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#Post#: 930--------------------------------------------------
A Farewell Letter, From Soviet
By: MrSovietOnion Date: November 24, 2013, 4:47 pm
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Well, this is long overdue. I figured that I sort of owed you
all an explanation for my prolonged absence, and since I'm on my
way out the door I might as well post my story here, do with it
what you will.
So as most of you probably know, I suffer from serious
depressive and anxiety issues. Though I suspect I've been
suffering from these my entire life, only within the past year
have they really reached their peak. Basically, I got really
attached to a certain individual and they ultimately let me down
and that pretty much started a long road of butchered emotions
that I don't wanna get into right meow. My life sucked
throughout the duration of the summer, and due to a series of
crappy events, I almost offed myself like twice. Well, after
that, my life got weird, then it got bad, and now it's...
moderately better. I found out that I actually had some
psychotic issues (no, I'm not a bloody murderer) that made my
moods change randomly, made me get really paranoid at random
times, etc. etc. This, naturally, caused me to get even more
depressed. However, I got treatment for all of these issues and
my life got a LOT better. High school's alright, I've got great
friends, and hell, I might actually be in love.
Am I happy? Honestly? No. Not really. I experience happiness
because of what I just mentioned but really, I feel more dead on
the inside than a zombie with a shotgun blast through his chest.
I keep myself busy, and I can manage through the days, but
something still feels off. I don't know quite what I'm looking
for in life right now, but I'm sure when I find it, things'll
get better for me. We'll see.
You might be wondering what I've been doing while not playing
KoGaMa. Probably not, but that's cool too. I've essentially just
stopped giving a damn about most things. I lost interest in
building in KoGaMa (insert more-than-well-deserved insult to the
game's developers here) and started playing other games that
have peaked my interest. At some point, maybe I'll come back
here and give you a "Soviet's Top 25 Video Games" list for the
hell of it. Anyway, I've been playing Oblivion (the game of my
childhood, best friggin game ever) and Fallout: New Vegas, as
well as the Bioshock series and some indie games that are kinda
fun. I still make electronic music quite a lot. So, those are my
days in a nutshell.
To any of my fans of KoGaMa, thank you for ALL the support.
You're all most dope. Unfortunately, I think I'm pretty much
done with that game for now, as well as my youtube channel, but
we'll see. And to the developers, thank you, too. For though it
seems that you're completely coasting in developing this game
and have completely abandoned the US server to cater to the
Brazilians' needs, for about two years you provided me with a
form of escapism that gave me something to look forward to at
the end of the day, instead of just sitting in my basement
contemplating suicide. KoGaMa was an outlet for all my
depressive issues, and I could just escape to there with the
people I met and enjoy myself. I honestly remember the day I
joined like it was yesterday. The nostalgia is almost tangible.
But, KoGaMa is no longer my top choice for escapism, for as I've
mentioned, I just get lost in Oblivion and Fallout. I think that
everyone who plays video games of any kind and have a serious
love for gaming will agree with me when I say that sometimes,
for just a bit, the universe created in a game is better than
the one we live in; perhaps that's why we spend so much time
playing.
So, farewell, KoGaMa. I'm off to try to make something decent of
myself. And, who knows, maybe you'll see me around from time to
time in-game. Just don't expect much from me anymore. And now,
to my fellow masterleaders of the ever-so-old EBC, I have a few
words for each of you. Noble, through all the time I spent with
you over skype, facebook, and KoGaMa, you quickly became one of
my best friends. You definitely helped my survive my depression,
and you've always been there when I needed you. Cubik, you
baby-eating son of a gun, you're just fantastic. We've had way
too much fun just screwing around in-game. It's been fun. Exel,
you're my #1 Bioshock fangirl buddy. We gotta stay in touch (all
of you, too) because we've had wayyyy awesome conversations.
Lastly, Johnny Kaykay, who I don't think is a masterleader but
whatever, you've been there for me too, and quite a lot. We've
had so much fun building and so many good times just doing
whatever, we are DEFINITELY keeping in touch, as well as the
rest of yas. And, as for Tekin, TFG, iKGM, and that one guy I'm
forgetting but I'm fairly certain was important, you're all
fantastic too. OH PENGUIN, that's who. You're all just wonderful
people. Keep in touch, you know where to find me.
Goodbye.
#Post#: 931--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Farewell Letter, From Soviet
By: DevinEngland Date: November 24, 2013, 9:12 pm
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You... You haven't talked with me in almost three months, you
waned contact with me for so long, you and I talked the whole
summer, and most of the time I even played that game that we've
both quit, and yet... You forget me in your goodbye post?
I left the game because the developers are shit and the game
isn't really meant for people with our level of creativity. But
that's not the point. I considered you a friend, kept you as a
favorite contact on my Skype, would go online to check Facebook
to see if you or any of the other people I'd ever talk to on
there were ever online.
I narrowed my Facebook down to 26 goddamned friends, out of over
200, which used to be over 400, and you stayed on there, but you
were never online. I waited for you to ever respond to any of my
random hello messages anywhere that I still used, but you forgot
me.
I... Just...
Fuck man.
#Post#: 932--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Farewell Letter, From Soviet
By: MrSovietOnion Date: November 25, 2013, 7:47 pm
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Hey, none of that. You're more of a legit friend than a KoGaMa
friend. We just happened to troll around on KoGaMa. Neither one
of us played that game anymore, why would I say goodbye to you?
#Post#: 933--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Farewell Letter, From Soviet
By: MrSovietOnion Date: November 25, 2013, 7:50 pm
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You're actually probably my best friend that I just happened to
meet on that site. And the facebook messages - I think you might
have actually added me on my old account? Now that I think of it
I don't recall seeing you on my friends list, I'll double check
and if you're not there I'll add you. Sorry bout that.
#Post#: 934--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Farewell Letter, From Soviet
By: TekInFR33 Date: November 25, 2013, 8:28 pm
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The best thing: you're not dead! Great to know that you're still
online, maybe if you can I'll chat with you to suggest a few
games, *cough* BORDERLANDS 2 *cough*
#Post#: 936--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Farewell Letter, From Soviet
By: RodneyFesslerJr Date: November 28, 2013, 9:11 pm
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I'll miss ya, Soviet. You where a cool guy. Im kinda on, and
off, with KoGaMa, and i dont know what to do. But anyways, cya.
It was nice knowing you.
#Post#: 938--------------------------------------------------
Re: A Farewell Letter, From Soviet
By: Daniel288link Date: December 25, 2013, 6:28 pm
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You may have forgotten about me. Although we did have some good
times together. But not too many because of my spam craziness
over the summer. I just. I just have no clue why I made that
mistake. I know I won't be spamming again anyways. It was a big
mistake. A really big one.
Also, I know I am replying to this pretty late, since I just
never bothered with this forum for a while. I forgot ALL about
this forum in September. In September, I stopped all of my
nonsense. So, I come back to this forum today, to use it, to
talk, and etc.
But all I could say is that you were a pretty good friend, I was
a little bit a fan of you, we sure did have some good times
together, so I hope you have a good time in the outside world of
KoGaMa.
Also, I see that you have been back about once or twice a week.
Good to know that KoGaMa gets rid of your depression and stuff.
:)
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