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#Post#: 927--------------------------------------------------
Reading People?
By: notme Date: July 9, 2013, 3:44 am
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This is somewhat on the same thread that Red was discussing in
the Regarding Emotions topic only his was about empathy whereas
mine is about my seeming inability to read people's emotions. I
can read basic emotions, I can tell when someone is happy or sad
or worried, but I can't read more complex ones. Specifically
flirting. I can very rarely tell if someone is flirting with me
so I usually assume that no one is, but today I got into a bit
of an argument with Shyanne. She insists that people flirt with
me and I insist that they don't. I don't mean to say that I've
never been flirted with, I have and I've been able to tell in
those situations but usually the one doing the flirting has been
over the top and obvious in their approach. I can tell when my
friends are being flirted with but I can't tell when it's
happening to me. And flirting isn't the only thing I have
trouble reading it just makes the best example. I don't know
maybe this brain spew is what comes from watching a lot of Lie
to Me and Bones in one day, what do you guys think?
#Post#: 929--------------------------------------------------
Re: Reading People?
By: Red Date: July 9, 2013, 11:12 am
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I'm kind of in the same boat as you, but maybe it's just my
naivete. Heathcliff does the same thing, where she thinks a ton
of people are flirting with someone even if they're just saying
hi or something, and honestly, I feel like that's a little
extreme. It's my notion that not everyone wants to get in
everyone's pants, so I tend to think that just a simple
conversation isn't flirting. My definition of the word seems to
outline a more obvious approach: complimenting people repeatedly
or asking questions regarding relationships/swoodilypooping.
Now, maybe this is a childish perspective, but if someone comes
to me and has a conversation with me about the weather, they're
friendly. If someone asks me what I do late at night by myself,
they're trying to get into my pants, or if they're saying that
I'm so awesome and should be put in a museum, they're trying to
go out with me at the very least.
I think that overall, flirting is a subjective term. Your friend
is probably just shipping you with people.
#Post#: 935--------------------------------------------------
Re: Reading People?
By: MisterCuttlefish Date: July 10, 2013, 10:41 pm
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ahaha u v u; oh man okay i hope no one gets mad at me
People flirt with you just because they can, it means they like
you or find you attractive or probably want to be your friend.
Sometimes its just how people open up to others-idk how that
works im not one of those people but i know quite a few
Flirting isn't always supposed to be obvious, sometimes its
blunt joking that could or could not "go somewhere" based on the
other person's reaction. That's why, in school or in the work
place, unwanted flirting is deemed as sexual harassment because
it's invading a personal bubble by covering it with a playful
tone or somewhat-appropriate language.
Flirting is definitely a wide range of things, verbal and
nonverbal communication. Body language can be considered
"flirting", and it isn't anything like winking or liking their
lips. Normally, flirting is: laughing hard at someone's joke, a
light touch/brush, eye contact, and any generally non-obvious
action. Because seriously, its easy to see it if you're not
talking to the person flirting with you. What they're doing is
hoping you'll flirt back, or make actions that look like you're
interested too. In which case, they will move up in their
approach to woo you.
and then the sex happens (or normally doesnt but anyway)
People don't have to have that lustful look in their eyes to
flirt with you hahah and its okay if you don't see it, its
pretty normal not to actually
they know. u v u
#Post#: 938--------------------------------------------------
Re: Reading People?
By: Red Date: July 11, 2013, 6:37 am
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Idk, maybe if there's an ulterior motive, but I wouldn't
consider wanting to be someone's friend as flirting. Typically,
as I believe I mentioned before, there seems to be a romantic
motive, so unless friendship is amorously romantic, I don't know
if it'd equate to flirting.
[quote]
flirting - present participle of flirt (Verb)
Verb
Behave as though attracted to or trying to attract someone,
but without serious intentions: "it amused him to flirt with
her".
Experiment with or show a superficial interest in (an idea,
activity, or movement) without committing oneself to it
seriously.
[/quote]
Google seems to agree with you, though Wikipedia touches more on
my perception, I think:
[quote]
Flirting or coquetry is a social and sometimes sexual activity
involving verbal or written communication as well as body
language by one person to another, suggesting an interest in a
deeper relationship with the other person.
[/quote]
They also clearly state some ways that flirting is executed,
albeit in reality, at various levels of intensity.
[quote]
Banter
Blowing a kiss
Casual touches; such as a woman gently touching a man's arm
during conversation
Coyness, affectedly shy or modest, marked by cute,
coquettish, or artful playfulness (e.g. pickup lines).
Eye contact, batting eyelashes, staring, winking, etc.
Flattery (regarding beauty, sexual attractiveness)
Footsie, a form of flirtation in which people use their feet
to play with each other's feet.
Giggling, or laughing encouragingly at any slight hint of
intimacy in the other's behavior
Imitating of behaviors (e.g. taking a drink when the other
person takes a drink, changing posture as the other does, etc.)
Maintaining very short distance during casual talking.
Online chat, texting, and other one-on-one and direct
messaging services while hinting affection
Protean signals, such as touching one's hair
Sending notes, poems, or small gifts
Singing specially selected love songs in presence of the
girl/boy.
Smiling suggestively
Staging of "chance" encounters
Teasing
Tickling
Winking
Eyebrow raising
[/quote]
#Post#: 939--------------------------------------------------
Re: Reading People?
By: Red Date: July 11, 2013, 6:51 am
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Additionally:
HTML http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-Flirt_Club
#Post#: 940--------------------------------------------------
Re: Reading People?
By: MisterCuttlefish Date: July 11, 2013, 7:03 pm
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whoa slow down friend
lets bring the worst possible thing into this: Homestuck (only
for the sake of discussion gomengomen)
[list]
[li]they're the red quadrants[/li]
[li]they're similar, but mistakable for each other[/li]
[li]friendship isn't considered an emotion but a bond and so is
love if you think about it[/li]
[/list]
and anyway, people just tend to do weird shit idk how you make
friends, i make friends by not saying anything and casually
hoping they might talk to me/have something in common we can
chat about
i care for my friends, better friends i care for more than
regular acquaintance friends and i generally enjoy hanging out
with my better friends than those ones so it kind of falls into
the catagory of love depending on how you view relationships
like
ex1)when two people break up:
person a: "im breaking up with you, but can we still be
friends?"
moving on to a later date and-
ex2)a friend asks about person b:
person a: "well i still care about them, but it isn't quite
romantic anymore. more sibling-y"
the point is are we arguing or are we just compiling a list of
ways notme is hit on?
i think its the latter, but maybe you're trying to convince me
that when notme and i go places where attractive people are that
they don't obviously hit on her even though im standing right
there awkwardly trying to stay in the conversation as well as
let my friend have a possible maybe romantic-like partner in the
near future idk
[quote]flirting - present participle of flirt (Verb)
Verb
Behave as though attracted to or trying to attract someone,
but without serious intentions: "it amused him to flirt with
her".
Experiment with or show a superficial interest in (an idea,
activity, or movement) without committing oneself to it
seriously.[/quote]
>no bold because self-explanatory
[quote]Flirting or coquetry is a social and sometimes sexual
activity involving verbal or written communication as well as
body language by one person to another, suggesting an interest
in a deeper relationship with the other person.[/quote]
kind of the same, i really dont think this matters though ahaha
u v u; because it would make sense for it to go either way of
our views really plus, im not here to convince you otherwise
o v o funion onion
#Post#: 943--------------------------------------------------
Re: Reading People?
By: notme Date: July 12, 2013, 1:58 am
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ok guys i get it enough
#Post#: 945--------------------------------------------------
Re: Reading People?
By: MisterCuttlefish Date: July 12, 2013, 6:14 pm
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ah a bit overboard whoops o v o; sorry notme
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