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       #Post#: 13748--------------------------------------------------
       a few goodin's 
   DIR By: semiauto
       Date: August 28, 2013, 4:44 am
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       Two
       guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and
       family
       values.
       Bill said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married,
       did you?'
       Larry replied, 'I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?'
       ___________________________________________
       A
       little boy went up to his father and asked: 'Dad, where did my
       intelligence come from?'
       The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have
       got it from your mother, cause I still have mine.'
       ___________________________________________
       'Mr.
       Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the Divorce
       Court Judge
       said, 'And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week,'
       'That's
       very fair, your honor,' the husband said. 'And every now and
       then I'll try
       to send her a few bucks myself.'
       ___________________________________________
       A
       doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency
       Room, took
       the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your
       wife at all.'
       'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and
       really
       good
       with the kids.'
       ___________________________________________
       An
       old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse
       he has been
       living with for the last 40 years.
       The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you
       will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the
       curse on
       you.'
       The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you
       man and wife.'
       ___________________________________________
       A
       blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long
       it'll take
       to fly from San Francisco to New York City?'
       The agent replies, 'Just
       a minute.'
       'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.
       ___________________________________________
       Two
       Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan
       Gonzalez.
       'How was he killed?' asked one detective.
       'With a golf gun,'
       the other detective replied.
       'A golf gun! What the heck is a golf
       gun?'
       'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.'
       ___________________________________________
       Moe:
       'My wife got me to believe in religion.'
       Joe: 'Really?'
       Moe:
       'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.'
       ___________________________________________
       A
       man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears
       and asks
       him how he is feeling.
       'I'm O.K. But I didn't like the four
       letter-words the doctor used in surgery,' he answered.
       'What did
       he say,' asked the nurse.
       'Oops!'
       ___________________________________________
       While
       shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display
       of
       bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds
       since I
       had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my
       husband's
       advice.
       'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an
       all-in-one?'
       'Better get a bikini,' he replied. 'You'd never get it
       all in one.'
       He's still in intensive care.
       ___________________________________________
       The
       graveside service just barely finished, when there was a massive
       clap of
       thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied
       by even
       more thunder rumbling in the distance...
       The little old man looked at
       the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.
       #Post#: 13750--------------------------------------------------
       Re: a few goodin's 
   DIR By: Stewartyg
       Date: August 28, 2013, 4:55 am
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       Semi you have far to much time on your hands lol took me long
       enough to read them!!
       #Post#: 13755--------------------------------------------------
       Re: a few goodin's 
   DIR By: Lee
       Date: August 28, 2013, 6:48 am
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       Lol
       #Post#: 13907--------------------------------------------------
       Re: a few goodin's 
   DIR By: jimbo
       Date: September 1, 2013, 4:44 am
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       i was thinking the same stewarty lol but some made me lol :)
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