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#Post#: 273--------------------------------------------------
To my Ffamily
By: firestar Date: March 12, 2014, 11:57 am
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(tears fill my eyes as i write this) The best words on the
planet cannot even begin to describe how i am feeling right now,
though i can't believe it still, and all i am thinking is of the
details and shit i gotta do. i did not expect it, when i was
telling Daddy that night what had happened. i didn't really
wanna say, as i knew He had enough on His plate already. i was
laying on my back and knees bent today, and lifted my right leg
in the air, then i saw it, my entire right knee, bruised.Then
looked at my left leg, my arm, and hip where i felt the pain
too. i had only thought there some pain on my right forearm, but
only when i touched it. i took a shower, and was sitting on the
bed drying off...i just sat there. Thoughts went back to that
night, knowing i will never forget, especially while the
bruising is still there. Wondering, is it finally over, really
over? Of course moving to a brand new state that i have never
been to, can i really do it, yet i have to do it. i am excited
for a new life, yet scared shitless beyond words. i am afraid i
am gonna screw something up, or forget something somewhere. i
rub my right forearm to remind me ..i have to do it. i know he
will know somethings up before i leave, maybe i will get lucky
and he won't ask any questions. He may already know, i dunno, he
hasn't asked anything. When i was upstairs i thought about i so
wanted to pay him back for it all, at times he would tell me he
wanted me to...but i never did --i took whatever it was, and
tried to get him to let go any way i could. i thought if i did
fight back it would be that much worse, cause he wouldn't take
that either. Then well, i could be dead. My parents know nothing
of this, they would just think i was stupid, and if, and that is
a huge if, i went back to live with them, no more pally, or
taking to any of you. So i guess i am starting over, hoping i
won't screw it up somewhere. i am not looking forward to flying
as it sounded like a pain in the ass with security, but maybe it
won't be so bad. Well, if Yyou're reading this thank Yyou.
Comment if Yyou would like, or not.
#Post#: 275--------------------------------------------------
Re: To my Ffamily
By: nyssa Date: March 12, 2014, 12:30 pm
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firebaby...
i was there once...i have the scars both physically and
emotionally to prove it...but (huge smile) there's this thing
that nys went thru when it was over..really finally over...and i
hope that you will experience it too....it was like a euphoria
...a brand new life...no abuse...no heartache ...just a fresh
clean start...
when my new life started...i wanted a brand new everything ...i
got a new car...a new job....a new house...and i promised my
girls something ..that this would be a house of love...and
safety... that NOBODY would hurt us here...ever.
it makes my heart swell with happiness to be able to extend that
to you now...it's not fancy...it's not spotless...and it's
definately not the Plaza Hotel...but it's warm and safe and full
of love....welcome home
much love,
nys
#Post#: 278--------------------------------------------------
Re: To my Ffamily
By: firestar Date: March 12, 2014, 12:40 pm
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eyes fill and overflow with tears as i read that nyssaa.... i do
hope i feel that euphoria too. Fancy and all that shit i care
not, lived on streets before, and you are extended out the help
for my new life.. i am sure i have lived in worse places..lmao.
i know you have been there, we have talked about it. So many
thanks again, well i can never thank you enough or Daddy or Kay
, well anyone really.
swallows hard with a lump in my throat, tearfully, signed..fire.
#Post#: 289--------------------------------------------------
Re: To my Ffamily
By: {kaylinn}»D§»«K†§» Date: March 13, 2014, 8:51 pm
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If anyone ever thought that W/we just "toss around" the word
"Family," they need only read this thread to understand.
I'm so thankful for all of Y/you.
#Post#: 291--------------------------------------------------
Re: To my Ffamily
By: firestar Date: March 13, 2014, 9:03 pm
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Thank You Head Mistress! Right back at You!
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