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#Post#: 903--------------------------------------------------
Re: Up To Three Lines
DIR By: Pizmit
Date: February 13, 2013, 6:40 pm
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My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, "This
will make you happy tonight." He was right. When he went out of
the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs. He couldn't
get back in.
#Post#: 1014--------------------------------------------------
Re: Up To Three Lines
DIR By: Pizmit
Date: February 16, 2013, 2:54 pm
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A guy goes into a bar and says to the bartender, "Man, I'm dying
to have sex in the worst way. So the bartender says, "Well, the
worst way I know of is standing up in a hammock."
#Post#: 1016--------------------------------------------------
Re: Up To Three Lines
DIR By: Pizmit
Date: February 16, 2013, 2:56 pm
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A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you
the happiest woman in the world" The woman says, "I'll miss
you."
#Post#: 1017--------------------------------------------------
Re: Up To Three Lines
DIR By: Pizmit
Date: February 16, 2013, 2:56 pm
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Jack is on his death bed, and he says to his wife, "Can you give
me one last wish?" She says, "Anything you want." He says,
"After I die, will you marry Larry?" She says, "But I thought
you hated Larry." With his last breath, he says, "I do."
#Post#: 1054--------------------------------------------------
Re: Up To Three Lines
DIR By: Pizmit
Date: February 16, 2013, 3:21 pm
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What is the difference between a sin and shame?
It's a sin to stick it in and a shame to take it out.
#Post#: 1606--------------------------------------------------
Re: Up To Three Lines
DIR By: Pizmit
Date: February 28, 2013, 2:37 pm
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A guy calls the hospital. He says, "You gotta send help! My
wife's going into labor!" The nurse says, "Calm down. Is this
her first child?" He says, "No! This is her freaking husband!"
#Post#: 1613--------------------------------------------------
Re: Up To Three Lines
DIR By: Pizmit
Date: February 28, 2013, 2:43 pm
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An elderly man goes into a brothel and tells the madam he would
like a young girl for the night. Surprised, she looks at the
ancient man and asks how old he is. "I'm 90 years old," he says.
"90!" replies the woman. "Don't you realize you've had it?" "Oh,
sorry," says the old man, "how much do I owe you?"
#Post#: 1614--------------------------------------------------
Re: Up To Three Lines
DIR By: Pizmit
Date: February 28, 2013, 2:43 pm
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"I can't find a cause for your illness," the doctor said.
"Frankly, I think it's due to drinking." "In that case," replied
his patient, "I'll come back when you are sober."
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