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#Post#: 8575--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: Jack Date: September 5, 2018, 6:09 am
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Dillon, Ed, and Drake did sleep over here on Saturday and Sunday
nights (though they went home Sunday).
Saturday was a planned night for the kids to have a small group
of friends over. Ed and Drake get along well with Connor and
Curtis, so there was no problem there. All of us (all my kids
and a guest for everyone) squeezed into the theater and we
watched Avengers: Infinity War, plus some cartoons and stuff.
We started with fajita nachos for dinner, then had popcorn,
candy, and soda. It was a fun evening.
Dillon and I did sleep together Saturday night, but that's as
far as it went.
Sunday was a pretty quiet day with everyone catching up. We
didn't have a lot of guests over, and we didn't do anything big.
We probably had close to as many people as normal, but it was
all smaller groups, and it just seemed quieter.
Dillon brought the boys back over Sunday evening, which ended up
not being a good thing for them.
Monday was Labor Day, so Sunday wasn't a school night, but I
made it very clear to the boys that that wasn't a license to
stay up very late. Dillon was right there, so I was able to
double check that I was very clear about the rules. Despite
that, when it came time to start getting ready for bed, I still
gave them another, very specific, warning when they started
ignoring me and offering passive resistance.
Long story short, since I'm sure you see exactly where this is
going, and nothing they did was particularly funny or unique,
they all ended up getting a taste of the Tailblazer. I managed
to get Ed and Curtis both over my lap together, and I gave them
both a good dose. Since Drake is the oldest by more than just a
bit, and because he's spent a lot of time over here, I let
Connor go next. Drake was NOT happy about that. Now, these
weren't barnburners, but the boys had had second chances and
ignored them, so I'm sure their little rear ends were stinging
and aching before I finished. I know they were all having good,
hard cries before they got up.
Dillon actually watched. He wasn't happy about it, but he was
paying attention, and he actually asked some questions later.
From what he was saying, while it's still hard on him to be
strict, I think he realizes that it does help the boys when he
has clear, consistent standards, and when he enforces them.
After they finished crying, we got everyone cleaned up and
bedtime went much more easily.
While Barrett didn't join us, Dillon and I stayed up with some
of my older boys for a while, and he and I took the time just to
talk about stuff - comics and movies and how his job is going.
When we retired to my bedroom, I jokingly chastised him about
being a naughty daddy and making me do all the spanking. I
undressed him, then put him over my lap for a playful spanking.
Both of us were hard after that, and we slept together again,
but this time we definitely did more than sleep.
#Post#: 9597--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: Jack Date: October 26, 2018, 5:30 am
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I have focused more on Dillon and the little boys lately, and I
thought Barrett deserved an update.
He's doing better than well. He and I spoke last night, and he
says he's very happy.
Ed and Drake are doing very well. I have said before that kids
don't really need spankings to do well, but they do need
consistency. Part of his agreement when he moved in with Dillon
and the boys was that Dillon would enforce discipline. I don't
think that's been easy for Dillon, and I know Barrett has had to
push things a few times, but it seems like Barrett has been
consistent with Dillon in getting him to be consistent with
Drake and Ed.
While Barrett is hardly ecstatic about his job (he knows comics
and games, but he's not 'into them' like some people are), but
he is happy with us. I pay well, try hard to work with people's
schedules, and there are a lot of people around Barrett's age
working there. More important, my managers try to rotate
schedules around and to respect people's needs and requests, so
that everyone has a chance to do what they need to do, get
hours, and still socialize a bit.
Barrett is happy to be in college and really have a chance to
finish. I know he's made some friends, and he's made a couple
of comments that suggest there may be a girl about whom he's
getting serious.
I haven't seen a lot of him since the college kids left, but he
did come by the other weekend, when the UT guys were home. He
was going to come over this afternoon to help decorate for the
Halloween parties, but he ended up scheduled to work. He is off
Sunday, however, and has promised to come over Sunday afternoon
to help supervise the little guys party.
#Post#: 9603--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: kalico Date: October 26, 2018, 11:25 am
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That’s great news and I hope everything keeps going good for
him....
Thanks for the update jack
Hugs kal
#Post#: 9972--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: squarecutter Date: November 13, 2018, 6:04 am
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Does Barrett have a consistent way of spanking his brothers,
hand/implement etc. Seems if he gets stressed he could come down
much harder than he needs as such a young 'parent'?
#Post#: 9979--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: Jack Date: November 13, 2018, 5:47 pm
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[quote author=squarecutter link=topic=371.msg9972#msg9972
date=1542110695]
Does Barrett have a consistent way of spanking his brothers,
hand/implement etc. Seems if he gets stressed he could come down
much harder than he needs as such a young 'parent'?
[/quote]
Barret wasn't exactly consistent, but he did seem to take things
into account like both the age of the boys and their prior
history. He is not, any longer, their primary disciplinarian.
Now that he and the boys are living down here with Dillon (his
step-father, their dad), he's making Dill do most of the actual
discipline. From what I've heard, while Dillon doesn't like
being strict, he's keeping to his agreement witih Barrett, and
trying to keep the boys inline - including when it calls for the
occasional sore bottom.
#Post#: 11118--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: Jack Date: January 13, 2019, 5:21 pm
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I should have said this a month ago (more or less).
Things seem to be going pretty well for Dillon and his family.
Gina ended up not being released from jail until nearly
Halloween, but she is out. The boys did get to see her at
Christmas, but they met at Dillon's parents' house. She ended
up taking them out shopping and to eat. Dillon said the boys
were happy to see her, but they seemed down after the visit, but
they wouldn't talk about why. It could be just that they were
tired, or bummed about mom leaving, but it could also be that
she was trash talking - it's hard to say.
Whatever the case, part of her plea bargain does require her to
get anger management therapy, and Dillon is still pushing for
her to get some 'real' therapy, and that they're not going to
get back together until after they've had couples therapy.
While she doesn't start her anger management training until this
month (might have already started it by now), she has been
attending AA.
On the other hand, Drake and Ed seem to be doing a lot better
with consistent rules and discipline, and their school grades
stayed much higher than they'd been for a while. Dillon saw
that and admitted that it's working. While it's hard for him -
both to be strict with them, and because of the extra work it
takes to keep on top of them - he admits it seems to be worth
it.
Barrett managed to drag out a 4.0 last semester, so he's
ecstatic about that, and he's finally seeing a light at the end
of the college tunnel, now that he's making better money and can
really work at it.
Dylan and Barrett both work for me, and I try to keep their
schedules flexible, but when Barrett's in school, I can't make
sure one of them is off every afternoon, so Ed and Drake are
still over here at least a couple of afternoons a week. From
what I can see, they're both doing really well. Not only are
they doing better in school, they both seem to be happy, and I
think their behavior's improved a lot as well.
#Post#: 11124--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: kalico Date: January 14, 2019, 12:36 am
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Thanks for the update and I’m happy that everything seems to be
going great for this little family and I hope everything works
for the best.....
Hugs kal
#Post#: 16953--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: Jack Date: January 18, 2020, 9:07 am
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Hard to believe it's been over a years since I've updated this.
There have been a lot of little changes, but they've added up.
The least changes are with Ed and Drake (now 9 and 12). Drake
is in 6th grade this year and Ed in fourth. It sounds like the
two of them settled down a lot after finally getting it through
their heads (or rears) that they would be consistently spanked
when they broke the rules. Dillon and Barrett both say both
boys are doing good at home and well at school, which is what
can be expected. I still see them pretty much on a weekly
basis.
Barrett is doing great. He's very happy, doing well at work,
and dating regularly. While I don't often have a chance to
visit with him, he is still friends with a lot of the boys, and
he was around a lot over Christmas. He's expecting to graduate
this spring, and he's tentatively decided to get his masters
before making any changes, though he has applied for some jobs.
The most has changed with Dillon. He and Gina are filing for
divorce. I think it really comes down to two or three things.
First, Dillon has always been a bit asexual - which isn't to say
he doesn't like sex, it's just not that much of a driving thing.
After some therapy, and he and I talking it out a few times,
he's decided he's actually bi-sexual, but he's really more
interested in the person than the gender. He's not making a big
deal out of that at the time, since he doesn't want Gina trying
to blow it up during the divorce proceedings.
The second problem is that Gina just isn't willing to work at
the relationship. I've spoken to her almost not at all since
all this started a couple of years ago now. Apparently she
blames me for 'enabling' Barrett, then Dillon. That's actually
part of the trouble - she blames everybody except herself. From
what I here, she's done her court-mandated anger management, and
she's staying with AA (has to while she's on probation), but
she's refused to do general therapy or couple's therapy. Dillon
is still seeing a therapist a couple of times a month, but he's
come to believe that, until Gina is willing to really work at
therapy, they'll just fall back into the same old patterns if
they get back together.
Don't get me wrong - I used to consider Gina a good friend, and
I don't want to lay all the blame on her. She has some
problems, and I think she needs to admit them and work on them,
but a lot of the problem is that Dillon just isn't able to be
assertive. Even with them this far from each other, it's hard
on him to keep doing what he knows he should. Of course, even
if he was more assertive, it might not work for them to get back
together. I do think he's right that one person working on a
two-person problem doesn't stand much chance of solving it.
All that leads up to Gina has filed for divorce, but I'll have
to come back later to discuss more.
#Post#: 16962--------------------------------------------------
Re: Barrett Rawlings (22), Drake (10) and Ed (7)
By: Zyngaru Date: January 18, 2020, 1:56 pm
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[quote author=Jack link=topic=371.msg16953#msg16953
date=1579360035]
First, Dillon has always been a bit asexual - which isn't to say
he doesn't like sex, it's just not that much of a driving thing.
After some therapy, and he and I talking it out a few times,
he's decided he's actually bi-sexual, but he's really more
interested in the person than the gender. He's not making a big
deal out of that at the time, since he doesn't want Gina trying
to blow it up during the divorce proceedings.
[/quote]
That's an interesting revelation. I discovered I was asexual
around 50 years of age. Before that, I was one confused puppy.
I just got my first computer and was just surfing around and
found AVEN, an asexual site, and the more I read the more I
understood that was me. Probably the greatest misunderstanding
about asexuality is that it does NOT mean the person doesn't
have a sex drive. Heck I think asexuals have the strongest sex
drives. Its the fact they don't have a focus for that drive.
Asexuals don't want to have sex, but their urges are tremendous.
Those urges can go either or both genders. Many asexuals force
themselves to have sex with someone to try and fit in. Anyway
it is a much misunderstood orientation.
It does sound like he might still be trying to figure himself
out though. Is he bisexual, because he is drawn to both genders?
Not necessarily. Like in your statement, asexuals are drawn to
the person. It's the inner person they come to like and even
love. It's not about the gender or the sex.
I've rantedenough. I was just interested, because you don't see
much posted about being asexual.
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