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#Post#: 5137--------------------------------------------------
Not much happening on here --- SO
DIR By: Winger14
Date: April 12, 2020, 1:10 pm
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My neighbour was banging on my door at 2:30am this morning, can
you believe it 2:30am ?. It's a good job I was still up
practicing on my Bagpipes or I'd have been well Pee'd off.
I've just had a letter back from Screwfix. They said they
regretted to inform me that they're not actually a Dating
Agency.
My Girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker, Well, she's not exactly
my Girlfriend yet.
I saw a Poor old lady fall over in the street today, so I went
to help her, well I presumed that she was Poor as she only had
£1:20 in her purse.
Doctor's have just identified a food that can cause you grief
and suffering, years after you've eaten it.
It's called Wedding Cake.
I was in the Pub with my Wife last night and I said "I Love You.
She said "is that you or the Beer talking". I replied " it's
me talking to the Beer".
The Wife has been missing for over a week now. The Police came
round and said that I should prepare for the worst. So I've
just been round to the Charity Shop to get all her clothes back.
Hi mate, I don't want you to panic but I'm texting you from the
Casualty. It turns out that the new Dysons Ball Cleaner isn't
what I thought it was.
The Grim Reaper came for me last night, but I managed to beat
him off with a Vacuum Cleaner. Bloody Hell, talk about Dyson
with death.
A man walked into a pub in Wales and ordered a White Wine
Spritzer, the whole bar went silent as everyone stared at him.
You sound English said the barman, where do you come from. I'm
from back across the Severn, replied the man. And what do you
do back across the Severn. I'm a Taxidermist says the man.
What does one of them do, asks the barman. I mount animals was
the reply. It's alright shouts the barman, he,s one of us.
#Post#: 5138--------------------------------------------------
Re: Not much happening on here --- SO
DIR By: Boxy10
Date: April 12, 2020, 5:59 pm
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Thanks Winger, you've just supplied me with all the material I
need for my next stand up!!
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