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#Post#: 5539--------------------------------------------------
5 May 2018 - A Day of Meetings and a New Boy in the House
By: Jack Date: May 5, 2018, 6:01 pm
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I had a couple of meetings today about the new restaurant, which
I detailed elsewhere.
Seth Lane's dad, William, had called last night and asked if I
could meet with them this afternoon. I agreed, of course, and
learned that 'them', was he, his wife, Jill, and their second
oldest son, 17-year old Joel.
Before that meeting but after the restaurant one, I attended
Kenny's soccer game. They're not in the running for first place
anymore, but they're still having a winning season, and today
was a nice day, so it was fun.
One of the fullbacks is an average size, pretty cute, sixth
grader - 12 years old. He pulled off a pretty impressive slide
tackle to save a point, but he had a blowout when he did it. He
wasn't hurt, but his shorts were toast. Someone had a towel
they let him use, and I had a spare pair of shorts that would
probably fit him, so I escorted him to our car, and opened the
door, so he could hide behind it while he changed. Then I went
to the other side to dig out the shorts. He pulled his shorts
off from beneath the towel, and I tossed him the other shorts
and stood up. As I stood, he dropped the towel - he was wearing
a jock strap and the boy has a very nice little rear. I managed
to keep from whistling or joking, and we were back at the game
in only a couple of minutes - plenty of time to watch our team
pull off a victory.
After that, I got home and had a late lunch in plenty of time to
host the Lane's.
It turns out I'm going to be getting a new boy.
The Lane's have lived here nearly six years now, and we've been
friends almost that entire time. They're not native Texans
here, and William and Jill both explained that, while they love
it, they hate the hot weather, and they miss their old home.
Like many people, they moved here because of a business
opportunity. Now, William has been offered a chance to take a
promotion and move back to their old area. They both agree
they'd be crazy not to take it, especially since Seth is going
to college in that area.
The thing is, Joel has been here since he was 11. He finished
elementary school, did middle school, and his first three years
of high school here. His best friends are here, his girl friend
is here, he has a good shot at first chair trombone, he has a
good shot at team captain in baseball, and he has a good shot at
Student Body President. Needless to say, what he doesn't have
is a good shot at being happy about moving.
So yeah, like happened with DMK's house last year, Joel will be
living with me next year, after his family moves.
While I have some discussion to do, I already know how I'm going
to accommodate the addition.
Clayton Foxley moved in with us in Dec of 13, which was his
senior year. It was supposed to be just temporary, while he and
his mom sorted things out. It was supposed to be just
temporary, but his mom didn't need to sort things out - she was
right, and things would be better if the world just realized
that.
I have no problem with him staying, and I have no trouble with
taking care of his college. He does help with the kids from
time to time and around the house. He's really not a problem.
As a matter of fact, it's kind of hard to explain how I feel
about him, because he hasn't been a problem. I think what
bothers me is that he's been going to college full-time for four
years now, and he's still not close to graduating. He tries
this and that, and he may have changed his major six times. I'm
okay with exploring and figuring things out, but I kind of feel
like he's taking advantage of the situation.
I'd been considering this for a while, and I've decided I'm
going to make an ultimatum to Clayton. My real suggestion is
that he graduate in anything next year, and then he apply to be
a student assistant, and he can work on a graduate degree in
what he really wants to do. Heck, if he likes university life
this much, maybe he can get a full time job there. I just feel
like he needs to set a goal and start working towards it, rather
than just meandering around.... Which is rather the same
problem my brother Jason has with his oldest son, Huck, now that
I think about it.
Anyway, I'm going to ask Clayton to move out. I'll probably let
him live in one of my college apartments, and I'll still help
with the bills, but I'm that will still require him to start
functioning as an adult in some ways - doing his own shopping
and cooking and stuff. It might also help solve another problem
I've had with him. For some reason, he's never felt like part
of the family to me. He feels less like a son that does someone
like Chandler or Bruce or KC. If he really wants to be part of
the family, having him move away will show it, since he'll
actually have to make an effort to be here.
When he's gone, I'm going to move Jeremy into the garage
apartment, and Joel will move into the room with Parker, since
the two of them have been spending the night together for years
and are very close friends.
In the meantime, the Lane's aren't moving until July. It looks
like I'll have the younger boys for a while, as they already
have space reserved at camp. Seth will definitely be home
before the Bransom schools finish, and he'll be home until
they're ready to move, so we'll get to visit with him. Right
now, Joel is intending to travel with them when they move, and
he'll fly straight to band camp from there, then he'll come back
here and have about a week before the marching band starts
practicing.
#Post#: 5542--------------------------------------------------
Re: 5 May 2018 - A Day of Meetings and a New Boy in the House
By: Adric Date: May 5, 2018, 8:17 pm
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[quote author=Jack link=topic=551.msg5539#msg5539
date=1525561306]
As I stood, he dropped the towel - he was wearing a jock strap
and the boy has a very nice little rear.
[/quote]
Soccer is very good for that.
[quote author=Jack link=topic=551.msg5539#msg5539
date=1525561306]
The thing is, Joel has been here since he was 11. He finished
elementary school, did middle school, and his first three years
of high school here. His best friends are here, his girl friend
is here, he has a good shot at first chair trombone, he has a
good shot at team captain in baseball, and he has a good shot at
Student Body President. Needless to say, what he doesn't have
is a good shot at being happy about moving.
[/quote]
A move at this point would really have turned his life
upside-down. It's great that you found a way to save him from a
disastrous move.
#Post#: 5556--------------------------------------------------
Re: 5 May 2018 - A Day of Meetings and a New Boy in the House
By: kalico Date: May 6, 2018, 1:27 pm
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Sounds like a great plan for all involved and I hope everything
works for both boys.....
Hugs kal
#Post#: 5599--------------------------------------------------
Re: 5 May 2018 - A Day of Meetings and a New Boy in the House
By: David M. Katz Date: May 9, 2018, 12:48 am
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[quote author=Jack link=topic=551.msg5539#msg5539
date=1525561306]
So yeah, like happened with DMK's house last year, Joel will be
living with me next year, after his family moves.
Anyway, I'm going to ask Clayton to move out.
[/quote]
I have been really happy to have Isaac around. He has been
helpful to me and he has thrived and seemed very happy. I
suspect Joel will do well. This is good of you to bring him in.
I thought you had already asked Clayton to move. I know you
have been thinking in that direction for a while. Sometimes you
just have to push them out of the nest and let them fly.
#Post#: 5603--------------------------------------------------
Re: 5 May 2018 - A Day of Meetings and a New Boy in the House
By: Jack Date: May 9, 2018, 2:04 am
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[quote author=David M. Katz link=topic=551.msg5599#msg5599
date=1525844939]
I have been really happy to have Isaac around. He has been
helpful to me and he has thrived and seemed very happy. I
suspect Joel will do well. This is good of you to bring him in.
I thought you had already asked Clayton to move. I know you
have been thinking in that direction for a while. Sometimes you
just have to push them out of the nest and let them fly.
[/quote]
Joel isn't in a similar situation to Isaac (for those of you who
don't know/remember - Isaac/Mop has a very religious, overly
strict mother who sometimes seemed to go out of her way to make
his life miserable). On the other hand, it's obvious that being
able to finish school here, where he has so much going on, is a
huge deal for him.
David, I've been considering asking Clayton to move for a while,
and I may have even said I was going to do it, but I don't like
to do that. I prefer to let the boys mature on their own
timeline. I especially didn't want Clayton to feel I was
kicking him out just to get the apartment. However, while I
don't think he's doing it deliberately, I do think he's taking
advantage of the situation, and he's never been the help to me
guys like Chris and Bobby and PJ were. I'll be honest that,
while I both like and love Clayton, and I enjoy spending time
with him when we do, he's never felt like part of the family
like most of the rest of my boys. I'm sure there are reasons
for that, but sometimes you have to prioritize and make
decisions that are best for the most number of people.
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