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#Post#: 18586--------------------------------------------------
Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I don't
know
DIR By: Cognizer
Date: March 2, 2016, 8:57 am
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Hello, Jed:
Thanks so much for having this forum, and for sending whatever
help comes my way. Love you’re writing, your voice, your way of
positing the truth.
Here’s where I’m at: Two years ago you I was an
atheist/materialist. I thought all talk of God, enlightenment
were beyond what humans could know (and maybe they are!). Then a
philosophical friend who I deeply trust told me of his nirvanic
experience. This included the knowledge that we don’t die, that
all is one, that there is no self. This sent me headlong into
seeking. Much reading, some meditating.
I get frustrated when people say “stop seeking” because I was
already not seeking two years ago. This more or less includes
non-spiritual seeking---I’m not a sufferer, I already thought
life meaningless, free will nonsense, morals arbitrary. “It’s
just this” troubles me because my “it’s just this” does not
include an understanding that we are all of the same
consciousness, which seems to me a hallmark of all TRed
“individuals.”
I will be obedient, and am ready for some serious SA . . . but
when I sit down to try it on my own I feel like I already know
nothing. Truly I don’t know if my “real position” is one of
skepticism, or if I “believe” in non-duality, or even that no
self can be realized. If all life is indistinguishable form a
dream, how could I possibly know anything? So how to start?
Thanks again!
--Cognizer
#Post#: 18610--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: March 3, 2016, 12:27 am
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You are expecting T/R to be something, something you think it
should be. That's and effective block to realization.
You cannot imagine it, because it's not an it.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 18616--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Cognizer
Date: March 3, 2016, 9:42 am
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Me again, that "YOU" you were most certainly refereing to in
your most recent rant.
It's true, I expect something. I don't know what it will feel
like, or seem like, or think like. But I assume it will be
something. It would be great if you could suggest how I might
give up on expectation.
An understanding that all is one, that we are all the same
conciousness (if an ordinary consciousness)---seems to be an
outcome of T/R, if only a "booby prize" (that's the story I keep
getting told). Is this expectation also a block? How to rid
myself of this since it is the chief motor of my truth devotion?
Perhaps worth noting here that I've been through the "process"
at Liberation Unleashed. In the end, I felt frustrated, with my
guide practically screaming at me "How hard is it to see there
is no self." Even though I was assured that the no-self they
were pointing to was not an "intellectual understanding" it
always seemed that that was how I as supposed to accept it.
#Post#: 18618--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: March 3, 2016, 9:44 am
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Seems to be the way they operate.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 18645--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Cognizer
Date: March 4, 2016, 10:29 am
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Ok, so . . . going through life, accepting most things, my
burning questions burn less (even if unanswered). What next?
#Post#: 18646--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: March 4, 2016, 10:36 am
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What's next? What is in front of you right now... yeh, I know
you computer. As un-romantic as that may seem, that is what is
next. Can you just allow it to be, whatever it might be... just
let it be. You might say let beingness be, as it is.
Nothing more is required, but you paste story upon story over
it. Just stop pasting.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 18648--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Cognizer
Date: March 4, 2016, 10:59 am
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One question about ignoring the pasting: There are stories that
come to mind as thoughts in language. These are easily ignored
(well, mostly), or at least it's easy to imagine ignoring them.
But all the subconscious programming that separates a computer
and anything else even before a word comes to mind . . . how can
we possibly not paste that on the raw experience?
#Post#: 18652--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: March 4, 2016, 11:48 am
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You are complicating what need not be, and isn't, complicated at
all. Get out of your head and into your experience.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 18736--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Cognizer
Date: March 7, 2016, 1:22 pm
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Ignoring the humor in your recent 10 step program, I'd say I'm
1.5.
What always ends up causing dissonace is the trippiness of
stages 3 through 8. How can the mind not yearn to undesrtand
such things---and get ever more in the way? And how can
something as drastic as "there is no universe" not crash against
the endless advice that I'm just missing the obvious?
#Post#: 18751--------------------------------------------------
Re: Don't know how to fully know I don't know, even though I
don't know
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: March 7, 2016, 10:33 pm
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I have to hallucinate a bit to much in order to pretend I
understand you.
Please explain further with as many specifics as possible.
Love ya, Jed
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