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       #Post#: 1485--------------------------------------------------
       And the Dead Take it (April Fools' Day Post)
   DIR By: Clair
       Date: April 1, 2016, 12:54 pm
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       The guards at the entrance gate of Canterlot Castle crossed
       their spears to block the grey Unicorn's way as he advanced on
       them.  "Halt!" they exclaimed, clanking their spears to
       reinforce the idea that he shouldn't be crossing them.  "What
       business have you in the castle?"  He ignores them and keeps
       walking.  "Answer!" they shout at him, the Unicorn guard calling
       up a wall of magic, which the advancing Unicorn calmly passes
       through.  The guards gasp and lunge at him, attempting to
       restrain him.  Somehow their attempt falls short and they fall
       to the ground.  How could they miss such a slow moving pony?
       "Secure the gate!!" they call through, trying again and failing
       to restrain the advancing Unicorn.  Another pair of guards
       arrive as the portcullis closes behind them, brandishing their
       spears.  The advancing Unicorn ignores them, too, and the four
       jump at him, somehow completely missing him entirely and
       colliding with each other in midair.  They fall into a tangled
       heap on the ground, getting back up just in time to see him pass
       straight through the portcullis and be accosted again by the
       guards behind, with the same basic results.  The alarm is
       sounded and more of the guard mustered, a full panic taking the
       castle and the seemingly unstoppable pony making his way
       through.
       All their efforts are for naught, as he keeps advancing
       inexorably around or through every barrier in his way until he
       reaches the balcony from which the princesses customarily
       address their subjects.  He clears his throat, the sound
       magnified throughout the city, and a great hush falls over it as
       they wait for whatever was coming.  After a long moment of
       silence, he speaks in a low rumble.
       "Please be quiet.  I've been trying to sleep."
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