we love the web email us go to messageboard newsletter archive home NEWSLETTER: ISSUE 81: "RE: YOUR QUERY" next issue » « previous issue This Week: * ANIM - Fatcat & Satan * VIDEO - Punk Rock Hamsters * PHOTOS - Stupid Animals ------------------------------------------------- ________ ____ __ ___ ____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | ___/ _ |/_ > The Silliest Photos in the World << Cornholio. What does that mean? We know but we're not going to tell you. However we are going to tell you that if you type it into Google - you get the best photos ever, we've picked our favourites and put them here. Enjoy. http://www.b3ta.com/features/cornholio/ >> Etch-a-sketch << ArnIIe has made an online version of the kids favourite, Etch-a-sketch. He's also holding a little competition where you can submit your own pictures. We're rubbish. We can only make it draw cocks. Can you do better? http://www.arniie.com/sections/user/etch.php >> Pikey PC << "I'm on spring break this week.", writes Alex Stevenson, "I've been bored out of my mind and thought up a nice little project to keep me busy." Wow. You know that case modification stuff where nerds turn standard PCs into cool glowing boxes? This is better. This uses a cardboard box and looks absolutely crap. http://hlatlas.com/misc/tehbox.html ------------------------------------------------- : SITES IN BRIEF Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates. >> Monkeys! Disabled People! << George is a quadriplegic. Poor sod. He can't even play a CD. However, George has a friend, a helpful capuchin monkey who can even mop his brow. Watch this touching video. Er.. and try not to think whether their intimate relationship extends further. http://www.helpinghandsmonkeys.org/gizmo.mov >> Realdoll Sex Orgy << Yeah yeah. We've all seen the realdoll site with the scary latex sex dolls. But did you know that these products are actually a bit of a hit? And there's a thriving user community that discuss their usage and relationships with these dolls? This guy is clearly a Norman Bates in waiting. He's got 4 of the lovelies and er.. arranged them into a scene of a suburban lesbian orgy. http://www.dollalbum.com/php-cgi/gallery2/Mygirls >> Strange Album Art << Last week we featured albums that shouldn't be made. This week? We've found the covers. What a selection. Our favourite? This pre Brian Eno "Music to make automobiles by." http://www.showandtellmusic.com/pages/galleries/ga... >> "I ripped out my teeth with pliers" << Ouch! This silly lady fancies herself as an amateur dentist. The things people do on web cams eh? http://buggeroff.org/dental.html >> 24 hours of Porn << Most porn videos are returned to the shop with the tape stopped just a few minutes into the action. Grant Stoddard theorises that a man may only watch 24 hours of porn in his life. He decided to do it in one day. Read his story. http://www.nerve.com/regulars/ididitforscience/24h... >> Superman, First Issue << Someone has scanned in the first issue of the Superman comic from 1938. It's fascinating. Particularly the odd bits of period detail like the colouring in competition where you could win a whole $1. http://xroads.virginia.edu/~UG02/yeung/actioncomic... >> UK Family Tree << We think this is wicked. The people behind the famous friendsreunited website have a new thing. They're asking you to submit details about your family. What's in it for you? If enough people join in then we'll be able to find out how everybody in the UK is related to everyone else. Fascinating. How can we say this stronger? Go there. Submit your details. Send it to your family. We want this site to work. http://www.genesconnected.co.uk ------------------------------------------------- : B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE Results from the Euphemisms Challenge Each week we run a competition to test your creative skills. We set a challenge and you open Photoshop and mess with our heads. Last week we wanted euphemisms: http://b3ta.com/challenge/euphemisms/ We asked B3ta boarder 'Freddy Woo' to judge the entries - here are his 3 faves. Freddy writes - #1 "Wibbly Pig - for sheer rudeness & crudeness you can't go far wrong with this. (littlebean) http://b3ta.com/board/930158 #2 "Groovy furniture - one of the best images to use a random euphemism generator to wander off into la-la-land. (jadeviper) http://b3ta.com/board/921059 #3 "Mouse Wheel - I'll never scroll again without thinking about this one." (yidaho) http://b3ta.com/board/925029 >> This Weeks Challenge << This week, B3ta contributor 'Bovine' gave us the suggestion, "Seaside amusements" http://b3ta.com/challenge/amusements/ ------------------------------------------------- : WHAT HAPPENED NEXT? Follow-ups on previous stories. * DAVE GORMAN IS PISSED OFF - a while back we interviewed Mr Gorman - a UK comedian most famous for his TV programme where he searched for other people with the same name. He wants us to tell you to stop emailing him saying "I've found another Dave Gorman" Ok guys. His project is over. Stop it. http://b3ta.com/board/931230/ * MORE FREEBIES SENT IN - Amy Corbett from Five TV sent us a pre-release of a TV show called "Spider Attack" with the message "too scary to watch it all ..." * ERRATUM - Contrary to last weeks claim, Switzerland is not in Northern Europe. B3ta wishes to apologise unreservedly to this nation of cuckoo fucking Nazi collaborators. ------------------------------------------------- : STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE Make something cool and tell us about it. If you are in it then people will see your stuff. Things we'd really like to see include * EXPLODING HEAD MAN - why not tape fireworks to your head and walk round a shopping centre? * HUMILIATING YOUR MATES - why not record them singing in the shower? Or publish their dodgy teenage song writing? * MORE FREEBIES - we like getting stuff in the post. We especially like films, toys and music. And guns. Send contributions to http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/ BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't been featured then don't be put off - we look at everything you send us. ------------------------------------------------- Subscribe: [email protected] Unsubscribe: [email protected] ------------------------------------------------- THANKS: This issue was edited by Rob Manuel with apologies to David Stevenson. Stuff sent in by Daniel A. J, Madhat, Flibz, Tom Gregory, Fraser. Image challenge handled by Mike Trinder. Proofing by the b4ta bayowups. (61842) And Happy 40th Birthday on Sunday to Alasdair from Wales. His wife Lin says, "It would be a great birthday surprise if you could mention it." She also wrote something about sheep but we don't like to perpetuate national stereotypes. next issue » « previous issue Newsletter We run a free weekly B3TA email reporting on the coolest stuff on the net. _____________________ [ go ] -------------------- THIS WEEKS HEADLINES -------------------- * TYPE-IN MAGAZINE - LAUNCHED FOR YOUR FINGERS * AI SLOP - GET READY TO OINK FOR IT, PIGGIES * GET WELL SOON - WISHING WELL TO DAVE BAGPUSS READ LATEST ISSUE archive