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#Post#: 154--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: mariam Date: August 29, 2014, 7:11 pm
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what lets go? what holds on to anything?
#Post#: 160--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: Jed McKenna Date: August 29, 2014, 10:47 pm
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Ramana explained it this way. You use a thorn (a created
identity) to remove a thorn (your currently existing identity).
Once removed, you throw both thorns away. Makes good sense to
me, how about you? Yes, in the end you can throw everything
away. Up to you.... Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 179--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: mariam Date: August 30, 2014, 10:11 am
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yes, perfect sense, thank you.
interesting too, to observe that the statement above was my 9th
thought.
my 1st was: 'yes, it makes sense and seems to accurately
describe what i'm doing'.
2nd: 'but i wonder what the experience is for one who has thrown
all identities away?'
3rd: 'is it really possible to remain manifested in a body
without an identity?'
4th: 'maybe throwing away the identities simply means ridding
oneself of the attachment to the identities'
5th: 'i should probably read ramana'
6th: 'i'm over-thinking'
7th: 'deep breaths'
8th: 'now here'
#Post#: 180--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: mariam Date: August 30, 2014, 10:21 am
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12th thought: ''now here' is a created thorn as well, used to
remove the attention from the briar patch of overthinking.'
#Post#: 196--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: Jed McKenna Date: August 31, 2014, 1:28 am
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Excellent!
#Post#: 289--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: mariam Date: September 1, 2014, 10:15 am
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would you call gratitude an emotion?
#Post#: 297--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: Jed McKenna Date: September 1, 2014, 10:34 am
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Dear Mariam:
I have no idea what your experience of 'gratitude' is, but you
can try to tell me. I'm not under any illusion that we are
communicating, but we can pretend and have fun. What do you feel
in your body when you experience gratitude? What conversation
takes place in your mind when you experience gratitude. How do
you hold your body and head? Where specifically does your
breathing take place in your body? Are you alone, naked, clothed
or otherwise? This is for you of course, not me. Have a look-see
and share if you wish. Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 471--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: mariam Date: September 3, 2014, 12:56 pm
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i took ample time to cover the breadth of your question(s).
these are the things i noticed and can remember.
i have assumed myself to be grateful most of the time, but i
noticed that this is not the case. once i started watching for
gratitude to arise, i saw that i'm not grateful much of the
time, nor am i anything else really, just blank capacity.
i noticed 'gratitude' arising as i washed the dishes. in the
body it felt like less tension in the jaw and shoulders.
breathing centered more in the chest, and not in awareness until
i checked in. clothed and alone. it came up as 'i'm grateful for
clean running water coming from a tap in the kitchen' but then i
wondered, 'is this more like a subtle affirmation of belief in
illusion?'
then later, alone, standing at the couch folding laundry, taking
intentional belly breaths, head and neck straight, but curved
slightly forward as i focused on my work. a cool breeze from the
window brushed my cheek and neck, passing through the fibers of
my thin sweater, up my arm and across my back and chest. there
was a heightening, and the absence of conversation. afterward i
called it gratitude.
another experience, alone, sitting, wrapped in a towel on the
bathtub ledge. less like a heightening, more like an all-over
throbbing warmth, circulating, pushing, escaping through the
skin. not shallow breath, somewhere in the middle, growing
deeper. sitting straight, feet on the floor, hands in lap, head
and neck strong and even. no conversation, then a brief
imagining of oxygen molecules, thick in the blood, exchanging
across cells. return to no conversation. then a few minutes
resting my head and right shoulder against the wall, belly
breathing and integrating.
is this similar to your experience(s) of gratitude? and would
you call it an emotion?
#Post#: 490--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: Jed McKenna Date: September 4, 2014, 12:52 am
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I experience it in a more generalized warm fuzzy way. However,
the point of this little conversation is not actually gratitude,
but how different my meanings and your meaning aren't the same
and it applies to all our pretended communications. Whether or
not gratitude is an emotion is of little value, but letting it
go is perhaps useful. I suggest not dwelling on it, but looking
towards what it is appearing in. And, what is it appearing in.
Love ya, Jed.
#Post#: 530--------------------------------------------------
Re: mariam
By: mariam Date: September 4, 2014, 10:40 am
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yeah, i can see the desire to validate understanding. and i see
the futile impossibility of it.
i agree there may be little value in recognizing whether
gratitude is an emotion or not, but it's that little bit of
perceived value that keeps me digging. if gratitude is an
emotion, then sure, let it slip-slide on by like all the rest.
but if gratitude is more like a form of attention, then maybe i
don't want to cut it loose just yet.
you stated wanting keeps us here. rather than buying the
assertion, i'm going to rent it for awhile, but either way, i'm
paying for it with my attention, and perpetuating by gratuity.
if you have any additional thoughts, for the sake of
conversation, please share. in the meantime, i'll practice
seeing past the gratitude to the
in which it appears.
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