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#Post#: 2665--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: Jack Date: December 31, 2017, 1:32 pm
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[quote author=db105 link=topic=233.msg2614#msg2614
date=1514544722]
Just out of curiosity, what's going on with Clayton? Why are you
fed up with him?
[/quote]
Clayton isn't doing anything wrong, but he's not doing a lot....
I don't want to say he's not doing right. He attends school and
is keeping a GPA above 3.5 with only one exception. He's taking
at least 13 hours a semester. He works (at the stores). What
bothers me is that he doesn't act like part of the family - he
doesn't contribute. He will run errands or drop someone off if
I ask, but he never really volunteers. He's not paying for any
of his bills (which I don't ask, but then the other boys who
have lived there have been very active in the family and helped
in other ways). What he does do is spend a lot of time playing
games on his very nice system.
It's not like he's a hermit, he is friends with some of the kids
from work, and he has them over. He eats over here most of the
time, unless he's working late. Sometimes he will do stuff with
us or help the younger kids with something. However, after 3.5
years in college, he still hasn't chosen a major, and he just
doesn't seem motivated.
Now I encourage the kids to take 5 years and explore things, but
Clayton just feels like he's stretching things out. I have
talked to him several times about getting more involved in
something and needing to make some decisions, but he seems happy
with the status quo. I think having to live with someone else
and help pay the bills would go a long way towards helping him
make some adjustments.
[hr]
I had actually come here to post this information before I
forgot it.
Kaden was able to see his father Friday.
I have to say I was torn. On the one hand, he wanted to come up
here Thursday, but Kaden explained he really wanted to go to
Kenny's birthday party, so his dad delayed until Friday. He
didn't make a lot of plans, and he did explain to Kade that he
didn't have much money. Still, he got him a pack of Under
Armour socks (which are very bright, and fairly popular these
days), and took him to see Thor: Ragnarok, and they got burgers
before. Afterwords, despite getting kind of chilly, they spent
a little time just messing around together, before he had to
leave.
I did have a few things to say to him - mainly that, as far as I
was concerned, he should have stepped in and straightened things
out between Kaden and his wife when the problem happened (to an
extent, he did - but he only dealt with the immediate issue, and
never noticed Kaden's fear and dislike of the woman). I also
pointed out that, right now, I am Kaden's only legal guardian,
and, as he himself has admitted, he isn't ready to take Kaden
now, and that if Kaden doesn't want to come later, I'm willing
to keep it tied up in court for the next three and a half years
or so.
I think he might have been a bit hurt by my low opinion of him,
but also glad that I was ready to put Kaden's needs first.
However, because of Hurricane Harvey, he's not in a good spot
right now, so I'm not going to demand he drop everything and
start giving more attention to Kaden. I did make it very clear
that I don't need his child support money, and he should take
care of this current situation before worrying about it, though
him visiting Kaden on a regular basis would be good.
Kaden knows it's probably going to be about another week,
probably two, before he can see his mom, but I think he's in a
much better place than he's been. he certainly seems to be a
bit more relaxed --- even if I did have to give him a couple of
swats over chores this morning.
#Post#: 2668--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: db105 Date: December 31, 2017, 3:59 pm
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Glad to hear that he finally saw his father and will soon see
his mother. I feel bad for his father, because not having money
to deal with his son's needs must suck, but I'm willing to
accept your judgment if you feel he could have acted better,
since you obviously are much closer to the situation. At least
he is taking an interest.
#Post#: 2670--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: Jack Date: December 31, 2017, 4:52 pm
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I hope I did this correctly.
[quote author=db105 link=topic=233.msg2668#msg2668
date=1514757596]
Glad to hear that he finally saw his father and will soon see
his mother. I feel bad for his father, because not having money
to deal with his son's needs must suck, but I'm willing to
accept your judgment if you feel he could have acted better,
since you obviously are much closer to the situation. At least
he is taking an interest.
[/quote]
What I'm referring to is NOT the current money situation. Look
back at this post
HTML https://jackshouse.createaforum.com/biographies/kaden-connelly/msg2308/#msg2308
To me, this is where Mr. C let a problem grow between him and
Kaden, and this must have been about four or four and a half
years ago. If he'd moved then to fix it, I think they'd be in a
totally different situation. He's not totally in the wrong, but
I can totally understand how Kaden wouldn't have wanted to see
his father's wife again, and Mr. Connelly just let that go.
Maybe I'm wrong, and he did try, but couldn't sove it, but
that's the issue to which I now refer.
#Post#: 2688--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: Jack Date: January 1, 2018, 3:40 pm
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It's cold as heck here today, so no one wants to go out.
I made some private time with Kaden, and we went through all
the stuff we'd picked up from his house. I had picked up enough
stuff to get him by day to day, when we weren't able to access
the house. Then we picked up his stuff, which gave him more
variety. Some of the stuff he had wasn't in great shape or
didn't seem to fit him, so today we did laundry, then sorted it
all. We're going to go shopping tomorrow and get him stuff he
needs - a bit more underwear, a bit more cold weather stuff, and
stuff to start basketball.
I've asked everyone else, but no one seems to have grown that
much since we bought the cold weather stuff and even shorts
aren't too far gone, so I think it'll just be me and Kade.
#Post#: 2722--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: kalico Date: January 2, 2018, 1:06 pm
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Enjoy your little shopping trip with just the two of you....I
know those times are few and far between
Hugs kal
#Post#: 2814--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: Jack Date: January 6, 2018, 5:07 pm
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I took Kaden to see his Mom this afternoon. She's in Dallas.
She's actually been here a few days, but the doctors wanted her
to get settled in, then have a chance to review her files before
letting her have visitors.
I was going to stay in the waiting area and let Kaden visit
(they only gave us an hour today), but they both really wanted
me to meet her, so I went in for about twenty minutes.
First of all, she's not stupid. I can't say much else, because
she's obviously not in a great place right now. On the other
hand, just seeing Kaden and knowing he's okay seemed to help.
She does know that he's not going to be moving back in with her
next week. She's okay with that (seems to be, I guess I should
say). She knows she screwed up, and she knows she's not in a
good place right now, and it's pretty obvious he's happy right
now (especially since he found out she was - more or less - all
right).
I guess it must be kind of bittersweet for her, because he
wasn't trying to hide the fact that he's happy and doing well -
he was even happy when he 'complained' how strict I am and that
I've 'had to' bust his butt a couple of times. I did tell her
about Parker, and suggested she could meet his mom one day, but
mostly I let her know that they're both fine and happy and see
each other on a regular basis, and I think that, more than
anything, helped reassure her.
I feel kind of bad, because i keep spending one on one time with
Kaden, but I think most of the boys understand that he just
needs it right now. On the other hand, I think especially Devon
and Liam have some special attention coming soon.
#Post#: 2821--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: db105 Date: January 6, 2018, 9:39 pm
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His mother being found alive was a relief, and seeing her
getting treatment must be very good for Kaden. She should count
her blessings that Kaden is being cared for and concentrate on
getting well as soon as possible.
#Post#: 2832--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: kalico Date: January 7, 2018, 11:54 am
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That's great that y'all got to meet and everything seems to be
going good for all involved and hope she does well on her
recovery and get to a good place where she can start being his
mom.... it's good that she could talk to Parkers mom....
Hugs kal
#Post#: 3102--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: Jack Date: January 21, 2018, 5:52 pm
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I haven't been able to go with him the last couple of weeks, but
Kaden has been able to visit his mom for a little while the past
two Saturdays. At this point, it sounds like she's going to be
held for 90 days for observation and treatment. The problem is,
she's still facing a charge over leaving Kaden alone for an
extended time. A lot of that depends on the judge and the
doctors, as well as what the DA wants to do.
I'm willing to get my lawyer to look into the issue if needed.
There's not much question what actually happened, though, but
getting my lawyer to handle it could get things ahead of the DA,
rather than having to wait until after charges are files before
we even get someone on the case.
I have spoken to Kaden's Dad, and he wants them to do something
over spring break, which is the next time he'll have a real
chance to visit. I've talked a bit about a couple of things,
but I think staying home and quiet is more likely, so that'll
probably work out. He's still trying to answer some questions
and solve some details, so I don't think Kaden and I are going
to worry about him doing anything for a while anyway.
#Post#: 3117--------------------------------------------------
Re: Kaden Connelly
By: kalico Date: January 22, 2018, 10:08 am
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That's good that things seen to be going good and he is seeing
both parents...
Thanks for the update
Hugs kal
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