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#Post#: 3692--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Quiet Evening at the Café
By: Marked Twine Date: September 30, 2014, 11:33 pm
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Marked you silly fool! He'd been so focused on how the very act
of stretching in front of Rainbow and Agilene might make him
look foolish that the idea that he would be doing it wrong
hadn't even crossed his mind! As a result Marked felt his cheeks
wear a light shade of red as Rainbow corrected him on what he
was doing, adjustments being made as they were instructed.
Marked, while finding the slip up about wings to be amusing,
couldn't pull himself from having resorted to giving Rainbow a
perpetual look of unsure embarrassment as every move he made was
soon done more slowly and carefully as he watched her for any
other signs of him screwing up. Boy did he wish he'd paid more
attention in gym...
When Rainbow started to go into more depth about her story
Marked was able to stop focusing so much on his, most likely
overblown in his own mind, show of P.E. related ignorance and
instead go back into doing his stretches more calmly as he
listened in. He was glad to hear she was planning on fleshing
out the world - him already having mentioned his love of good
lore - though her current attention to the main story, while to
be expected of course and even encouraged, did make him wish
he'd caught her idea further into its development so as to have
more yummy fluff to delve into. The core seemed interesting on
it's own, Marked picking up the name of the main character as
well as some details about some forbidden love, a mysterious
appearance of a child, her not fitting in and even what her
parents were.
Marked wondered if the event involving the village being
overtaken by pegasi guards was going to be the beginning
chapters of the story to kick things off or happen further along
the line after some more in-depth development of the character
and the village itself. Either way, sounds like it would be a
rather exciting and interesting way of taking both Rumina and
the reader to Cloudsdale to show of the pegasi and how things
would be for them had they isolated themselves. The mention of
Rumina being capable of some form of magic, beyond the normal
pegasus magic all winged ponies were born with he assumed, also
raised a curious eyebrow as Marked finished up his stretching
and allowed himself another rest on his seat as he half flopped
back down with a sigh. Finally! No more need for any further
physical strain! At least for a while.
The writer felt confident in guessing who the villain of the
story was going to be after the mention of Crystal Pony Seer,
and he had more than enough food for thought even before being
given the second helping that was heaped on with what Rainbow
divulged before excusing herself from the table. Marked needed
to be ready to read those notes... His curiosity was beginning
to demand it of him. His hoof made its way down to his saddle
bags again and started to get to work in removing the heavy
books and the wool cloths being carried inside while Rainbow was
absent to make space for him to reach his glasses underneath. As
he set down the first of his books onto the table in front of
him, Marked gave Agilene a friendly smile, not wanting to be
rude or force a silence between them with Rainbow gone he tried
to keep up some conversation.
"Quite an idea so far, eh?" Marked said as he rummaged through
his bag and pulled out his glasses, resting them on his muzzle
and fighting the urge to start flipping through the notes on the
table without their author present, "I'm liking it so far. Have
you ever written anything, Miss Flow? What do you do for a
living? And do you live around town? I don't recall ever having
seen you around before, though that's not exactly saying much
with how shut away I can become." For all he knew Agilene could
be a new local hero and Marked probably still had a fairly
decent chance of not having seen her before that day. He really
did need to go out more and try to socialize better.
Marked listened for Agilene's reply as he tried to decide
between leaving his books out on the table where they were
currently stacked or slipping them back into his bags to be
given to her later after they'd discussed her own story first.
Would they even manage to be stuffed back into his bags without
tearing something? Marked was kind of wondering how he'd managed
it in his rush the first time when looking between his books and
the bag beside him was starting to make him feel like he was
trying to figure out a geometry puzzle... How does one fit this
many large books inside of a container not designed to
accommodate without damaging something...
In the end, Marked decided to attempt to stuff the books back
into their places... mostly out of being nervous of showing them
so soon. He failed to fit them where they were before however
since it seemed oddly impossible now, and so only two of the
books were packed back away while the third was merely set on
top of his bags which were again set down next to him and out of
the way by the time the now pancake bearing Rainbow Dash
returned.
"Oh, you know, you don't have to..." Marked tried to say as
Rainbow declared that she would take care of the full cheque for
the food herself, his hoof reaching out and accepting the
offered cocoa and right away being pulled back to allow the hot
beverage to be held close to his chest where its delicious aroma
was free to rise up and into his nostrils, "Really, I know you
mentioned it being because I'm here to help with your story, but
I wanted to come and was happy just to hang out so there's
really no need..." He tried, but his tone wasn't very loud or
strong out of his worry that he would offend, it being very
possible that Rainbow may not have even heard him at all.
Either way, he was quick to take a sip of the hot cocoa he was
holding that was currently seducing him with its scent, his
first sip being carefully made to avoid being burned while
maximizing taste as it was washed over his taste buds. His mouth
was flooded with chocolate euphoria as he gave a small hum of
approval over the flavor, the sip causing a wave of wonderful
warmth to spread out from deep in his chest and down in his
belly as it was swallowed, something his chilled body was in
serious need of as the rising of his core temperature brought a
smile to his face. He glanced out the window to check on the
rain, him wishing that he had himself a sweater or a hoodie
-Well, a dry one at least - to make this even better as he
snuggled a bit into his seat and refrained from taking any of
the pancakes for himself yet and just wished to enjoy his cocoa
for the time being.
#Post#: 3693--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Quiet Evening at the Café
By: Agilene Date: October 1, 2014, 12:21 am
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This is something Agilene needed. A nice night of listening to a
story, especially one that has good potential. The pegasus
sipped her cocoa as Dash spoke about the main protagonist.
Images of a cold, lonely pegasus slowly formed in her head the
more Rumina was talked about. Following that image comes a
vision of a bleak town of hopeless ponies. Ponies that simply
wouldn't get along with each other. Were there any flaws to
Dash's story from what Agilene heard? She just couldn't figure
any out. As Agilene thought to herself before, she's no writer,
so she has more questions than feedback.
Another aspect of Rumina's description that caught her attention
was the way she is introduced. From there, more questions arose
in her mind. On top of that, she also had to get to Twine's many
queries about herself. The relaxed pegasus leaned back on her
chair, and faced Dash to ask, "First of all, what do you mean by
Rumina appearing in the town like she was teleported? Perhaps
that would be explained later in the tale?" Agilene then face
Marked, "And no, Mr. Twine. The only thing I've ever written was
a diary during my younger years..." Agilene muttered, "A bit
embarrassing." She continued, "And I live in Detrot, but travel
to other areas from time to time." She pretended ignore his
other question about her way of living. Nothing exciting could
possibly be said about doing paper routes around a sad excuse of
the place she calls home.
Agilene took another sip of her cocoa before commenting, "After
hearing all the news about Miss. Dash being reckless and a role
model, I never expected her to stay still in one place to write
stories." Her eyes turn to her pegasus table guest, "It is
always a pleasure to see more of what a well known star does in
their spare time than what the media makes them out to be."
#Post#: 3907--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Quiet Evening at the Café
By: Rainbow Dash Date: October 19, 2014, 10:16 pm
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Dash's cerise eyes locked with Agilene's as she spoke, lighting
up as the mare mentioned "all the news" she had heard about the
pegasus, although their glow dimmed a bit when the word
"reckless" was mentioned. The mare shrunk slightly into her
corner of the booth, unsure if Agilene was being sincere or
offering some sort of a backwards compliment. Then again,
Rainbow Dash may not have made the best first impression on the
mare... "I'm not reckless, I'm-" she stopped herself short in
mid sentence, her eyes darting to the table again as she sighed.
"Okay, okay, maybe I am a bit hasty at times. But what can I
say? I'm a mare of action." Dash paused once more, finally
shifting her gaze back towards Agilene. "The media and I have a
rather... complicated relationship. At one point I was consumed
by keeping up my own appearance for them. They would call me a
hero... And I liked that. But after the Mare-Do-Well incident, I
realized that it was only a label. I'm just a normal, awesome
Pegasus with normal, awesome friends. Point is: I wouldn't trust
everything the media says about me."
The rainbow-maned mare trailed off, diverting her eyes again as
she took a sip from her drink. It was obviously a low blow to
her ego, but perhaps she was just trying to cover her own flank.
Despite Dash's good intentions, other ponies would occasionally
cast her in a bad light due to her antics. And that was an even
worse blow... It'd be better off to come clean right from the
beginning.
"Aaaaanyways~," she continued, taking another large sip before
sliding her cup to the end of the table. "As far as your
question goes, Rumina appeared like she was teleported because
she was teleported in. The reader won't find out who or why
until later, but Rumina's mother poofed her into the nearby
village to save her from capture. Her parents were being chased
across the country-side by a Pegasi regiment, and... Well, I'm
not sure what I want to do with her parents yet. If they evade
capture, they would probably continue west. But if they do get
caught... They would probably get axed... Any ideas for that,
maybe?"
Rainbow Dash would then turn her attention to Marked, passing
over a few papers to read once he was ready. "This is what I've
come up with for the Pegasi in particular. With Commander
Hurricane leading, they would be quite militaristic in nature.
Hierarchy would be determined by rank, and there would be a no
tolerance, no failure regime. I'm not sure if you know the
history behind Commander Hurricane, but he was a rather cold and
callous individual. But he was fearless, and he knew how to get
the job done. His arrogance would be his undoing, though. Seems
to be a common thing with many of the Pegasi leaders, even
today."
#Post#: 3919--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Quiet Evening at the Café
By: Marked Twine Date: October 21, 2014, 11:23 am
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D'aww. A diary.Marked had kept a journal to jot down ideas when
he was younger, but no actual diary or day journal meant to
record his experiences as he'd been more focused on making up
new stories than recording his own, which... he wasn't sure
should make him feel happy or sad. Huh. Eh. Either way Makred
didn't press when the other questions he'd asked had been
ignored, him knowing it was her business whether or not she
shared. He couldn't help but agree with how the idea of Rainbow
staying put long enough to construct a full length story seemed
difficult to believe if one went off of reputation and hear say
alone, but, hey, if she could actually have read and enjoyed
something he'd written then anything was friggin possible now in
Marked's mind.
Marked eagerly, perhaps too eagerly in fact, scooped up the
pages offered to him after having listened to her response to
Agilene, him giving a nod at the question of if he was familiar
with Commander Hurricane. He had, in fact, given that time
period quite a bit of his own research in the past for the sake
of including bits and pieces of vague history into his own works
sometimes to add a little more mystery to the story, and what he
was hearing in regards to Rainbow's idea for the pegasi seemed
pretty in line with what he knew. The winged race did always
like to take a more militaristic approach to issues, this making
it no surprise why his experience showed that the majority of
royal guards defending the crown had wings.
"Including her parents would mainly depend on how far you would
want to take it," he responded to her requesting of ideas for
Rumina's parents, eyes flicking up at Rainbow occasionally as he
studied the pages he'd been given, "It could work if, say for
example, you had them merely be mentioned and not be incredibly
important to the over all story, just some minor mention here ad
there if any, but it could also work well as having them be very
important. Maybe they were involved in some kind of conspiracy
or were just important ponies in society before they started
seeing each other and breaking racist rules. Who knows? Rumina
certainly doesn't, and as she learns the reader would too. All
kinds of options are open to you and it's only really limited by
how much effort you want to put into fleshing them out. Of
course, can't put too much focus on them unless they become
major characters at some point directly involved in the main
story, otherwise it's just a distraction. Buuut~..." He fell
silent for a moment before realizing he'd probably just
brainstormed the ears off of the other ponies at the table, him
looking up with a small sheepish grin.
"Er... Sorry. I can kind of zone out sometimes with this stuff.
So far I feel you have an interesting idea. I take it that since
you mentioned him that Commander Hurricane will be a big player
in the story's events? And of he's involved and the plot is
about Rumina uniting the three clans I'd assume that Clover the
Clever, Princess Platinum, Pansy, Puddinghead and so on may make
appearances as well. Are there going to be any other fictional
characters olaying an important role in the story? A companion
for Rumina perhaps?"
#Post#: 3924--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Quiet Evening at the Café
By: Agilene Date: October 21, 2014, 9:47 pm
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With a nod, Agilene agreed with Marked's opinion. However, the
idea of Rumina's parents getting "axed" sent a chill down her
body, and frightened her to the point where she did not know
what to think of it. There were a couple ways to interpret that
idea: Non-lethal and lethal. Agilene first thought of the lethal
way, which would be rather sad for little Rumina and possibly
the reader. Despite the feeling she had gotten, her body stayed
still as a rock. But her eyes narrowed as the thought stayed in
her mind.
"Perhaps if you do want an engaging read, you can take the
approach of the parents getting caught. However, you can
probably have Rumina attempt to save them from dying, assuming
that was what you were implying." Agilene leaned back on her
chair, and stared up at the ceiling as she spewed out a couple
more ideas, "You can make the journey difficult, thus engaging
readers to continue."
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