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       #Post#: 30331--------------------------------------------------
       Tommy - Thomas Brian Goodens Wells
       By: Jack Date: February 17, 2025, 1:18 pm
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       Tommy   2-Apr-89     m. Donald
       A (Biological Nephew)
       - Darnell (Donald's cousin - adopting - more to come soon)
       Not much to say here.  Tommy and I talk rarely on the phone, and
       I haven't seen him in person since before the pandemic.
       I can't really say why.  I think part of it was that I tried to
       allow him to maintain contact with his biological mother.  From
       things he's said, she lied so much and so contantly that he
       started to believe some of her lies.  Despite the fact that he
       was being abused by his mom and her boyfriend and molested by
       her boyfriend, he still seems to think that I was wrong to take
       him away from her and that I was abusive to him.  I finally just
       quit wasting my time on him.
       The sad part is, Caleb (Tommy's biological half-brother) knows
       how much BS that is, and it seems like he has less to do with
       Tommy than I do.
       the one thing I do konw is that Tommy and his husband have taken
       in a couple of other boys - young, gay teens in those two cases,
       and both of them are still at home, in high school.
       #Post#: 30351--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Tommy - Thomas Brian Goodens Wells
       By: db105 Date: February 19, 2025, 7:59 am
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       Those kind of situations are sad. Normally it's when parents
       divorce and one of the parents poisons the children's
       relationship with the other parent, but it can happen with other
       relationships, as here. I think what you are doing is the right
       thing to do. Give him space and maybe he'll come around at some
       point, or maybe he won't.
       #Post#: 30396--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Tommy - Thomas Brian Goodens Wells
       By: Zyngaru Date: February 22, 2025, 5:54 pm
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       Jack, you did what was right at the time.  You really can't let
       a boy stay in an abusive home and have contact with those that
       abused him, even if he can't understand why.  You were the adult
       in the situation.  Unfortunately, after the fact, the abusers
       get to tell tall tales and flip things around, so you become the
       bad guy.  It happens a lot.  Sorry.
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