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       #Post#: 83--------------------------------------------------
       Light at the Top of the Hole
   DIR By: StoryGod
       Date: December 28, 2019, 9:29 pm
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       Miella sat on her bed, laptop open and the suite silent. There
       were still plenty of openings for off campus activities a week
       from next Sunday. She could schedule two such activities during
       a semester. Without even thinking she knew what she wanted.
       Franxie was in Simeon in Chains and while the show was not
       recommended for young children, a gaggle of middle schoolers
       were not young. Tickets were twenty-five dollars and Miella
       reserved a dozen spots. The school would order the tickets.
       Miella recommended an early brunch. There would be no need to
       buy lunch. Mega-Metro cards would take care of the
       transportation. That ensured that the activity would fill,
       except it was an off-off Broadway play nobody had heard of. It
       was not a musical. Miella knew the rest. She also knew real
       acting took place in creative spaces, and to see Franxie as a
       paying audience member would feel weird. It would confirm she
       was outside her old world looking in. Why did that make her so
       sad!
       She made herself think of the boot with the broken heel, making
       her limp through the gray mixture that passed for three day old
       snow. She'd limped all the way to her day job, serving interns
       stitched into no-brand hipster wear or business casual like so
       many sausages manufactured in the sky scrapers above. Five hours
       here, twelve there if she was lucky, sitting in the crowded
       apartment in Queens memorizing lines for a monologue for a
       tryout.There had been three tryouts that winter, and except for
       the Pepsi commercial there were no gigs.  She borrowed money
       from everyone when her hours got cut.
       She remembered the job interview at Kotiah-Yovanovitch. She
       remembered making it to the immunization and police background
       check. She'd gotten her shots at the New York Department of
       Health. The background check came out clean. Then a week later,
       a bit part for a lady on a trapeze came through. There were
       parties. Miella made a quick trip back to Westchester to pee in
       a cup. That was humiliating, but she stayed away from everything
       at the parties. The show closed in June. Miella started temping.
       She paid back the money and got one part in the chorus over the
       summer for a show that ran for three openings. She was glad when
       she could move to Greenburgh in August. She imagined just lying
       in bed, but she had a suite to get ready, training in health,
       safety, security, using the app, answering awkward questions.
       She hadn't missed the theater when it went away. That was what
       it felt like. It just "went away." It was gone now. Somehow that
       was harder. It was fun teaching improv. She'd do it multiple
       times. Maybe she'd acquire a good reputation and followers.
       Maybe she could teach kids about real acting and theater. "My
       muse is not dead," Miella told herself. "He just left me too
       poor and tired." "And if my muse really is gone..."
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