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#Post#: 3162--------------------------------------------------
[20] BEN
By: Zellaphone Date: October 13, 2022, 1:50 pm
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Ben was getting fed up with Rey, and he hoped that she was
getting to be fed up with him so that this could all end, but
according to her, she was still here because she enjoyed wasting
his time. She was a stubborn girl. After noticing that she
seemed to be starting to panic, he asked her to breathe, not
wanting her to genuinely freak out over all of this, but she
took his words as him patronizing her, telling him that he
didn't understand and asking him to stop. He assured her that he
would love to stop helping her, which clearly angered her more
since she snarled at him to fuck off, calling him by his last
name. Ben snapped back that she could fuck off first, also
referring to her by her surname since that is what she had done
to him. Apparently, however, that was the worst decision he had
made so far, and Rey suddenly appeared absolutely enraged with
him. She growled at him and glared, resembling a wild, angered
animal as she cursed and screamed at him, telling him to not
call her Plutt and declaring that wasn't her name. His eyes
widened, caught completely off guard by just how furious she was
at him for using what he knew to be her legal surname. She
threatened to shove him off the bleachers and beat him to a
bloody pulp if he ever did so again, and a chill shot up his
spine that felt like a mixture of genuine concern but also...
excitement? Was that normal? Should he really still be finding
her attractive as she threatened actual violence on him?
Probably not. “Fuck," he breathed, finding himself to be short
on words. He wanted to say something along the lines of I'd like
to see you try, but he wasn't dumb enough to not see that she
was obviously truly upset with him using her last name. Clearly,
there were some issues in her family, and he wasn't about to
disrespect that since he had a few issues with his own family.
Rey put her head in her hands after that, and Ben said nothing
for a few moments, giving them both some time to calm down and
recover after all of that. Eventually, he spoke up again,
getting back to her tutoring and explaining what each type of
poetry he had instructed her to write was. She agreed to write
them and got to work as he read a book that he had with him,
still holding onto some shock from Rey's outburst of rage. Maybe
today would finally be the day she'd quit tutoring despite what
she had said about wanting to waste his time. It wouldn't take a
detective to see that she hated him now. When she announced that
she was finished with her poems, he asked her to read her sonnet
first, his heart sinking as he realized as she read her poem
that she was writing about herself and how much she missed
London and felt like she didn't belong here. He understood what
it was like to not fit in, so he couldn't help but sympathize
with her slightly and feel guilty about how hard he had been on
her these past couple of weeks. She really needed some people in
her corner, it seemed... but it was too late for him to be that.
She hugged herself when she was finished reading her poem,
letting him know that she thought it was awful and didn't need
him insulting it. However, he didn't think the poem was bad at
all, and he let her know that, crossing his arms. Was it an
ametur-level poem? Sure, but that didn't mean it was shit. He
saved any other comments he had for later, wanting her to read
her ballad next. She agreed to do so, reading to him a poem
about... a boy who chased everyone away because of how awful he
was, and ended up alone because of it. Ben frowned and his gaze
narrowed as he listened to her read, thinking that the poem
could very well be about him. Although, maybe it wasn't. While
Rey clearly wasn't a fan of him at all now, she had never given
him the impression that she would so openly mock him for things
that could possibly be insecurities of his up to this point.
That would be bullying, which was something he always thought
that she might do, but she never had in front of him before.
Starting to get a bit angry, he asked her to read her limerick,
wanting to see if it would maybe confirm that she was writing
about him. She agreed to do so, but not without a reminder that
he had asked her, or rather had demanded that she do this. He
rolled his eyes, losing his patience. "Just read it," he
ordered, watching her with a furrowed brow as she told a
limerick about a man named Ben. So these last two poems were
about him. He clenched his fists, starting to tense as he
continued to listen to her limerick about him and about how he
acted like he was ten and was mean and cruel but thought that
was cool, which was why he didn't have any friends. By the end
of the limerick, Ben was done. Rey didn't know him. She didn't
know anything about him and yet she kept presuming to know him
and targeting his insecurities. Right when he had started to
think that this girl actually was just a nice, sweet girl who
would never hurt anyone, she had proved him wrong in one of the
worst ways possible. She was just openly, unabashedly mocking
him and bullying him now, just as so many others had done
before. She was no different than anyone. His first impression
of her had been right. “Fuck you," he snarled the moment she was
finished, baring his teeth to her. He was done dealing with her
and all of this. While he had been purposefully acting awful
around her to get her to go but still holding back and trying to
help, he was done with all that now. No more holding back, no
more helping. “Did you come to America just to be a problem, or
have you always been this way?” he asked her, his voice louder
than usual. “Everyone else might take pity on the poor little
lonely foreign girl, but you won’t see any of it from me," he
told her, pointing at her, himself, and then back to her, always
becoming more animated when he was upset. “You’re just a
pathetic, illiterate, intolerable girl who acts as though she
knows everyone when she actually knows nothing, and has her head
so far up in the clouds that she believes she can run back off
to live in London all alone on a toy store employee salary,” he
growled, not meaning everything he said, but not caring anymore.
He was angry now and Rey was sinking to his level of cruelty, so
why should he care about what he said or how it made her feel?
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#Post#: 3165--------------------------------------------------
REY [21]
By: winterssmary Date: October 14, 2022, 6:55 pm
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Ben didn't seem to heed Rey's warning, telling her to just read
her limerick. She was a little nervous about that, since he
already seemed rather displeased about the ballad she had
written. She didn't mention Ben by name in the poem, of course,
but she had written it about how she imagined his childhood
went. She didn't know his life and she was fully aware of that.
But, if he was anything like he was now when he was young, she
had no doubt that he chased people away from him with his
arrogance. But her limerick, he would find out, called him out
by name. But she knew it wasn't much to think about. Not really.
If Ben would have written a limerick at the moment, she was sure
it would have taken aim at her somehow. He would have either
called her lonely or pathetic or stupid. So she decided to point
out that Ben, himself, had no friends. Ben wasted no time in
cursing at her, snarling, obviously angry. Good. He spent this
whole time making her angry, getting worse and worse by the
minute. He deserved to have a taste of his own medicine for a
brief moment. "Did I touch a nerve? Now you see how it feels,"
she bit back. He asked if she moved to America just to be a
problem or if she was always like this. She tried to stiffen her
lip, but couldn't help how it trembled a bit at that. She hated
how he seemed to be able to call out everything that Simon did,
hated that it was so obvious to someone other than her abuser
that she was nothing more than a bother and burden. She ruined
everything she touched and people only tolerated her. They felt
sorry for her. She always thought Zach was lying when he said
that during their breakup, but she knew better now. Ben kept
poking at that fact, prodding at what a waste of space and drag
on the world that she was. He said that anyone else might take
pity on the poor foreign girl, but that he wouldn't be giving
her any. That was fine. She wasn't looking for sympathy. She
wanted someone to genuinely give a shit about her for the first
time in her life. But something told her that Ben wouldn't be
the person to do that either. When he pointed a finger at her,
she winced, cowering a bit, thinking this might be when he
finally hits her. He was so much more animated, his voice
raising and his arms moving much more largely than before.
However, she never felt a strike. She never felt his hand on her
face or anywhere else. Just the sting of his words: pathetic,
illiterate, intolerable. She'd heard all of these words before
and they never stopped hurting. She felt the heat pooling again
in her eyes, her hands shaking. He said that she knew nothing
and was stupid enough to think she could run away and live in
London on her meager salary. Her lip trembled much more fiercely
at that, unable to hide how much that hurt. He had a point. She
had to get back home. She couldn't stay here in America. She
didn't belong here. But how would she be able to afford a flat?
She didn't have to pay for school, but she still had to survive.
God, this was killing her. She was hopeless. "What is wrong with
you?" she asked, perhaps a little too loudly. She truly did see
her limerick as a usual jab, something he had done to her
several times, but more structured. Who did Ben think he was? "I
truly can't understand how someone can enjoy being as cruel to
people as you are," she added, her voice cracking, her heart
aching. She was just truly hurt by all of this, all of her
biggest flaws being brought to her attention. She was useless
and a leech, a burden to everyone she cared about, a pity
friend, completely stupid, and hopeless, beyond repair. She was
a lost cause and her life was a waste. Simon was right about
everything he said about her. "You have done nothing but pick
apart everything that hurts me and pour salt into the wound for
weeks," she pointed out, her hands shaking violently, her
breathing more labored. "And I tried to be nice to you. Hell, I
defended you when everyone told me that I was wasting my time
being nice to you," she admitted, her voice cracking once more
and a sob finally breaking through her words at the end of the
sentence. She couldn't stop the tears running down her face now,
the shallow breaths, the trembling of her lips and her hands,
the puffiness of her eyes. "There," she said, throwing her arms
up, referencing her tears. "Is this what you wanted? Are you
happy now?" she asked standing up, shoving her papers and her
binder and everything into her backpack. "School was supposed to
be my safe space and you've made it completely unbearable," she
admitted, finally saying aloud for the first time that he had
made coming to school a scary time for her. She was crying more
intensely now, tears streaming down her face, blurring her
vision. She didn't want to work and deal with abuse from
customers. Her only hope was that Simon was working late tonight
so that she would have a few hours of peace before he came home
and wrecked that for her. "I used to think that you were just
guarded and misunderstood, but I see you clearly now," she said,
feeling like an absolute idiot. "You're nothing more than a big,
angry bully," she said, hurrying off the bleachers, stumbling on
the way down for a moment, but regaining her footing. Then she
had to walk home, call out of work, and hide under a blanket
while she calmed down. [/center]
#Post#: 3166--------------------------------------------------
[21] BEN
By: Zellaphone Date: October 15, 2022, 10:04 pm
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Ben felt like absolute shit. He hadn't meant to make Rey cry, he
had just been angry, especially after that ballad and limerick
she had written about him. She had hurt him... but she had made
him realize how much he had hurt her. That day when he got home
and finished his homework, he had nothing else to do but think
about everything she had said as she had cried. She really
thought that he enjoyed being cruel to people, and had made a
safe space for her unbearable. She had, apparently, defended him
to her friends when all he had done was target her insecurities
and make her feel horrible, and for what? To free up one hour of
his week? Rey believed that he was a bully, the very thing he
had dealt with for years of his life. That wasn't what he wanted
to be. That wasn't what he wanted her to think of him. He had
thought that it was, but after she had gotten so upset and had
started shaking and sobbing, he realized that it wasn't. Yes,
Rey had said some hurtful things to him, but she was right when
she had pointed out that he had been nothing but terrible to
her. And yes, she had the wrong idea of him, but he had done
nothing to prove that. As much as he had wanted to get rid of
her, after hours of thinking about everything she had said and
what had happened the last tutoring session, he decided that
wasn't what he wanted at all anymore. Rey seemed like a good
person. He had tried not to believe that for weeks since just
about everyone had proved to him that they were awful, but he
felt as though he had to believe it now. She had tried to be
nice to him for weeks despite his constant negative comments and
attacks, and it had taken her so long to finally snap. Someone
who was naturally a bully wouldn't have taken so long to say
something mean to him. Fuck, he had really messed up. He should
have just trusted and helped her. Now everything was fucked up.
For fuck's sake, he had even told her that her friends were just
pity friends. Why the hell and he done that? Her friends had
just met her. Goddammit. By midnight that night, he had made the
decision that he needed to apologize to her at school. He wasn't
sure how that was going to go, but he couldn't just say nothing.
He didn't want Rey hating him. It didn't feel good at all, and
dammit, he liked her. So, the next day at school, he spent most
of his classes trying to figure out what the hell he was going
to say to her. He went through all sorts of different scenarios
in his mind, thinking of a million things he could say. It was
more difficult to do in the classes that they shared with one
another since he felt so ashamed with himself, but he eventually
decided that, since he didn't have work that day, he'd watch her
soccer practice and apologize after that. She'd maybe be in a
good mood then, and there wouldn't be as many people around. He
went to the football field where they also held soccer practice
and games after his civics class, taking a seat on the bleachers
where he and Rey usually sat for tutoring. It wasn't long until
the players came out and Ben spotted Rey, making his heart
flutter with nerves and from his crush. He still had no clue
what he was going to say to her, or if she was even going to
listen. He watched her practice, the cogs of his mind spinning
to try and think of how to approach her and what to say as she
scored goals and cheered on her teammates. God, she was so
perfect at everything she did... except maybe English, but that
was beside the point. How could he have ever made her cry? He
really was a cruel fucking bully. What else could he be other
than an idiot? She probably really, truly hated unlike anyone
else at the school. She probably never wanted to have to deal
with him ever again. He had no idea how to go about this. He
continued to watch her practice, starting to second-guess
himself more and more. He should have thought all of this
through more. He wasn't ready for this yet. He was just going to
fuck things up more, he was sure. His panic started to rise, and
before Rey was even finished with practice, he grabbed his
things and left the field, heading home instead. He had to
prepare more to apologize to Rey. If he said just one thing
wrong, he was sure she was going to slap him and tell him to
never even look at her again, and he didn't want that. He wanted
to get to know her. He wanted her to get to know him, and he
wanted to genuinely help her with English now because he knew he
could do it. He could make all of this right... and he could
possibly get a friend out of it, maybe. Maybe not, but he wanted
to try. He was fine with a lot of people at school hating him,
but he wasn't okay with Rey, someone who had tried to be his
friend, to hate him. By the next day, Ben still didn't feel
completely prepared, but he knew he couldn't wait much longer to
apologize to her. It needed to be today, especially since it was
supposed to be one of their tutoring days, and he had a bit of a
plan. He knew his parents would be home late tonight, if his dad
even came home at all. His mother had to be at her office to
deal with important city matters, and his father was working on
a big construction project that his boss was being a total ass
about. This meant that he'd have the apartment to himself, and
he had come up with the idea last night to invite Rey over for
tutoring and have some pizza. Was it a sure-fire way to make
things up to her? No, but he was hoping he could come up with
something good to say to her to really lead him into earning her
forgiveness. First though, he needed to let her know that he
needed to talk to her. He thought about passing her a note
during English since she sat so close, but he had ultimately
decided against it. At lunch, however, Hux reminded him that he
didn't have a whole lot of time left to say something to her
today. After another class, he figured that he should just try
to approach her after school before her friends met up with her.
Was it the best plan? Probably not, but winging most of his
apology seemed to be his only option now unless he wanted to
continue to drag this out. When the bell rang after Ben’s civics
class, he hurried into the hallways, going to the lockers where
he knew Rey would be. He spotted her, and his heart began to
beat faster. He still wasn’t quite sure how he was going to do
this. He knew what he wanted to say, but he didn’t know how to
say it, nor did he know that any of it would go over well. He
wouldn’t be surprised if Rey just decided to slap him in front
of everyone before he even opened his mouth, and he thought he’d
deserve that, honestly. He took a breath and approached her,
leaning against some of the lockers beside her. “Hey… uh, can we
talk?” he asked awkwardly, glancing at her and the floor. When
he got his answer, he continued. “Listen, um… fuck, I’m no good
at this,” he admitted, deciding that he should probably skip
having a bunch of build-up. He didn’t want Rey to just walk
away. “I’m sorry, okay? I never— I didn't mean to make you cry
the other day,” he told her, looking up at her and quieting his
voice towards the end so that no one else could overhear. He
didn’t want anyone else to know that she had cried, or that he
had been the one to make her that. “I just… I misjudged you, I
think, and I didn’t want anything to do with you because of it,”
he confessed. “That was shitty of me, and you were right about
me," he admitted, feeling guilty and ashamed. “I’m a cruel bully
who chases people away… but I think I fucked up chasing you
away," he told her hesitantly, afraid of what she was going to
end up saying. He had no idea what she'd want to give someone
like him a second chance, but maybe she was just that good of a
person. He had no way of knowing yet. “I want to keep tutoring
you, and really help you, so I was wondering… if you don’t have
work... do you want to come to my place today and have some
pizza? It would just be us, but, uh… yeah,” he asked awkwardly,
feeling like a total idiot. Rey was going to laugh at him. She
was going to laugh in his face and tell him to fuck off and
enjoy being lonely for the rest of his life, and he wouldn't
even be able to blame her.
((This probably sucks and it's out of order buerjljrvejl but
this was accidentally the one I started on last night))[/center]
#Post#: 3171--------------------------------------------------
REY [22]
By: winterssmary Date: October 18, 2022, 12:07 am
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Rey spent the rest of that afternoon underneath her blanket,
crying and shaking and thinking over everything that Ben said.
When something is repeated to you that many times, you
eventually begin to internalize everything. What Ben didn't know
was that Rey had been internalizing most of what he said for
years. Not the part about being the new foreign girl, of course,
but all the comments about her being stupid, useless, hopeless,
pitiful, and a burden. She didn't expect to have a big crash in
her mental health during the first month at her new school, but
America was full of surprises, she realized. Simon did end up
coming home late that night, which was lucky for her, as it gave
her more time to regain her composure and clean herself up
before getting dinner started. That night, as she lie awake in
bed, she contemplated skipping school the next day. She had
several classes with Ben and really didn't think she could see
his face while keeping her composure. But then she remembered
that she had football practice and wouldn't be able to play in
their upcoming first game if she missed too many practices.
Reluctantly, she awoke the next morning and went to school. All
of her friends could tell that something was wrong with her, but
she tried not to talk about it. She knew the way that people so
readily ousted Ben and alienated him. She didn't want anything
she said to her friends to lead to people dogpiling him instead,
even if he did deserve it a little bit. She did, however, tell
Finn that she didn't think she would continue her tutoring
sessions with Ben, but wouldn't explain why beyond feeling like
they were no longer helpful. She spent the entire day avoiding
even eye contact with Ben, ducking her head every time she saw
him, trying to hide from him, worried that he might continue his
assault. Or worse: get Hux involved. By the end of the day, she
felt safe going into football practice. Ben had to have gone
home for the day, right? But, after a few minutes into practice,
after they had done their warm ups and ran a few laps, she
looked out into the bleachers and saw him sitting there. She
instantly froze, only moving when someone bumped into her. She
tried to ignore him for as long as possible. Maybe he was just
there to smoke for a little bit before he inevitably left for
the day. But, the longer she was there, the more she realized
that he wasn't going anywhere. He was just sitting there,
staring her down as she tried to score goals and laugh with her
teammates. Eventually, when she glanced up, she realized that
Ben had left. But where the hell did he go? She'd be lying if
she said she wasn't nervous about this, worried. Did he come
here just to intimidate her? At the end of practice, she stayed
on the field for much longer than necessary, texting Finn and
asking if he would be willing to walk home with her. She was too
scared to walk on the streets on her own, just in case Ben was
waiting somewhere to ambush and yell at her. Luckily, Ben never
made a surprise appearance, but it didn't stop her from being
paranoid. God, he had this maniacal ability to induce nonstop
anxiety and paranoia in her. When she went to school the next
day, she found herself dodging him all the same. She was more
quiet than she had been in general, something that her friends
continued to take note of. However, they didn't push her too
much on it or interrogate her. By the end of the day, she was
planning on rushing out of the building and going home, being
off of work that afternoon. But she wouldn't get the chance,
apparently. She winced and gasped when she closed her locker to
find Ben on the other side, leaning against a few lockers beside
her own. She was not expecting that. He was acting nervous and
strange, suddenly awkward and uncomfortable, almost as if he had
been humbled. He asked if they could talk and, frankly, Rey
didn't feel that she had much of a choice. He sorta cornered
her. But, even if he hadn't, she couldn't help but feel for him
at how obviously unnerved he was by approaching her. She'd hear
him out, she supposed. Hesitantly, she nodded. Ben cursed,
saying he was no good at this. She quirked an eyebrow, but
allowed him time to speak regardless. She found that she was
hugging herself though, already nervous, worried that things
could go either really well or really poorly. Either way, she
had put herself in a vulnerable situation by giving him the
chance to say what he wanted. He apologized, she thought. Then,
his voice immediately dropped, wanting to keep it quiet that he
had made her cry the other day. She knew why he was keeping it
on the down low. Despite her friends being friends that only
chose to stay with her out of pity, they would come to her
defense if they knew that he nearly triggered a panic attack in
her. Especially since it was Ben. He insisted that he hadn't
meant to, finally looking at her. She let out a little sigh.
"Then what did you mean to do?" she asked, not punch or anger in
her voice. Just genuine curiosity. She couldn't think of another
possible goal that he might have had if not to make her cry. He
said that he simply misjudged her and that he wanted nothing to
do with her because of how he judged her. She shook her head
softly at that. "I- I don't understand. Did I... did I do
something when we first met to upset you?" she asked. She
thought she had done everything in her power to be friendly and
outgoing in the beginning. She tried to give him a chance even
when everyone chastised her for doing so. Had she slipped up
somewhere and not realized it? Ben said that it was shitty of
him, that she was right about him being a cruel bully who pushes
people away. However, it was when he said that he made a mistake
in pushing her away that she really began to feel something.
Maybe it was because he was just so attractive or maybe there
was something else to it, but she wanted to believe him. Her
heart felt a little warm and those obnoxious butterflies were
fluttering around in her stomach. God, she hated having a crush
on someone who mistreated her so much. She let out another sigh,
taking the time to look over his features, looking past the
obvious beauty she saw there and trying to see, instead of he
was being sincere or not. "Well, I've met plenty of bullies who
apologize... but, unlike a bully, you seem genuine. I think,"
she said, wanting to make sure she wasn't too trusting too fast.
That had been bad for her in the past. She nodded, almost as if
to say I forgive you. He spoke up again after a moment, saying
that he wanted to continue tutoring her and that he wanted to
genuinely help her. She smiled softly at that, not too big and
bright, wanting to keep it subtle in case this was a rouse. He
then asked, if she wasn't busy with her, to come over to his
house for tutoring tonight so that they could have some pizza.
Now that is how to make an apology, she thought. Ben didn't know
this yet, but Rey was an extremely forgiving person. Half of the
time food and an apology was enough. Sometimes, just the food.
She held up a finger. "On one condition: You're paying for the
pizza," she said, letting her little smile get just a tad wider,
nodding and accepting his invitation with a little laugh. "Also,
if this is some sort of practical joke -," she started, but she
stopped for a second. What was she going to do? Call the police?
Rat him out to their classmates so that the rest of his school
year was miserable? No, both of those were cruel. She'd never do
that. Realistically, if this was some sort of elaborate prank,
she wouldn't be able to do anything about it. But Ben would have
the satisfaction of having made her cry more than once. "Well,
please tell me this isn't some kind of practical joke. I... I
really can't deal with something like that right now," she
finished quietly. [/center]
#Post#: 3174--------------------------------------------------
[22] BEN
By: Zellaphone Date: October 18, 2022, 9:58 pm
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Ben felt like a dick for everything he had done to Rey, and
after a lot of thinking, he had come to the conclusion that he
needed to try and rectify his actions. It hadn't been right for
him to treat Rey so poorly and eventually make her cry all
because he thought she'd be like everyone else when it came to
him and hurt him somehow. He had been awful to her, and he
needed to make it right. At first, he thought about apologizing
to her after her soccer practice on Wednesday, but after
watching her practice from the bleachers, watching her score
goals and cheer on her teammates, he lost his nerve and left
before saying anything. He had no clue how to go about
apologizing to her, or if she'd even hear him out at all. He
wouldn't hear himself out after how terrible he had been. He'd
give himself a black eye... but perhaps Rey was a better person
than he was. She had proven that to be true so far, even if she
had written some bad poetry about him in which she had mocked
and teased him. However, as she had pointed out, she had only
done that since he had been bullying her from day one. He spent
more time trying to think about how he should apologize to Rey,
even considering asking his mother for advice before thinking
better of it. No one else needed to know about this. He just
needed to deal with this on his own, and he eventually decided
to try and invite Rey over for pizza as an extended form of
apology. His parents would be at their jobs Thursday night, and
he could apologize to her after school and invite her to his
home to tutor her there. Was it a crazy idea to invite the girl
he had a crush on to his home after making her cry? Maybe, but
he believed it was the best idea he had come up with yet. After
school on Thursday, Ben hurried to the lockers to catch Rey,
wanting to get to her before any of her friends. He found her
putting her books away and leaned against the lockers beside
her, waiting for her to finish what she was doing and close her
locker door before speaking to her. She gasped in surprise and
he asked her if they could talk, feeling pretty nervous.
However, after a moment, she nodded, allowing him to continue.
Already, he was off to an okay start. He tried to start going
through a more scripted apology that he had thought of the other
night but ended up scrapping that idea, cursing and admitting
that he was no good at this. She hugged herself and quirked a
brow, and he told her that he was sorry, quietly telling her
that he had never meant to make her cry, looking up at her. She
sighed, asking him what he had meant to do and he explained that
he had misjudged her and treated her wrongly because of that
judgment. She shook her head, saying that she didn't understand,
asking if she had done something when they had first met to
upset him. “N-no, but I just thought that— I mean, girls like
you are usually— I just don’t—“ he struggled, unable to find the
right words. “It’s… difficult for me to trust people," he said
finally, shoving his hands in his hoodie pocket. Almost everyone
that had ever been nice to him at some point had always changed
after a while. People bullied him, Snoke acted as though he had
adored him before abusing him, and his parents made it very
clear that he had been an accident. People just didn't like him,
it seemed, even if they sometimes tried to pretend. He
acknowledged that it had been shitty of him to treat Rey so
badly based on a judgment he had made, adding that she had been
right about him being a cruel bully who chased people away, but
he felt as though he had messed up chasing her away. She told
him that she had met plenty of bullies who made apologies, and
his heart started to sink at that before she added that, unlike
the others, he seemed genuine. "I am," he promised her, holding
onto the sliver of hope that she might forgive him. He told her
that he wanted to keep tutoring her but really help her, finally
inviting her over to his house for pizza, warning her that it
would just be them there. She was smiling now, which was a good
sign, he thought, but she held up a finger. He blinked, but she
said that she would come over on the one condition that he buy
the pizza. He managed a bit of a grin at that. He had already
been planning on paying for the pizza. "Done," he said, feeling
like he was being forgiven. Her smile widened and she laughed
before starting to warn him about if this was a partial joke,
cutting herself off for a moment. When she continued, she
pleaded with him to not let this be a joke, saying quietly that
she didn't feel like she could deal with that right now.
Quickly, he shook his head. "It's not a joke," he assured her.
"I'm being completely sincere, and I'll, uh, even drive you home
after tutoring if you really want to come over," he offered,
trying his best to be as nice as he could.[/center]
#Post#: 3177--------------------------------------------------
REY [23]
By: winterssmary Date: October 20, 2022, 1:09 am
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When Rey closed her locker door, she jumped at the sight of Ben
Solo standing there, leaning against the lockers next to her
own, watching her. It wasn't the first time she had caught him
hiding and staring at her. The day before, he had been casually
watching her at football practice, only to disappear halfway
through practice, scaring the life out of her. That was
apparently a habit of his. After she regained her composure, Ben
spoke hesitantly, asking if they could talk for a minute. She
wanted to just leave and find Finn or Poe or someone to hide
behind. Another part of her wanted to just stomp on his foot
after how he treated her. But it was the sincerity in his voice
that brought her back to reality. She didn't have to let her
guard down too much, but she could at least hear him out. She
nodded, giving him permission to proceed. He seemed to struggle
for words for a while, but she could be patient, even when she
didn't want to be. He eventually apologized to her, which was a
surprise. He insisted that he never meant to make her cry. She
asked what he had meant to do and he explained that he simply
misjudged her and that his poor judgment had lead him to
treating her badly. She shook her head, asking if she had done
something to offend him when they first met. Maybe that had
caused him to think the worst of her? But he shook his head,
insisting that it was nothing that she did. He said that he had
a specific idea about girls like her, which immediately caused
her to quirk a brow. What kind of girl was she? What kind of
girl did he think she was? And what gave him that impression?
But he scrapped the rest of that sentence, instead just saying
that he had a difficult time trusting people. After living in
foster homes and moving schools once or twice, that was
something Rey could relate to. Did it justify his behavior?
Absolutely not. But she could understand how fear can impact how
you treat others. "I can understand that," she granted. He
acknowledged his poor behavior and said that she was right to
say all those things about him, but that he felt he had made a
mistake by pushing her away. She confessed that he wasn't the
first bully who apologized to her, but that he was the first to
seem like he meant it. He insisted that he was being sincere
and, against her better judgment, she believed him. "Well, I
appreciate it. I really do," she said. Maybe he wasn't such a
bully after all. He said that he wanted to keep tutoring her and
that he wanted to take it more seriously and really help her. He
then offered for her to come over to his house today -- if she
wasn't working -- so that he could order pizza for the two of
them. She smiled softly, but held up a finger, warning him that
she had one condition: that he pay for the pizza. Frankly, she
couldn't afford one at the moment. And she didn't think it was
fair for her to pay for his apology dinner. He grinned,
accepting her condition. "Great. Then all is forgiven," she
assured him. She let out an uncomfortable laugh, beginning to
warn him about how she might react if this were all an elaborate
joke, but she stopped, just begging him to be serious and not be
joking. She couldn't handle being hurt right now. He shook his
head, promising that it wasn't a joke. He even offered to drive
her home after their tutoring session if she came over. "Well,
of course I'm coming over. I thought that was where we were
eating the pizza," she said, a light playful tone to her voice.
"And I would actually really appreciate the ride home. I'd
rather not walk home alone in the dark from a location I've
never been to before," she explained. [/center]
#Post#: 3180--------------------------------------------------
[23] BEN
By: Zellaphone Date: October 21, 2022, 12:06 am
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Ben was relieved when Rey gave him the opportunity to speak to
her, allowing him to do his best to apologize to her. He wanted
her off the bat that he was no good at such things but still
apologized, trying to explain that he hadn't meant to ever make
her cry. She questioned that, wondering what he had meant to do,
which was a fair question. He told her that he had misjudged
her, and had treated her wrongly because of it, which led her to
ask more questions. She wondered if she had said something wrong
the first time they had met, and he quickly assured her that she
hadn't, trying to explain where his false judgments of her had
come from. He attempted to explain that girls like her -- pretty
girls who were likely popular -- didn't usually get along with
guys like himself, but his words caught in his throat, causing
him to change what he was saying mid-sentence a few times while
Rey raised a brow before ultimately giving up and just admitting
that he had a hard time trusting people, which was really what
it all came down to. After the people that he had dealt with in
his life, it was really no wonder that he didn't trust people
that seemed to be nice to him at first. Usually, that sort of
thing didn't end well for him. Rey said that she understood,
which intrigued him. What reason did she have to not trust
people? What had happened to her? He wanted to know, but he also
figured now wasn't the time to ask such things. Rey hadn't
exactly forgiven him for how he had treated her yet, so asking
her personal questions likely wouldn't go over well. He just
nodded, saying that she had been right about him being a cruel
bully who chased people away, but he confessed that he thought
he made a mistake chasing her away. In response, she told him
that he wasn't the first bully to apologize to her, but that he
was the first to seem actually genuine. Quickly, he assured her
that he was genuine, desperate for her to believe him. He truly
was sorry for hurting her and he wanted to try and make things
right. She told him that she appreciated it, and while it still
wasn't an acceptance of his apology, he felt like he was onto
something. He told her that he wanted to continue tutoring her
but really help her, offering for her to come over to his house
today for tutoring and pizza, warning her that it would just be
the two of them. He hoped that wouldn't be a problem, but he
could see why she might end up thinking that it was. However,
she smiled at him, holding up a finger and telling him that she
would accept his offer on the condition that he paid for the
pizza. He allowed himself to grin at that, feeling rather
confident that she was forgiving him. He agreed to her terms,
having already been planning on buying the pizza anyway. She
seemed pleased with that, finally telling him that everything
was forgiven, which sent a wave of relief through him. He
nodded, smiling. "Thank you," he said quietly. Rey laughed
before starting to warn him about what she might do if this was
a practical joke, stopping herself before pleading with him for
it to not be a joke, confessing that she wouldn't be able to
handle it. His expression dropped at that and got more serious
again, promising her that it wasn't a joke and that he was being
entirely genuine. He could understand why Rey would think that
he might do something so cruel, but he wasn't going to be that
way with her anymore. He even added an offer of driving her home
after her visit to his place, if she really wanted to come over.
She assured him that she did, explaining that was where she
thought they were having pizza. He chuckled at that, unable to
help it. "And tutoring," he reminded her. She also said that
she'd appreciate the ride home, saying she'd rather not walk
home alone in the dark in an unfamiliar area. He nodded, knowing
the kind of creeps that could lurk on the streets of New York
City. "I'd rather you not either," he told her.
The drive to his home was a little awkward, to say the least.
Ben had never had a girl in his car before other than his
mother, and he had no clue what to say now that he and Rey were
practically starting over on better terms. He knew it was
probably only going to get worse once they got to the apartment.
He had never had a girl over before other than Jannah, who
didn't really count since she was his cousin and was technically
invited over by his parents along with his uncle, and he had
never had a girl in his room before... not that he assumed
they'd be going into his room. He couldn't be sure, though.
Maybe Rey would want to see his room, which was a slightly
nerve-wracking thought. What would she think of all his band
posters? What would she think of the playbills on his walls, or
his taxidermy butterflies, or his plants and his books? What
would she think of his sketches or his poems on his wall? Fuck,
would she think he was a sissy or something? He gripped the
steering wheel tightly as he drove, second-guessing his decision
to have Rey come over even though it was a bit too late now. He
pulled into his apartment's parking garage, nervously leading
her inside the apartment complex itself and to his door. He had
no idea how any of this was going to go. What if everything was
just super awkward? No, no, he would be fine, surely. After all,
he was going to be tutoring her for the majority of the time,
meaning he didn't have to think of things to talk about or
really entertain her in any way. Right? He unlocked the door to
the apartment, letting the door swing open before he turned on
the lights to the kitchen and the living room and tossed his
keys into the key bowl on the kitchen counter. "Um, so this is
it," he announced, closing the door behind Rey. “My parents work
late a lot, so you’ll luckily miss them," he assured her,
wanting her to know that she didn't have to worry about meeting
his family at any point today, certain that would be an award
experience, though it was proving to be a bit awkward being
alone with her. “Just, uh, make yourself at home and I’ll go
ahead and order the pizza," he told her, setting his backpack
down by the door before he heard a familiar shuffling coming
from his parent's room before Chewie came hurrying towards them,
his tail wagging happily. Ben's eyes lit up, having expected his
father to have taken Chewie with him to work today. He was glad
that he hadn't. There were few things in the world he loved more
than Chewie... if anything at all, really. "Hey, buddy," Ben
greeted the dog happily, crouching down and petting the fluffy
dog after he came up to him, still wagging his tail and panting
excitedly. "I missed you too, bud," he chuckled as Chewie licked
his cheek once before he noticed Rey, his tail wagging
increasing at the realization that there was a new person for
him to meet. Chewie rushed over to Rey, barking once and sitting
down as he beamed up for her, clearly ready for more pets. Ben
smiled. "This is Chewie," he said to Rey, already feeling less
awkward now that the dog was around. "He's my dad's dog," he
explained, though he always hated saying that. He wanted Chewie
to feel like his dog too, but his father was always taking him
to jobs with him and keeping him away from the apartment for
nights at a time. His dad loved doing just about everything with
Chewie, meaning Ben didn't get to see him as much as he liked,
nor did it feel like he had any say on where Chewie should stay
each day.[/center]
#Post#: 3183--------------------------------------------------
REY [24]
By: winterssmary Date: October 21, 2022, 8:42 pm
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It was a little uncomfortable being the car alone with Ben. Rey
felt like an animal in a trap, like she could be hurt at any
second. Of course, she wasn't. Ben wasn't going to hurt her. She
would have never gotten in the car with him if she legitimately
worried that she could get hurt. But it didn't make it any less
tense. It was made worse by the silence. She assumed Ben might
be the one to start talking, since this was his apology to her,
but he never did. Of course, he seemed to have issues with
social interaction anyway, so she didn't think he meant anything
by it. He just didn't know what to say and, frankly, neither did
she for the time being. Luckily, it was a short car ride. Ben
didn't like very far away from the school, but it was definitely
too far for Rey to want to walk by herself. He was also in a
pretty nice neighborhood, she noticed. The apartment complex he
lived in was way nicer than her own. It wasn't luxury, of
course, but that was fine. It was definitely at least an
upper-middle-class area. She felt a little out-of-place there,
but she had been out-of-place more than once. And nothing makes
you feel more isolated than being the foreign girl in a new
country. This would be fine. She grabbed her backpack once they
parked, slinging it over her shoulder as Ben lead her into the
doors and through the apartment complex, eventually to their
door. He introduced her to the place rather awkwardly, as if he
didn't know what do with his hands. Or his voice. Or his words.
However, Rey was surprised at how classy and how put-together
Ben's home was. She didn't know much about him, aside from Poe
really admiring his mother, but she expected things to be a
little more... messy. Something that implied that a teenage boy
lived there. "Oh wow. You live in a really nice place," she
said, looking over the kitchen and living room as she stepped
into the space. Ben said that his parents wouldn't be here,
since they usually worked late, saying that she would be lucky
not to meet them. She let out a little laugh. "Oh, don't be
silly. I quite like meeting friends' parents usually," she said
with a smile. "But, I think it would be especially fun in
America since I'm some sort of weird foreign girl and I can make
shit up and say it's a cultural thing and no one can stop me,"
she joked. In truth, she just liked meeting parents because it
did her heart good to see someone have loving parents. Assuming
the parents were loving, of course. Ben said that she should
make herself at home and that he would go ahead and order the
pizza. "Oh, alright. Uhm... are we going to be in the kitchen?
Living room?" she asked, following his lead and setting her
backpack down next to his own. After a moment, she heard some
rustling, as if someone was home. Then, the light padding of
quick footsteps. Definitely not human. A large, beautiful
Alaskan Malamute emerged from the hallway, his fluffy
brown-and-white coat giving him a friendly, almost plush
appearance. Rey gasped in delight, her eyes going wide and a
bright smile taking over her face. "You have a dog?!" she asked,
a rhetorical question, obviously. The dog wagged his tail,
trotting up to Ben to greet him. Ben, gently, almost sweetly,
knelt down to the ground to meet the dog, petting him happily,
greeting him and saying that he missed him too. It was... really
cute to see, admittedly. Rey loved nothing more than seeing
buff, attractive men be gentle and sweet with animals. And
children. The dog licked Ben's cheek before it caught sight of
Rey, the wagging of its tail getting more intense as he rushed
over to her. He barked up at her, sounding almost like an
excited greeting rather than a warning. Rey beamed, immediately
sitting down on the ground, content with the dog standing taller
than her. "Hi there, friend," she said brightly, petting him
without hesitation. He was so soft. His fur was a lot thicker
and more dense than she expected and it felt amazing on her
hand. And the dog seemed to respond well to her. Ben introduced
the dog to her, Chewie. "Oh, you're so beautiful, Chewie," she
said, giving him plenty of scratches behind the ear. "And such a
good boy and so sweet and fluffy," she said, giggling like a
school girl when Chewie licked her face. "Oh, you're just the
most perfect thing in the whole world, aren't you?" she asked,
grinning, kissing the dog back by pecking the top of his head.
Ben clarified that Chewie was his father's dog. "But he lives
with you, right? So he's basically your dog," she said, trying
to keep it playful and light. "Unless I try to sneak you home
with me tonight, baby," she said pointedly to Chewie, giggling.
She knew that was absurd, but she would make the joke either
way. "Sorry. I'm... I'm not allowed to have a pet, but I always
wanted a dog and I seem to revert to an overexcited
three-year-old every time I see one," she explained. [/center]
#Post#: 3186--------------------------------------------------
[24] BEN
By: Zellaphone Date: October 24, 2022, 1:10 am
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Ben hated the car ride to his house. He had no idea what to say
to Rey, and it didn't seem like she knew what to say either,
meaning that they spent the entire ride in silence. It was
incredibly awkward, but he thankfully didn't live too far away,
and he knew that once they were at his home, they could talk
about her tutoring. Would they have to deal with silence again
when he had to take her home? Sure, but he'd deal with that when
he had to deal with it. He parked the car at his apartment's
parking garage before leading Rey into the actual complex. He
took her to his door, fumbling with his keys for a moment and
opening it. He introduced her to his apartment, putting his keys
in the key bowl. He felt a little awkward having Rey in his
home, but at least most of the apartment felt more like his
parent's than his own. The only room she could really judge him
on was his own, but he didn't think they'd be going into his
room. Rey complimented the apartment, saying it was really nice.
He shrugged, not really seeing anything special about it. It was
just an apartment. “Thanks," he said, shutting the door behind
her. “My mom wants to move next year," he admitted, not sure how
he felt about that. She wanted to move to someplace nicer since
they could afford it, and somewhere closer to her office... but
he liked this apartment. He explained that his parents usually
both worked late, so she luckily wouldn't have to worry about
them. She laughed, saying that she actually liked meeting
friends' parents as if they were friends already just because he
had apologized to her less than an hour ago. She added that she
believed it would especially be fun meeting friends' parents in
America since she'd probably be viewed as the weird foreign girl
and could make things up and blame it on her culture. “I guess,
but they’re pretty used to Hux, and my cousin is from Camden, so
I think they’d disappoint," he warned her, not that he expected
her to meet his parents at any point unless they made tutoring
at his place an ongoing thing. He asked her to make herself
comfortable while he went ahead and ordered their pizza, setting
his backpack by the door. She asked if they were going to sit in
the kitchen or living room, and he shrugged. “Anywhere you want,
though the living room’s more comfortable. There’s my room too,”
he offered, thinking that she'd definitely turn him down on
sitting in his room, even though it was an option. It was then
that Ben heard a familiar rustling coming from his parent's room
and his face lit up, hearing Chewie's paws against the hardwood
floors as he came trotting towards him, his tail wagging. Rey
gasped, sounding thrilled as she questioned him about having a
dog. He smiled, crouching down and petting Chewie as he greeted
him happily. Chewie licked his cheek in response and Ben
chuckled, assuring the dog that he had missed him as well. He
always missed Chewie, and he had fully expected his father to
have taken him with him for the night, but he was glad to see
that he had been wrong. Chewie noticed Rey, his tail wagging
more at the sight of a potential new friend. He rushed over to
her, barking and sitting down, waiting patiently for pets. Rey
greeted Chewie, calling him friend, which made Ben grin. She
seemed to like dogs, which was something that was important to
him... not that it really mattered. Rey wasn't his girlfriend or
anything. He introduced her to Chewie, and Rey called him
beautiful, scratching behind the dog's ears and making Ben's
grin widen and soften. She added that Chewie was a good boy too,
as well as sweet and fluffy, speaking directly to the dog.
Chewie looked thrilled, licking Rey's face and causing her to
let out a giggle that sounded like music to his ears. Fuck, she
seemed to perfect. She asked Chewie if he was the most perfect
thing in the world, acting as if she wanted confirmation even
though they both knew she was talking to a dog. She kissed the
top of Chewie's head and Ben's heart melted, thinking that the
way she was interacting with Chewie was very, very sweet.
Everything about her was just so sweet, dammit. He explained to
her that Chewie was his father's dog, but Rey pointed out that
he lived with him, so she believed that basically made him his
dog as well. She then added that Chewie was his unless she tried
to sneak him home with her tonight. “I don’t think that would go
over well," he said with a slight chuckle. He would definitely
not allow that. “My dad hardly lets him out of his sight unless
I decide to take him for a walk," he explained, trying to make
it a little more clear as to why he thought that Chewie was his
dad's dog even though he wished he was his. Rey then apologized,
saying that she wasn't allowed to have a pet, which was
unfortunate for someone who seemed so enthusiastic about Chewie.
She told him that she had always wanted one and reverted back
into a three-year-old whenever she saw a dog. "It's fine, weird
girl," he told her casually, understanding. He loved dogs too.
"Chewie, go lay down," he instructed the dog, knowing that they
needed to start Rey's tutoring. Chewie looked at him before
going into the living room and laying down beside the couch on
his dog bed. "Good boy," he said while pulling out his phone,
looking back at Rey. "So what do you want on the pizza?" he
asked.[/center]
#Post#: 3189--------------------------------------------------
REY [25]
By: winterssmary Date: October 24, 2022, 5:21 pm
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It was impossible to pretend that the car ride to Ben's
apartment was comfortable. It was the complete opposite. She
found herself stiff the whole time, staring out the window to
avoid potentially making eye-contact with Ben, who seemed
equally uncomfortable and freaked out by the whole situation.
His social ineptitude was becoming more and more obvious by the
moment, but Rey wouldn't pester him about it. If he was
naturally more reserved, that was fine. She just hoped that she
wasn't making him uncomfortable. They arrived at his apartment
complex after a short drive, Rey finding herself completely
floored by how nice of a neighborhood she lived in. Her flat
with Simon wasn't terrible, but it certainly wasn't a
family-friendly environment. Ben lead her out of the parking
garage and into the building itself, eventually opening his door
for her and introducing his home to her. She complimented the
place, being genuine when she talked about how nice it was. It
wasn't luxurious, but it was relatively upscale, definitely a
comfortable family home. He thanked her sheepishly, adding that
his mother intended to move them next year. She quirked a brow
at that. "Oh. Really? I mean, I guess that's fair. I just... I
dunno. It seems cozy here. And you don't have a meth lab next
door, based on the smell of it," she said, trying to keep it
light. In actuality, Ben didn't sound happy about the idea of
moving, should it come to that. But she didn't know him well
enough to begin unpacking any of that. He assured her that his
parents were working late, so she would be lucky enough to avoid
meeting them. She said that she enjoyed meeting her friends'
parents, saying that American parents in particular would be fun
to play with, since she could use the British excuse. Ben
pointed out that Hux -- his best friend -- was British. And,
apparently, he had a cousin from Camden, so her little tricks
wouldn't work. She was genuinely surprised at that, but played
up the jokes regardless, wanting to keep the tone light while
they established a good banter. She did a little fake pout,
snapping her fingers in exaggerated disappointment. "Fuck.
That's a good point. I forgot about Hux. And I definitely didn't
know you had a cousin from Camden," she said, shrugging it off.
She still liked the meet parents, especially the loving kind.
She liked for them to temporarily fill that void throughout a
visit. Zach's parents loved her back in England. He asked her to
make herself comfortable, saying he would be ordering the pizza
in a minute. She asked where they would be, but he didn't seem
to care one way or another. He pointed out that the living room
was more comfortable, but added -- probably without thinking --
that his room was an option. She would by lying if she said she
wasn't curious. She genuinely wanted to get to know Ben better
and, given that he had lived here for a while, she could
probably learn a lot about him by how his room was designed.
"Oh, then yeah. Probably the living room," she said. "But, you
know, since you're offering a tour, it would be kinda cool to
see your room," she said. "Just to satisfy my odd curiosity,"
she added afterward. She wanted to see if he even bothered
decorating, if it was as dark as she imagined it might be. She
wanted to see what he liked and disliked. She wanted to see if
he had any family pictures or even pictures of these other
friends that he had alluded to in the past. Was he sentimental
or did he care too much about style? Just then, they heard the
shuffling of feet, followed by the quick pattering of... a dog
walking in? Rey perked up at the sight of a beautiful, fluffy
Alaskan Malamute with chocolate brown markings. He immediately
rushed over to Ben, recognizing his owner immediately and being
met with Ben's charming smile, his hands eagerly and gently
petting the dog. It was sweet seeing Ben interact so softly with
the animal, seeing how much he seemed to genuinely love his dog.
On top of that, Rey couldn't hide her excitement at the fact
that there was a dog here. Period. Ben introduced them,
announcing that the dog was named Chewie and that he was his
father's dog, technically. Chewie rushed over to her afterward,
excited at the prospect of a new person. His bark caused Rey to
giggle as she collapsed to the ground to begin petting him,
telling Chewie that he was beautiful, a good boy, and that he
was simply perfect. She scratched him behind the ears, ruffled
the fur of his neck, and kissed the top of his head. She assured
Ben that, since they lived together, Chewie was kind of his
dog, so long as she didn't steal him that night. Ben chuckled,
saying it wouldn't go over well. Apparently, Ben's father rarely
ever left Chewie behind, only letting him out of his sight when
Ben walked him. Rey smiled, but shrugged it off. She would never
actually steal a dog, no matter how badly she wanted one. "Well,
to be fair, Simon would have my head if I brought home an animal
anyway," she pointed out. She apologized, explaining that she
wasn't allowed to have a pet, but that she had always wanted one
and just over a little too excited whenever she was around a
dog. He said it was fine, calling her weird girl, as he had done
one other time. She couldn't help the little chortle at that
nickname, but she found that she was fine with it. He obviously
wasn't being insulting. He gave a command to Chewie, asking him
to lay down. Without hesitation, the dog obeyed, demonstrating
that he was well-trained and loved Ben. He settled down
comfortably in his large dog bed by the couch. Rey grinned,
giving the dog a little wave goodbye before getting back to her
feet. Ben asked what she wanted on the pizza, taking out his
phone. "Oh... uhm... I'm happy with pretty much anything. Can we
do, like, pepperoni and olives?" she asked, shrugging. [/center]
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