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       #Post#: 38513--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Death_by_SallyD Date: June 23, 2019, 7:32 am
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       Wake up from dream in which I’m visiting, with a friend, vast
       desert territories which make up the polar caps.  The southern
       pole is the domain of several coexisting Buddhist clans and the
       “visitor center” for this region is a rich, beautiful garden
       laid out in a way which reflects the curvilinear glyphs and
       chants inherent in these traditions.  We’re on a kind of tour of
       the region, pausing to grab some of the local cuisine laid out
       in a buffet in the middle of the garden from which we are
       spooning portions onto these wooden matrix bowls….almost like
       cork…the shape of large concave leaves.  The tone is
       beauty….wonder….but then eventually marred by my reaction to the
       presence of a teenage bully who had somehow infiltrated the
       scene….and I just couldn’t help but deal with violently.
       Fear associated with bullies are a big part of my
       childhood/teenage history…still with lingering echoes. I wake up
       with feeling of inner turmoil from this and literally
       sit/meditate for hours….intent on simply observing the residue
       of reaction.  It all settles down finally before heading to
       work.  Intent to body-breath (per Jed’s instructions read
       somewhere)….watch today for any remnants via interactions while
       at work today.
       #Post#: 38519--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Death_by_SallyD Date: June 24, 2019, 4:19 am
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       "watch today for any remnants"
       Why the hell would I do that? LOL  Actually go LOOKING for the
       repeating aspects of "the story" I've been enslaved to.
       Ridiculous!  Thank goodness, I simply forgot....to look for the
       story...and got lost (found) in the clear, translucent field
       that spread out in front of/around me all day long at work
       yesterday (body breathing helped resuspend the field, if
       inertial contraction set in :) )...which required brisk, intense
       activity for 12 hrs straight.  In spite of 3 hours of sleep.
       There's some beliefs, I see, about sleep and "how much?" that
       seem to be put to question in this whole release-to-awareness
       endeavor.  "Enough" seems to be the answer...whether 3 hours or
       more....or less?  Who knows.   Anyways, the energy for activity
       that was needed was there.  The what? and how? of the activity
       just emerged in front of me walking forward and put me and my
       body into motion to "make it so".  Whatever this is....its what
       I want! And after that?  What dreams may come :D
       Thanks again, Jed!!
       #Post#: 38530--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Jed McKenna Date: June 25, 2019, 1:45 am
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       Identity of victim/perpetrator. Experience them both fully.
       Love ya, Jed
       #Post#: 38534--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Death_by_SallyD Date: June 25, 2019, 7:39 am
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       "Identity of victim/perpetrator. Experience them both fully"
       :)
       At first I thought, "true...but also weird non sequitur".
       Remembering yesterday, though, it fits..
       Sailing along at work in continuation of day before's stream of
       awareness.  Then...circumstances, quite suddenly, got hairy.
       Dense and untenable.  One minute, I'm eating salad in break
       room, watching a few mind boggling moments of WWE wrestling that
       was on TV (apropos, don't you think?! :D...all that fake
       contention/altercation with braying, over-muscled, be-tight-ed
       wrestlers..both hairy and dense...posturing on the microphone
       between bouncing off turnbuckles and flying drop-kicks).  All
       the prior ease devolves into density...pressure.....ego
       reaction/anger at having to navigate through the clusterf*ck.
       "Buzzkill!!" :)  Thus identifying as being victim to
       circumstance (perpetrator).  Looking back over the whole of it,
       putting myself in all shoes shodding those involved...the
       opposing roles of each collapse, at least in terms of
       gravity...and become comic from overseer's perspective.  Just
       another wrestling match worth a smile and a laugh.  And now,
       it's gone.  Back to breathing...morning sunshine...the magical
       moment at hand.
       Thanks, Jed!
       #Post#: 38535--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Jed McKenna Date: June 26, 2019, 12:58 am
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       Remember, all entertainment.. ALL!
       Love ya, Jed.
       #Post#: 38537--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Death_by_SallyD Date: June 26, 2019, 6:49 am
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       It's true, it's true!  ALL entertainment :D  Infinity....help me
       remember....
       Speaking of infinity...sometimes it brings messages that are
       shockingly direct.  *BAM!* Others, indirect like an inwardly
       coiling riddle....like a skier skimming along the event
       horizon...the accretion disc...of a whirlpool, leaving a fractal
       rooster-tail spray of glittering water droplets in its wake.
       The motion points to the empty center around which it revolves.
       This morning, during meditation....a Mother Goose poem from
       childhood emerges literally out of nowhere
       Simple Simon met a pieman
       Going to the fair:
       Says Simple Simon to the pieman,
       "Let me taste your ware."
       Say the pieman to Simple Simon,
       "Show me first your penny."
       Says Simple Simon to the pieman,
       "Indeed I have not any."
       Simple Simon went a-fishing
       For to catch a whale:
       All the water he had got
       Was in his mother's pail.
       Inner voice tells me, "Forget grandiose fantasies and pay
       attention to all the small details today.  See what's hidden
       deep within what's taken for granted"
       Thank you, Jed :)
       #Post#: 38547--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Jed McKenna Date: June 27, 2019, 12:37 am
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       ... an thank you my dear...
       #Post#: 38554--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Death_by_SallyD Date: June 27, 2019, 11:04 am
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       Layers of detail yesterday, all of which were a treasure trove
       of depth/intricacy when delved into (body-breathing is the plumb
       line).  This went swimmingly until I ended up at parents’
       orientation meeting for my daughter, who’ll be a freshman in
       college.  I couldn’t penetrate my aversion to administrative
       meetings like this.  My boredom was insurmountable…and that’s on
       me.
       This a.m. gazing into darkness behind closed eyes, looking for
       “sudden onset of strange” more easily available in hypnagogic
       space.  I’m suddenly on the carpeted stairwell leading to the
       2nd floor…and watch as a yellow/orange box of Arm and Hammer
       baking soda trundles, like a toddler, up the stairs all by
       itself.  Then I survey my body lying in bed, which dilates to
       become this transparent expanse within which a foggy, snow
       draped Siberian forest stretches out…with small rolls of
       discomfort along my skin giving rise to various topographic
       features…such as a berm of snow punctuated by an akimbo
       barb-wire fence next to the tree line.  *click* The fog clears,
       my body disappears and I’m looking at a sloping foothill,
       incline to the right bordered by dark moutains dappled with dark
       green alpine conifers. The sky is rich, dark gray
       clouds….beckoning…….beckoning.
       #Post#: 38557--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Jed McKenna Date: June 27, 2019, 11:28 pm
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       You took me there, and admin... it smells of cowards, automatons
       and lost souls.
       Just sayin.....
       Love ya. Jed.
       #Post#: 38558--------------------------------------------------
       Re: "A Truce With Maya"
       By: Death_by_SallyD Date: June 28, 2019, 5:44 am
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       Of which I am all three...at least on the superficial, cowardly,
       automated, lost soul level of my existence. Thus, the vision.
       Thus, the addiction.  Thus, the fair warning (for which, I thank
       you!).  Pleasure oblivion. It's exactly why I am here, I'm sure.
       To learn how to love my addiction...without succumbing to it,
       whole-sale.   To over see.  To not get seduced and lost in a
       lure.  Or to get seduced and lost in a lure, yet to see the
       whole of it?  Yeesh...IDK.  I..don't...know.   ???   There's a
       feeling of gravity?  And yet, the impetus to not take anything
       seriously, to see the truth of the entertainment value of the
       whole production.  Which requires over sight.  It's
       like....."Seriously. Don't take ANYTHING seriously.  No...I'm
       serious. Ya feel?"  :D  How to bring all this together.....grand
       unification.   ??? ??? ???
       Jesus, am I ever in the right place.
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