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       #Post#: 25116--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: Jed McKenna
       Date: November 5, 2016, 10:20 pm
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       Few and far between... hm....  ::) ::) ::)
       Love ya, Jed.
       #Post#: 25138--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: alighazi
       Date: November 6, 2016, 11:51 am
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       I cheated I think Jed, just did the shrooms, I think its was the
       universe wanting me to do it so I did it.
       I experienced a lot of things, including how everything has lead
       to where I'm here now. and I think universe wants me to wake up,
       and is giving me a chance at it.
       we are manifesting things in life all the time, even if we are
       unaware it.
       We keep thinking because we deeply think that we are living in a
       world that is real, but only the thinker is real.
       Ego keeps living as long as we have this false knowledge that
       the world is real.
       If we go deep and remove all the objectives that ego might come
       up with for why this world is real, and convince it from all the
       directions, that its just a dream, then the ego will relax and
       let go of the control. then it knows that it has no power and no
       will in this dream world and will let the universe take care of
       everything, because that is what's happening anyway. and then
       the compulsive thinking will stop. no need to constantly
       practice mindfulness anymore. and the life starts from here.
       it is possible to think your self out of this world, because the
       world itself is held upright by the power of thoughts and
       beliefs.
       The ego dies when this world is destroyed.
       #Post#: 25158--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: Jed McKenna
       Date: November 7, 2016, 6:03 am
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       Perhaps it's the other way round...  ::) ::) ::) :P :P :P ;)
       Love ya, Jed.
       #Post#: 25173--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: alighazi
       Date: November 7, 2016, 4:00 pm
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       it goes both-ways, get rid of one and the other dies too. or
       maybe its just me who feels like ego death = universe death. :-\
       The toughest part of defeating the ego is just defeating the
       intellect, nuking the reasoning and logical part of being out of
       orbit. but first we must make that part as Sharp as possible
       through SA.
       I'm gonna do one hour of SA every morning before starting my day
       from tomorrow, you said it sharpens the mind on its own so I'm
       gonna skip my morning meditation routine and just do SA, giving
       it a fair trial for a month before deciding if its for me or
       not. hopefully dying and fading into black gradually day by day
       a sad tune plays here ;)
       BTW I've a question, if truth is infinite and exists all the
       time and "I am" is the truth, then where does the truth go when
       "I AM" in deep sleep or under anesthesia?
       #Post#: 25177--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: Jed McKenna
       Date: November 8, 2016, 12:09 am
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       The 'I am' is a doorway, you created this universe by using the
       'I am' and, as Ramana said, go back the way you came.
       Contemplate your sense of 'I am', not your thoughts about it.
       This is also what Nis did per his guru's directive.
       Love ya, Jed
       #Post#: 25208--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: alighazi
       Date: November 8, 2016, 2:09 pm
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       yeah I contemplate this sense all the times recently (I'm more
       absent minded these days at work than ever). Though sometimes
       for example when I'm at work and its very busy around me its
       very hard to look at this "I AM" objectively and see it, but
       other times like when I'm home alone I can sense the emptiness
       of this little man clear as day, who have to go (and will go), I
       don't feel depressed about it at all, Just a blend of joy, pity
       and that I will miss him, kinda like the closest friend.
       sentimental BS haha. The sense that I'm dreaming and this is
       just a dream (lucid dreaming) is very hard for me to conjure
       though, happened only a few times overall, long way to go still
       for sure.
       so today I began my first serious SA session, my goal was to
       come up with questions rather than answers, here is a sample of
       it:
       what do I know?
       I know that I'm talking to myself.
       What am I saying?
       To whom am I talking to?
       Who does the talking?
       what is speech?
       what is language?
       what is a symbol?
       what is its purpose?
       ...
       does it lead to anywhere like this?
       #Post#: 25227--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: Jed McKenna
       Date: November 9, 2016, 6:23 am
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       STOP at your second sentence.
       It's full of unkownables, concepts, ideas, thoughts and
       assumptions. You could inquire into your first sentence for
       weeks or months without going any further, no more than that is
       required.
       Now, you tell me what I am talking about.
       Love ya, and waiting... Jed.
       #Post#: 25428--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: alighazi
       Date: November 16, 2016, 3:05 am
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       I don't know what contemplation/inquiry exactly is, and/or what
       you mean by it.
       I tried to contemplate on the second sentence many times as you
       said without writing anything more only trying to prove how the
       sentence "I know that I am talking to myself" can be false. on
       one level it seems very obviously correct and requires no
       explanation but on the other level If I want to prove it by
       dissecting it into its pieces and prove them then I'm
       introducing a lot more concepts which in turn need dissection
       and proof as well and this way I don't think I can get anywhere
       soon. also I tried to only concentrate on it without branching
       into other topics kinda like a mantra but then i know it would
       become a meditation (self deception). of course I can always ask
       myself the question "who is xxx?" which leads to awareness that
       yeah it is the little me who is doing all this, which I want to
       get rid of.
       #Post#: 25430--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: Jed McKenna
       Date: November 16, 2016, 4:17 am
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       Sounds like quite a dog's breakfast.
       Love ya, Jed
       #Post#: 25476--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Vippassana
   DIR By: alighazi
       Date: November 18, 2016, 4:06 am
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       I hate to bring my personal stuff up here but it's hindering my
       progress badly and I think its 100% ego related so learning to
       deal with it can be helpful at dealing with it in other places
       as well.
       I have this insomnia for the past year, could kinda control it
       with meditation but since I've stopped meditation it's back. I
       start to feel anxious when I want to go to bed because needing
       to be in control (futile), needing to feel restful for the next
       day, needing to have energy to stay on my schedule for the next
       day etc, and when the body doesn't cooperate with ego's desire
       it turns into anger and anxiety which further helps the
       insomnia.
       I know deeply that control/resistance is futile and what will
       happen will happen anyway, I try to meditate on it in bed. but I
       think the insomnia doesn't start in bed, it starts the moment
       that I define a schedule and goals for myself? I know deeply
       that there is no such a thing as a shitty day even if I'm
       drained of energy like a zombie and I should not mind anything.
       but still there is some ego because I'm trying to surrender in
       order to have a good sleep  ;D which in turn keeps the insomnia
       in place stronger than ever  ::) as in trying to kill your ego
       to live with open eyes.
       **** treating insomnia, because who is here to suffer from it
       anyway? my question is if you had to choose between a slow and
       painful death vs a quick and painless one which one would you
       choose and why?
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