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#Post#: 102--------------------------------------------------
Tono
DIR By: Tono
Date: August 28, 2014, 11:53 am
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Jed,
Let me explain briefly where I think I am
I'm at this point where I understand that there is nothing
out-there and we are living a illusion, a dream, or a movie.
To be more precise, from this point of view, everything is more
like a movie than a dream or an illusion. Everything is being
played, and I'm like a camera. I know I do not exist as a body,
so I understand that my memories and thoughts are part of this
movie that is being played, while emotions (positive and
negative) seems to be something different, as my reactions to
the movie, the "energy" that makes the movie more real (or make
us being attached to the movie - what is a live -movie- without
emotion?)
But at the same time, I'm just fully inmersed in the movie, as
it is so real, and so attaching that my living reality is the
movie itself
I'm strrugling with what I am. So far, what i know is that I am
this awareness that is perceiving the movie that is being
played. But I feel this is not the ultimate truth. So I need to
go further (to use your words)
I've read some books where the conclusion is that the perceived
and the perceiver is the same, as if there is only perceiving,
or like there is no-self. But I'm really stuck at this point, as
I can't grasp it, or understand it. It's very difficult to go
further from here
Deep down, I can feel that my intentions shape the world around
me, and thus I should be interconnected with the movie itself.
But this do not make myself the same as the movie. I'm still an
indiviudal perceiving entity that even without body, outside
objetcs, etc, is perceiving some "appearences"
I tend to think that what I am (awareness) is everything that it
is. There are no objects out there, so no others too. But still,
other people seem so real that is very hard to negate its
existence, and it makes me wonder if I'm the only awareness ,
and/or if other people are just other awareness, ...Is this
another attachment? We don't want to be alone...
I really want to understand, and to know what is truth, what I
am. What's the point if it's not this one?
I feel that maybe what I need is some time to process all this
before going further. But I don't want, I want it now
So you know. Any help is greatly appreciated.
#Post#: 119--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: August 29, 2014, 1:39 am
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Dear Tono:
Thank you for sharing. Now down to work, I am not good on
generalities so I need a simple specific question from you. This
will also help focus you. Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 138--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Tono
Date: August 29, 2014, 9:25 am
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Jed,
Some background: I was educated as a catholic when I was young
I read (in order)
- Butterflies are free to fly, by Stephen Davis. (it mentions
you, so that's why i got to know your books), a couple of times
- Your 4 books
- Enlightment: Behind the Scenes, by Marc Leavitt
- The Nature of Personal Reality (Jane Roberts / Seth material)
- I started Course in Miracles, but couldn't find it
interesting
- Wu Wei Wu: Open Secret
- Busting loose from the money game: Robert Scheninfeld, but i
couldn't find anything much interesting here
- Goran: Refuting the external World
Some scientific:
- The holographic universe: Michael Talbot
- Taking the quantum leap: By Fred Alan Wolf
I'm just struggling with the concept of
perceiver-perceived-perceiving. It seems that there is only
perceiving. That's all there is. Then there is no me, no
objects, just this perceiving. It seems like I’m a process. But
how I process could be aware of itself. It does not seem
logical. I'm trapped here. What can I do?
#Post#: 140--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: August 29, 2014, 9:30 am
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You have a big mind, and that's a big problem. Don't look for
logic. Embrace the two side of everything and everyone. Nothing
is ever black and white, period. You mind wants them to be and
then it gets to be right and judge one properly black and one
properly white. Horseshit, it's not that way and logic it won't
take you where you are seeking to go. Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 149--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Tono
Date: August 29, 2014, 10:36 am
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Thanks Jed
A big mind is another belief. Another lie. Another role in this
dreamlike universe.
I'll try to think what you mean by "Embrace the two side of
everything and everyone" and I'll come back to you
As you know, every bit of help is welcomed
Thanks again
#Post#: 157--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: August 29, 2014, 10:28 pm
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Further Tono, Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 305--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Tono
Date: September 1, 2014, 11:17 am
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Embrace the two sides of everything and everybody
You are right. There is no difference between subject and
object. It is the same thing. This is what I truly need to
realize
#Post#: 306--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Jed McKenna
Date: September 1, 2014, 11:18 am
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You're on to it, now wrestle it to the ground. Good work. Love
ya, Jed.
#Post#: 892--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Tono
Date: September 9, 2014, 1:07 pm
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Hello Jed
An update
I can feel that there are two elements:
-Consciousness. I can feel that this consciousness is empty,
devoid of thought, devoid of anything. It is pure awareness
-Perceiving. I could say that this is the dream, that this is
the “appearance process” within consciousness.
Then, Consciousness is the dreamer. Perceiving is the dream.
They are indivisible as there can’t be a dream without a
dreamer, and a dreamer without a dream. But still Consciousness
and Perceving are not the same thing to me
I’m not sure if I’m in the right track, just to double check
with you
And another question: What I wrote before is part of a rational
process, but not a living one. Should I focus on feeling it?
#Post#: 927--------------------------------------------------
Re: Tono
DIR By: Tono
Date: September 10, 2014, 2:33 am
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Jed,
I feel there is a strong fear inside me to accept / embrace
Consciousness. It is like if I could loose the dream state and
not being able to come back again. What is consciousness without
the dream state? Could be total loneliness? It is a feeling that
runs deep inside me. Lot of fear I guess
But, we are already alone. We shouldn’t fear it, isn’t it?
The attachment to the dream state is enormous. The feeling of
self and existance of others is comforting.
Even if I logically understand that this is a dream, going
further seems quite difficult.
You said it. Fear of loneliness. Fear of nothing. Fear of
no-self.
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