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#Post#: 69--------------------------------------------------
Hello, Bonjour!
By: Veronica Date: April 25, 2014, 11:46 am
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I am happy to introduce myself,
I have always been a seeker of truth.
I am a Theatre Artist, community arts co-ordinator, and
"activist" regarding monetary reform, economic/ecological
justice, Indigenous issues, and democratic reform.
The story that details how I found Jesus and Mary living their
passion is ripe for telling and relates to my passions for
truth, justice and God's way of loving IN the world.
In 2011 the Occupy movement sprouted up all over the world. I
took part in a 40 day encampment at St. James Park in Toronto.
~I had always been attracted to the teachings of Jesus as I knew
them from the dominant Christian culture that I live in. Having
been raised in a house void of religiosity I learned from and
experimented with whatever LoA brought my way. I used to say
that Buddha taught me how to be present and Jesus taught me how
to be present in the world. My mom's regular response to my
spiritual musings and questions was "It's between you and God".
I appreciate the guidance in building a personal relationship
with Our Father. She called out my arrogance enough for me to
really feel it and although I still have some in my soul-I'm
sensitive to it & much more humble than I might have been.~
So during that 40 day social and cultural experiment that was
the Occupy camp at St. James I saw dozens of "yeshuas" some
"marys" and an "elijah", a 'john', etc. There was A LOT of
spirit influence. Diverse spiritual expressions and
experiences....I felt the truth of living out The Story
everyday. We were in a space "outside of time". The truth of
LoA was accepted and promoted. The truth about the humyn family
was practiced and for many it was the first time they had ever
experienced brotherly and sisterly love so consciously. I can't
idealize the experience- especially now that I have more
awareness and sensitivity to spirit influence. I can discuss
the details as well as problems and practical issues about the
movement in Toronto at length and I would enjoy answering
questions about that stuff in a different thread :)
So by the time we were evicted and peacefully dismantling the
encampment I had become close with someone who - in our
interactions - made me question my own identity. I was
questioning if I was Mary Magdalene. After a couple weeks of
gypsy style roaming in the city with my new "crew" I had left my
common law marriage of roughly 7 years, found a new place to
live and was alone in my new space without much more than a
couple sleeping mats, blankets, a computer and office supplies.
I had the time and the space to actually investigate myself
regarding this new question I had about my identity. On the
first night of true prayerful investigation I googled "Mary
Magdalene, Truth" and I was SO relieved to find the TRUTH so
quickly.
I really can't describe that feeling- the kind of feeling that
inspires hymns that are beautiful beyond my understanding. Leap
of faith! I spent the end of 2011 and the very beginning of
2012 watching a lot of videos and experimenting. 2012 was out
of this world. lol. I faced the truth about the abortions I had.
I was baptized at St. James Cathedral (Where the occupy camp
had been) It was a beautiful ceremony that I embarked with
awareness of Yeshua and Mary, alive and well and living in
Australia(!) and I felt compelled to mark the shift in how I was
relating to God, from suspicious curiosity to humility and
commitment. (I was never a believer of the Trinity Doctrine, or
the "sacrifice" FYI) At that time I had only experienced a
small taste of Divine Love. There was still a lot of spirit
influence on myself and my partner, especially by groups of
church women who were really invested in the continuation of the
institution. By the end of the year I was really focused on
spotting and healing the emotions that enabled the influence and
I was able to release the hooks the church women group had in
me.
~I continue to participate in some ceremony (not the Eucharist
much anymore...still have some stuff to resolve there...another
great topic for another thread!) I am much more aware of, and
resolving my addictions regarding pomp and pageantry, shared
experiences and being seen as "ahead of our time" among other
things, because of my interactions with the people and the
practices of the institution. There is a lot of exciting
exchanges and learning going on, facilitated by the space and
intentions of the clergy at parishes I am involved with.~
2013 I was confronted again and again in how I was not committed
to loving myself, how I was still in facade, how I was still
TERRIFIED.
I also began in October to resolve my feelings regarding
identity of Jesus and Mary. It's amazing how a few prayers and
a couple dreams moved me from a mix of demands, expectation,
caution and fear, to acceptance, faith and non-attachment. I am
overwhelmed with gratitude for how they follow their desires,
share their passion and how that has changed my life. Rejoice!
My emotions about it may not be "resolved" but I am in more
truth- and better loving when I think & feel about them. As I
come to better know Our Mother, I see them more clearly, I
better understand the teachings from the bible accounts that
always resonated with me and I better practice the teachings
they offer now.
This year I have been much much much more real with myself.
Relationship ending, maturely with respect; turning 30 and
facing a lot of emotions about time, age, image, rage at the
world systems, gender stuff and opening the soul mate part of my
soul....that last one is very uncomfortable at this time. ugh.
Two months ago in a prayer asking God what the biggest block for
me to feel through to better connect with Him- the immediate and
overwhelming response was Soulmate Facade, I gave in to the
feelings and so a lot has been changing, fast- Thank God.
To conclude; I just did an experimental showcase last night as
part of the community arts programming I facilitate at St.
Stephen-in-the fields, an amazing space in artful Kensington
Market. The message "choose to walk the labyrinth of the Soul"
and "face the darkness within" "become a vessel of the Creator's
Love"was very well received. I love Theatre, Music, Dance and
I'm receiving a guitar to learn on next week!
if you really want to know more follow these links;
HTML http://oneveronica.wordpress.com
(My NEW blog)
HTML https://www.facebook.com/events/185234695016404/?ref=29&ref_notif_type=like&source=1<br
/>
(The Arts programming FB EVENT PAGE ~ at St. Stephen's )
www.toronotseedlibrary.org
www.comer.org (we have filed a law suit against the government.
In short; to remove the private bank's power in money creation
through debt as it relates to government spending. This group
has been a source of a lot of learning and some interesting
conflict- old people and the internet! EEK! lol)
www.youthvote.ca (A new venture to improve democracy in a
positive way; Launching next month)
Ask me anything :)
Love,
your sister,
Veronica
#Post#: 71--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: pierrejoseph Date: April 25, 2014, 8:12 pm
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O God, I loved to read your story. Thank you. It is so heart
filling and opening. :'( It is so inspiring to read and relate
to other people stories about how they got to DT and their
passion and blocks to God.... Would love to discover your
(he)art. Art inspired by God and His angels is so heart opening
to me....Thank you.
#Post#: 74--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: Veronica Date: April 25, 2014, 11:13 pm
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I completely agree Pierrejoseph, our stories are so powerful.
Looking forward to getting to know you too! I'll definitely
share some of my work on this forum soon, just need to reformat
some pictures :) I'm in a highly productive phase after a long,
deep freeze of a winter.
#Post#: 76--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: pierrejoseph Date: April 26, 2014, 1:50 am
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Wonderful, thank you Veronica. Hope you succeed in unfreezing...
:)
#Post#: 81--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: Victoria7 Date: April 26, 2014, 7:48 am
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Hey Veronia,
Thank you for sharing your story. Was just wondering why you
felt you were Mary Magdalene...ie what emotions or memories did
you have? spirit influence?
xx
#Post#: 86--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: Veronica Date: April 26, 2014, 4:09 pm
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That is an important question, Victoria.
To be clear- I thought I MIGHT be. I never did believe that I
was. I was in a state of discernment, and open to a lot of
metaphysical philosophy regarding the individual soul & "christ
consciousness".
I was open to considering that one individual soul could grow so
much it eventually separated again - to "reincarnate" into a
number of people> that was the predominant concept that allowed
for the question of my identity in relationship to Mary. I also
used to believe that reincarnation happened more frequently and
in a diversity of ways.
Some of the feelings I can identify that got me to that place
are as follows;
Feeling Special & important
a desire to lead
feeling "old" "old soul"
arrogance
a desire to correct the world's systems & institutions-
especially the church
addicted to being treated like a queen
a desire to balance the feminine and masculine
a desire to bring forth the "New Jerusalem"
a feeling that The Kingdom lives in our hearts
addictions to feeling listened to
addictions to feeling "worshiped"
addictions to feeling "further along" or "more developed" than
others
addictions to giving advice- and being other's "rock"
Feeling like I had been "courted" by "Jesus"- but I never wanted
to be a nun.
The list could go on, getting into all the shades of grey- the
dominant ones are there ^
I'm still working through some of those addictions and feelings.
Specifically regarding the Queen and worship stuff... For the
last 10 years or so I have had a lot of spirit influence that
I've still yet to fully clear which has "fed" these addictive
feelings. Dreams, fantasies as well as "real time"
interactions" that keep "egging on" the "Queen inside me".
Last year I was able to better identify the group of women
spirits who were hooked into those emotions and the worshipping
dreams and fantasies stopped. I wish I could accurately express
what a relief it was to learn about spirit influence, the sleep
state, emotional injuries and past matriarchal societies to the
point that I was able to actually heal & grow in love so much
that those unloving thoughts, dreams and desires have stopped.
I haven't discussed this thoroughly until now- this Forum seems
like a good place to get into the details with "like
minded/hearted" people. I feel a twinge of fear about how I
might be shamed for how arrogant I was...still am- I can't say I
wouldn't love to be the Queen of Canada, I have a list of
proclamations I would make right away! lol. Thankfully the
desire to be worshiped has definitely been healed. Glory to God.
#Post#: 91--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: pierrejoseph Date: April 26, 2014, 5:44 pm
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Thanks for sharing Veronica, it is helpful to read your
response. I can identify to most of your addictions and spirit
influence I have been under, feeling I was the apostle Pierre
when I was young, then apostle John, pharahos ...and taking many
spirit(ual) names to avoid the pain of who I really am...I had
to face my addictions to see the truth of it, and start not
feeding them to challenge the spirit influence until they left
resigned...or I should say I did not desire their presence
anymore to make me feel better... But I know i have still other
spirits around me that make me feel better, or I should rather
say they help me to avoid my pain. It is still an issue.
When I had one of my first conversations with Jesus, he started
by telling me he desires to call me by my real name, Pierre. At
that time, I was quite well overclocked and my spiritual
teacher's name was Amael ???
#Post#: 94--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: Veronica Date: April 26, 2014, 10:28 pm
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Pierre,
Did you take on the name of a guru? How long did you maintain
that?
So often I see friends hiding behind their "spiritual identity"
a self- concept that is not authentic. One of my most valued
lessons I've learned on the path is non-avoidance/humility.
#Post#: 95--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: pierrejoseph Date: April 27, 2014, 1:29 am
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No, I just wanted to be special, to be spiritual, to feel
better, to be a better person and most of the addictions you
already listed above, and I was so easily influenced by my
(overclocked guru) teacher of that moment to open to a higher
vibration of myself, my higher self. I was praying to get my new
names more in alignment with my supposedly improved condition
and I got them from spirits and sometimes through people I don't
know starting to call me with different names and I would
recognize them as the ones I was asking for. My spirituality was
just another facade to avoid feeling my pain and hopelesness.
Very damaging indeed.
#Post#: 98--------------------------------------------------
Re: Hello, Bonjour!
By: Victoria7 Date: April 27, 2014, 7:44 am
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Thanks for that reply Veronica. Really interesting and very
honest! Xx
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