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#Post#: 28--------------------------------------------------
Handling bitterness in a relationship.
By: lolafoundation Date: July 8, 2016, 2:59 pm
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Handling bitterness in a relationship.
“Hello Coach Lola, I read some of your relationships articles
here on Facebook and I thought I should ask you this question:
How can I handle a bitter experience in my relationship? Thanks.
My name is Mercy.”
Thank you Mercy, I am happy to hear that you are blessed by this
blog and for this question you’ve asked, I appreciate your quest
for knowledge, just as it is evident in every sphere of life –
Knowledge is the solution to all ills. Firstly, I really don’t
understand the nature of your experiences, but as you said, it
is a bitter one; I know what a bitter experience looks like and
how terrible it is, for the heart and the mind.
We all feel happiness when a beautiful thing comes our way: like
when we fall in love. My mother always recants the euphoria, joy
and ecstasy that surrounded her life, the very moment she
(first) fall in love with her man.
When you want a soul mate and God gives you one, you become
joyful; but how do you feel when you have a different story. A
bitter one NOW…
If your past relationship experience was very sad and
traumatic?. You don’t have to base your self-worth on that bad
experiences or it will redefine your perspective about
relationship.
You have to take responsibility for the mistakes you made during
your previous relationships, your mistakes could be thinking
that you were in love but rather it was lust, if you had been
abused, you may start to feel like a victim.
PLEASE
irrespective of what happened, to say the truth, a bitter
experiences has the tendency of inflicting pains to the heart,
but you don’t have to allow it to weigh you down, you should
refuse the shame, refuse to live a life of reproach, don’t use
the bitter experiences as an excuse to venture into promiscuity,
don’t cover yourself with a sackcloth of hatred.
I have heard people say there is nothing called love, because
somehow they found themselves in a messy relationship, don’t
make a resolution in your heart not to love but instead decide
to love again and again and again.
Don’t say because one relationship brought bad experiences to
you, so you won’t go into another, you are free to do that now.
But remember once you take the vows, it is for better for worst.
The only condition I won’t support “for better, for worse” is
when you realize your partner assaults you physically. In that
scenario, you have to run and prayerfully intercede for his/her
deliverance and is not a period to start jumping from one
man/woman to another, otherwise you will have a compound
problem.
Glorify God in the fire, even in that relationship, control your
anger; don’t make rash decision, which could jeopardized your
relationship. In that state of bitterness, you should forgive.
In happy time choose love, in bad time choose love, and always
choose love. You have every right to be happy and fall in Love.
And most importantly you have to exercise Patience, There is a
maxim that says “patience is bitter but it fruit is sweet”.
#CoachLola Agbajelola Read More www.lolafoundation.com.ng
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