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#Post#: 22332--------------------------------------------------
saving private shadders
DIR By: shaddersx113
Date: March 12, 2015, 10:08 am
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Hi All,
I have not been in the clan for very long and I am gradually
building up my friends list. So to all who I have played with
thank you for putting up with this aging limey and I look
forward to playing with anybody else if our time zones match up
with me here in the UK
Anyway Last night was very interesting, the platoon I ended up
with was a real mixed bag of characters. We had a barrel of
laughs with lots of mature innuendos flying around the chat
channel once we sorted out the game server, xbox live party
problems kicking people and deciding on the platoon leader.
The result of this I ended staying on a bit later than expected
and I am on my third espresso bomb (double shot, with condensed
milk, strong and sweet) at work to get through the working day.
:nerd:
I have now made It to lunchtime, it’s raining outside in western
UK and with my sorry looking sandwich from the 7-11 I thought I
give you last night battle report using some Hollywood poetic
licence to make you smile …. Enjoy.
Captain WotnoChad and private Shadders were down and out,
exhausted and were on a losing streak longer than the 26 game of
the 1976 Tampa Bay team. They had been fighting a string of
battles with defeat after defeat finally taking their toll. They
had found a quiet spot south of Lakeville to refit and make a
brew.
“Private Shadders, What’s our current mission status from HQ?”
called Captain WotnoChad.
Private Shadders popped his oil stained head out of the engine
compartment of his M4A3E8 trying to fix the oil leaks on its
mighty Ford GAA engine and called out “Sir, I am not sure if its
kill 3 Arty, base camp for the whole game, Detect 3 Germans
Tigers, spot a French tank driving backwards or give a speeding
ticket to ELC AMX for reckless driving, messages from HQ were a
bit scrambled“.
Captain Wotnochad took this information on board, the two
Sherman’s of his platoon had been running all night , beaten up
by nasty Russian t34’s and the dreaded Russian derp machine the
KV2. Where was his relief he had been promised some Ace tankers
form HQ to take the next objective and win he had been told they
were coming.
The peace of the clearing was shattered by the sound of 3
Sherman’s two with the words Fury painted on the barrel roaring
around the bend of the road bouncing to a halt in front of the
two parked tanks.
Three tankers climbed out of their tanks and saluted to Captain
Wotnochad. “Ace tankers reporting for duty”.
Private Shadders walked over to the Captain and pulled him to
one side and whispered “Sir that’s Mrzip98 the fastest rammer in
the clan, Bulletmunkie who’s shots are like lazer beams and well
Maddogsts he just Mad “ .
Captain Wotnochad nodded these were ace tankers. The platoon
formed up 5 Sherman’s roared out of the woods into battle.
The Abbey was on fire heavy fighting was around the key central
road. The platoon of Sherman’s put the metal to the floor and
headed west to try and perform a flanking attack up the valley.
The chatter was good natured over the coms link before the clash
of fighting machines.
“Contact 500m right “ called out BulletMunkie. The Shermans
responded blitzing the poor jagdpanzer in a coordinated volley
of shells on the move . Shadders screamed out “Arrrgh been
tracked watch out Arty”. Shadders repaired the track and
Shermans pushed on to keep Arty guessing. A couple of panzer 4’s
tried to halt the speeding tanks but were were swept aside like
chaff as the mad rush to reach the enemy base and flank was the
number one goal.
As the platoon rounded the final hill Shadders Sherman
disappeared into a fiery ball as a silent KV2 hiding in some
bushes landed a shell bang on the ammo rack. The four remaining
Sherman’s leaped forward to avenge the fallen tank and sent
shell after shell into the KV2 with many bouncing and a few
penetrations.
The KV sat between the platoon and the enemy flank absorbing
damage like a big sponge.
As shadders pulled himself out of the burning tank, he could see
why Maddog was called maddog. As the Shermans circled around
the lumbering KV maddog just rammed the poor Russian twice
before he was rewarded by the final death explosion of the KV.
the platoon swept down onto the enemy flank finishing of the
Arty and a lone TD . As the results came back a big cheer went
up over the com’s with everybody shouting “THE BEST GAME I EVER
HAD!”. “THE BEST GAME I EVER HAD!”. (plz see movie).
Anyway it sort of happened like that so thanks to all you guys
for the great time even if I was falling to asleep at my desk.
may see you tonight
Private shadders
#Post#: 22336--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: TKE919
Date: March 12, 2015, 10:32 am
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LOL! Nicely done.
:thumb:
Send me FR. I need to clean up my list a bit so should have
plenty of room. :grin:
#Post#: 22342--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: Maddog STS
Date: March 12, 2015, 11:11 am
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Martin, I haz tears I be laughing so hard LOL Well written, sir,
well written!
Thank you all for the games last night - was mucho FUN!
My repeated apologies for the server debacle :confused:
#Post#: 22434--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: xxxFumpsxxx
Date: March 13, 2015, 4:34 am
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That was ace.
Need more battle reports like that. I'm UK by the way so please
add me, I make a great bullet magnet lol
:salute:
#Post#: 22435--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: BulletMunkie
Date: March 13, 2015, 6:13 am
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Bally 'ell Perwivert Shadders, The guys in the office have all
been asking me what Iam upto, really laughing out aloud. Top
notch My ol' Ferwoot, please keep this style of Batrep coming.
trev
#Post#: 22457--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: shaddersx113
Date: March 13, 2015, 9:16 am
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Thank you guys for the comments i send fr's out but big sporting
weekend here in the uk with the rugby may be a bit under the
weather if the results are good and the amber fluid flows. I
hope chad can have a read i made him a captain !!!
Next outing private shadders maybe in a maltilda squadron.
If you read this chad start grinding :charge: for that maltilda
#Post#: 22461--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: Maddog STS
Date: March 13, 2015, 9:29 am
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To be from the UK and not have a Matty is like...is like...I
don't know what that's like! :scream:
#Post#: 22469--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: PreachingNut77
Date: March 13, 2015, 9:41 am
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No Matilda??? I do not understand.... Everyone should have a
Matilda... Its the law!!!!
#Post#: 22496--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: guest292
Date: March 13, 2015, 12:19 pm
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:nerd: private shadders, having just digested your battle
report I feel it's my obligation to forwards it to the The chaps
back at HQ for dissection/lessons learnt. The old boys,( major B
Munkey) and the rest of the " Bullington club" :superdrunk: will
I'm sure ponder the report and evaluate its weaker elements,
tuggin on parts until they unravel, in the hope that other such
platoons can impove there overall enthusiasm to NOT follow the
lemming train. (But I guess that's just the way of life when you
go out to play by yourself :scream:And I myself will try harder
to not get carried away and prove myself on the killing fields
by always moving beyond the " leeming line" :child: ( note to
self; just hang back like you do when lone wolfin wait, take
your time Captin Wotno.) any way chaps I am sure you will all
want to know I have just got myself a Matilda delivered to my
garage :beer: . Which means I can join in the "fun platoon" more
often. :charge:
the banter was spot on from all the chaps in the platoon, even
the good natured sarcasm had me smilin and drivin, whilst
thinking " the best job/game in the world".
Keep them reports comin private shadders. That an order!
:bigsmile:
#Post#: 22497--------------------------------------------------
Re: saving private shadders
DIR By: Knight of Annwn
Date: March 13, 2015, 12:22 pm
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A Matilda is required speed relief from driving your TOG... I
mean gadzooks.. to jump from Mighty TOG into Matty is like...
jumping from your Snail onto your Tortiose.. ahhh the sensation
of speed is exhilarating...addictive :palm: :rolf:
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