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       #Post#: 20059--------------------------------------------------
       Our system is broken
       By: trollslayer Date: July 30, 2015, 11:09 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       To make a long story short, my wife and myself, after supporting
       our grand daughter for the last year or so went to court and got
       permanent guardianship of her.  The reasons for this are many
       and I won't go into them right now.  My step son has been paying
       court ordered child support for most of her five years of life.
       Her mom has benefited greatly even though she wasn't providing
       her shelter or meeting her day to day needs.  We aren't seeking
       any kind of support from either of the parents.  The order for
       guardianship has been in place for almost a month now.  I
       contacted the social services to let them know that the
       guardianship order is in place, gave them the case number and
       that any payments to my grand daughters mom should cease
       immediately, as well as payments from her dad.  The result is,
       my step son must petition the court to get the child support
       order modified.  I find myself asking the question, WTF!!!!
       Neither parent is responsible for the child anymore but one
       still has to pay child support to the other?  Now you have to
       pay additional funding to the courts to get this order changed?
       Why wouldn't the guardianship automatically change that?  Or why
       wouldn't the money taken for child support automatically be
       forwarded to the guardian that has full custody?  There.  Rant
       done.  Needless to say I'm pi$$ed of at the entire system and
       I'm looking for changes to be made ASAP.  I'm debating who to
       contact next.
       #Post#: 20061--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: Mr.steve Date: July 30, 2015, 11:26 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Go to child support agency and get the paperwork for
       modification. Fill it out and send it to the family court
       commissioner who should sign it with out delay and at NO COST.
       A lot of red tape and a few hoops but trust me, it will all work
       out.
       #Post#: 20063--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: trollslayer Date: July 30, 2015, 5:44 pm
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       [quote author=Mr.steve link=topic=1458.msg20061#msg20061
       date=1438273564]
       Go to child support agency and get the paperwork for
       modification. Fill it out and send it to the family court
       commissioner who should sign it with out delay and at NO COST.
       A lot of red tape and a few hoops but trust me, it will all work
       out.
       [/quote]
       Despite the fact I'm the guardian, I'm unable to do that.  If I
       were to go to court or to social services for some kind of
       benefits (food stamps, badgercare, child support) I could.  I
       don't want anything from either parent and am in fact quite
       disgusted by both of them.  If my stepson is dumb enough to
       continue to pay child support to a mother who doesn't have
       custody of his daughter I gues it's his problem.  The redundancy
       built into our system disgusts me even more.  Being a sperm
       donor and a payor of child support doesn't make you a father any
       more than having a uterus and receiving child support makes you
       a mother!
       #Post#: 20068--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: Mr.steve Date: July 30, 2015, 9:53 pm
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       I guess I should have said that your step son should go to child
       support.......( sorry  ;)  )
       #Post#: 20069--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: rapids_60 Date: July 30, 2015, 11:29 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Dealing with government and the legal system is nothing if not
       frustrating.  There is no logic or common sense, only inflexible
       rules.
       Hats off to you and your wife for stepping up.  Your
       granddaughter is most fortunate to have the two of you.
       #Post#: 20075--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: 2fat Date: July 31, 2015, 8:44 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=rapids_60 link=topic=1458.msg20069#msg20069
       date=1438316973]
       Hats off to you and your wife for stepping up.  Your
       granddaughter is most fortunate to have the two of you.
       [/quote]
       and that is the bottom line!!
       #Post#: 20077--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: Linda Lou Date: July 31, 2015, 4:12 pm
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       You and your wife are good people Trolley.
       #Post#: 20080--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: trollslayer Date: July 31, 2015, 11:18 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Thanks Linda.  I don't like to look at it that way.  Sometimes
       you just do what you gotta do.  My grand daughter has been my
       best little buddy for the past five years.  Hard as this may be
       to admit, I have a stronger bond with her than I've had with my
       kids or my step kids.  Don't go all crazy on me but this is the
       way I look at it.  I screwed up with my kids, got a little, (and
       I mean a little) better with my step kids.  Now God has given me
       a third chance to get it right.  I think I may almost have it
       down by now.  Have you ever gone to bed with your child and sang
       them to sleep singing You Are My Sunshine, or Jesus Loves Me?
       It's hard to say who enjoys it more.  Right now it's me and her
       at the campsite and it's time to warm up the ole vocal cords
       #Post#: 20119--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: trollslayer Date: August 4, 2015, 7:15 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I've always said, that after years of playing on the internet,
       there is very little that can get under my skin, and that holds
       true today.  But today, I found that one post on Facebook that
       truly made me p o'd
       [quote]Jenna XXXXXX
       8 hrs · Timehop ·
       Hard to believe I'll be the mom of a 6 year old tomorrow. So
       excited to spend her special day with her and her sister at the
       zoo tomorrow.[/quote]
       Tomorrow is my baby's sixth birthday.  I'm generous enough to
       allow her to spend it with her mom and her sister because I feel
       I'm looking out for my baby's best interest.  But I find myself
       asking, how do you give up both of your kids, pay no support to
       either, see both when it's convenient to you, and possibly call
       yourself a "mom".???   ??? ???  HTF do you do that?  Some people
       have no morals, no scruples and no conscience.
       #Post#: 20120--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Our system is broken
       By: Linda Lou Date: August 4, 2015, 7:27 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       She's NOT a mom. She was an incubator for a child that you are
       raising.
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