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       #Post#: 39944--------------------------------------------------
       hi there
       By: Royaalss1 Date: January 16, 2020, 7:21 pm
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       hi jed. havent posted here in a while but I've been doing a lot
       of writing/ reflecting on basicly who am I and what is this
       experience? What I have found is that I don't know. I cant say
       for sure who I am beyond a personality that interacts in the
       world with 'others' who seem apparently seperate from 'me'. but
       I'm seeing them though 'my' eyes so there a part of my
       experience and therefore we are connected in some way but how is
       not clear. connected but pretending to be others maybe or
       playing others. These roles appear very serious. thats the basis
       of this whole game. To drop your role is highly discouraged, but
       why is that? We like to use words like 'forever' to describe our
       lives. "together forever" or "this is how it will be forever"
       yeah forever until the end. i'm 30 now were will I be in another
       30 years? in 30 after that? This death is seen as the worse
       thing possible but is that true? am I this person I appear to
       be? or is this just a role ive become somehow convinced of? like
       a character in a dream. dreams appear quite convincing. but who
       is the dreamer? you appear to be an individual (dual) in a dream
       but really your not, your laying in bed dreaming the whole dream
       world up. If thats even true. Things can appear true from our
       perspective but what is our perspective? were does that come
       from? curious.
       Thanks for reading and writing these books to help
       #Post#: 39945--------------------------------------------------
       Re: hi there
       By: Jed McKenna Date: January 17, 2020, 2:52 am
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       Forever is highly over-rated.... well... we could probably say
       that about ''never'' as well. The whole issue or identities is
       most interesting and yes, it goes deep, very deep. Your
       reluctance to release them is a purely habit issue. How could
       they be important as everyone has dozens of them, like 7 billion
       times a dozen. If they were really important and substantial you
       would there there might only be one... and as I write... there
       is only one primary one, that is ''I am human'''. BTW anything
       that starts with ''I am xxx'' is an identity. Even ''I am cold''
       is one.
       Death will be quite wonderful... the most interesting day of you
       experience. How do I know... because everyone believes otherwise
       and that is all the proof one needs... in  a sense. Just like
       your night dreams, you are the dreamer, the dreamt and the dream
       scene. Who did all this? You, of course. There is no one else.
       But you have to comprehend/experience this from a perspective
       that might be called ''a level up'' or something like that.
       (Levels are also dream product).
       In order for the ''bigger'' you to dream effectively, there must
       be a ''ring-pass-not'' which separates you and make this dream
       appear as real as it does.
       Another thought for your consideration. The whole idea of a
       ''point of view'' is another trick to make you think your are
       individual and separate from others. There is no point to view
       from as you are every possible point all at the same time. You
       are the see-er, the seen and the seeing itself.
       Upon reading the above, you might think it a little strange or
       even quite rediculous. You can resolve and grasp it all fairly
       easily by contemplation ''infinity'' and what it really means.
       Best wishes on your journey.
       Love ya, Jed.
       #Post#: 39948--------------------------------------------------
       Re: hi there
       By: Royaalss1 Date: January 17, 2020, 9:44 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Infinity... Identities.. Point of view. 'me' being something
       other than what I appear as. In order for the whole thing to be
       convincing as you said. So than i'm not this individual at all
       but somehow everything I am experiencing. A different type of
       being from a human. Totally different. Something else entirely.
       Something that want's to create the trick of being an individual
       with others bc w/o others there is no individual to have these
       absurd identities which clearly don't make any sense and take a
       great amount of effort and intelligence/tricks to
       maintain(clearly lying to yourself, having a moral code when
       'others'aka part of you is looking etc etc. to infinity I
       suppose)
       Its like a shift in perspective but once you shift it you can
       see it a little bit. well idk. you just gotta ask who am I? what
       am I? and say idk. until the gravity of your role pulls you back
       down and you just carry on. crawl a little further and paste a
       smile on and keep going through the motions. painfully. Its like
       being under a spell that everyone in the world around you is
       under and its like how the hell do you snap out of that? would
       you even want to? be around a bunch of freaks under a spell and
       your the only sain one. Like being the only sober person at a
       party times a million. and thats your life. prob pretty
       entertaining but also prob quite a burden. and you spend all day
       talking to sleep walkers? bet you get a kick out of that. I used
       to dream I was one of them too, I think. I have some memory of
       it anyway, It appears. wtf man. haha. but that's like the deal
       of sorts one makes to have this whole experience. gotta fool
       yourself or it can't happen. that is magical. created all kinds
       of giant cats and lizards and talking monkey's all the dreamer.
       What i'm not sure about and can't comprehend at all is infinity
       and I guess what benefit trying to comprehend can have for 'me'
       ?
       Thank you
       #Post#: 39950--------------------------------------------------
       Re: hi there
       By: Jed McKenna Date: January 18, 2020, 5:00 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Of course you can't comprehend infinity, but it's great fun
       trying and it does tend to get you out of your brain. Brains
       only work on finite subjects. And, don't let your brain tell you
       you can't get out of your brain because your brain doesn't have
       a clue. It's you jailor and unlikely to give you the keys.
       Love ya, Jed.
       #Post#: 39963--------------------------------------------------
       Re: hi there
       By: Royaalss1 Date: January 21, 2020, 4:58 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I read a post about IQ and it's something I've spent time
       thinking about. Apparently based on IQ there are even equations
       that work just as well as predictors of gravity for were you
       will wind up (income, life style etc). I'd say you are quite
       intelligent and therefore an effective communicator. If a
       student has too low of an IQ to think effectively or very slowly
       that person is going to have a difficult life. Probably be low
       income treated poorly in the world etc. So what's the point of
       even trying. Your intelligence is totally out of "your" hands
       and if you can't contribute you don't get anything. And the
       quality of your life will be shit. How does waking up as an
       adult help a fool in a ruthless world. Seems like we're all just
       kind fooked
       #Post#: 39964--------------------------------------------------
       Re: hi there
       By: Jed McKenna Date: January 22, 2020, 12:28 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Buddha is proported to have said many things, and I will
       paraphrase one of them (by the time any saying from over 2,000
       year ago reaches you, rest assured it has been paraphrases
       hundreds of times). ''Enlightenement gave me nothing at all''.
       Well, in my experience it did two things, it gave me this
       universe and took away the veil... but how does that help
       anyone. It doesn't. There is no one to help, and help, while we
       tend to do it in this dream, is just another dream concept and,
       if of any significance at all, very little and temporary, as is
       anything in a dream.
       Love ya, Jed.
       P.S. I suggest that you, on a personal level, be generally
       helpful but only because it tends to make the dream a little
       smoother.
       #Post#: 40118--------------------------------------------------
       Re: hi there
       By: Royaalss1 Date: February 16, 2020, 2:31 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Please write me privately at cambodianashram@gmail.com for a
       little illucidation on that topic.
       Love ya, Jed.
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