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#Post#: 287012--------------------------------------------------
The All Encompassing Thread of Thoughts!
DIR By: simpletwistupdon
Date: March 6, 2026, 11:07 am
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A comprehensive list of all the Thoughts that have been
documented over the history of the band.
2001
09-04:
Thought 1: "Why does Catsup & Ketchup spell the same thing?"
Thought 2: "Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?"
09-05:
Thought 1: "What is another word for synonym?"
Thought 2: "Why do cars *park* in driveways & *drive* on
parkways?"
09-14:
Thoughts conveyed through '911' poem by Tim
09-21:
Thought 1: "If trees had legs, their knees would hurt."
Thought 2: "Why snort coke when you could drink it?"
09-26:
Thought: "Why isn't Phonetic spelled the way it sounds?"
10-02:
Thought 1: "Palindromatic Lunar Equation = Oct. 2nd, 2001 =
10022001"
Thought 2: "Who needs rhetorical questions anyways?"
10-05:
Thought: "24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case....coincidence?"
10-18:
Thought 1: "What does the appendix do?"
Thought 2: "Why must everything come to an end? (including this
show)"
10-21:
Thought: "Think about communication and how incredible it is
connecting the world. ie. PB playing live for 100,000 people
immediately across GA. Communication is key."
10-27:
Thought 1: "When a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose?"
Thought 2:" Make the most of every moment." (something to that
extent)
11-02:
Thought: "Question everything."
11-06:
Thought: "Why do Election Days always take place on Tuesday?"
11-09:
Thought: "Be proud of where you are from!"
11-17:
Thought 1: "Silence - quiet or deafening?"
Thought 2: "Wherever you go, there you are."
Thought3: "Why is there brail on drive-up ATM machines?"
Thought 4: 'Linda's Revenge', - Craig
11-24:
Thought: "God = Love, Love = Pizza, God = Pizza."
12-05:
Thought 1: "Everything is what it is."
Thought 2: "*Ain't*, ain't a word."
12-22:
Thought 1: "Gods favorite chord is G-Sus." - Courtesy of Harley
from PMM
Thought 2: "Happy Belated Birthday, Mr. Frank Zappa."
2002
01-05:
Thought: "Why do they call a watch a watch?"
01-12:
Thought: "All humans also carry a gene that can be found in
nothing else except for rice."
01-26:
Thought 1: "Humans are more closely related to chimps than apes
are to chimps."
Thought 2: "I find it ironic when my mom calls me a son of a
****." - by DJ Real
02-09:
Thought: "Tomato... fruit or vegetable?"
02-13:
Thought: A passage from 'Packard Goose' (Frank Zappa) -
"Information is not knowledge - Knowledge is not wisdom - Wisdom
is not truth - Truth is not beauty - Beauty is not love - Love
is not music - Music and Frank Zappa are the best"
02-21:
Thought: "Why do we say we're going to TAKE a crap?"
03-07:
Thought: "Decriminalize marijuana."
03-08:
Thought: "Legalize marijuana (Part 2)."
03-22:
Thought: "If you're driving a vehicle at the speed of light,
what happens when you turn your headlights on?"
04-06:
Thought: "Birthdays are good for you...the more of them you
have, the longer you live."
04-12:
Thought 1: "If you can't see my mirrors, I can't see you."
Thought 2: "Why do ads say free gift? Aren't all gifts free?"
04-18:
Thought 1: "How the **** does anyone get anywhere in Boston?"
Thought 2: "Why rubberneck? If you wanna see that stuff, watch
COPS."
04-24:
Thought: "For God's sake, don't clone humans!"
04-26:
Thought: "Ass is what it's **** up to be."
05-16:
Thought: "Blue chip or clown mask? You decide."
05-26:
Thought 1: "Why doesn't Lisa like this song?"
Thought 2: "Let's make a sandwich."
05-30:
Thought 1: "Beans are neither fruit nor musical."
Thought 2: 'Happy Birthday to Heather!"
06-01:
Thought 1: "Why doesn't the Short Beach Saloon have Guinness?"
Thought 2: "Do airplanes have keys?"
Thought 3: "Why Do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?"
06-13:
Thought: "Everyone must have some Shougar in their diet."
06-18:
Thought: "Why are they called *fingers* when they don't *fing*?"
06-26:
Thought 1: "What happens when a tow truck needs to be towed?"
Thought 2: Adrian on the mouth theramin imitating a meter of
sorts.
06-29:
Thought: "You may be one person in this world, but you also may
be the world to just one person."
07-02:
Thought 1: "Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy
adultery?"
Thought 2: "Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?"
07-07:
Thought 1: "Even Broken clocks are right twice a day."
Thought 2: "What do you call the tube in a paper towel roll?"
Thought 3: "SUNDAY! SUNDAY!! SUNDAY!!!"
07-12:
Thought 1: "The Daltons live in a doozie, The Dolphins are in
the jacuzzi."
Thought 2: "If being bona fide is wrong, I don't want to be
right."
Thought 3: "The Turtle Right of Passage by Wolfman: One fat hen
couple duck three brown bear four running hare five fat fickle
female sitting sipping scotch six simple simon sitting on a
stone seven sinbad sailors sailed the seven seas eight
egotistical egoists echoing egotistical ecstasies nine ****
nublians nimbly nibbling nuts gnats nicotine ten was and never
was a fig plucker nor a fig plucker's son and I ain't leaving
till this **** fig pluckin's done now ask me if I am a turtle.
(Tim) Are you a turtle? (Wolf) You bet your sweet ass I'm a
turtle. Once a turtle, always a turtle!"
07-20:
Thought: "It ain't no sin, to take off your skin, and dance
around in your bones." - William Burroughs
07-23:
Thought 1: "Where is RAQ?"
Thought 2: "APB on RAQ"
Thought 3: "If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months & 6 days you
would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of
coffee.
07-24:
Thought 1: Bratwurst - "Meditations on Bratwurst" (Ron & Adrian
Dialogue)
Thought 2: "Don't get the clowns drunk on bratwurst."
08-04:
Thought: "Does Raisin Bran contain exactly two scoops of
raisins?"
08-07:
Thought: "What if the Hokey Pokey IS what it's all about???"
08-09:
Thought 1: "Why do they sell Coca Cola in liters, not gallons &
milk in gallons, not liters?"
Thought 2: "How many licks does it take to get to the center of
a girl's heart?"
08-30:
Thought 1: "A pig has a 30 minute orgasm."
Thought 2: "Humans & dolphins are the only species that have sex
for pleasure."
Thought 3: "The tongue is the strongest muscle in the body."
08-31:
Thought 1: "A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the
slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest &
weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural
selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general
speed & health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular
killing of the weakest members."
Thought 2: "In much the same way, the human brain can only
operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of
alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it
attacks the slowest & weakest brain cells first. In this way,
regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells,
making the brain a faster & more efficient machine. That's why
you always feel smarter after a few beers."
09-07:
Thought 1: "The average chocolate bar has 8 insect legs in it."
Thought 2: "The housefly hums in the middle octave, key of F."
09-24:
Thought 1: "The perfect heads!"
Thought 2: "Which dome is better?"
10-03:
Thought 1: "If first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for
you."
Thought 2: "Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when
your mouth is moving."
Thought 3: "Never miss a good chance to shut up."
Thought 4: "Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time."
Thought 5: "Sex is like air, It's not important unless you
aren't getting any."
10-11:
Thought 1: "Hard work pays off in the future, but laziness pays
off right now."
Thought 2: "But on the other hand, there are different fingers."
10-18:
Thought 1: "A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the
scenery on a detour."
Thought 2: "How long a minute is depends on what side of the
bathroom door you're on."
Thought 3: "Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once."
Thought 4: "Don't cry because it's over; smile because it
happened."
11-01:
Thought: "Jazz is not dead, it just smells funny." -Frank Zappa
11-23:
Thought: "If God made anything better than pizza, he kept it to
himself."
11-29:
Thought 1: "Tryptophan? What's the deal?"
Thought 2: "A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the
scenery on a detour."
Thought 3: "Ever notice that the people who are late are often
jollier than the people who have to wait for them."
12-11:
Thought: "Do aliens have thumbs?"
12-12:
Thought: "Don't drink & park, accidents cause people."
2003
01-25:
Thought: "All we are saying, is give peace a chance."
01-26:
Thought 1: "SUNDAY! SUNDAY!! SUNDAY!!!"
Thought 2: "It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough
leather for a year's supply of footballs."
02-12:
Thought 1: "If Jimmy cracks corn, and no one cares, why is there
a song about him?"
Thought 2: "Is Disney World the only people trap ran by a
mouse?"
02-14:
Thought 1: "BONA FIDE, chew on it."
Thought 2: "Happy Valentines Day."
Thought 3: "Celebrate the love you have for someone all year &
not just one day, it’s the little things that mean a lot."
03-01:
Thought: "Opinions are like ****; everyone has one & they all
smell but mine!"
03-06:
Thought 1: "Timmy needs sleepy."
Thought 2: "Why is my mic limp?"
Thought 3: "Confucius say he who grow long beard, live long
life."
Thought 4: "Confucius say "Man who goes to bed with itchy
rectum, wakes up with smelly finger."
03-29:
Thought: "If everybody only fought in self-defense, there would
be no fighting."
04-19:
Thought 1: "Register To Vote!"
Thought 2: "Legalize It."
04-27:
Thought 1: "It's a Po Boy!"
Thought 2: "The Air Symphony." - (the sound of sucking in air)
05-02:
Thought 1: "Song Sandwich = Song Boxty."
Thought 2: "News Flash reported by Jordan Giangreco"
Thought 3: "Doozie Meter" read & given by Adrian Tramontano
06-15:
Thought 1: "Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach
him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all
day."
Thought 2: "I don't suffer from insanity?I enjoy every second of
it!"
Thought 3: "I live in my own little world, but it's okay, they
know me here!"
Thought 4: "Don't squat with your spurs on."
Thought 5: "There are two theories to arguing with women.
Neither one works."
Thought 6: "No one is listening until you fart."
Thought 7: "What do bullet-proof vests, fire escapes, windshield
wipers, and laser printers all have in common? All invented by
women."
07-07:
Thought 1: "There are only four words in the English language
which end in *-dous*; tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, &
hazardous."
Thought 2: "There are two words in the English language that
have all five vowels in order: *abstemious* & *facetious*."
Thought 3: "There is a word in the English language with only
one vowel, which occurs five times: *indivisibility*."
Thought 4: "The longest one-syllable word in the English
language is *screeched*."
Thought 5: "The sentence "The quick brown fox jumps over the
lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet."
07-12:
Thought: "Good judgment comes from bad experience, & a lot of
that comes from bad judgment."
07-18:
Thought: "Pizza. On average, Americans consume 18 acres of pizza
a day."
08-23:
Thought 1: 'Elephants can run 20 miles per hour."
Thought 2: "Elephants are the only mammals with 4 knees."
10-31:
Thought: "Trick or treat."
11-13:
Thought: "The smallest county in America, is Manhattan."
11-20:
Thought: "Duct Tape is like the force. It has a light side and a
dark side, & it holds the universe together."
12-27:
Thought: "2004 - Be safe..." ("be something else... archivist
forget what)
2004
02-24:
Thought: "Cheers to good health!"
03-24:
Thought 1: "Chickpea is neither a chick nor a pea, discuss."
Thought 2: "Venue Rules: No Drugs or Nuclear Weapons Allowed."
04-24:
Thought 1: "Congratulations to Jordan for beating the top score
on the pinball machine by 100 million points."
Thought 2: "Thanks to the crew: Josh Dobson & Chris Mandler."
05-01:
Thought: "Honk if you love peace and quiet."
06-04:
Thought 1: "Congrats to Seniors of George School!"
Thought 2: "Information is not knowledge, knowledge is not
wisdom, wisdom is not truth, truth is not beauty, beauty is not
love, love is not music, music & Frank Zappa are the best!" -
Packard Goose by Frank Zappa
09-18:
Thought: "The best way to double your money is to fold it up and
put it back in your pocket." (dedicated to those playing keno
next door at the bar)
10-27:
Thought: "I Enjoy Yourself!"
2005
03-04:
Thought 1: "Real Radio." (Tim thanks entire crew)
Thought 2: "Why don't we play Food For Thought anymore?"
04-21:
Thought 1: "Thanks for spinning the wheel."
Thought 2: "How come we don't play Food for Thought anymore?"
05-27:
Thought 1: "Welcome back to Josh Dobson."
Thought 2: "Being healthy is merely the slowest possible way for
someone to die."
Thought 3: "Crocodiles never outgrow the pool in which they
live."
Thought 4: "Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?"
Thought 5: "Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into
jet engines?"
08-20:
Thought 1: "The Puppet House Rocks!" (x3)
Thought 2: "Welcome Gregg Ellis to the lights for The
Breakfast!"
2006
01-26:
Thought 1: "Why don't we play Food For Thought anymore?"
Thought 2: "Can you teach an old dog new tricks in 2006?"
04-06:
Thought: "One third of all 'Food For Thoughts' is true."
10-21:
Thought: "Be good to each other."
2007
03-02:
Thought 1: "Chimps have been seen hunting other animals in
Senegal."
Thought 2: "Get yer damn hands off me!"
03-17:
Thought 1: "Arthur Guinness signed a 9000 year contract to keep
Guinness in Dublin."
Thought 2: "Brilliant!"
Thought 3: "Corned beef & cabbage."
07-06:
Thought 1: "Question everything!"
Thought 2: "Give peace a chance."
10-25:
Thought 1: "Is the king really alive or dead?"
Thought 2: "Give. Give. Give. Give. Give.... Strangers helping
strangers putting food in peoples' mouths. Think about that for
a second, and give, give, give, give, give."
Thought 3: "Sound guy solo - Take it away!"
Thought 4: "FREAKOUT!!!"
11-30:
Thought: "Three questions: Who is your best friend in the world?
Who do you trust the most? Who do you want to hug right now?"
#Post#: 287014--------------------------------------------------
Re: The All Encompassing Thread of Thoughts!
DIR By: simpletwistupdon
Date: March 7, 2026, 8:07 am
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As of the creation of this post on 3/6/26, it has/had been 6,671
days since FFT was last played. Thank you for your attention to
this matter.
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