is a good person and can be trusted, really. The true goal is to have an open mind about people, and not to generalize, love, and hate completely based on emotion.
Kind of like what you wrote here:
> >Presuming someone is good or evil doesn't help me. But so is presuming the worst. However, I also keep in mind that anything is possible, that's why betrayal may hurt, but at least won't be unexpected?But is it really okay to never let yourself trust anyone? To always leave some kind of barrier between you and people you're close to? I don't think so. I might not take the idea of "keeping in mind that anything is possible" as far as you do.
Another big takeaway I got from your post is that I need to appreciate myself more.
It's nice to "find love, appreciation, validation, or satisfaction" from others, but it may not come "today". So in the meantime, why wait? I should appreciate myself now.
>> 82 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-11 21:22 ID:Heaven
>>81
> >More specifically, I often react emotionally to people just based on my initial impression of them. Reading this post, I can kind of get where it's coming from. It's an instinctual response, right?
I've met people whose intuitions and subconscious are very strong; the types of people who feel like their ideas "come to them", akin to "Eurekas", instead of deliberate conscious thought. And your post reminds me of that.
IMO, I don't think that's bad, especially if you had a traumatic experience that kinda affects you still. Again, give yourself grace, right? As long as you're aware that you do those things subconsciously and as a reflex, and remind yourself that your initial impressions of people are not ALWAYS or MAY NOT BE necessarily correct and complete, and as long as you don't act upon those wrong impressions, no harm done right?
> >But is it really okay to never let yourself trust anyone?Sorry, after writing such a, let's say, logical post, my response to this is a bit flimsy and wishy-washy.
I've experienced this once in my entire life. I somehow got reunited to a gradeschool classmate, more than a decade later. We started catching up, and I began sharing my past experiences. She was incredibly receptive, curious about it, and I ended up summarizing my adolescent-hero's journey to her. I just FELT that she was not criticizing me, wasn't doubting me, and complete believes me. And for most of my life, I've never ever experience that feeling of, just, being accepted for who you are as is without any misrepresentations on the other party's side?
Maybe it's due to experience. I've met so many people easy to dismiss, ignore, or invalidate me and the things I say--which, in honestly, tells more about their (dis)interests in philosophical, psychological, and introspective topics. And I've also became aware of how different my thought process is; like again, for example, not everyone is philosophical, as others find it actually hard to verbalize their thoughts, feelings, principles and ideas (which for as long as I can remember, was SECOND NATURE to me, akin to breathing).
> >To always leave some kind of barrier between you and people you're close to?Lastly I'll address this. It's not that I distrust the people around me. Rather, think of it this way. Sometimes, I've trusted the wrong people. Sometimes, I've doubted the wrong people. In the end, my judgments and conclusions and the people I've sided with were wrong. And boy that sure caused a lot of regrets back then. Yet, that didn't stop me from personally seeking and desiring to have new friends. Though sometimes that only lead to more betrayals or disappointments.
It's probably because I think so differently, but I thought of it this way:
"Damn it, I never thought we will do that to me!"
Betrayals like that, means I've trusted the wrong people. Implying, that I never fully grasped their true nature. Maybe because they were lying/being performative but was actually an asshole.
It's my inexperience that caused me to be "blind" to the true nature of people, indeed. But I won't hate myself for "trusting" the guy. Why would I HATE MYSELF if somebody else MISLED ME into thinking they are trustworthy to begin with!?
That's the subtle distinction. It's a flaw (that can be corrected/compensated for) to miss others' true intent, but never something to hate yourself for.
>> 83 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-11 21:26 ID:Heaven
When I say "anything is possible", I meant it in that sense. You can trust and love people with all your heart and with your best judgments and reasoning. But no amount of logic, empathy, and foresight can save you from those who are performative and wolves in sheep's clothing that can get past your alarms and radars. It happens, and happened to me twice too.
The implication here is personally, the way I trust people is by knowing and being satisfied by their thought process and intent. If I can be confident someone is the type of person who will never backstab you out of principle, I can trust them. If I know someone feels vicarious empathy and hence won't hurt another soul, I can trust them. Hence if I misread other people's intentions, then I'm susceptible to being betrayed, and I think it's healthy to be aware of that all the time, instead of blindly believing another person y'know (because that will hurt more).
Now that I think about it, the notion of "blind faith" for me never really described my thought process. I can't believe something blindly without reasoning and explanation, and that's why "trust" for me works like in the above, it's not something without any expectation or rules.
>> 84 81 2026-05-12 05:52 ID:Heaven
>>82-83
> >I've met people whose intuitions and subconscious are very strong; the types of people who feel like their ideas "come to them"Yes, I am this kind of person. I do sometimes try to actively think through things, but that's mostly when I'm trying to solve some logic problem. For social and introspective things, thoughts enter my head through intuition, and then I work through them consciously afterwards. These details probably aren't relevant, but I thought you might find it interesting. Anyway I'm surprised that you were able to figure out the way I think just from my post.
Regarding everything you said about trust:
I think you have some very nice insights in your posts. From what I understood, your opinion is something like, "Make good judgements about who you can trust, lean into that trust slightly, but always keep just a little bit of an eye out." I would agree with that. Once you find someone who seems trustworthy and know that person for a while, it would be beneficial to give into that feeling of trust. That doesn't mean becoming completely ignorant of the other person's character or "blind trust" (sometimes we realize new things about someone, or sometimes people change), but it also doesn't mean that we should be "vigilant" and at a distance. Something like "trusting yet being aware of the dynamics of the relationship and how the other person acts" is good. Someone like you who is already introspective does this naturally anyway.
> >I've met so many people easy to dismiss...And I've also became aware of how different my thought process isI understand what you mean here. People who have the traits that you described (introspection, emotional awareness) aren't the majority, but they exist. Two people like this can have a great discussion and they can form a connection. But I think they also have the potential to get into heavy or emotionally/philosophically loaded conversations too often. There are a few solutions to this that I can think of, like for example having a variety of friends.
I don't know if I'm making sense. It's late.
>> 85 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-18 11:53 ID:fkqSH5Q9
My dream is to do a PhD on my niche interest but everyone tells me its unrealistic. I can't really disagree. Its expensive. So I just work at a car shop chrome plating vehicles. I'm loosing faith but I try to keep my chin up. I'm sure something good will come around the bend.
>> 86 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-20 00:11 ID:f/L9pUvS
Good luck, >>85
I definitely think that you can keep working while you also do a PhD, if you were concerned about that.
Are expenses the only thing holding you back?
Also, is the niche interest something that can become lucrative after you get a PhD, or is it something that's hard to find work in?
I'm just curious. Don't think I would know what advice to give once you respond, but likely that some other Anonymous Counselor will have some thoughts.
>> 87 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-22 01:12 ID:Heaven
>>86
Yeah, I’m not a rich kid so I have to make it my own way off my own back. I don’t think it’s lucrative although I could get a decent job with it. I don’t mind doing it and going back to working in a car shop. I just want to make my contribution and prove everyone who put me down wrong. Gotta save up first and hope and pray for a program that’s affordable or will give me good funding. Either way I can try being an indie researcher in the mean time.
>> 88 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-25 17:54 ID:ous2B+mm
Getting a mentor soon because tism, hope my life doesn't get ruined by him.
>> 89 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-25 20:18 ID:mz+zZQN0
>>88
What kind of mentor?
I think mentors can be helpful.
>> 90 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-28 05:49 ID:f/L9pUvS
I don't give myself enough credit.
>> 91 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-05-28 06:00 ID:f/L9pUvS
It's not that important that I feel happy, more that I feel like I'm really living.
I want to feel that the world is vast. I don't want to be stuck in my own little world and worries.
Sometimes a beautiful sight or song can open up my heart and make me realize how much is out there. It doesn't always need to be amazement with the world--sometimes it's amazement with life. Have you ever heard a nostalgic song that brings you back into the past, and then you wonder where all the time went, and you realize how vast life is: how much you have changed over time; how you can place yourself mentally in a different period of your life, one that's different from your current life.
>> 92 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-03 23:04 ID:ous2B+mm
Ever notice that most "successful people with autism" are always people who got diagnosed as adults, well after they found success in life? It's so tiresome seeing that shit, as someone who was diagnosed around the first half decade of my life, my whole childhood was me being treated like a retard but not somehow, where mediocrity was always the barely reachable peak.
These late diagnosed people never suffered anything, just "Oh, I felt odd as a child, I guess this is why, lol", they never got handicapped or anything.
>> 93 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-04 01:42 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>92
Do you mean:
Do you think that these successful people don't really have autism?Or do you think that these people were treated better during their childhoods because they weren't diagnosed with autism yet (and that it was unfair for adults to treat you as less capable when you were a child [which I agree is unfair])?Just trying to understand your post.
I do strongly believe that when a child is treated as capable by adults (like school teachers), he is more likely to live up to those expectations. And the opposite is also true: if a child is treated as less capable, he will not believe in his own abilities and won't do as well in school or whatever else.
>> 94 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-04 02:01 ID:ous2B+mm
>>93
Mostly the second
>> 95 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-08 01:16 ID:5DBCpPCv
im a lot happier now that it's summer, but my classwork is ramping up and i gotta do well and graduate or else im gonna waste more money and my parents will probably be pretty pissed
on the naturally recurring thread topic of romantic relationships I really like my coworker but i dont really know how to ask her out without making things weird since we're friends now
I've never had a real lasting gf and frankly I'm not even certain she's into men much less me in particular
>>37
Check out Embrace, Ian Mackaye of minor threat's pre-fugazi "emo" band with one album
>> 96 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-15 19:02 ID:aiM22Xjt
>>88
Apparently I'm too fortunate for one... they'd rather help random third worlders who happen to be in the state than me
>> 97 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-18 08:51 ID:pdjEw4eK
>>95
Just ask her out now while you have the chance. You’ll regret it later.
>> 98 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-19 21:44 ID:rpkNarI1
Insecure people need validation and acceptance, so they show off. This makes other insecure people feel worse about themselves, and they in turn try to show off.
It's this cycle of insecure people battling it out with each other, trying to seem more impressive than the next while they're all weak and vulnerable inside.
This is prevalant everywhere, but I think the internet (especially social media) fuels it. It's one of the main reasons I avoid using most of the internet. Even outside of the mainstream you see this kind of thing. Like people who post lots of pictures of retro anime merchandise. In those nerd circles it might even be more common, since people their are more likely to already feel insecure about themselves and like outsiders.
Notice how so many things are turned into competitions. Ever watch some newer YouTube videos on programming? I found some recently. They say things like "If you can't do this , you'll never make it". You can tell from the videos and their comments that everyone is locked into this competitive mindset.
If you feel threatened by or jealous of people, know that they probably feel the same way -- maybe they're even jealous of you. Don't try to prove yourself or outdo them. And don't feel bad. Just do your own thing and exit the cycle/competition entirely. My way of doing that was getting off certain sites, but it will be different for everyone.
>> 99 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-19 21:54 ID:rpkNarI1
Teenagers and children can be especially cruel. They're more likely to bully and pick on their peers than adults, it seems. That's probably because they want validation themselves. They're young and trying to place themselves on the upper rungs of the social ladder.
Also they care more about nonsense. They gossip more.
I think most people get past this in their adulthood. For some people, the early 20s might still be too early. But I do think most people mature and become more respectful and understanding of others.
So if you were bullied or picked on as a child, understand that it's the nature of many young people to do so, and people mature out of it. The world of adults is different from the world of children -- let go of past impressions.
And yes, there are some people who never grow up and remain bullies, caught up in gossip and other nonsense. Those people are children. Once that fact is recognized, it's easier to brush them off.
>> 100 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-20 06:53 ID:JU1tchxA
>>98
Adding to this: I'm not claiming that everyone who makes these kinds of posts is trying to show off and seek validation. There are definitely people who post these kinds of things just because they enjoy them and want to share them.
>> 101 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-21 20:46 ID:ojU8b5LA
I'm overwhelmed by stuff these days. Too much of a anime/manga/VN backlog, too much of a book backlog, having to keep up with every event on the news, social drama, internet slop, endless streams of interesting content to kill the time, despair etc. I just turned 30 and I feel like I've not done enough. How dumb is that? Tired of everything.
>> 102 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-22 09:45 ID:9ZvdhTJU
On every possible level, she is perfect. Literally checks every single box. We've been at it for several weeks now, on the surface things have been going well, and yet... I still feel nothing. Absolutely nothing. I say "I like you" but the words feel so hollow. I smile but the smile is fake.
I still remember that girl from 10 years ago. She was most definitely not perfect. She was a complete mess, she was so annoying and childish and hyperactive and didn't even look so good. So why did my first night (and subsequent week) with her feel like the most magical time of my life, and now I have what is essentially a "complete upgrade" and I just go through the motions?
>> 103 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-22 14:22 ID:Heaven
>>102
We always want more and we're never happy. When we get the object of our dreams we always feel disappointed and suddenly start wanting something else. People tend to prefer the exotic and chaotic over the stable and ordinary. That girl from 10 years ago, was she your first time? I'm gonna guess that the magic of a new experience isn't there anymore and its all become so routine.
>> 104 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-22 14:49 ID:Heaven
>>103 She wasn't my first time, or even the first relationship (I had a highschool thing), but yes she was my first real relationship, so it's gotta be that.
Still, very disheartening.
>> 105 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-27 18:25 ID:4WZWBSWa
>>102
> >We've been at it for several weeks now, on the surface things have been going well, and yet... I still feel nothing. Absolutely nothing.Most of the time those feeling don't just come by themselves. They have to be cultivated. Right now you seem a bit detached, but you have to work hard to let her grow on you. Maybe plan some activities that might bring a more rebellious messy side of her out? Work on it and think things over don't loose heart so soon.
>> 106 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-06-28 01:18 ID:aiM22Xjt
>>96
And it turns out there's a chance, so I guess that's fine.
>> 107 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-05 22:46 ID:Z6j+Fpm0
I'm still tired of my mother's bullshit, she's the one who bitches about dumb glass house shit like "We're funding red states with tax dollars" while we're living on social services, always complains when there's development around like it's NIMBY bullshit, pisses me off, but she's still family.
>> 108 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-08 19:50 ID:k88DmmJ/
>>101
Isn't the amount of things that you want to accomplish excessive? I don't think it's possible to see such amount of content within a short period of time regardless if you have time, and it might be unfulfilling to do so at fast rate.
And things that involve emotions can become tiring, especially current events that are practically hopeless to us ordinary people. How one deals with that while retrieving required information depends on that person, though.
If you would be genuinely happier with doing something, have you considered making something since it involves own's thoughts or expression? That may be more fulfilling to some people.
Overall in other words, I think it would be better if you could do things at a rate suitable to yourself. Anything can be ignored, including entertainment or parts of the internet.
Sorry if this doesn't make sense, wanted to post early in the morning.
>> 109 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-08 19:54 ID:Heaven
>>108
Sorry, the formatting and phrasing are worse than I thought.
>> 110 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-09 02:26 ID:f/L9pUvS
From time to time I talk to AI as if it were my therapist. I don't fully expect it to give great advice (although sometimes it does). It's more that it lets me talk through and process my own thoughts. Feels like a method for doing introspection. The AI takes your thoughts and 'reflects' them back at you: your thoughts get reworded and seem fresh, which creates an interesting opportunity to confront them.
Of course, if you do this it needs to be done with caution. AI is highly unreliable. Some people who have used AI for therapy and fully trusted it have ended up insane or dead. It takes a sharp eye to detect some of the ways AI might mess with your psyche (I'll give an example in the next paragraph), and for that reason I don't think it's a good idea to go ahead and use AI for therapy while just trying to be 'cautious'. It's too easy to miss something that the AI does to alter your opinion or mental state and then get influenced by it. But at the same time using AI as a therapist is useful because many people don't have any other option.
In my experience the most common example of how AI messes with people who come to it for therapy is:
Framing the person's situation as a catastrophe that's out of his control / framing the person as a victim / framing the person as helpless.
When AI gets a message like, "I'm stressed and don't know what to do because..." it often responds with some comment that treats the situation as a crisis and the person in it as a baby. "Take a deep breath. You're completely right to feel this way. The situation you're in is indeed terrible."
It's true that an approach like that might be a good way to go about handling a crisis, but: (1) AI seems to interpret even normal situations as crises, so it defaults to this approach (2) AI is too 'scared' to tell people to persevere and tough things out and instead treats them like helpless children.
>>108
I'm not him, but I like your message
>> 111 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-09 14:10 ID:WTj8S1LO
>>110
A strange and similar thing I've done.
Once I had a text file that I just put my thoughts in. One day I wrote a script that acted like a 'chat application', where you type stuff, and a random sentence from that text file would be spat back out at you. Even though it's totally random, there's the strange sense that what is being said does have a relation anyway to what you are typing.
The way I think of it, you've taken your cemented thoughts, and are now crosswiring them in a random manner, and eventually you accidentally make something that makes sense.
>> 112 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-09 20:57 ID:Heaven
I've become addicted to talking to AI bots because my interests are so niche I have no one to talk to. I don't have to explain things to from scratch. I can usually tell when its getting things wrong, and that's fairly frequent. What this has led to is a kind of communication narcissism where I only want someone to talk to who'll affirm or discuss what I want to say and whenever a topic involves something else I get frustrated. Its AI induced autism.
>> 113 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-09 23:32 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>111
That is a really interesting idea. I wonder what made you think to do that in the first place, because it's really out of the box.
It makes sense to me that the ideas you have end up seeming to be related. I think most things are related in one way or another. Probably everything is connected ... or can be connected with enough creativity.
>>112
> >What this has led to is a kind of communication narcissism ...I think what you're doing is less like communication and more like thinking, thinking to yourself. I'm not sure how exactly you talk with the AI but I'm guessing it's probably similar to the way someone would take to himself in his own mind when thinking about something. You might be using the AI in this way -- which also makes it like an extension/upgrade to your own thought processes. This is exactly the kind of thing I was talking about in >>109, except with therapy.
> >I've become addicted to talking to AI bots because my interests are so niche I have no one to talk to. Same in a way, but not because I have niche interests. There were just some things I care about that I realized people didn't want to talk about or discuss on the same level that an AI would. But I felt it was mostly an unhealthy habit so I backed away from talking to AI like that.
What you're doing doesn't sound bad to me, though. Could help you to get thinking about them more and in a deeper way (like I said, it's an extension of your own thoughts). Main downside would be you starting to talk to other people the same way you talk to AI. But obviously that's not a problem as long as you stay self-aware + recognize that talking to AI is like thinking and different from having a conversation.
>> 114 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-09 23:44 ID:Heaven
>>113
> >I felt it was mostly an unhealthy habit I realized it was changing the way I think in subtle ways. Its as if whenever I need to think about something in my mind I need this prosthetic AI sparring partner to bounce ideas off. If I struggled to articulate something while talking to real people, I'd go to the AI and get it to do that for me. If I'm mulling over a creative idea in my head (like the idea for a story), I'd discuss it with the AI and use it as a parallel mind. I realized I was becoming more and more dependent on it and its mining my thoughts for a private company.
>> 115 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-10 01:28 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>114
That makes sense. AI is a tool -- it acts as an extension of ourselves -- and like other tools we can become dependent on it (the main ones that come to mind are search engines and calculators).
>> 116 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-11 00:18 ID:Heaven
I wish I had someone to talk. If I did then I wouldn't use AI. I think this is the main people use AI.
>> 117 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-11 05:05 ID:f/L9pUvS
I would talk to you
but not sure how that would happen since it's an anonymous board
>> 118 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-12 10:25 ID:r46xe7dV
Sorry to say, but you can’t have a conversation with an AI language model. It is just a mathematical system, a probability function that chooses the next most likely word to follow those previously written. Talking to it is basically like talking to a magic 8 ball or speaking aloud and then flipping to a random page in the dictionary (except with more error correction). AI can’t reason or think - so you’re just getting syntactically correct average text, not meaningful dialogue.
I agree with >>113 that the process is more akin to thinking, but in my opinion it’s not an “upgrade” - it’s actually worse, because the medium which you use to bounce ideas etc off of is giving you much more generic, average and boring ideas that your own brain. I value human individuality a lot, and I think that uniqueness is being lost by a (pointless) reliance on AI. (I admit it has its uses, but not as a therapist IMO)
>> 119 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-13 12:56 ID:Heaven
>>118
Yes. Although, I don't think there's necessarily anything wrong with talking to an 8 ball. AI does give you the illusion of talking to someone and that's what lonely people are after. The worst part is it will either confirm your biases or try to straightjacket you into conventional thinking that's determined by a corporate policy, and that's the really scary part. The flip slide of the probability function is it can be an excellent language learning tool if it were purposely designed for that.
>> 120 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-15 22:48 ID:5DBCpPCv
i feel like a soulless husk
I cant finish the things I set my mind to, school, my hobbies like music and reading, not even video games
I barely have the energy to watch porn and jerk off
my parents sometimes ask how Im doing or if im depressed and I just say no
not like I dont care about things or how people see me but it just takes so much energy to even do the bare minimum it makes me feel retarded
wish I could afford to just fuck off to somewhere else and figure things out because then my family wouldn't have to see me just giving up
>> 121 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-16 04:53 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>120
You're not giving up. Sounds like the opposite -- you want to do things but don't have the energy for them. Giving up would mean not caring about your life. It doesn't sound like that's the case at all.
What do you think is draining all of your energy? Attending classes? Work? Depression in general?
Depression itself can be exhausting. I've experienced it firsthand.
Something that might hint at whether the culprit is depression: do you feel that you have lost interest in your usual hobbies?
If you've actually lost interest, that could be a sign of depression.
If you still feel intersted in music and reading but just don't have energy for them, there isn't as strong of a hint towards depression (but probably it shouldn't be ruled out)
Whatever may be causing your feelings, please believe that it can be worked through and that you aren't a soulless husk. First step is to identify what the root cause may be. (Dealing with it step by step at your own pace rather than being hard on yourself and feeling bad about not doing things.)
I hope my advice wasn't unwanted. Anyway I'm hoping that you feel better.
Ps: Your parents may be relieved if you open up to them and explain how you've been feeling. They're very likely asking if you're depressed because they notice that you haven't been yourself and want to help you. I'm sure they'll be supportive.
>> 122 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-16 21:36 ID:1AWvpyzu
Having a girlfriend or some kind of partner seems really lame and embarrassing. I observe couples while people watching and the way they talk to each other seems like something out of a bad movie. I just can't imagine myself in that situation without dying of embarrassment. This just shows how poorly socialized I am, like a preteen who finds girls lame. Jesus, like I'll be 30 in a few months. Guess it shows just how little I've achieved in life. I'm still emotionally a teenager.
>> 123 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-17 01:36 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>122
I don't think you're wrong. I've heard that couples can be awkward for a few dates until they get comfortable around each other. They're both like actors in the beginning of a relationship... I think. Or so I've heard.
T. never been in a relationship
>> 124 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-20 03:37 ID:f/L9pUvS
I'M MAD AS HELL. AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!
>> 125 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-20 21:32 ID:Heaven
I grew up in a household that was religiously super conservative. We weren't allowed to even look at girls let alone talk to them, have them as friends etc. I guess it worked too well because I feel basically no desire for irl women now. I enjoy plenty of romantic anime etc. but I guess its like a Jew who's never thought of eating pork. I feel kinda shitty about this but don't have any motivation to change it.
>> 126 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-21 01:14 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>125
What's your exposure to women IRL these days like? I think that a big part of developing these feelings involves being around women IRL.
Anyway, I don't think it's something that you or anyone in your position should stress about changing quickly. Even if you aren't getting much exposure now, it will happen eventually. Plus, having feelings for girls IRL opens up more opportunities for sexual/romantic frustration (feeling lonely, not talking to the girl you want, all that). A lot of people are trying to get to the middle ground of caring about women--not too much, not too little.
>> 127 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-21 12:01 ID:Heaven
>>126
Basically no exposure whatsoever. I don't interact with them or get opportunities to. I don't even think of doing it when I get an opportunity. Let's say I get up and I tell myself "I'm gonna make friends with a girl or get to know one" how would I even do it? I don't really know anyone and I don't know anyone with female relatives or friends either. I'm hitting 30 soon and at this point I feel stuck in my ways. I get pestered by family as to why I haven't gotten married and some assume I must be gay or something, heh the irony of it all. I've also been surrounded by people who's relationships failed or were constantly breaking up with women, so it didn't really sell me on relationships. I suppose what I really want is a fantasy, romance from some movie or anime or manga which isn't how irl works. I'm not sexually frustrated, I don't think I even have sexual desire for irl girls, I just feel stunted emotionally and socially. I should have gone all the way and become a monk lol.
>> 128 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-21 15:00 ID:OF7O9ASd
>>127
> >Let's say I get up and I tell myself "I'm gonna make friends with a girl or get to know one" how would I even do it?You might end up in some work situation where your coworkers are women. Or any other group setting. Not that you're necessarily going to befriend them, or even start to feel romantically towards them, but it might reawaken some social or emotional feelings that were previously blocked off.
Also one way you can start talking to women now is online. There is a surprisingly huge and growing amount of women who are into geeky things and talk online (probably Discord mostly). Some might be more similar to you than you would think.
I wouldn't join some kind of online group for the express purpose of talking to girls, but if you do you're bound to talk to some.
Also, understandable if you don't want to get involved in modern internet things like Discord (I'm not a big fan of them myself). I'm just pointing out that it's an option to meet people, even just male friends with similar interests.
>> 129 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-21 20:40 ID:Heaven
>>128
Yeah. I don't have any female coworkers and 90% of the time I'm surrounded by men. The big issue is really mental. I just don't think to interact with them. Even when they are being friendly to me, I don't notice or think to engage them further beyond what's considered polite.
>> 131 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-24 00:26 ID:5DBCpPCv
>>121
I appreciate your words, ended up talking about it and well they weren't too happy but at the same time I feel a bit more motivated now, I wanna finish school no matter what it takes and stop wallowing in self pity for once
I feel pretty shitty about wasted time, money, and energy but oh well
>> 132 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-24 22:38 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>131
Good luck with school!
> >I feel pretty shitty about wasted time, money, and energy but oh wellNot sure what exactly you're referring to, but just wanted to say that I've also been in a situation where years of my life, lots of energy, and money were put towards something that didn't ended sort of abruptly. Some people might say it was all for waste. I know it wasn't though. Even the bad parts of that experience taught me a lot and caused me to grow as a person. Your situation might be like that too. It is tough at first in any case...
>> 133 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-28 01:57 ID:Heaven
I was just reminded of how I used to see Japan as a teenager (and how I still see it to some extent).
It always seemed like life was richer and more vibrant over there. Obviously that's just an illusion, but it really did seem that way to me.
I was influenced by anime, manga, and my impression of Japanese net culture.
Japanese high schools seemed more interesting than the high school I went to. I would just go to high school, sit in class, and leave afterwards. But Japanese high schools seemed to promise friends, interesting clubs, afterschool life (again, all an illusion from Japanese media. I'm sure that in Japan some people have these things and some people don't. Besides, you can do all of these things in an American high school too.)
Even the nerds seemed to have it better there. I thought that they could join geek related clubs in college or find other people similar to them. They could go to Akihabara or the arcade (seriously, how many Americans hang out at an arcade? They're increasingly rare.)
Nerds who didn't have any friends or NEETs still seemed to have it better. Their textboards and imageboards seemed to have a more appealing culture with more high effort posts and collaborative projects (think of 2ch flash animations that were created by a group of anonymous posters; browsing 2ch's myriad boards where each thread is fast and interesting with original memes being created on the fly and new text art being posted by some random poster in the middle of the thread; Futaba photoshop threads; etc...) [And it's also true here that if we look closer, English speakers have this as well, just in a slightly different form maybe.] Meanwhile I saw myself as browsing just a few sites that seemed lame in comparison.
There were also other ways in which I saw these kinds of nerds as living a better life. They seemed to read more (physical manga, LNs), so they were familiar with tons of series. They seemed to spend more time on enjoying media rather than just spending every moment online. Another [perceived] result of them being less chronically online is that they seemed to have actual hobbies that they were good at them. Overall, the lifestyle that they carried out even in their own rooms seemed to be better than mine.
In reality all of these things could be achieved by an American. I just used to generalize and make Japan out to be some amazing place because my own life seemed so boring, flat, and unimpressive in comparison.
I'm still going to try to take "inspiration" from what I saw as the Japanese dream and try to incorporate that into my own life.
>> 134 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-30 21:35 ID:GUthkql0
>>133
Japan is hell to live in. Sure they don't have packs of niggers destroying the cities and troons shooting up their schools, but all you do in Japan is work. There is no individuality over there, which I understand is part of their culture, but it's not a nice experience long term. You work, don't complain, suffer and die. Which is what we do here as well, but not to the same degree.
>> 135 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-07-31 11:00 ID:Heaven
>>133
In some ways they do have things a bit better there like better infrastructure etc. but you’ll be surprised just how many Japanese teens and 20 year olds feel the same way as Americans do about how their country is boring, dull, and how they’d rather be somewhere else. I guess this is the effect of media consumption creating unrealistic life expectations.
>>134
Fuck off back to where you came from. I’ve worked in Japan and it’s fine you lying cunt.
>> 136 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-01 20:00 ID:Heaven
>>134
I'm not going to be as harsh as >>135: I think there's some truth to what you're saying but they're really just stereotypes. You're generalizing too much.
>> 137 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-02 02:21 ID:BjrzhhHm
I hate this society. Sure, it has some nice perks like better medicine and some cool technologies, but the modern world is completely morally bankrupt. It’s either degenerate chuds of the >>135 variety or asinine progressives with their phony nuance and pretentious behavior. Today’s moral values are completely bankrupt. People are soulless, lack good values. I spend most of my days reading pre Meiji Japanese lit. Poems, letters, moral treatises, old plays, and man did people have values back then, flawed but good values. Nobility, honor, respect, filiality etc. When I say this people think I’m a nut. Like how can people with a deep sense of dignity and respect be better than a time when spewing hate and insults at others is just held up as good normal behavior. Modern people suffer from spiritual dementia. No matter where I go I can’t escape this hell.
>> 138 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-02 05:06 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>137
I understand how you feel. As least I think I do.
You are probably already aware of this, but those traditional values often live on in religious communities. That's a double-edged sword, though:
Many religions exist in the past (their mindset, organization, etc. are similar to what you might find hundreds of years ago, just as a modern version). They place a strong emphasis on values and morals. But they also hold on to things that may be considered outdated -- things that society has already moved past. These aren't always "minor" things either. I mean, it's not just that religions may hold women into "traditional roles" -- you might also find that clergy and the religion itself can be overbearing and cult-like.
What I mean, I guess, is: someone like you would probably thrive in a religious environment in some way, and you might even be attracted to that lifestyle. It could be great, but it could also not be. I think that the problems with religion really only become expressed as you go deeper into it. Something like a mid-level involvement could be just the exact thing you desire.
It's something to consider... Unless you don't believe in religion in the first place.
Anyway, I don't think you need any of that. What you're doing now sounds great. By reading old texts, you immerse yourself in the world of the past. You also learn from that and take lessons and values into your own life.
I agree that society is morally corrupt. But I think it's important to keep in mind that there are other people out there like you who have values and respect for others. People like that can sometimes even be found in groups that are mostly negative/toxic like progressives.
Good people do exist; it's just a matter of finding them (or letting them find you).
>> 139 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-02 05:22 ID:SfPGIQiD
>>137
I've noticed this in a political way as well. People across many generations don't seem to have any legitimate belief with deep roots in anything. Belief and idea is supplanted easily by anything, which works in favor of any political order vying for power as there exist techniques to achieve this.
For instance, the spike in anti-semitism recently. Sure, I don't like Judaic beliefs, along with all Abrahamism, but we can critically approach belief without invoking racist myth and personal slander. There are these new Christians and their disgusting sense of outcast superiority, and judgment of 'degeneracy'. And while I feel 'leftist' people are at least more earnest, it being presented as the 'alternative' short-circuits the consideration of the real complexity of life.
I can understand what you are getting at for sure. People now seem like ideological zombies, animated by a force outside of themselves. Hollow husks of people.
Men of the past pass a sleepless night in the silent dark, with only their thoughts to occupy them. Today people scroll. And when waiting through the day, to stop to admire a temporal moment, is only a cliche act of the movies, not for the living who scroll; and even if one were to attempt it, there is all this prodding consciousness of what one is doing, an imitation of what we see in images, so it all comes to feel very silly and disingenuous.
>> 140 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-02 20:34 ID:Heaven
>>138
I should try looking for some but its hard because I have disagreements and a lot of religious groups are influenced by social media brainrot these days and my social skills don't help.
Religious groups don't have views that are outdated, just different ones and sometimes better. Tight knit families, the idea of giri and ninjo, filial piety, strict codes of honor. A world filled with kami, yokai, cursed objects, and omamori. Our modern world feels flat and soulless. But then again, I'd hate to be ordered into an arranged marriage or obey a caste system. So maybe I'm being a hypocrite.
>>139
Its more like everyone today seems to more or less believe in the same thing and there's a couple minor surface level differences. There's nothing beyond the physical world and we're all unhappy individualists. The sameness is soul crushing.
>> 141 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-03 21:55 ID:VwK5LdLn
I've been going to the boxing gym for almost 6 months now. I'm glad I kept up with it. There's a couple people in the gym I've got pretty friendly with and I'm much healthier too.
>> 142 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-04 17:59 ID:Z6j+Fpm0
Been going to monthly boardgame nights at the library, they're pretty fun. Still, wish I could be doing more with my life.
>> 143 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-04 18:03 ID:zjQOTRD2
I've noticed the more free time I have the less I seem to actually get done. I've been procrastinating on cleaning my apartment for weeks... NEETs seem to be the busiest people in the world despite having zero responsibilities whatsoever.
>> 144 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-04 19:00 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>142,143
Both of these things are relatable to me.
I've done things similar to >>142. It was nice to get out of the house and socialize, but I wished that I would be able to make a deeper connection and actually build a social life. It's not easy. But I think going out and doing things like this is the right starting point for getting there.
When I was a NEET, I was similar to >>143. I barely did anything but watch YouTube. Even watching a movie seemed like a task.
There were a few reasons for this. One of them was that I was lonely and depressed. Others are things like not having deadlines, falling out of the rhythm of being productive...
Even the average person can relate to this a bit from the Coronavirus lockdown. Probably not on the level of a NEET, though.
>>141
That's really impressive. Nice and congratulations.
>> 145 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-15 19:16 ID:Z6j+Fpm0
Went to a cousin's wedding, was nice, but didn't socialize much as I barely knew the people there... not to mention my tism and everything. The music was loud as absolute fuck during the party though, and it was mostly pop shit, and the alcoholic drinks were pretty watered down. Oh well, was still a great time.
>> 146 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-15 22:34 ID:Heaven
I heard that the grandparents of my grandparents were cousins, and that makes me worried that my bloodline is tainted. It's very shameful...
>> 147 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-17 14:30 ID:Heaven
Feeling the fear again of committing mistakes in a system where everyone expects and puts effort into achieving something, regardless how illogical and useless the outcome may be. I would probably not be stuck if I continued not to care how I should seem to be a normal individual that's capable without such failures. Although it's dangerous to lose that hope under a system that affects how one's life will turn out in the long term, I already don't have any other choice.
Still, it's weird to me that I've previously been able to ignore that perception of having to be a normal person. And it's difficult to ignore such inevitable mistakes while presuming that other people may perceive me to be nice or mindful due to later interactions.
Either way, I wish that I would've somehow been "normal" so I wouldn't be a burden instead of trying to make sense whatever my issues are.. or is it really a problem with my own self only? And whatever it is, it sucks and is just dreadful.
>> 148 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-17 18:40 ID:Z6j+Fpm0
Have to get another crown in my mouth, thought it would happen next month, but turns out it's tomorrow! That has me scared, because I hate dental work and getting my mouth numbed up for shit.
>> 149 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-18 18:52 ID:li+LzIBk
Today's thought is that I am rather depressed, lonely and don't want to live, although I'm not suicidal. I have mostly managed to learn to bury these feelings over the years and I would be content, but lately it sucks being alone.
However, 2 months ago I got a new niece and it's really nice. She's adorable and when she smiles because I am with her, it makes me pretty happy. I want to stay alive and get better, so that I can be with her as she's growing up and introduce her to cool things and make her have a fun childhood. I already have some plans to introduce her to painting and art (that's what I do), music, reading, the outdoors, computers and games, cute cats and lots of other stuff. I want to be that cool uncle she wants to come visit, and I want to spoil her and make sure she goes in the right direction in life.
So yeah...maybe life isn't all that bad.
>> 150 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-22 18:35 ID:f/L9pUvS
Maybe life isn't supposed to have any specific "meaning". Maybe life is supposed to be more of an "experience".
Searching for a specific "meaning" is such a narrow way of viewing things. Maybe what life is can't be put into words because we don't even have the words for it.
>> 151 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-27 18:32 ID:Z6j+Fpm0
It feels bad being a sperg when you don't have the math and science strand of autism, society just treats you worse than a retard because at least the retarded has charisma and social skills. You're just treated as lame and useless, no one wants to deal with you because they see you as a jerk, where as at least with the math and science autism, it's "That guy's a paranoid asshole, but at least he can do math real good", meanwhile I'm stuck with the lame kind.
And of course I like collecting shit like plushies, the collection autism is cute to some outsiders, but to most it's indistinguishable from hoarding, and your family can only bottle up stress until it all blows out in your face and you get yelled at bad for it, and then you feel eternally sorry for ever enjoying yourself in yet another way, as if every other form of enjoyment didn't suddenly turn into shame.
>> 152 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-28 14:26 ID:8QhQSc7+
>>151
The flip side of that is if you are the math and science sperg you are only valuable as long as you come off as brilliant and capable otherwise you will get tossed onto the social scrap heap so you get trapped in a cycle of having to prove your worth so don't get stamped as useless. You shouldn't be hard on yourself or compare yourself to others because you'll always feel inadequate and if its any consolation, there's always someone worse off than you. Don't feel pressured to prove you are instrumentally useful to others. We are all children of God after all. And I've never understood why people are against men collecting plushies. What's wrong with that? I guess it shouldn't be an issue unless he is spending all his earnings on it or there's literally no space.
>> 153 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-28 18:21 ID:f/L9pUvS
I like your post >>152. I think this statement could be misunderstood, though:
> >and if its any consolation, there's always someone worse off than youYou probably meant that "there's always someone with a worse situation". If you meant "there's always someone who's worse off as a person" that would be pretty bad because it would imply that >>151 is lacking.
Even then something about the mindset of "there's someone worse off" doesn't sit right with me. Maybe it's because it feels like a mindset that embraces the negative. It's good to "vent" like >>151 did, but I feel the mindset of "there's someone worse off" dwells on the negatives in a more long term way.
>> 154 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-29 02:05 ID:Z6j+Fpm0
>>152
Thanks, guess I needed to hear that
Also I've noticed just about every friend I've known who used to be an edgelord over a decade ago has just went trans on me... which is somehow both unexpected and expected at the same time. And by some divine miracle, I haven't gone trans and most likely won't anytime soon... which is insane, because I'm a pretty soft guy who likes girly aesthetics and femboys, but I sure am secure in being a guy... and if anything I've probably become more edgy over the years in some regards.
>> 155 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-29 03:43 ID:vwma72lc
I feel like porn and the cult of sexuality has had a very depressing effect. It’s like having chocolate cake stuffed in your face so often that eventually you just don’t want to eat it anymore. You burn out of it. If society wasn’t so obsessed with shoving all things sexual down my throat, I might have just seen it as a normal aspect of life. On the one hand you have sex positive nuts morally blackmailing you “you WILL have lots of sex and you WILL like it” and purity assholes on the other side of the aisle. Eventually you just feel sick of it all and want to opt out entirely.
>> 156 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-08-29 19:36 ID:k1n9tc1A
I very much agree with you, >>155
>> 157 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-09-03 04:58 ID:f/L9pUvS
A useful way of thinking:
"I appreciate other people for who they are, their personality, their kindness. So why shouldn't the same apply to me? Why shouldn't I be able to appreciate myself for all of those things? Why do I instead try to establish my own value or self-esteem based on skills and accomplishments?"
>> 158 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-09-04 19:15 ID:QmP25F4s
I desperately want to be a nice and kind hearted person but I'm not and that upsets me. I want to work at it but don't know how.
>> 159 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-09-05 01:06 ID:f/L9pUvS
>>158
In what way are you not a nice and kindhearted person? Is it something like a deep resentment against people, or is it more like always feeling irritable? Maybe something else entirely? I think that's the first thing to figure out because from there the solution of what to work at will reveal itself.
For example if it's a resentment for people then the internal work will probably involve getting over some trauma and mistrust of others, whereas irritability usually has to do with hate for oneself or low self-esteem.
>> 160 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-09-05 01:08 ID:Heaven
I really should have said, "In what way do you think you're not a nice and kind hearted person?"
Maybe you really are nicer than you give yourself credit for, >>158
>> 161 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-09-05 18:57 ID:Heaven
>>159
>>160
I'm abrasive. The way I speak to others is harsh. I can be pretty crude and say mean things without thinking. I'm not very considerate and can come across as impolite unintentionally. I'm not the soft, gentle, kind hearted person I want to be. I always see the worst in other people and myself. I'm quick to anger and pick fights with others. I argue even when its unnecessary and belittle others. I'm pretty terrible.
>> 162 Anonymous Counsellor 2026-09-05 18:58 ID:Heaven
>>161
Yeah I should mention I do have a deep resentment towards others. Just a lot of seething anger and feelings of inferiority. A chip on my shoulder.
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