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#Post#: 170--------------------------------------------------
Let's put a smile on that face!
By: mondosexguide Date: March 5, 2015, 6:06 pm
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You're welcome, guys & girls, to add a joke here!
I'll be the starter. :cool:
A doctor asks a patient while examining her:
- How many sex partners did you have?
- 5 or 6, don't remember exactly..
- Hmm, not that many...
- Yes, that wasn't the most successful weekend...
#Post#: 171--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let's put a smile on that face!
By: mondosexguide Date: March 5, 2015, 6:21 pm
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- Doc, every time after sex I hear whistle.
- What's your age?
- 70.
- You know, this is very natural. It would strange if you heard
applause...
#Post#: 172--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let's put a smile on that face!
By: mondosexguide Date: March 5, 2015, 6:21 pm
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In Angelina Jolie's home the question "Where do babies come
from" is most often asked by Brad Pitt...
#Post#: 173--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let's put a smile on that face!
By: mondosexguide Date: March 5, 2015, 6:32 pm
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A mother writes a letter to her sun, who is in a prison.
- Dear sun, life's so hard for me since they took you to a
prison: nobody digs a vegetable garden, nobody plants
potatoes...
The sun writes back to her mother:
- Mom, please stay away from the garden. If you start digging
it, the police may come and both take you to a prison and
prolong mine imprisonment..
Mother writes back to her sun:
- Darling, together with your last letter police came. They
digged all over the garden, but haven't found anything. They
left being extremely frustrated.
Sun writes his mom:
- I helped as much as I could with this. Please plant the
potatoes by yourself. :laugh:
#Post#: 174--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let's put a smile on that face!
By: nikolas Date: March 7, 2015, 5:21 am
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- Is it true that 5 minutes of laugh prolongs your life by 5
minutes?
- It depends who you are laughing at, it may as well shorten
it...
#Post#: 175--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let's put a smile on that face!
By: nikolas Date: March 7, 2015, 5:23 am
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One day during the family lunch the youngest son Paul asks his
father:
- Daddy, what is the difference between potential and reality?
Daddy turns to his wife and gives her a question:
- Would you sleep with George Clooney for 1 million $?
- Certainly, I would never waste such opportunity, tells the
wife.
Daddy turns to his teenage daughter:
- Maria, would you sleep with Brad Pitt for 1 million $?
- Surely! He is my fantasy, his posters are all over the walls
of my room.
Daddy turns to his eldest son Raul and asks:
- Would you sleep with Tom Cruise for 1 million $?
Eldest son thinks a little and replies:
- Why not? Imagine what I could do with that money. So yes, I
would sleep.
Then daddy turns back to his youngest son Paul and explains him:
- You see, Paul, potentially we are sitting with multi
millionaires but in reality we are sitting with two prostitutes
and one gay…
#Post#: 182--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let's put a smile on that face!
By: griff Date: March 12, 2015, 2:48 pm
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One more!
A girl realized that she had grown hair between her legs. She
got worried and asked her mom about that hair.
Her mom calmly said, "That part where the hair has grown is
called Monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair."... the
girl smiled.
At dinner, she told her sister, "My monkey has grown hair."
Her sister smiled and said, "That’s nothing, mine is already
eating bananas." :grin:
#Post#: 254--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let's put a smile on that face!
By: ylp06 Date: May 17, 2015, 8:12 am
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A teacher asks her class, "What do you want to be when you grow
up?"
Little Johnny says "I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most
expensive clubs, take the best bit*h with me, give her a Ferrari
worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in
Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and
to make love to her three times a day".
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad
behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he
said and then continues the lesson. "And you, Susie? " the
teacher asks. Susie says "I wanna be Johnny's bit*h."
#Post#: 255--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let's put a smile on that face!
By: ylp06 Date: May 17, 2015, 8:24 am
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A little girl and boy are fighting about the differences between
the sexes, and which one is better. Finally, the boy drops his
pants and says, “Here’s something I have that you’ll never
have!”
The little girl is pretty upset by this, since it is clearly
true, and runs home crying. A while later, she comes running
back with a smile on her face. She drops her pants and says,
“My mommy says that with one of these, I can have as many of
those as I want!”
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