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#Post#: 5114--------------------------------------------------
Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: JoAnon Date: May 16, 2012, 6:56 pm
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This thread is specifically made for the amusing (and oftentimes
strange) things Beans and I get up to in Steam. Posts will vary
from speculations on headcanons to weird pieces of crackfic!
Expect lots of keymashing from Beans as I write odd things to
make her laugh. Also expect some bad spelling... and p.orn....
crack p.orn.
#Post#: 5115--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: magicbeans Date: May 16, 2012, 7:02 pm
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You didn't mention the RPs :P [s]I should be embarrassed over
the existence of this thread but idk I guess I'm past being
embarrassed now[/s]
#Post#: 5116--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: JoAnon Date: May 16, 2012, 7:05 pm
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This was written when Beans was writing her Post-Apocalyptic AU
and sending me bits of it. This was when she was debating on
whether or not to have Jeremy be a Beastman/Mutant. Somehow, the
topic of David Attenborough came up and this followed:
The wild Jeremy flaps his long ears and wiggles his tail when he
is ready to court the tame Jordi.
Unfortunately, his efforts have been for naught since the tame
Jordi is blind and, therefore, unable to see this strange
courtship ritual.
Undeterred, the wild Jeremy will then mount his chosen mate to
show all who is Alpha.
Message delivered, he will then rut with the tame Jordi until
both are sated, biting his mates shoulder to both show dominance
and to mark his territory.
This is David Attenborough, and you are watching Mating Habits
of the Post-Apocalyptic Tribes
****************************************************************
*****************
Followed by this:
bookish_scout: David Attenborough: "The Italian Gabry's greeting
consists of fondling another's genitals. When in season, the
Australian Liam reciprocates the greeting and expresses his
interest in mating by grabbing the Gabry's bottom and
squeezing…”
bookish_scout: "Sometimes adding a spank for good measure."
#Post#: 5117--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: JoAnon Date: May 16, 2012, 8:18 pm
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This was during a chat on other pairings:
Mean Bean: gabry and jeremy would be funny too because jeremy
would always argue and not realise that he was also taking his
clothes off at the same time
Mean Bean: gabry and jordi would be similar to jordi with liam
and liam and jeremy would just hate each other and never have
sex
bookish_scout: Gabry would come on strong and Jordi would be
squeaking every other move
bookish_scout: Gabry would announce he wants to have sex by
creeping behind Jordi, wrapping his arms around him, then stick
a hand down his pants to fondle Jordi.
Mean Bean: haha yes
Mean Bean: i didn't realise i needed that until you said it haha
bookish_scout: and Jordi would scream in surprise
bookish_scout: Jordi would be intimidated by Liam and Liam would
be a bit annoyed, but at the same time he'd probably be gentle
Mean Bean: and when Jordi and Jeremy finally get to have sex,
the earth splits in half in shock
Mean Bean: and they are somehow caught on opposite sides of the
split even though theyre not quite done yet idk
Liam: "Stop with the bloody squeaking. Can't take ya seriously
when it sounds like I'm about to f.uck a mouse. Easy there,
don't hyperventilate... Chroist, you're worse than a bloody
virgin."
Mean Bean: okay that's it i can never top that i'm leaving the
internet forever
Jordi: "I've never been with a man."
Liam: "Ah Feck, you are a virgin! This is gonna be a right pain
in the arse."
Jordi: "I'd rather it not be."
#Post#: 5118--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: JoAnon Date: May 16, 2012, 8:22 pm
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On Smoking:
Jordi: "Nicole, where are my cigarettes?"
Nicole: "I set them on fire. You don't need any more of that
stuff in your lungs."
Jordi:"Where did you set them on fire?"
Nicole: "Outsi-Oh come on! You surely can't be THAT desperate
for a smoke?"
Jordi: "Tonight's my first date with Jeremy."
Nicole: ".... They're by the garbage bins."
Jordi: "Merci"
#Post#: 5122--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam (CAN BE NS
FW)
By: JoAnon Date: May 16, 2012, 9:09 pm
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This is the PART ONE of the MST3K-style commentary I provided on
the snippets of Magicbeans' AU fic that she sent for me to beta.
WARNING: mentions of dicks and foul language, among other
things.
Mean Bean: Jeremy had had to get used to a lot of things very
quickly since leaving what was left of his home. Hunger that
pulled the insides of his stomach, thirst that reduced his lips
and mouth to paper, sand that still managed to cake in the backs
of his knees and insides of his elbows through his clothes. They
were all travelling companions to him now.
bookish_scout: and with no toliet paper around. He learned
really quickly which leaf was poison oak.
Mean Bean: haha
****************************************************************
***********************
bookish_scout: and possibly Jordi. In which case, possible sexy
times. Jeremy's c.ock twitched at the prospect.
****************************************************************
*****************************
bookish_scout: Jeremy leaned back and fell asleep with with a
smile on his face, pleasant dreams running through his head of
bending over and f.ucking a Frenchman into the mud of a clean,
safe spring.
bookish_scout: Several miles away, a certain Frenchman wakes up
with a boner for the fourth night in a row from strange dreams,
wondering if there was something wrong with him.
bookish_scout: A white cat purrs nearby, watching
bookish_scout: Jordi's boner immediately goes bye-bye as he
meets the gaze of that f.ucking cat that he somehow can't bring
himself to kill
****************************************************************
******************
Mean Bean: He shuffled around and hissed in pain as he stretched
his legs out. His knees were sore from sleeping curled up the
way he had, and his muscles weren’t faring much better. He put
the socks on his hands again and massaged his calves, stretching
his toes inside his shoes. He’d give anything for a bath - even
an open pond would do at this point - but he hadn’t had the
opportunity in a week or two.
bookish_scout: A vision of a white porcelin tub appeared before
him, filled to the brim with steaming water and a naked
Frenchman. "Quoi? How did I get here? Who are you?"
Mean Bean: *snickers*
bookish_scout: Jeremy grinned wickedly, "Ooooooh yeah,
funtimes.'
bookish_scout: jeremy stripped off his clothes and climbed into
the tub, ignoring the squawking of the Frenchman. "Hey there,
Pickle Thief. How's it going?"
bookish_scout: Jordi froze at the close proximity of the strange
naked man in the tub with him. "Could be better. I am alone,
naked, with a naked man whom I know I've never met before but
seems to know me, in a bathtub that's just appeared out of
nowhere. I must be 'aving a strange nightmare."
bookish_scout: Jeremy smirked and climbed on top of the stiff
man, "Sorry about that, handsome. Let me make this a good dream,
then." With that, he kissed the man, drowning out the indignant
squawk with his tongue. He hadn't gotten laid in... ever. And he
wasn't about to let small things like unexplained narrative
events stop him.
bookish_scout: Jordi struggled at first, then relaxed under the
younger man on top of him. What the hell... this was the
apocalypse. He could drop dead any day now. That's as good a
reason as any to have sex with a complete stranger. And he could
take advantage of the bath afterwards for a rare chance to be
clean. With that, he started responding to the kiss, wrapping a
wet arm around the young man.
The rest of this will be in a future post because it's very NSFW
and long
****************************************************************
********
Beans told me that Nicole and Ian kept Jordi inside.
bookish_scout: Jordi: "These walls are driving me crazy. I just
need a change of scenery, I'll be back in within an hour."
bookish_scout: Nicole and Ian: "No! March your a.ss to your room
right now, Mister!"
bookish_scout: Jordi walks back to his room, head hanging
dejectedly.
Mean Bean: jeremy is there
Mean Bean: with a ribbion tied to his d.ick
bookish_scout: and a little bell attached to it
Mean Bean: jebus
Mean Bean: xD
bookish_scout: it tinkles whenever he moves
Mean Bean: KLJDFSSLDG
bookish_scout: I just realized that that sentence can be
misinterpreted
bookish_scout: tinkle can also mean 'pee a little bit'
Mean Bean: i know xD
****************************************************************
*
Bean told me there was a big plot twist about Jordi (Jeremy
hadn't reached them yet), and there are pages of me just
guessing randomly:
bookish_scout: already dead?
Mean Bean: cus i want like one su-- LOL no
Mean Bean: LOL I FORGOT THAT JORDI WAS ALREADY DEAD
bookish_scout: Jeremy: "Ew... You had me f.ucking a zombie?"
bookish_scout: Jordi: "Braaaaaaiiiiiinnnzzz."
bookish_scout: ZombieJordi:"sssseeeexxxxxx"
Mean Bean: LOlL:FSDLSDFJYE
bookish_scout: he's prostituting himself for food and water?
Mean Bean: NO haha
bookish_scout: "stale food gets you a blowjob. a full meal and
fresh water gets you anything you ask."
Mean Bean: *headdesk* omg...
*************************************************
When Jeremy was in a tree and Nicole and Ian were below:
bookish_scout: Jeremy tried to take his mind off his panic by
thinking of the mysterious frenchman from his dreams bent over,
rear end turning red as he paddled him. Bad move. Now he was
hiding. in a tree. with a boner. While two strangers were below.
Maybe if he was quiet enough...
bookish_scout: Ian: "Hey Nicole, some bird sh.at on you."
#Post#: 5126--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: magicbeans Date: May 17, 2012, 2:38 am
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You didn't tell me you'd kept the bathtub p*rn :O
#Post#: 5128--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: JoAnon Date: May 17, 2012, 7:54 am
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Well, now you know I did.
#Post#: 5130--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: magicbeans Date: May 17, 2012, 8:44 am
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You're a star
#Post#: 5159--------------------------------------------------
Re: Crack JoAnon and Magicbeans come up with in Steam
By: JoAnon Date: May 20, 2012, 5:25 pm
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So I walked into a livestream of Kytri's and the topic was
fluffers. For those of you who don't know... in the porn
industry, there is an on-set job called "Fluffer." A fluffer's
job is to keep a guy's equipment... "interested" between
takes... using his hands. So in a separate chat, I provided a
scenario where Gabry was a porn actor-turned-director, Jordi and
Jeremy were actors who were new to the industry but desperate
for a job, and Liam.... was a no-nonsense professional Fluffer.
bookish_scout: Liam: "Alright, let's get this thing up."
Mean Bean: bngfjhfhgtduykuhjk
bookish_scout: Jordi: "Gyaak! Not so rough!"
bookish_scout: Liam: "Sorry 'bout that, Mate. Here, let me
just..."
bookish_scout: Jordi: "Wait! What are you- oOoooooh........"
bookish_scout: Liam: "There you go. Now you're good and ready."
Gets up and slaps Jordi's bottom in emphasis, causing Jordi to
give a whimper. "Okay Jeremy, now it's your turn- oh, good.
You're already good to go. They're ready, Gabry!"
*****************************************************
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