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#Post#: 1592--------------------------------------------------
Moving on (with Hannah)
DIR By: Isaac
Date: May 1, 2015, 7:31 pm
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*I ****ing deleted my perfect wall of text by accident just now,
so this is a retype and I'm ****ED! AGH!*
Edit: Hannah is currently in a relationship and has been for a
while now with someone, just to note, before any of this
happened.
Well, I feel that things with Hannah will now be ceased very
drastically if not altogether. There will be no chances with
her, nor do I wish to have chances with her anymore. These
pills have helped me completely, and I feel much more controlled
with my life. Oh right...the pills. Some of you might not know
about them, so I'll tell you. I have been taking
anxiety-relievers to obviously remove most, if not all, stress
and anxiety that I have been feeling, making me more mellow, but
to an extent...heh...I should take heavier dosages. Well
anyway, about Hannah, she had texted me, after I texted her
about my guilt that I felt for saying and doing things to her
that I should not have (for instance, I had always discussed to
her in a dark and suicidal tone whenever I had been depressed,
which was common) as well as pretty much asking her for another
hang out each weekend, and she's taken a step back from me,
mostly because she thinks I still want her to be my girlfriend,
even though she already told me no, and believe me, I respect a
person's decision on the spot, so I was fine with her saying
no.. Normally, if I had heard this w/o the pills, my heart
probably would've stopped from a broken heart, since my nerves
in general are incredibly sensitive to emotions, important
situations, and other things that'd make me jump. I...used to
not deal well with a "loss" of a friend, though she still
considers me a friend, so idk why I'm sorrowful about it. A big
fear I have, that not even the pills can relieve, is that she
won't hang out with me anymore. I usually don't mind if people
don't wish to hang out anymore, but it's just...THIS ****ing
person in general keeps me very happy and satisfied when she's
over at my house...*sigh*...I must consider how my attitude will
play out. If she actually does not wish to hang out with me
anymore, I will just revert to my colder and heartless self
again, which is a choice, not a possibility. For me, I feel
that having or showing no emotion or trying to not embrace
certain emotions will get me by in life. Love, sadness, and
loneliness are the top three I would very much live without,
even happiness if need be. I digress...well, to sum this up,
Hannah has revealed that she has taken a step back after I
apologized about my guilts of the past, and I understood, but,
still wish to know if I'll ever see her again personally, during
a hang-out. If that's not going to happen, I'll just move on
with life and forget about this year, whether it takes a pill or
not to make that work out for me...
*sigh*
I honestly and personally feel like I ****ed it up. If she
chooses to keep herself away from me, she'd be the 7th "close
friend" that's chosen to keep their distance away from me and
let things slide...
I'm fine, my heart just hurts a lot.
I just have to live with my regrets, something that is both a
burden and a lesson.
#Post#: 1593--------------------------------------------------
Re: Moving on (with Hannah) Isaac, Im so sorry ;-;
DIR By: Cyrovon
Date: May 1, 2015, 7:59 pm
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Isaac, this must be terrible for you I know you must be "Ok"
with it but seriously you put a paper over the hole in your
chest and say its "okay" Ive also been through something like
this in fact its right now. I have no friends I cant get friends
My life may be over as I know it I take depression pills I am
suicidal. I do my best to be happy and keep others happy on this
server and whoever I meet anywhere
but in the end im always alone crying myself to sleep when im
done watching Netflix alone in my empty house as my parents are
getting drunk in the bar and my brother smoking with his friends
I don't want to hear this its all ok we are all your friends :D
if not ill smack a smile on you with a Healthy doce of
FRIENDSHIP. and a nice attitude. Its ok isaaac luv u lots <3333
-Cyro <3 <3 <3 <3
#Post#: 1594--------------------------------------------------
Re: Moving on (with Hannah)
DIR By: Isaac
Date: May 1, 2015, 8:00 pm
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Thanks. I am sorry for your current situation. Friendship,
hmm. I am a friend to all who love the server, just as long as
they are respectful to others, the staff, and the server. I am
a friend of yours, of course, because again, I love all the
fellow members of Nalah's server. That outbreak was just a bad
time to have been the way you were. Please just don't do it
again.
#Post#: 1595--------------------------------------------------
Re: Moving on (with Hannah)
DIR By: CommonCloud7
Date: May 1, 2015, 8:17 pm
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Sounds like you are having a bit of a hard time. Being as young
as I am, I have never experienced love before, therefore I can't
help you.
You have been a great friend to me on the server, and I hope
that you stay here.
:)
#Post#: 1596--------------------------------------------------
Re: Moving on (with Hannah)
DIR By: ShebertLime
Date: May 2, 2015, 1:01 am
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There were a billion different ways that this situation could
go, and this is... the end of the book, as you might say. But it
might be just the end of a chapter. There might be more to this
situation, but who knows if that's true or not. Anyways, I wish
you the best of luck.
#Post#: 1597--------------------------------------------------
Re: Moving on (with Hannah)
DIR By: Nalah
Date: May 2, 2015, 9:26 am
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In the book of life, Hannah is but a paragraph. And there will
be many more where that came from.
Your life is your story, although parts of it may end sooner
than you desire..
The next chapter is always waiting for you.
Keep your head held high, you're amazing! <3
#Post#: 1599--------------------------------------------------
Re: Moving on (with Hannah)
DIR By: Isaac
Date: May 2, 2015, 9:37 am
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Heh...hahaha...your support puts a few tears to my eyes. You
care for me as that cool guy you know IRL, even though I'm just
a mere person over the internet...thank you guys.
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