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       #Post#: 5710--------------------------------------------------
       thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: donenot
       Date: June 18, 2022, 7:02 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       To whom I'm unconcerned,
       New topic cause I picked some ideas from different posts and
       tried to put them a flow; or I'm too lazy to jump from quote to
       quote
       Whois: “live the life you have, and things will fall in their
       place”
       That’s a dead end.
       I see Plato agrees with whois while Fritz finds it ridiculous.
       It’s quite a family you have here…
       I don’t know how I could not live my life. It would make sense
       to me if what whois is actually talking about is the attitude
       toward the things happening here.
       Inner life against outer life. To me all is “inner life”, I see
       a tiny bit of attitude in even the most trivial aspect, like
       feeling my weight on the chair I’m sitting on, or knowing that
       1+1=2 – basically meaningless to the inner life, yet reassuring
       somehow since 1+1 will always give 2.
       What I get from “live your life” is I should change my attitude
       but I shouldn’t really change it...
       I see this “forget about it” as the scorpion that killed the
       frog it was riding but somehow managed to get to the river bank
       and didn’t drown. Now he’s warning the other scorpions “don’t
       cross the river, you’ll kill the frog and drown!” when all the
       scorpions are already up on their frogs, distilling poison.
       “things will fall in their place” – life showed me that things
       will happen the way they will happen no matter what I think or
       feel about them.
       Which brings me to Plato's emotional/feeling requirement. I
       guess I’m sort of zombified myself because of the above, kind of
       phased out, I don’t expect much from life.
       I used to paint as a hobby in the past –when the work was done
       it was puzzling to see how my painting appeared alien to me.
       Needless to mention the praise expectations, and also the
       dismissal of the others’ opinions – good or bad. Ridiculous.
       That’s about how life is to me when I’m not in the “spur of the
       moment.” Sort of alien, abstract.
       Yeah, yeah, I know, “what about some real hurting, like cancer
       or smashing your head against the wall! Not so abstract, hm?”
       Is this in any way more joyful? I guess not.
       Makes me wonder, am I a candidate for SA with my apathetic
       attitude? When all I see is ego – there isn’t an I and my ego –
       I am the ego -  the final truth of self honesty would be to shut
       the f-ck up, from where there is no further.
       And yet, here I am talking to myself, wondering in some corner
       of my mind about what would people say. This bivalence,
       trivalence, etc, gives me a puking sensation in my throat. Aaand
       it passed.
       Joanna was saying something about the ego that wants to die, to
       which I promptly replied that the ego’s essence is
       resisting/maintaining so it would never want to die. I need to
       reconsider a bit: yes, the ego may come to the conclusion that
       he should die, but in fact it would come to any conclusion as
       long as he finds something to do.
       Some guys dealing with art therapy for the mentally ill [sorry,
       no hard evidence again and again] said that schizophrenic people
       don’t leave any empty space in their painting – a void
       intolerance. Kind of like the ego, fill in the blanks, be it a
       praise or a curse, just fill it.
       I’ve interacted 3 times with the IGF Jed. First time I got
       banned, a platitude the second time, and the last time he told
       me to concentrate with all my might on the field where
       perceptions manifest. Rrrrocket fuel:
       The old shut the f-ck up…
       #Post#: 5715--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: Joanna
       Date: June 18, 2022, 3:46 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       --- Quote from: donenot link ---
       >
       >
       > I see Plato agrees with whois while Fritz finds it ridiculous.
       It’s quite a family you have here…
       >
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       At the same time Plato agrees with Frits on disagreeing with
       Joanna. Who is whois's supposed alter ego, but they disagree
       with each other. Real soap opera ;P
       Good thing we're all enlightened here or it would be a mess 8)
       #Post#: 5717--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: Plato
       Date: June 18, 2022, 4:24 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       --- Quote from: Joanna link ---
       >
       > [quote author=donenot link=topic=201.msg5710#msg5710
       date=1655553746]
       >
       > I see Plato agrees with whois while Fritz finds it ridiculous.
       It’s quite a family you have here…
       >
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       At the same time Plato agrees with Frits on disagreeing with
       Joanna. Who is whois's supposed alter ego, but they disagree
       with each other. Real soap opera ;P
       Good thing we're all enlightened here or it would be a mess 8)
       [/quote]
       I'm an equal opportunity purveyor of comments, I have agreed and
       disagreed with everyone in here, depends upon the current
       thought process of the individual not their "personality" which
       I must admit, can be challenging at times, anyone's personality
       can. So, try to understand that I am responding to thoughts
       "people" have, I've never kicked anyone off this site for the
       simple reason that I believe anyone who is here, is here to
       learn and grow from the group and also contribute, that can be
       messy. There is a lot of experience here and anyone who has
       spent a significant amount of time here will attest that there
       can be tremendous wisdom in any voice.
       That being said, it is very much like a family, many of us have
       been through hell and back together in here, Thanksgiving in
       here is a beeotch!
       #Post#: 5718--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: Joanna
       Date: June 19, 2022, 4:26 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       --- Quote from: donenot link ---
       >
       > Makes me wonder, am I a candidate for SA with my apathetic
       attitude?
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       Reminds me of the time when I was trying to keep my ego alive by
       writing pages and pages of affirmations like "my life has
       meaning". Spoiler alert, didn't work ;P What I needed to do was
       to accept the fact that the life as I knew it was coming to an
       end and let myself mourn it. Tears are the best solvent.
       "Sell the house. Sell the car. Sell the kids. Find someone else.
       Forget it. I'm never coming back."
       I'd say don't leave it. Mourn it. And then whatever stays stays.
       Whatever goes goes. Whatever comes comes.
       #Post#: 5719--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: Joanna
       Date: June 19, 2022, 5:56 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       --- Quote from: donenot link ---
       >
       > Joanna was saying something about the ego that wants to die,
       to which I promptly replied that the ego’s essence is
       resisting/maintaining so it would never want to die.
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       The tragic situation of ego. The thing it fears the most and the
       thing it longs for the most are the same thing. Own death.
       #Post#: 5720--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: Frits Snips
       Date: June 19, 2022, 1:46 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       --- Quote from: Joanna link ---
       >
       > [quote author=donenot link=topic=201.msg5710#msg5710
       date=1655553746]
       > Joanna was saying something about the ego that wants to die,
       to which I promptly replied that the ego’s essence is
       resisting/maintaining so it would never want to die.
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       The tragic situation of ego. The thing it fears the most and the
       thing it longs for the most are the same thing. Own death.
       [/quote]
       Funny how you have no idea what you're talking about, absolutely
       no sense of what "ego" actually is and how it works.
       #Post#: 5721--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: rgardner
       Date: June 19, 2022, 3:38 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Frits, you have no accepted authority to call out anyone's views
       or perceptions as false.  In fact, you said you were leaving
       this site, only to return as an antagonist.  Of course, my ego
       conflicts with your "ego". ;D
       #Post#: 5722--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: Frits Snips
       Date: June 19, 2022, 6:10 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       --- Quote from: rgardner link ---
       >
       > Frits, you have no accepted authority to call out anyone's
       views or perceptions as false.  In fact, you said you were
       leaving this site, only to return as an antagonist.  Of course,
       my ego conflicts with your "ego". ;D
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       Like I said before — but hey, you never listen, do you? — I
       wasn't leaving, just taking a breather. And I don't need an
       "accepted authority" to state the obvious.
       Man, I understand you are trying to reclaim your status on this
       forum, but this is not the way.
       #Post#: 5723--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: Joanna
       Date: June 20, 2022, 6:39 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       --- Quote from: Frits Snips link ---
       >
       > [quote author=Joanna link=topic=201.msg5719#msg5719
       date=1655636180]
       > [quote author=donenot link=topic=201.msg5710#msg5710
       date=1655553746]
       > Joanna was saying something about the ego that wants to die,
       to which I promptly replied that the ego’s essence is
       resisting/maintaining so it would never want to die.
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       The tragic situation of ego. The thing it fears the most and the
       thing it longs for the most are the same thing. Own death.
       [/quote]
       Funny how you have no idea what you're talking about, absolutely
       no sense of what "ego" actually is and how it works.
       [/quote]
       If I were you I would contemplate the difference between
       closed-hearted "i don't care" and open-hearted "i don't mind".
       You may find your lost ego.
       #Post#: 5724--------------------------------------------------
       Re: thinking the unthinkable
   DIR By: donenot
       Date: June 21, 2022, 5:50 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       --- Quote from: whois link ---
       >
       >
       > Donenot, have you been diagnosed with schizophrenia
       >
       > or
       >
       > was it temporary psychosis?
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       well, they didn't caught us yet! not guilty of schizzo, until
       proven .. haha, that would be a surprise!
       and temporary psychosis - what raised the alarm?
       --- Quote ---
       >
       > The inner world might be infinitely more interesting and (more
       importantly) understandable. Which makes it SAFE, much safer
       than any unexpected events in that big wide world out there. We
       all know it is not 100% safe, although from my life experience..
       it is much safer than people imagine it to be in their minds.
       >
       > But this tendency for the inner exploration also traps one
       inside, with no impetus to move, no interest towards life at
       large, the gripping indifference, the permanent void of 'no
       life'. It's a struggle.
       >
       > 'a sense of self-importance + fear' can destroy any chance of
       independent living.
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       some things are obvious to some while being alien to others.
       you emphasize here the negative aspects of life which may get
       one on the gloomy side.
       good things can do that too... oh crap, i won't go into 'all is
       suffering'
       i will say this: give me a little of this, and a little of that,
       not too much, and not to little, and i'll get cozy, happpyy,
       forgetful, numb. the devil is most efficacious in small dosages.
       --- Quote ---
       >
       > I am not saying this to insult you in any way. You have
       humility as I noted before, and this is appreciated much here.
       You made a lot of good points. My question is.. why did you come
       to consider self inquiry (SA if you wish, but I expressed my
       opinion on the term)?
       >
       --- End Quote ---
       ok, i may be chicken but you're not calling it.
       why i came to shelf inquiry (although i think we should give
       credit to the man's literary expression) as a method? i don't
       see the point of this question - don't you know who i am?
       donenot
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