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       #Post#: 3556--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Sore Afraid
       By: Kerry Date: January 4, 2016, 3:02 pm
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       [quote author=Piper link=topic=398.msg3550#msg3550
       date=1451932562]
       People. The history of my life has taught me not to trust
       easily, that people hurt and betray, yet my faith has taught me
       to forgive, without reservation--even regardless of apology by
       the offending party.  I lay it down.  I try again.  I let the
       people who hurt me, who disrespect and betray me, who trample my
       pearls, trash my hard-won faith, back into my life-- because I
       was taught to forgive, and I am good at willingly forgetting.
       However, the conundrum is that by doing so, I find myself in the
       same sinking ship, over and over. 70 x7, yes . . . But.
       Forgiving does not mean deliberately placing oneself in harm's
       way.  And, while I believe in forgiveness, I absolutely believe
       in the value of sincere apology.  The key word is 'sincere',
       because apology stems from repentance, and God, Himself, asks
       that we repent when we have done wrong.  If we can not apologize
       after an offense, it is because we are either too proud or we
       feel no repentance.  [/quote]You may want to forgive someone;
       but if he doesn't want to change by repenting, he remains
       unforgiven.  If he is unwilling to do penance to undo any harm
       he's done, his apology if there is one is fake.   Some people
       put up fake apologies because they think you need to be placated
       or feel superior.  Others see you as stupid, someone they can
       walk over time and again.   Far from doing penance, some people
       seem to get a kick out of being told you forgive them so they
       can do it again, pulling the rug out from under you.    You may
       wish to forgive them and have God forgive them; but if they see
       your goodness as something to be exploited, you are in that
       strange position where showing them kindness can make them
       worse.
       I do not think Jesus meant we can  forgive someone 490 times for
       the same offense.  Such a person is not learning from his
       mistakes or appreciating your generosity.  His repentance was
       sham, so there is no real forgiveness except in your mind as
       what you want for him.     If he learns from his mistakes he's
       made with you, you  have done him a great service as a servant
       of Christ.   He has his reward and you will have yours too since
       you were part of how God solved the problem.
       As a witness  for God, you have the ability to teach others that
       one person can forgive and forget if the other person genuinely
       repents is a key to unlock other things.  He can then believe
       all his other sins might be fixed.  It dawns on him that maybe
       Jesus taught some truth.   It doesn't work though if he is
       faking repentance.  In that case, he is not  your brother nor
       should you try to treat him as a brother. He must learn that
       repentance is more than having someone else being willing to
       forgive him.
       Matthew 18:35 So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto
       you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother
       their trespasses.
       Out of time.  I'll already be late for work.
       #Post#: 3557--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Sore Afraid
       By: Piper Date: January 4, 2016, 3:12 pm
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       [font=trebuchet ms]^ Save me some pizza. :)
       Have a good day![/font]
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