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#Post#: 56654--------------------------------------------------
i'm tired
By: Raven` Date: July 10, 2015, 7:37 am
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[spoiler=warning; blurriness, stickers, words, et
cetera][IMG]
HTML http://i60.tinypic.com/ruz3bq.jpg[/img]
tbh i felt like i needed to smile so i faked it
kfbzdfbgdjbrg iM TIRED BUT WHATEVER
HAPPY BIRTHDAY U GET MY FACE
[s]'n serious b careful on what you say bc like??? im hella
egotistical and conceited when it comes to my physical
appearance. so. like. compliments are welcome, but they may make
my ego blow up.[/spoiler]
anyways i was messing around in pixlr and then i remembered that
my webcam actually works so i took a picture of myself and
started messing around. things led to one another, and here we
are. i guess that half way through messing with the picture, i
figured that since i've known you guys for years upon years,
that i shouldn't be scared to show my face??
if you want me to be honest, im a lil scared to post this but at
the same time excited??? like, for years i've been on the train
of "they've never seen my face. that's cool." but now i consider
you guys like really close friends and probably even family (i
mean, i go to you guys for advice, for rants. i'm surprised i
don't go to you guys when i'm hungry or some sh.t like that.)
anYWHO
just bc i did this, doesn't mean you have to. please, don't feel
like you have to share your face. you don't. not even close.
this is just something that i thought i could do, and i can. of
course, if you want to, go for it. i hardly can wait! but if
not, that's cool too. i can keep imagining you. and that's fun
as well. :3
cute fun facts about me
[o] im going to bein the sophomore class of 2015/216. that
said, i cut my hair up to my ears in sixth grade - nearly four
years ago. this is four years of hair, y'all. i also got hella
trims, too.
[o] like i said a bit ago, i'm hella egotistical/conceited.
like. when people i know rlly well say "awh u look cute" my
first mental response is "i know" and sometimes i even speak
it?? i have to remind myself that "thank you" is the correct
response. that said, if people i don't know well say that, then
i'm a shy mess that fumbles the words "thank you"
[o] [rant(?) ahead]
onto my shyness. on the internet, i'm practically fearless and
myself. most of the time off the internet, i'm the same way. as
long its around close friends/family. but, places like school,
or the mall, or even parties, i find myself distancing myself. i
want to have fun, but i'm nervous as hell that i'll mess up or
something. i talk in a hella quiet voice. i remember one time
when i tried to talk to someone, but my voice was so quiet that
they didn't hear me. aahhh. there's also the fact that in places
like school or the mall, i'm afraid to ask for help? i don't
want to seem stupid in front of other students, or workers in
stores.
but hell, if one of my other friends are with me in school or at
the mall, i'm an outgoing mess. talking to the workers at the
mall, actually raising my hand in class. my friends and family
are practically everything to me, to the point where they pull
me out of my shyness and into who i really am/aspire to be.
[o] [hella more rantish stuff]
i've actually started to think on what i want to do in life.
i've narrowed it down to about four things. author,
veterinarian, pet groomer, and pet shelter owner. of course,
things like author are hard to make a career out of. and you
can't just get up and make a shelter, as far as i know. pet
groomer needs extensive lessons, and so do veterinarian... so i
don't know.
i remember, though, when i was younger. before i had a large
interest in writing, i had a plan that included the last three
jobs. i would take become a veterinarian. i would take a job at
a shelter, learn how they work things. when i had time off, i
could take lessons as a pet groomer, and when that is done,
offer more time at the current shelter as a groomer. pretty
much, after all that, and once i had enough money, i would open
my own pet shelter and home/save as many pets as i can. there is
a no-kill law where i'm at, which pretty much means that the
whole "after 72 hours" thing isn't allowed. animals are to be
taken care of until they are deathly ill or extremely old &
suffering. here, we only put animals out of their misery. but,
because of this law, all of the shelters are pretty much full
and begging for donations of food and other things. my younger
self wanted to open her own shelter to help lighten the load on
other shelters. and with the skills of veterinarian and pet
groomer, she thought that she could earn extra money through
that.
my younger self was pretty smart, but i can't help to think that
her plan is hella harder than it seems. but now that i actually
wrote it out, i actually quite like it. just imagine, one day i
could actually achieve that. then the question comes around,
"are you who your younger self wanted to be?" Yes. Yes I am. A
spitting image of it.
[o] i'm allergic to flea bites & vegetable oil.
[o] in second grade, my best friend left me because i was
wearing boy shoes. the cute thing about this is that although i
cried all day, i later realized that she was just hella jealous.
i had my pure black adidas while she had some hand me down
sketcherz. come at me, b.tch
[o] i met my second bully in fifth grade. she was about twice my
size and had the voice of a full grown man. she would always use
my height (i think i had just breached four feet) against me. i
can't remember exactly the things she did other than tease me
and try to make me feel like i'm hella less than i'm worth, but
i do remember standing up to her on many occasions, putting my
foot down, and essentially owning her. bullies don't do sh.t to
me.
[o] she goes to high school with me now and everytime i pass her
in the halls i size her up. i'm the same height as her now, and
have hella better hair. i'm 67% sure that she has a weave or her
hair is just straight up dead from straightening and crimping it
everyday. ;3
#Post#: 56658--------------------------------------------------
Re: i'm tired
By: dawnfire111 Date: July 10, 2015, 12:54 pm
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oMG YOU'RE faCE tHsI iS iT
OOMG
aAAaHHH ik you said be careful about the compliments but dang
girl you are really gorgeous i can't believe we're friends tbh
uGH i wish we could all do this and bond more bc we've all seen
each other's facES LIKEE??
and to tell you guys the truth, i don't think i would really
mind posting a picture. i'd kinda love for you guys to see my
face, it'd be so much more real, you know?? i'm pretty
comfortable with how i look, even if i'm not exactly your
average pretty. it's just that i'm not sure how my parents would
react if they found out??? aND i have an old flip phone with a
really crappy camera that makes my face look ugly sO
[s]bASICALLY the only reason i want an ipod
camera
snapchat
internet
mhm
wait[/s]
almost sorta same here about the shyness
except i'm known for being shy and quiet, so that's how everyone
else sees me. i do think i am a lot more outgoing and loud when
i'm around people i'm comfortable with, but i try not to say
anything crazy or funny unless i'm really comfortable with them.
like you said, don't want to mess up. and it doesn't help that i
get embarrassed so easily, i hide it most of the time but omg
it's bad i'm really self-conscious and awk ward
but i have some really amazing friends and family, so i'm
okay<33 [s]coUGh COUGH RW FRIENDS toO YOU GUYS ARE WONDERFUL AND
BEAUTIFUL AND<3333[/s]
that's part of why i love the internet, bc i can say what i
wanna say and i don't have to deal with the awkwardness and
fast-thinking in irl conversations. i'm just really stupid when
it comes to words and i'm not just saying that to be modest okay
ik
aND ABOUT THAT PET GROOMING OR SHELTER THING SAME HEREE
i rlly wanna do something with animals like that's all i wanna
do
or maybe just with dogs bc i love them so much. like even if it
doesn't take much to make me cry, sad dog stories are one of my
weak points
except i can't be a doctor or a vet that's too scary and aah
either that
or something with computers bc that usually means less talking
and human interaction haha
but that is a really smart idea i hope that happens and we can
support you and your shelter mkay
about the fleas and vegetable oil
i'm really sorry
i hate fleas omg we get them pretty bad at my house during the
summer, at least with my dog
and isn't vegetable oil in a ton of recipes?? like i'm sorry
ouch
[s]random interruption bc mY FOOT IS REALLY NUMB UGH[/s]
and about the bullies and stuff
you're amazin g???
like anyone who has been bullied or stands up to a bully i
really respect bc i've never really been bullied, at least not
directly made fun of and i'm really sensitive anyway so it'd be
a nightmare for me
so yeah
you're perfect
you were before that but you know
[s]also i just wanna say that i love when you guys go on talking
about yourselves. like don't feel bad or self-centered bc i love
getting to know you guys without having to asks questions like a
creep.[/s]
#Post#: 56660--------------------------------------------------
Re: i'm tired
By: Raven` Date: July 10, 2015, 5:34 pm
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YES YES HUNNY ITS MY FACE
&& thanks <333 i don't know why, but seeing "you're gorgeous"
from someone like you (someone i've known for years, and only
known for their words and phrases and likes??) makes me feel
really happy and fuzzy inside. of course i feel really happy
when other people say it, but its like?? the fact that this is
the first time you've ever seen my face, and your first reaction
is that?? that makes me hella happy dawny. i'm gonna hug you
now. *hugz*
&& i agree with the whole bonding thing. like, for years we've
all known and judged one another based on typed words alone, and
i for one think that's a great way to start things off because
like... urg words.
well, i should start by saying that i know that when i meet
people irl, the first thing i notice is their appearance and
voice. how they carry themselves, et cetera. but since i can't
observe that with you guys, i can just skip that step and
observe whats more important, your personalities. and... well
i'm hella happy that this is the way we met.
anyways, showing one another our faces would be showing trust
and such like??? wow omg you trust me with yoUR FACE?? THATS
AMazE.
but of course i won't push anyone to do it if they ain't
comfortable.
but it would make everything feel so real like?? that is a perso
n?? pe rsonb ehin d th e scre en? is th isr eal!?
[s]flip phones still exist what[/s] but yeah i agree those flip
phone cameras do suck ugh. i remember ages ago when i tried to
take a picture of my dog with my mom's flip phone and it looked
like three pixels of blur like?? flip phone step up your game.
anyways dawny hunny, i would think about your parents first, and
think logically before posting your face. not because any of us
are perverts or anything of the sort, but because this is the
internet. once a picture is posted, it cannot be deleted from
the database, et cetera. my way of thinking when i posted was
that both my instagram and facebook are open to the public, and
both have my face and name on them so what would posting here
hurt?
anyways, just think it through. maybe write a long thought out
post with the picture so that you can think about it a little
more before you post, or something.
[s]mm ipods. they're practically phones at this point tbh[/s]
on to shyness: tbh dawny although i do see you as shy and you
have told stories that have to do with being shy i still see you
as hella outgoing? well, maybe not hella, but just about. it
might be the way you carry yourself on here or something? idk.
but i still see the shyness in you so. meh.
i guess the most i could say is that you could work towards
breaking out of the shy shell? i know it sounds hard, and it is
harder than it sounds. but, meh. its always worth a shot when
you have time & are willing ;3
[s]tbh earlier i was thinking about how irl conversations are so
weird and probably straining to the brain? like, you're talking
to someone. your brain is processing what they said while trying
to find a response. and then finding words for that response to
say once they're done?!?? like holy hell brain calm yourself[/s]
but yeah texting/internet convos are not so draining i love them
so much
i'm nervous about the vet part but?? i think of it more as
possibly saving a cutie's life than staring at a doggy spleed
half of the procedure. :U
& i think there are some computer like jobs in the animal
business? they're probably mostly doing with money managing or
answering emails or such. idk really. i never really looked into
it.
[s]become a part of my shelter community mkay[/s]
we tend to get hella fleas during the winter here, bc its warmer
inside and stuff like that. but the worse it gets its that i'm
really itchy and covered in hives. sometimes i itch too much and
i end up with a temporary scar. if you look close enough at my
arms or legs, you can see slightly lighter spots of skin :p
& i can eat things that are cooked it vegetable oil, and even
touch it. but if there's a lot of it/its on my skin for too long
i get an extremely red rash that itches ugh. sometimes i eat
food that was cooked in it/with it, and the corners of my mouth,
lips, or finger tips get rlly red ugh.
mhm thank you thank you
but i guess i should add/reiterate that like, although i stood
up against my bully & found brighter paths, i did cry when my
friend ditched me because of my shoes, and i did feel down
sometimes when i was bullied. i had friends and family to cheer
me up and stuff but still. i don't want to make myself out to be
superwoman. i don't want to seem like a mary sue irl vuv
but yeah. standing up to bullies is hard. i'm actually really
happy that you don't have to worry about them, seeing as you're
homeschooled.
[s]sometimes i feel hella conceited but psh i am
but i second that
i love learning more about you all and your pasts and your
family, even if any of that information is negative. it all
shaped you into being who you are now, and its fun to think
about.
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