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#Post#: 181--------------------------------------------------
Zade
DIR By: Plugturtle
Date: August 30, 2014, 2:14 pm
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Just finished writing my paragraphs here and for some reason my
computer decided to blow it away.
Anyways, here i go again.
Im 17, currently doing my last year of school. Dont really know
where im going in life whatsoever.
Since a young age ive been intrigued by awareness, about 2 years
ago i came across the famouse Eckhart Tolle. I thought he was
genius until i realized hes full of ****, sure his writings
sound lovely and nice but they're just writings by some old
bogey who thinks hes a modern jesus. Sorry about that. After
Tolle i came across a cheap guide to buddhism (interesting
religion yet still just a religion, no in depth analysis of
anything) after that i came across Stephen Norquist who is a
pretty cool guy and then of course i found Jeds trilogy (good
stuff)
To the point, I dont know exactly what im looking for but im
looking for it anyways, some sort of stable ground to standon
would be nice but whatever comes, comes.
Dont really know what else to say...
Thanks for reading!
#Post#: 182--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Plugturtle
Date: August 30, 2014, 2:17 pm
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I have a pretty good grasp on jeds books and gorans book
refuting the external world.
#Post#: 383--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Plugturtle
Date: September 2, 2014, 11:41 am
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I dont want to say I had a vision of enlightenment as ive
convinced myself several times of that but I defenitly stumbled
upon something new. I was reading Gorans book just the other day
after not taking interest in the spiritual thing for a good few
months, and I was starting to really just do it and put my
current experience into overdrive and i could see everything
clearly, awareness. Just the exact same experience but i could
see through my thoughts in a way. They were still present, very
few but still there. I know that something fishy is going on.
Ive been trying to enter the same state again but i fet caught
up in the mind and cant see past things although i have been
questioning what is happening quite a bit the oast few days, not
in a quest to TR path sort of way but in a genuine sort of fire.
Just going to use this to write down thoughts.
#Post#: 441--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: September 3, 2014, 8:02 am
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Hi Zade: Write away. Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 638--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Plugturtle
Date: September 5, 2014, 5:00 pm
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Over the past few days ive been detaching from several things
through the day, just picking them apart and seeing the true
form of experience.
Ive gone into a sort of unity conciousness for a few moments a
few times over the past week. Its where i can sort of glimpse
into reality and see whats happening at that moment for what it
actually is but than imget distracted and thoughts are being
followed and it feels impossible to op followijg the thoughts
because than more thoughts come and more and im in a total state
of confusion.
#Post#: 649--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: September 5, 2014, 11:45 pm
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I understand you are confuse Zade and confusion always precedes
learning something new. Just stay with it.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 765--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Plugturtle
Date: September 7, 2014, 2:48 pm
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Actually i take back saying Eckhart Tolle is full of shit,
watched a bit of him there on youtube and he has some legit
stuff to say
#Post#: 843--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Plugturtle
Date: September 8, 2014, 12:51 pm
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Its been about a week of this breaking down of beliefs and im
getting a bit nauseous cause i dont feel ready to completely go
for the dive, it looks pretty daunting like its pretty much not
having attachment and im lretty attached to attachment. I keep
finding myself backing up fairly frequently throughout the day
where i can see the happenings without interpretation, fluid
manifestation is a nice word to reference it as.
#Post#: 1044--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Plugturtle
Date: September 12, 2014, 7:11 pm
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Finding it easier now to switch to observer view where i can
experience without judgement or analysis of whats happening but
it seems so boring sometimes compared to knowledge based
enviroment.i feel like theres still a very large portion of
identification to be broken down and seperation to be seen
through but it looks like a mountain to go through.
#Post#: 1805--------------------------------------------------
Re: Zade
DIR By: Plugturtle
Date: September 27, 2014, 6:27 pm
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Kept pushing off ipdating here, throughout the day without even
noticing it happening ive been dissecting my beliefs. Ive been a
bit discouraged of it though at times. Genuinely looks scary to
not be here.
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