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       #Post#: 468--------------------------------------------------
       Greg Garza
       By: Jack Date: September 27, 2017, 5:02 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Greg's birthday is 8 August 1997, so he just turned 20.  I met
       him when he was still 18, in May of '16.
       Here's what I said about him then.
       [quote]"Cal has taken some of the pressure off me, because he
       won't be living here this summer (yes, he has a job, but he
       doesn't start it until fall).
       Back in January, Cal met a freshman named Greg Garza. The two
       were introduced, when a friend of Cal's found out that Greg had
       lived in a cheap hotel for a few weeks at Christmas. It turns
       out that Greg was a foster kid who never found a forever family.
       While his college is covered, there are times the dorms close,
       and he had no fallback.
       I didn't learn any of this until Spring Break, when I found out
       that Cal had 'loaned' Greg some money, so he was a bit short.
       Greg was supposed to be taking summer school, but something got
       screwed up somewhere. Greg thought it was all covered, but
       apparently he had to put in a request for it, which he didn't
       get done in time. That means he now owes me money (I 'bought'
       his debt from Cal), and he has no place to live until school
       starts this fall.
       On the other hand, I have student apartments that stand mostly
       empty from mid-May until late August.
       I bought Greg a bus ticket from there to here, and he's living
       rent free in one of those apartments. To pay back the money he
       already owes me, and to have extra for next year, he's doing a
       lot of the basic maintenance work that needs to be done. Jason
       and I will both be working with him, but he'll be doing basic
       yard work, some light repair and clean up work, and making sure
       that contractors show up and do what needs to be done.
       Cal liked the sound of that better than working in the comic
       stores again, and there's definitely enough work for more than
       one person, so he and Greg are sharing one of the two bedrooms.
       While they do have a working refrigerator (I checked), they've
       been over here for dinner most nights."[/quote]
       There was a bit more, but the next relevant post was
       [quote]"I've known (loosely) about Greg Garza for two or three
       months now. I only met him a couple of weeks ago. You can read
       what I've said so far in two posts in Cal's Bio.
       While I believe his last name is Spanish, you can't tell it by
       looking at him. Greg is nearly 19, but he hasn't filled out
       through the chest and shoulders yet (though he does have a firm
       chest and a flat, slightly rippled stomach (and a nicely rounded
       little backside). He's not especially big - a bit smaller than
       Zeke and Bryce - maybe 5'8"" or 9"", and I'd guess around 130 or
       135 (that's about 173 cm and 60 kg). The thing is, he has a dark
       auburn hair which really looks like a deep brown, unless you see
       it in direct light (his is slightly darker than Noah's), and he
       has fair skin and freckles.
       Greg started as half friend, half tagalong with Cal, but he's
       quickly become friends with a lot of the boys here. He's good
       with younger kids (and enjoys playing with some of the toys, it
       seems), he is really into sports, and has hit it off with Noah
       and Mickey both, he's interested in MMA, though he's never been
       able to participate, and he likes to draw. He also likes to
       read. While he's not into comics or fantasy, he likes some
       sci-fi, and he reads a lot of mystery and horror, so we have
       some tastes in common.
       When he first got here, he stayed in a small apartment, while we
       got the one he and Cal are sharing cleaned up and ready. When we
       moved them in, he had one duffle bag - not particularly big,
       that some people would only use for a gym bag.
       While I've cleaned a lot of the younger kids stuff out of the
       hand-me-down closet, I have enough growing boys that I've kept
       most of the outgrown teen stuff. I saw no reason that Greg
       should have to do laundry two or three times a week, when we
       have a closet full of perfectly good clothes that are standing
       unused.
       Sunday, I took him down to the basement and started getting out
       clothes. He stripped to his boxer briefs (which had a small rip
       and a couple of holes) (he has almost no body hair, but does
       have what looked like a nice package). We managed to get most of
       the things a young man should have - several pair of jeans, some
       casual slacks, shorts, shirts in several styles, some dress
       slacks and shirts, and a duffle and backpack. With all that
       stacked up, I told him we'd go yesterday (we had to postpone it
       because of my illness, but we'll go tomorrow) to get him new
       socks, underclothes, shoes, belt, tie, and whatever else he
       might need.
       I guess I should have been more gradual in mentioning this -
       maybe lead up to it over a few days - but he started sobbing,
       and when I tried to talk to him, he just collapsed. I assured
       Greg I was doing it for selfish reasons, and that it was no big
       deal to me.
       I suppose I kind of saw it coming, though. He and I were talking
       Saturday afternoon about how crazy things get around here, and I
       told him that Monday wasn't going to be any better, even though
       it was going to be family only. He got this look on his face,
       then commented on having a book he wanted to catch up on, unless
       I wanted him to work Monday. ""I don't think you're going to
       have time to read over here, Greg.""
       ""I can come?""
       ""Of course."" That time he managed to excuse himself to the
       bathroom before he got messy, but I'm not going to swear he
       didn't.
       I've explained to Greg that, if we'd met him when he was a
       freshman in high school, instead of a freshman in college, we
       would have found room for him. As it is, he's an adult, and can
       obviously take care of himself, but there's no reason we
       shouldn't give him a little help when he needs it."[/quote]
       [quote]"Greg is still doing well. I think he and I have reached
       an understanding with each other. Very honestly, if I'd known
       him when he was a freshman in high school, I would have tried to
       bring him home. He's just finished his freshman year in college,
       and he's trying very hard to be self-reliant. The problem is,
       when you have to take so many hours of school to keep your
       'scholarship', and housing outside the dorms is very expensive,
       it puts one in a tight place.
       Basically Greg is going to be working for me for three months.
       When you figure that as an annual salary, I'm paying him very
       well, but not huge. On the other hand, he's also getting free
       rent and utilities while he's out of school, and he's probably
       eating at least 10 meals over here each week (most of them with
       Cal).
       I gave him a lot of hand me down stuff, which he was resistant
       to, until I pointed out that we've always given it to friends,
       as well as little (and occasionally older) brothers. He did
       throw a fit about me taking him shopping for the other stuff he
       needed, until I agreed to take it out of his pay.
       The honest truth is that I'm paying him a 'salary' based on
       slightly more than forty hour weeks. So far, I think there's
       only been one when he needed to work more than twenty. I'm able
       to help him out, and he's happy that he's earning his own way
       (hopefully, in a few years, when he realizes how much I overpaid
       him, he'll be more willing to accept it).
       Anyway, Bobby has decided he's ready for a new car. Except a
       couple of minor dents and moderately high mileage (136K, I
       think), there's nothing wrong with it. I've always taught my
       kids to take great care with their cars. He's just been working
       for a while now, and wants something newer. Since car places
       never pay crap for used cars, I'm just paying him $500. I'm
       going down to get it today, and it will be Austin's to use. I'm
       still deciding if I'm going to give it to him as a business car,
       then let him take it to school, or if I'll sell it to him,
       taking payment out of his salary.
       Either way, I think he'll get a lot more use out of it than a
       car lot would."[/quote]
       [quote]"I'll talk more about Cal and the other college boys
       elsewhere (and I'll try to do it soon). For now, let me say that
       Cal is moving soon. I told him that I need him and Greg out of
       their apartment, so they maid service can give it a thorough
       before the new tenants move in on Saturday. I asked him to be
       out Wednesday evening, so the Service can get to work ASAP on
       Thursday morning (we did most of the work on it before the boys
       moved in, but we're having the carpet cleaned again, and the
       Service giving it a full go over).I think I mentioned that to
       Cal last Friday. Yesterday, Greg came over to talk to me.
       While almost all the schools in Texas are starting 22 August,
       the U where Greg attends (and Cal attended) starts a week later.
       The dorms don't even open until next Monday. Greg was asking me
       to help him check where the cheapest hotel would be and when he
       needed to plan his bus fare.
       ""Greg, I just need you out of the apartment, because we have
       new tenants moving in. All my college kids will be gone by
       Friday, so there's no reason you shouldn't stay here until next
       week. With Jeremy gone, you can sleep in with Bryce, until we
       get the college rooms cleaned. Then you can have your own room.
       And there's no reason to take the bus. I bought that car cheap.
       It's still in good shape, but it's not worth much, and I don't
       need it with you and Cal gone, so you should just keep it.""His
       eyes were very wide by this point.
       ""While we're on the subject, I checked, and you're only out for
       Thanksgiving for three days, so we'll get you plane tickets as
       soon as you get your syllabi, and we can decide if Tuesday or
       Wednesday morning is better. After that, you can decide if you
       want to drive back for Christmas, or if you'd rather fly.""
       ""Here? Come back here?""
       ""Yes. Don't you want to?""
       ""But.. Those are holidays.""
       ""Right.""
       ""For families!"" he protested.
       ""Yes, for families, and we're yours. Unless you think we're too
       crazy."
       "That's as far as it got before he started crying, and I was
       only a few second behind him.
       I did have to threaten him with his very first ever spanking to
       get him to quit arguing with me about it. He did go ask several
       of the kids if they minded if he came here for Thanksgiving and
       Christmas. The basic answer was 'why wouldn't you come here? Why
       would we mind?"" (They did think I'd actually spanked him at
       first, since he was very red faced and eyed).
       He's still having a bit of trouble with me. I told him that,
       despite being a virgin, he's big enough and old enough that I'll
       probably have to use the hairbrush, if not the bath brush, the
       first time I paddle him. He finally shut up and agreed to my
       terms, which are basically the same thing all the other kids get
       - I'm covering his expenses (that the state doesn't cover as
       part of his fostering), his insurance, and a small allowance. If
       he wants to do things beyond the allowance, he has to pay for it
       on his own (but the money he's earned this summer is going into
       a bank account, so he has money). In return, I'm letting him pay
       for all the stuff we agreed he'd pay for over the summer,
       including the new clothes he got.
       He turned 19 over the summer, and he never had a forever home,
       so I don't expect him to fit in like Van and Kenny have, but
       he's a good kid and we all like him, so I have no problem with
       offering him a place to come."[/quote]
       This was the end of that summer.
       [quote]"Greg went to work with me yesterday. I'd finished all
       the paperwork Monday, so he helped me pull the back stock order
       for the stores, then we did the deliveries.
       After that, we went to Reuben's for lunch. He had the open-faced
       roast beef with green bean casserole. I had a Reuben (on egg
       bread, I don't like Rye) with no Russian dressing and a bag of
       chips. He loved it, and he had to go around and look at all the
       posters that were up (school related right now, of course).
       After that, we did his shopping. We'd already got most of the
       stuff he needed, but we got some cool weather stuff. I'd already
       had a jacket and coat to let him have, but we got him a couple
       of hoodies, a couple of thermal tops, a pair of thermal bottoms,
       house shoes, flannel sheets, and a comforter. There were a few
       more odds and ends, but I think that's most of it. He should
       have enough clothes to get through a week of hot or cold
       weather, and maybe an extra day or two in emergencies, without
       having to worry about laundry. We also went and got him a bank
       card.
       Because of the situation, and the short amount of time I've
       known him, I decided not to give him credit cards like I would
       for other college boys (one gas card and one for emergencies).
       Instead, we opened an account in his name, and he got a debit
       card, so I can deposit an allowance for him.
       He stayed home today, binging and napping, and I think he's
       looking forward to heading off tomorrow, to set up his new stuff
       and test his new situation. The two of us have sat down and had
       a couple of long discussions though. I think he's finally
       beginning to truly accept that I don't want anything from him -
       just his happiness. However, he knows how I run this house, and
       I have told him that, if he does decide to come back here for
       the holidays, that I do expect him to follow the rules and set a
       good example for the other boys. I also explained that, since
       I'm paying his insurance, I expect him to use good judgement
       when driving and to notify me right away if anything happens. He
       seems just fine with that idea.
       The funny thing is, he's almost like dealing with one of our
       feral cats. It's taken all summer and a lot of patience, but he
       no longer jumps and runs if I try to pet (hug) him. I think he's
       starting to consider the idea that being domesticated might be
       okay."[/quote]
       There is a maximum post length, so the rest of this will be in
       the next post.
       #Post#: 469--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: Jack Date: September 27, 2017, 5:03 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       And when he was back at school.
       [quote]"I've mentioned this in chat, but thought I should also
       share it here.
       Greg has been back at school for about ten days now, and has
       called me a number of times.
       The first time he called me was that Thursday (25 Aug) to let me
       know he'd arrived back on time.
       He called me again on Friday. He'd found his old roommate and
       mentioned that he needed to run up to Target to get a few
       things. It turns out the other fellow lost his car over the
       summer, and the insurance (he was hit) wasn't paying enough to
       get a new one. His parents were trying to find one they could
       afford, but he's without transportation for now. He apologized
       that he couldn't offer Greg a ride, but Greg was very happy to
       offer him one.
       Greg sounded almost apologetic while he told me about it, but it
       sounds like he wasn't sure how to tell this fellow that he'd
       fallen into another foster family. I had to laugh a little bit.
       ""Well, you know I'm used to hand-me-downs, and Cal wasn't using
       him anymore, so...""
       Saturday, he used some of the money he'd earned over the summer
       to take that former roommate, another friend whom he'd known
       before college, and a girl he likes to the movies. Last year,
       especially in the second semester, when he was really low on
       money, the three of them (and Cal) had helped him out where they
       could, which includes paying for him to see a few special movies
       (Deadpool, Batman v Superman, and Civil War, as examples), and
       they even made sure he had snacks. There was nothing special
       playing, but he took them all to see Mechanic: Resurrection, so
       he feels he's paid them back a little.
       He then called last Thursday. He'd been to all his classes,
       including a lab, by then. He'd double checked when he would be
       through with classes on Tuesday, and we sat down and figured out
       when he could fly. I picked his tickets up Thursday and mailed
       them to him.
       He called again over the weekend, just to talk about his classes
       and asked how everyone was doing. I think he just likes having
       someone to call."[/quote]
       And when he got in trouble.
       [quote][center]"BOTD 9/26/16 ""Greg's Issue"" A Jack
       Production[/center]
       Greg is the newest member of your family.  He spent 3, 178 days
       in foster care, before turning 18.  Twice he was nearly adopted,
       but both times, issues beyond his control stopped it and moved
       him elsewhere.  His last foster family was interested in
       adopting, but they wanted an older child.  He stayed with them
       to finish college, and talks to them occasionally, but has tried
       to move on so they can handle the younger children.
       You met him when he came home with one of your foster children.
       After spending the summer helping out and hanging out, your
       family invited him to join.  He accepted.  He's mostly a good
       fit with your family - he likes your (other) kids, and they all
       seem to like him.
       Greg is back at school now.  He called you quite a bit at first,
       but now he's a bit more comfortable (and busier with school),
       but he still calls once or twice a week, and is looking forward
       to his first 'family Thanksgiving.' Today, Greg called you and
       sounded pretty worried.  You recognized the tone, because he was
       constantly worried about taking advantage of you, when you first
       met him, and even later.
       He explains to you that he just got a speeding ticket for going
       66 in a 55, and it's going to run about $200.  He has some money
       of his own, that he earned over the summer, but the two of you
       decided to put most of that into savings, to hold for school
       expenses.  You give him money for one tank of gas each week and
       a fifty dollar allowance for fun and general expenses, as well
       as paying his car insurance.  He tells you that he's been saving
       a bit back, so he and some friends can go to some haunted houses
       next month, but that's only sixty dollars, and he has to pay the
       ticket within twelve days.  Before you can say anything, he also
       points out that a friend of his, who got a ticket last year,
       says his insurance is probably going to go up as well.
       ""I'm really sorry.  Do I gotta get paddled when I come
       home?"""[/quote]
       And what happened (sorry, but other replies weren't saved, as
       far as I know).
       [quote]"An interesting idea, though I went at it from the other
       side.
       The first thing I did was to assure Greg that I wouldn't paddle
       anyone (even a 16-year old) for this situation - not for a first
       timer, and not without special circumstances (a school zone, for
       instance).
       We talked about him taking the money out of his savings, but
       that's supposed to be either savings or emergency stuff. I was
       having to guide him with leading questions from time to time,
       but we decided it would be most fair for the money to come out
       of his allowance. We decided on lowering his allowance $10 a
       week until Thanksgiving. At that point, he can do some work
       around the stores to earn enough to pay off the rest (he'll work
       the night crew to do all the Christmas decorating on the night
       of Thanksgiving). He will also have to pay a penalty for
       'borrowing' against his allowance, which I'll probably just set
       at one additional week's reduction.
       Because he's using my house as his permanent address for some
       stuff now, and because he's on my insurance, there may not be an
       increase. We'll have to wait and see. If there is, we'll
       probably reduce his allowance to pay for it, though I won't hold
       it on there forever, but long enough to make a point about being
       careful and also about budgeting.
       Now, if he gets another ticket before this one is paid off, THEN
       we might talk about the paddle."[/quote]
       Home for Thanksgiving
       [quote]"Greg arrived yesterday evening. It's only a little over
       an hour, but you still have airport security. That wasn't too
       horrible since it was a smaller airport, but he wasn't the only
       college kid catching a flight, and he's never flown before, so
       we added plenty of time.
       I made a plate of leftovers for him when he arrived. Except the
       Marsh kids (and some of the guests) he knows everybody, but he
       hasn't been here in three months. He was very shy, and I'm
       pretty sure he's overwhelmed. He beamed when he was welcomed
       home, so I'm sure he's going to get over it.
       He'd pulled a couple of late nights, so he could get a big
       assignment finished and turned in before leaving, so he went to
       bed fairly early last night (he actually fell asleep on the
       couch, so I woke him and took him upstairs). We didn't have a
       chance to talk much, and we do talk once or twice a week anyway,
       but it sounds like things are going well."[/quote]
       And Christmas
       [quote]"It's been kind of funny with Greg. He's a good kid, but
       he's afraid of commitment right now.
       I can understand that. He had several foster homes, and none
       ever worked out for him. He'd pretty much gotten used to the
       idea that he was alone in life - at least until he finds a wife
       one day. Then we come on him like an avalanche. That has to be a
       bit disconcerting. And honestly, he's probably waiting for the
       other shoe to drop. He already has his armor in place and he's
       not sure he wants to let anyone inside it.
       As my long time readers may remember, our Tribal party involves
       a visit from Santa Claus, who's played by my half-brothers
       step-father, who lives near Chicago. Even a lot of my adult kids
       aren't sure who he really is. Since we started using the tents,
       we have a special room curtained off, where the gifts and a big
       chair wait for Santa. When Papa Joe arrives, he sneaks in there,
       then we open the curtains and everyone comes in. The gifts are
       mostly for the kids, but the adults get something as well.
       Usually, once you graduate college, you move to the adult
       section.
       Two of the gifts (for the kids) are pretty standard - they get
       'underwear' (with a gift card hidden with it) and a donation
       made in their name to an appropriate charity. The third gift
       varies and has been books, games, puzzles, toys. This year we
       went with 'puzzle games' (like Keva Brain Builders).
       Now, because little kids have SO much patience, we start with
       them and go up more or less chronologically. It takes a while,
       so sometimes we change the order a bit, to keep kids from the
       same family from being right after each other, so opening and
       pictures can occur, while Santa goes on to the next kid.
       We were up past the high school kids - ""Johnny, Tim Malone,
       Palmer Russo, Josh, Greg...""
       It was going a bit faster with the older kids. Santa usually
       just got a quick pic with his arm around them, since several of
       them would have put a dent in his lap. But when he reached Greg,
       he called a second time, and I started looking around. Then he
       called a third time, about the time I saw Greg.
       I think that's the moment that Greg realized we were serious
       about him being a part of the family.
       I motioned for Santa to skip on, and I quickly grabbed Greg and
       escorted him out of the room so he could recover.
       We got some privacy. I wasn't sure if he wanted me to leave him
       alone or not, but since I don't think I could have gotten his
       arms from around my neck with WD-40 and a pry bar, I decided to
       stay.
       When he finally stopped crying, I felt him pull back a bit, so I
       let him go.
       ""You really want me?""
       ""Of course. I wouldn't have asked if we didn't.""
       ""Why?""
       It's a hard question to answer, but I've had practice with it
       now.
       ""Because we're better with you than without you.""
       He's still acting like a long tailed cat, but he seems a lot
       more open - a lot less cool - than he was."[/quote]
       If there was anything else written about Greg, it was lost.
       He's a good kid, and a big help.  He's almost always happy to
       jump in an help.  I think he's still a bit phobic about
       commitment, but he's getting over it.  He does still call on a
       regular basis.  He doesn't push for things, and he's not gotten
       into any real trouble (he had one curfew violation, but I ended
       up grounding him for it).  There have been a couple of times I
       thought he was going to push for a paddling, but he backed off.
       I would really prefer not to paddle him, but I think he'd accept
       it if I decided it was required.  While he does have a bit of
       anger just at the whole situation, he's basically just a really
       good kid.
       #Post#: 494--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: David M. Katz Date: September 28, 2017, 2:12 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       This is a lot of good information.  It is good that it could be
       salvaged.
       #Post#: 727--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: Jack Date: October 8, 2017, 9:03 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Thought  I should remember to cross-link.  Greg and i had a talk
       yesterday about his recent problem with traffic tickets, and it
       was reported in the BOTD Extra: An Interesting Topic.
  HTML https://jackshouse.createaforum.com/botd/6-october-2017-an-interesting-topic-a-jack-rl-production/
       #Post#: 1749--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: Jack Date: November 24, 2017, 5:07 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Just thought I'd mention that Greg did finish paying off the
       lawyer who's defending his tickets.  He also worked on putting
       up Christmas decorations in the store last night.  We decided to
       split his pay.  Half of it is his, free and clear.  The other
       half, I'm putting back in case of more expenses, either with his
       lawyer, or with the need to take defensive driving.
       #Post#: 6232--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: Jack Date: June 6, 2018, 4:20 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Greg is mostly a quiet, but good kid.  And by quiet,  don't mean
       he doesn't make much noise - I just mean that he doesn't make
       much disturbance.  For the most part, it seems like he hangs
       back and watches things, but when we turn the spotlight on him,
       he seems to really love it.
       We first met Greg at the end of his freshman year, which was two
       years ago now.  Since then, he's changed his major (in his mind,
       if not on paper) probably six times.  One of the greatest
       failings I see in today's public education system is that they
       convince all these kids that they have to go to college, but
       they do almost nothing to help the kids decide why they should
       go (for what goal, I mean).
       While I've been really busy these past few weeks, Greg managed
       to dig up all his old report cards, and he and I sat down and
       looked at them.  I wasn't too worried about the actual grades,
       but he's kept up a solid 3.something average, which is good.
       Mostly I wanted to remind myself of the classes he's taken.  He
       has a good solid... background? of classes. He's actually in the
       College of Arts and Sciences, and pursuing and actual major in
       'General Studies'.  The thing is, he has no idea what he's
       actually going to do with it.  To me, it sounds like a great
       thing to do, if you plan to go immediately for a masters, but as
       a degree unto itself, I'm not sure how much use it is except as
       a degree.
       I've pretty much given him an assignment to review all the
       different majors his U offers.  He's supposed to be starting his
       senior year this fall, but I have no problem if he needs to
       backtrack a bit.  I'm going to sit down with him once or twice a
       week, just to see what he's found that seems interesting, and to
       talk kind of in general about the future.  I know Mr. C has some
       'interests test' that help kids figure out what kind of career
       they might like to follow, and I might hit him up for one of
       those, if we can't find something out this way.
       Also, you might have figured this out from the simple fact that
       Greg didn't appear in the Spanking Reports.  I don't know if he
       just needed a taste of the paddle or what, but his driving
       settled down a lot after last Halloween.  I do know that he
       seems to have been riding with friends more often since then.
       His lawyer got the tickets dismissed.  To me, it always looked a
       little fishy, based on Google Map pictures of where it happened,
       but that's not much basis for a solid decision.  After that, I
       restored his allowance to normal, and put the rest of the money
       I'd held back into his savings account.
       #Post#: 6233--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: kalico Date: June 6, 2018, 9:37 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       That good that the charges were dropped and all is good on that
       front...
       Good luck on figuring things out and I hope it all works and he
       finds something....
       Thanks for the update Jack....
       Hugs kal
       #Post#: 7553--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: Jack Date: July 25, 2018, 3:59 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Had an argument with Greg today.
       He'd asked to talk to me, so I took him to run around the
       stores, so we'd have some private time.
       He started out explaining to me that he's decided to change his
       major, which will probably delay him graduating by a full year.
       He wont' have to take a full years worth of classes, so he can
       work part-time and make money to help defray the extra costs,
       but he won't be able to work enough to pay for all of it.
       Last month, Greg was working full-time to help get the Imagarium
       up and running.  Since that happened, he's only been getting
       about 20 hours a week.  He asked if he can get more.
       I told him I don't want him working while he's at college.
       Instead, he should use the extra time and take some classes that
       interest him, but for which he's not had time.  Then I explained
       that we don't have extra hours right now, and that I prefer to
       give more hours to the kids who need them.  Since I cover all
       his expenses, he really doesn't need them.
       It turns out that another thing Greg had wanted to talk about
       was him going on a ski trip with some friends of his, leaving
       when school lets out for Christmas (I think he said 12 Dec) and
       arriving home the next Monday (17 Dec?).  That's more than a
       week before Christmas, and I don't think the kids and I get out
       until the 18th, so that's no problem at all.  It is, however,
       the reason he wanted to work full-time for the rest of the
       summer.  I just asked how much he's short to pay off the trip.
       Apparently I'm extremely unreasonable.  He was already ticked at
       me, because he had a very long explanation of why changing
       majors would be best, and why he really needs to do it, but also
       how it's not really his fault, because he didn't fully
       understand what he wanted to do, and he was a Chemistry major
       when what he really wanted to do was Chemical Engineering, and
       he didn't want to put me out and hated to even ask, and I didn't
       even let him explain.  Then, to make it worse, I won't even let
       him earn the money for his trip, and he's been trying to save,
       but there's so much going on, and he almost has enough....
       I'm pretty sure he crossed over from ticked to panic attack at
       some point.
       I'm guessing at this, but he let slip a couple of things that
       make me strongly believe it.  He's worried about me (or the
       kids) getting mad at him because he's 'taking too much'.
       I've actually had this kind of thing happen before, with other
       people - especially ones who move in with me when they're older.
       I pulled the car over.
       "Greg.  You're a good person.  I love you.  I think of you as my
       son, and the boys consider you one of their brothers.  I have
       never offered you anything I couldn't afford to give you, you've
       never taking anything from anyone, and I enjoy being able to do
       things for you."
       He broke down.  I broke down.  It took a minute, but he let me
       hold him for a bit.
       So, he's going to re-plan his schedule for the next two years,
       and take some electives that sound interesting, but for which
       he's not had time.  I paid for his spot on the ski trip  He gave
       me the money to cover most of it, and he'll work the rest off at
       Thanksgiving and Christmas - after he gets home from the trip.
       #Post#: 7559--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: Leti Date: July 25, 2018, 8:53 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Hugs Jack and Greg!
       It is good the Greg knows what he is going to be majoring in,
       and that he is going skiing with his friends on December.
       After both of you melting down, I guess he will accept he is
       part of the family. :)
       Have you talked about Adult Adoption with him?
       Thanks for sharing
       Hugs
       Leti
       #Post#: 7572--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Greg Garza
       By: kalico Date: July 26, 2018, 2:58 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Awww I’m happy it all worked out to everyone’s satisfaction...
       Hope he enjoys his trip....
       Good luck to him with the new classes
       Hugs kal
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