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#Post#: 108368--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: JCFC
Date: July 4, 2026, 5:29 pm
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BEWARE OF THE DOGgerel
My legs and lungs both lacked the power
To make the trek up to Hall Bower.
The bus it was that took the strain
(The 341 to Ashes Lane.)
Alighting there I quickly found
My way to Newsome Panthers' ground.
There still remained a good half hour
But views of the Victoria Tower
Perched finger-like on Castle Hill
Made this no hardship. Better still,
Looking Northwards, out and down
Gave vistas of the nearest town:
In all its glory was revealed
The splendour that is Huddersfield.
The teams warmed up, the toss was done
So we could have some Rugby fun.
Eight couplets! That's enough of those.
I'll write about the match in prose.
Saturday 4th July 2026
Conference 2, Yorkshire B
Newsome Panthers 22 v 12 Featherstone Lions
Admission £2, Raffle £1
Dougie Martin.
Lions were top of the division, Panthers second, just two points
behind, so the choice of referee will have been made with that
in mind. RL referees seem a pleasant bunch and as JCFC
approached, he again received a friendly greeting, allowing him
to discover what the initial D stood for. Despite his amiable
demeanour, Mr Martin looked experienced and sturdy enough to
cope well - and so it proved.
To complete the picture, Newsome were in purple, Featherstone in
shirts predominantly white, but with very narrow well-spaced
navy hoops. Mr Martin wore the back and white striped Ronseal
shirt.
The ground slopes end to end and side to side, particularly
towards the bottom corner. Unusually I stationed myself against
the rails behind the top end, which afforded further great views
across the Holme Valley to the Moors beyond. Unfortunately the
views of the bottom end, which saw a lot of the play, were less
good. Newsome, playing down the slope, applied pressure, but
were held by the Lions defence, while Featherstone attacks too
often ended with handling errors. Mr Martin called the home
number 7 for a ticking-off for speaking out of turn. On 25
minutes, Panthers had a penalty near the Lions line and opted to
kick the two points to get on the scoreboard (not that there was
one!) Thus inspired, three minutes later they lifted a short
kick towards the corner, Featherstone fumbled, Newsome collected
and went over for a converted try. Five minutes later,
Featherstone went over in the corner. The kick was a decent
effort, but was adjudged to have missed. A further Newsome try
and conversion took the score to 14-4 at half-time.
The Lions reduced the deficit within two minutes, a try again in
their right corner going unconverted. A promising Panthers
attack was halted by a minor off the ball contretemps,
comfortably dealt with by Mr Martin. On 56 minutes, came the
best team passing move to extend Newsome's lead to 20-8, still
only two converted tries clear. So it remained until the 75th
minute, when a Lions drop-out was played before it had travelled
the requisite distance, at which point Newsome took the
insurance option of the two points that would mean Lions had to
score three times. In stoppage time the visitors did add a
further four points with their third try. A minute later they
threatened again with a long burst, the player being held town
by an opponent, leading to a yellow card for Newsome, but no
further scoring.
The ground is some 600 feet above sea level and JCFC and the
local spectators had come prepared for the wind and second half
mizzle, though those from the flatlands of Featherstone had not.
The attendance was quite good, a hundred and .... at guess. At
least five dogs were there, one busily engaged at the end in
getting to know another very intimately. (I believe that the
official explanation to young children is "the one at the front
has hurt its leg and the one at the back is pushing it to the
hospital.")
Cave canem:
Your luck's run out, it's getting worse
Once more I shall resort to verse.
Without a bus to take me back
I set off on the narrow track,
But near the steps down to the street
A large dog charged me off my feet.
Well nearly, but a handy wall
Prevented quite a nasty fall.
So, undeterred I hurried down
To find a bus stop into town.
The wait was shorter than I feared:
At once a 306 appeared.
A quick change to the 254
Enabled me to reach my door
With time to brew a tea, then catch
The Canada Morocco match.
#Post#: 108384--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: JCFC
Date: July 4, 2026, 5:56 pm
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As a result of this match, Newsome draw level on points with
Featherstone, and move to the top of the table, having a
markedly better points difference.
#Post#: 108407--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: JCFC
Date: July 5, 2026, 1:42 am
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This match prompted two further thoughts.
1. Panthers v Lions. Disliking as I do the apparently obligatory
addition of invented nicknames to traditional clubs, (I lost
interest in my own team when they were ridiculously rebranded as
Barracudas), I would love to see a requirement that such
appendages should be cuddly, or at least harmless. Halifax
Hamsters v Keighley Kittens, anyone? Or Castleford Canaries v
Batley Budgerigars?
2. One elderly Featherstone supporter kept encouraging his team
with "It's like taking spice from a baby." Spice, in this
context, was the Yorkshire term, remembered from my youth, which
was used for any form of sweets. In a similar way, a friend from
East Lancashire used "toffees" as a generic term, while in
Scotland "jujubes" was similarly used. For antiques experts, the
term is "bonbons." Do other areas have their own such terms?
#Post#: 108420--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: Lanyardhater
Date: July 5, 2026, 4:53 am
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“. . . like taking candy from a baby”. (Len Barry, ‘1-2-3’,
which members of a certain vintage may recall reached number 3
in the ‘Hit Parade’ in 1965).
#Post#: 108823--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: gooner
Date: July 10, 2026, 7:33 am
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--- Quote from: JCFC link ---
>
> I believe that the official explanation to young children is
"the one at the front has hurt its leg and the one at the back
is pushing it to the hospital."
>
--- End Quote ---
hi,
back in the 70s i bought an album by the band caravan, called
'blind dog at st. dunstans'. questioning the title i discovered
the following...
The title comes from a Noël Coward explanation to a child for
why one dog had mounted another: one dog was blind and the other
was pushing him to St. Dunstan's. The cover notes gives special
thanks to Coward. At the end of the song "Jack and Jill",
amongst dogs barking, two speaking voices can be heard:
First voice: "What are those two doggies doing over there?"
Second voice "Well, the doggie in front is blind and his friend
behind is pushing him all the way to St Dunstan's"
btw: i too was brought up with 'taking sweets from a baby'
regards,
gnr
#Post#: 108881--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: JCFC
Date: July 11, 2026, 4:36 pm
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The choice of game was a no-brainer: Moldgreen and Keighley
Albion were top on 21 points, Mirfield Spartans third, two
points behind, but with two games in hand. Spartans were
unbeaten since the first match of the season, so a win for them
at Keighley would virtually scupper Albion's title chances. Once
bitten, twice shy, I checked Albion's Facebook and found that
this time the game was indeed at Crossflatts. Not only that, but
there was to be a full day's programme of events, with no charge
for admission. As a result, entrance was direct to the ground,
rather than through the cricket club. It will doubtless astonish
you that JCFC gave the bouncy castles a miss and headed straight
to the ice-cream van.
Saturday 11th July 2026
Conference 2 Yorkshire A
Keighley Albion 26 v 10 Mirfield Spartans
Karl Robinson.
The pitch has a pronounced, but not excessive slope down from
the clubhouse end. Albion were in charcoal, with a thin red and
white chevron front and back; Spartans in all darkish green. Mr
Robinson opted for the splendid cornflower blue with black
stripes. Though not one of the very young officials (he was
quite tall and had a respectable beard), he was still equipped
with headcam.
The pitch was hard, making the bounce from kicks very
unpredictable, both in direction and in height, a couple of
times bouncing clear over the waiting receiver. Mirfield,
playing down the slope, looked the likelier side, but Albion
defended stoutly and it was not until the tenth minute that
Mirfield went over in the corner, the ensuing kick hitting the
wrong side of the post. As tends to happen, I missed the try as
the raffle ticket seller arrived at just the wrong moment. As
she proclaimed "a pound a strip," the gentleman beside me, who
had bought his earlier, very ungallantly asked whether if he
gave her the pound, would she keep her clothes on? A high tackle
on 24 minutes led to a brief gathering of the clans, quickly
sorted by Mr Robinson. On the half hour, Albion were deep in
Spartans territory on the fifth tackle,when a crossfield kick
was tapped on twice allowing the home number 4 to score in the
corner, a well-shaped kick from the touchline going over off the
far post to put Keighley 6-4 ahead. So it remained until the
first minute of added time, when a long break saw the Albion
full back held just short, but the play-the-ball led to a second
Albion try, easily converted, extending their lead to 12-4 at
the interval.
Four minutes after the restart a towering kick to the corner was
fumbled and regained by Albion to add a further four points.
Mirfield came back with a converted try just before the hour, to
reach double figures. Albion had a man sent to the sin-bin on 65
minutes for a high tackle - there had been many already,
correctly penalised by Mr Robinson - but this was a more
dangerous one, though no major damage was done. This might have
been dangerous for Albion, but in his absence they added a
further try, with another excellent conversion giving them a
two- score cushion. To make things ultra safe they attempted a
drop goal four minutes into stoppage time. It was wide but it
mattered not, as a minute later they added a final unconverted
try in the corner.
It had been a terrific match: some nifty half back play,
bullocking runs met with ferocious tackling and the odd mistake
thrown in for good measure, played for the most part in a
sporting manner. Players of both sides will certainly know they
have been in a match. Even Mr Robinson, who handled the match
well, will probably have been glad to blow the final whistle.
This result, together with a win for Moldgreen now sees them
both four points ahead of Mirfield, who still have the two
matches in hand, however.
A bus turned up immediately to whisk me back to Bradford and I
was home by 17.37
#Post#: 109021--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: Lanyardhater
Date: July 13, 2026, 5:25 am
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I’ve been thinking about the “Blind Dog at St.Dunstan’s”. (Well
I’m sorry but there it is).
Ever logical from a tender age apparently (as many young
children annoyingly are), I might well have said to Mr. Coward:
“Well they’d better get a move on. They’ve been on the same
spot for the last five minutes” !
#Post#: 109035--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: gooner
Date: July 13, 2026, 10:24 am
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--- Quote from: Lanyardhater link ---
>
> I’ve been thinking about the “Blind Dog at St.Dunstan’s”.
>
--- End Quote ---
hi,
you really do need to seriously consider getting that tv
fixed!!! [emoji6]
regards,
gnr
#Post#: 109053--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: Lanyardhater
Date: July 13, 2026, 3:43 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Yes gnr, you’re absolutely right of course. At least you were
polite enough not to say “You need to get a life” - and I thank
you for that!
Regards,
Lnh
#Post#: 109351--------------------------------------------------
Re: Back to my first love
DIR By: JCFC
Date: July 18, 2026, 5:16 pm
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The fixture list today was very sparse and I did not risk a long
trip in search of pastures new, settling for a return visit to a
fairly local ground. Not that this went as smoothly as hoped:
road works meant a couple of major diversions. At the time we
should have been leaving Dewsbury bus station, we were
approaching Heckmondwike, where we shouldn't have been at all.
Nevertheless, I arrived with a quarter of an hour to spare at
Saturday 18th July 2026
National Conference Division 1
Shaw Cross Sharks 6 v 30 Dewsbury Moor Maroons
Matty Clayton (Huddersfield); S. Helme, Xander Helme.
As previously noted, the pitch, fully railed at a comfortable
height, is situated on an extensive grassed area beside the
road. There is another pitch (last year occupied by a funfair),
which looked to be playing host to a junior tournament, drawing
many spectators, though this seemed to finish sadly, with an
ambulance being called. The clubhouse is a short distance away,
along a path, but containers on site provided the basic
necessities, with refreshment hut and portaloos. In addition,
this time there were added stalls and an ice cream van
(surprisingly unpatronised by JCFC.)
There was time to glean from Touch Judge 1 that his S stood for
Stuart - with a U, "the proper way" he claimed. With his
Scottish forebears, JCFC was inclined to differ, though come to
think of it, the only person in my family tree with the
Christian name Stewart, (born in Minnigaff, I believe) was
actually female - Mr Helme clearly was not! His hairstyle - or
rather lack thereof - showed that any idea that he might be
young Xander's kid brother, were clearly wide of the mark.
There is no possibility of charging for admission, so JCFC was
happy to pay £3 for a raffle ticket and "programme" (a
colourful, glossy A4 card with lists of players from each side
but nothing else) in lieu.
The pitch was parched, with large straw-coloured areas. Sharks
were in red shirts with narrower bands of thin yellow in a black
sandwich, Maroons, naturally, in maroon, with a solid yellow V
at the chest. Perfectly distinguishable in the sunshine, but not
the easiest of watches. Mr Clayton, still quite young-looking in
a short and stocky frame, again sported the vibrant cornflower
blue with black stripes; the touch judges being in a plain
lighter blue (myosotis?)
And so, at last, to the match. Sharks were held up over the
line, but could not take advantage of their strong opening
minutes. It was 8 minutes before Maroons managed an attack with
their captain querying something with Mr Clayton when nothing
came of it. Three minutes later they put a high kick deep into
Sharks territory, where it was knocked on by the would-be
catcher, the possession from the resulting "scrum" leading all
too easily to a try (converted.) The lead was doubled to twelve
points on 16 minutes, but things stabilised and the next score
did not come until just before the break, when the Maroons on
their final tackle put in a neat kick to create a third try,
well converted to make the half time score 0-18.
So it remained throughout the third quarter, with the Sharks
number 13 being sin-binned on the hour. Despite his absence,
Sharks finally scored a try and added the conversion, but by
this stage the result was not really in doubt, Maroons finished
things off with two more converted tries - one on 78 minutes,
the other after seven minutes of added time.
Mr Clayton is one of the more highly-rated officials, and it was
not hard to understand why. He has a strong voice and uses it
confidently. There was one brief contretemps when the visiting
number 1 over-reacted to a tackle. Mr Clayton had a brief word
with his touch judge, a longer one with the Maroons captain,
restarting with the penalty for the visitors. Nothing to trouble
him in a game in which he was very consistent in penalising head
tackles - and pleasingly so for offside at play the balls. An
accomplished afternoon's work.
Though a division above last week's match, it was not quite as
exciting. Credit to both teams, however, for their discipline.
It is wonderful to see hard tackles being accepted with no
yelping and no writhing. Would that round-ball players behaved
similarly.
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