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#Post#: 3139--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: October 22, 2014, 12:33 am
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Dear PM:
New rule, 250 words or less. Preferably less.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 3151--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: guest89
Date: October 22, 2014, 8:01 am
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...so, encouraged to edit before posting? Check.
#Post#: 3221--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: guest89
Date: October 23, 2014, 8:11 pm
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I’m not looking for bliss. Billions would slit their mother’s
throat for my troubles. But I’m not trying to hang onto it
either, it’s just what’s playing right now. So if the path must
take me over the edge, so be it. Show me edge.
I’ve been trying to really witness what’s going on here, to get
past the postcards, to enquire more deeply than the stock press
releases. And things are turning up.
The pleasures are paling. Sex is no longer sexy. Sensations are
dull and heavy and the sensibilities just seem like more
maintenance, like the house. My family are other, albeit more or
less pleasant people, towards whom obligation hangs like a
weight around my neck. My affection for them is a thing, that
sits next to me like a suitcase on a train platform. I enjoy
food, but much more the meditative quality of the creating than
the eating, which seems base and mechanical.
Conversation that isn’t …this… is just white noise. And nobody
actually talks about any of …this. It’s crazy talk.
Life is a dream. That resonates so strongly that it must be
right. I just don’t know it’s right.
A dream has a definite value: null. Within it there is no
thought of dream, it’s only when the dreamer strays too close to
the edge that it begins to dawn. It’s also only those first few
moments of wakefulness that the desire to remain in the dream
has any real pull…
I feel like I’m not resolving things well enough, visually…like
reality is 20-megapixels and my eyes are only 2-megapixels…and
if I can only… squint.the.right.way...
#Post#: 3231--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: October 24, 2014, 12:13 am
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Maybe pin-hole glasses are called for.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 3389--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: guest89
Date: October 26, 2014, 9:18 pm
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The insanity is so near the surface at times as to frighten by
proximity. Such a thin veneer! Like turning suddenly in a dark
alley to find the unblinking eyes and whitened face of my killer
staring at me, inches from my nose.
“Patience” you wrote.
Click.
Slow down. Stop. Watch. Wait.
Sustained witnessing is beginning to bear fruit, albeit in a
sometimes alarming, tectonic way. What am I? Do not adjust your
sets. The audiomancy works like a smart bomb. The path emerges.
The focused inward attention on …what seems a process of
characterisation reveals unwritable things that come and go
before words could approximate them. The gaps and cracks are
beginning to show. I note strong, though darkly cloaked
cross-currents at play within this very personality. More a
sense of peripheral movement. Things that seem to originate
within, yet alien when apprehended. I am as yet unable to track
all but the slowest moving. Too many escape too often, hence the
need for this to be sustained, focused. I must shine a light on
each, follow it home and kill it. The Jed Method.
Something massive and dark is the backdrop. Phaedrus was a
genius and he went nutso, yet I still believe it’s an option,
that I’ll be able to manage, or even just stop it if it gets too
much...nervous to think that the so-called ‘management' is very
likely hopeful fingers in a dissolving dyke.
Doublethink, lots.
Further!
#Post#: 3398--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: October 26, 2014, 11:05 pm
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Dear B:
You are a cunning linguist and I enjoy your semantically
ambiguous and technically complex meandering.
Keep on keeping on. Never lose site of the directives, breath,
watch, be gentle and don't try to change anything. Change will
come of it's own when needed. The only pain you will experience
will be your clinging to old baggage. Fly light (lite), or fly
naked.
New idea, not Virgin Airlines, Naked Airlines. Not need for
security checks. I like that idea.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 3926--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: guest89
Date: November 2, 2014, 5:01 am
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i've taken to the technique you suggested, Jed: being quiet and
expanding and contracting with what appears in the web of the
senses and the awareness beyond them...made a bit of a practice
of it for the time being, while it's useful...i keep rushing to
conclusions and wanting to write my observations down, but then
something quieter bids me wait a bit longer...
#Post#: 3928--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: November 2, 2014, 6:22 am
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:D
#Post#: 3966--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: guest89
Date: November 2, 2014, 5:10 pm
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I drove for an hour and a half into nowhere yesterday, to wait
at the drop zone outside of York for the sacred sock to fall. I
wanted my first jump to see out the old year, so booked it in
over a month ago. The voucher had been pinned to my notice board
for almost a year, since the kids gave it to me. Not something
that had ever been on my bucket list, but I wasn’t averse to the
the notion of stepping off into air from a perfectly good plane.
Damned if it didn’t coincide with the West Coast Sundowner and
some Guinness record attempt…the 80 or so other jumpers all
lolled around very patiently on beanbags or stretched on the
floor of the hangar, enjoying the social aspects or nursing
hangovers (I gathered, from the sunglasses many wore, even
inside). “Waiting is what we do,” I was matter-of-factly
informed during conversation with bright a little kiwi, who was
there for the attempt but experienced enough to bring her
laptop, so she could work while waiting and "pay for her habit”.
So I had time to really focus on the decision to throw
everything untrue out of a high altitude moving vehicle: all
that is false and breakable, including the locus of awareness
that thought it had decided and would enjoy and be terrified and
exhilarated by the experience.
Makyo.
#Post#: 3974--------------------------------------------------
Re: biisuto
DIR By: guest89
Date: November 2, 2014, 7:56 pm
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Thanks for the recommend (from your books), started reading Moby
Dick. The humour is most salient so far. I’m just to where the
Pequod has dropped her pilots and pushed out to sea. Ahab is
about to make an appearance, I’m guessing. I went into it with
all your notes in mind, so am reading a whole lot into
Melville’s words. A rollicking good read, indeed.
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