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       #Post#: 30116--------------------------------------------------
       What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: Jack Date: January 11, 2025, 12:13 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       As I've said here recently, i've started reading spanky-lit
       again, and I'm discovering that I don't like stories where the
       spanker or spankings seem mean spirited.
       I was just reading some by a recommended author (who hasn't
       posted in four years), so I'm going to mention him in case you
       want to look for yourself, and hope he doesn't hear about this
       post.  If he does (or if anyone likes his stories), I'm going to
       point out that these are my opinions, and I'm expressing them to
       open a discussion, not because I think my way is the only proper
       way or because I want to insult an author who's writing style I
       like very much.
       I read one of Frank's stories that I really liked, so tried
       another.  I read part 3 of What Do You Mean? and the protagonist
       gets a hard, bare bottom paddling because he was supposed to
       'mow the lawn early' and he slept in an extra twenty or thirty
       minutes.  How can a decent parent justify spanking in that
       situation at all?  Now, maybe this one hits me hard because I
       was spanked in a similar situation, and I'm still angry about it
       50 years later.  Or maybe it's just lazy writing (either not
       making the situation clear or not being willing to bother to
       find a reasonable excuse), or maybe the author isn't intending
       this to be a WHASS  and wants the boy's punishments to be
       unfair.
       Then I tried another - the first story in The Twins.  The boys
       are staying with a neighbor who has never spanked them before,
       but who has watched them.  The boys are about to get a
       well-deserved spanking, but after spanking the smaller twin
       (fraternal, not identical), he expects the other boy, who just
       watched his brother receive a very hard spanking on his pajamas
       and briefs, to willingly come to him, gives that boy three
       smacks for not coming, then sits down and demands he comes
       again, then gives him three more smacks - bare this time, and
       demands he come to him again, then gives him the same ten smacks
       his brother got, except, when he covers his bottom and doesn't
       move his hands, he gets the second half bare.
       I can't see anyway that could be considered anything but mean,
       and it was enough that I don't want to read anymore of his
       stories.  Am I over reacting?  How do you feel about that kind
       of story?
       #Post#: 30117--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: David M. Katz Date: January 11, 2025, 3:56 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       As one who wrote unreasonable and OTT spankings in my first few
       stories because I thought that is what readers wanted because
       that is what I had read, I understand why these stories exist.
       I do not like them and have long since redeemed my ways.
       I will subvert an adage: "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
       I know there are some who enjoy this sort of thing and it is
       what they get off to. I rather they read it/write it than do it.
       So, there is a need for these stories.
       That said, I prefer more realistic type stories. I don't mind a
       harsh spanking but it needs to be justified by the "crime" and
       be age appropriate. I hate mean spankers.
       If there is abuse or a mean/hateful spanker then I want a
       comeuppance or retribution in the story. A loving/caring spanker
       can make a harsh spanking easier to handle.
       I don't like them and won't read them for pleasure.
       I am sometimes in a position where I have to read them but I
       won't seek them out for my personal enjoyment.
       I am with you, Jack.
       #Post#: 30118--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: Zyngaru Date: January 11, 2025, 7:17 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I am with both Jack and DMK.
       There are mean spirited people in the world.  You see them all
       the time on the job.  They are the people that look for ways to
       make co-workers look bad in front of their boss.
       So, I can see this showing up in stories.  It is realistic, even
       if it's not fair.  But then I was taught that life isn't fair.
       I also believe there is a difference between a mean-spirited
       person and just a plain ordinary mean person.  The stereotype of
       the old hag down the street that fusses at kids.  Or the grumpy
       old man.  Just normal mean people.  But mean-spirited are the
       ones that stick knives in the backs of their children.  They
       take pleasure out of leaving welts on their kids.  Some
       implements will leave welts, but to take pleasure in doing it
       just for your own enjoyment is mean-spirited and could also be
       just mean, if you do it all the time.  Kids at school that
       spread rumors about other kids, again mean spirited.  They find
       out that Billy still wets his bed at 12 years old.  Do they keep
       his confidence?  No, they spread the rumor until the whole
       school knows Billy's secret.
       I dn;t like mean spirited people and I for sure don't want to
       read about them.  UNLESS like DMK said, they get it in the end.
       My problem I wouldn't have kept reading to the end to find out
       they got what was coming to them.
       #Post#: 30119--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: afinch Date: January 11, 2025, 11:04 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I'm with the rest of you.  And I don't care if they get their
       comeuppance in the end, because that doesn't undo the damage
       they've caused.
       Similarly, there is a SS site mostly known for photos and
       videos.  I have zero interest in seeing photos of people whipped
       or caned to bleeding or paddled to massive bruising.  That has
       nothing to do with "spanking"--it's abuse.
       #Post#: 30120--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: Jack Date: January 12, 2025, 12:48 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=David M. Katz link=topic=3362.msg30117#msg30117
       date=1736632574]
       That said, I prefer more realistic type stories. I don't mind a
       harsh spanking but it needs to be justified by the "crime" and
       be age appropriate. I hate mean spankers.
       [/quote]
       There are plenty of stories with harsh spankings, but with good
       reasons for them.
       Davram Quinn's Care and Handling series
       Finn  Kelly's A Different Approach
       Of course one of the problems is, it's hard to tell how harsh a
       spanking is based simply on what  you're reading.  Two people
       can give hand swats, yet one barely pinkens the skin while
       another leaves a bruise.  That's why, to me, it's more about how
       the spankee is treated.
       #Post#: 30121--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: Plagosus Date: January 12, 2025, 5:35 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       An author may provide a reason for the punishment perhaps
       because he feels a reason is needed in a spanking story and then
       go on to describe a harsh spanking. The spanking may come over
       as mean-spirited if the reason is trivial and merited if the
       reason was serious.
       I am not too concerned about why a boy is spanked. In some of my
       stories no reason is given. The focus of my stories tends to be
       on "spankiness" and very often the situations I create are
       highly implausible but not impossible. I have now and again
       written about mean-spirited spankers, but the fact they are
       mean-spirited is made clear other than by hard how they spank or
       what for.
       In the end, whatever we write, are we not all exploring our
       obsession with spanking?
       #Post#: 30124--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: Jack Date: January 12, 2025, 10:45 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Plagosus link=topic=3362.msg30121#msg30121
       date=1736724953]
       In the end, whatever we write, are we not all exploring our
       obsession with spanking?
       [/quote]
       You are absotively, posilutely, 100% correct.  That's what a lot
       of my reason posts have been about.  I'm trying to explore my
       own interests and define what I like and what I don't like.  I
       enjoy posting these things as threads, both because I honestly
       want to see what other people think, but also because my own
       thinking becomes more clear when I put it in writing.
       #Post#: 30176--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: squarecutter Date: January 25, 2025, 6:06 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I find it harder to watch or read anything now when I see no
       empathy or understanding and cannot like any of the characters
       involved. Can I mention Stephen Seagall? movies?  As such
       stories spankings without context or a basis in the narrative
       would leave me cold.  Even abusive spankings if you sympathise
       with the victim would give me somewhere to go. Heretically
       perhaps I prefer good stories with spankings, not the other way
       around
       #Post#: 30177--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: Jack Date: January 25, 2025, 9:04 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=squarecutter link=topic=3362.msg30176#msg30176
       date=1737806796]
       Heretically perhaps I prefer good stories with spankings, not
       the other way around
       [/quote]
       That was my intention with my Central Point High School series.
       It was created to be stories about realistic characters who
       lived rich, detailed life, and some of them happened to be
       spankos, while others happened to be disciplined using corporal
       punishment.
       #Post#: 30225--------------------------------------------------
       Re: What is 'mean spirited'?
       By: HumbledBareBoy Date: February 2, 2025, 4:19 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Jack link=topic=3362.msg30116#msg30116
       date=1736619224]As I've said here recently, i've started reading
       spanky-lit again, and I'm discovering that I don't like stories
       where the spanker or spankings seem mean spirited. <-snip-> I
       can't see anyway that could be considered anything but mean, and
       it was enough that I don't want to read anymore of his stories.
       Am I over reacting?  How do you feel about that kind of
       story?[/quote]
       First of all, I think a key point is what Plagosus said
       regarding the "justification" and/or "reason" question: "An
       author may provide a reason for the punishment perhaps because
       he feels a reason is needed in a spanking story and then go on
       to describe a harsh spanking. The spanking may come over as
       mean-spirited if the reason is trivial and merited if the reason
       was serious." [emoji106] Jack, you and I have discussed this
       both in group chat and privately over email, but in general I
       take the YKINMK philosophy and believe that "it takes all
       kinds," in general. Are you "overreacting," you ask? My answer
       would be "NO", though I tend to believe that just about nobody
       is ever truly "over-reacting" to this or that; instead, they are
       simply "reacting," according to the stimulus and the feelings it
       brings up from within them. More humorously, I would say that
       how I personally feel tends to be a matter of how hot and
       arousing the story is, or to what extent does it make me want to
       operate my laptop with only one hand?! [emoji38]
       [quote author=David M. Katz link=topic=3362.msg30117#msg30117
       date=1736632574]That said, I prefer more realistic type stories.
       I don't mind a harsh spanking but it needs to be justified by
       the "crime" and be age appropriate. I hate mean spankers. If
       there is abuse or a mean/hateful spanker then I want a
       comeuppance or retribution in the story. A loving/caring spanker
       can make a harsh spanking easier to handle.[/quote]
       I think this is a major preferential and philosophical
       difference between you and myself? Especially since you have
       used the "suspending reality" phrase, with respect to some of my
       own stories, from your own "reviewer" perspective... [emoji4]
       ...so I was extra-flattered, and my heart warmed, when you
       shared kind words about the emotional aspects of some of my
       stories. I do believe you and I are quite different, most
       notably in these two ways:
       [list type=upper-alpha]
       [li]I'm more inclined to priortize "hotness" over other such
       ideals, such as "realism" and "fairness." In my case, bear in
       mind, the "hotness" term is roughly synonymous with
       [emoji533][emoji97] potential... [emoji40][/li]
       [li]Although I have my preferences around emotions and overall
       tone, I can easily overlook injustice and mean-spiritedness, so
       long as it serves the purpose of [emoji91] [emoji91] [emoji91]
       content to indulge my baser instincts.[/li]
       [/list]
       [quote author=Plagosus link=topic=3362.msg30121#msg30121
       date=1736724953]I am not too concerned about why a boy is
       spanked. In some of my stories no reason is given. The focus of
       my stories tends to be on "spankiness" and very often the
       situations I create are highly implausible but not impossible. I
       have now and again written about mean-spirited spankers, but the
       fact they are mean-spirited is made clear other than by hard how
       they spank or what for.[/quote]
       Needless to say, I tend to resonate with this outlook -- with
       respect to not only "spankiness," but also arousal and eroticism
       -- regardless of whether the "spirit" is mean or wholesome.
       [quote author=Jack link=topic=3362.msg30124#msg30124
       date=1736743512]
       [quote author=Plagosus link=topic=3362.msg30121#msg30121
       date=1736724953]In the end, whatever we write, are we not all
       exploring our obsession with spanking?[/quote]
       I'm trying to explore my own interests and define what I like
       and what I don't like.  I enjoy posting these things as threads,
       both because I honestly want to see what other people think, but
       also because my own thinking becomes more clear when I put it in
       writing.
       [/quote]
       Yeah, I agree, these are indeed fruitful and engaging
       discussions! [emoji817] Although, it's kind of ironic though,
       that when I shared that one story link to you and Z. -- as my
       idea of a "mean-spirited" story, that is -- you yourselves
       actually felt differently. On account of the boy's naughty
       behavior, specifically, so from what I recall, it appeared not
       to activate your "mean" and/or "unfair" sensors like it did for
       me(?) Whereas for both myself and another fellow author, she and
       I shared a perception of the parents as unloving and even
       somewhat sadistic; though I actually enjoyed that aspect, being
       somewhat sadomasochistic myself, haha! [emoji12]
       We humans really are such peculiar folk, aren't we? [emoji38]
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