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#Post#: 15959--------------------------------------------------
Re: Fall Classes
By: Jack Date: November 16, 2019, 7:05 am
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I was not deliberating ignoring Zyngaru's question. Rather, I
had seen it, intended to post a detailed answer, then completely
forgot about it.
While I'm not sure I'll have time to do a detailed answer right
now, I didn't want to risk forgetting it again, so....
The short version is everything is going well.
We've basically been running it as a book club - actually as
two. It was a bit hard at first, but as the older kids grew to
know each other (and to be fair, a lot of them already knew each
other at least somewhat, from field trips or PE activity things
their families had done together), I was able start leaving the
older kids on their own more. A lot of it was really more about
them getting an idea of what I had in mind. My first few weeks
required me asking a lot of questions and driving the
conversations myself.
Not every kid (remember, there are two girls with us - both in
the older group) wants to talk about every book, and a few of
the kids are pretty quiet, but most of them seem to enjoy
talking about the books they like (and, as you might guess - the
problem with a couple of the kids is shutting them up).
We are down to 23 kids. Three of them were pulled because the
schedule just didn't work for them, one of them just wasn't
doing well in the situation (a kid who I think had some
emotional problems and I don't mind if the atmosphere gets a
little rambunctious at times, which didn't work for him), and
one whose mom decided she couldn't handle all my book choices
after all.
I have had to have a meeting with some of the parents when I
turned to some of the books with alternate mythologies. I had
come up with an idea that seemed to work. In the first place,
my standing argument has always been that fantasy books today
are just a modern form of mythology. Over the years, I've
firmed that up a bit to add that using 'mythological entities'
allows authors to explore ideas without offending anyone's
specific religious beliefs. My newer idea (which seemed pretty
well received in this bunch, at least) is that using
'mythological entities' also allows them to deal with modern
situations, such as people who are good people, but don't
worship the way you do, without having to cast a modern religion
in an offensive way, as well as by helping people look at issues
in a different way by eliminating preconceived notions (and
since these homeschoolers often feel oppressed, I might have
tilted the way I presented that argument just a bit).
We had our first meeting in early September, and we've been
meeting twice a week since then, except Halloween, when I had to
cancel because I was sick. We have finished 6 books, and have
also read a couple of short stories - Hatchet, My Side of the
Mountain, Rangers Apprentice: Ruins of Gorlan, Tarzan the
Ape-Man, and Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief. The sixth
one was The short stories were One Night in Horrorland, which we
read leading up to Halloween (while I had to cancel, they did
meet at the store for the snacks and TV version that I'd
promised them on that day). The short stories we read were The
Ransom of Red Chief by O. Henry (every kid there laughed aloud,
but also agreed that Johnny needed a good spanking, which was an
interesting discussion to hear) and The Adventure of the Dancing
Men by Conan Doyle.
We've had four meetings since Halloween. The first was spent
discussing horror in movies and literature. Since then, we've
been reading/discussing the Pawn of Prophecy. That series deals
much more with religion than many, so we spent a day discussing
it before we started reading. That almost didn't happen,
because the book is basically out of print now (the novels
weren't very long, and the five books are now mostly available
as two books collecting the original five, but at a $15 price
tag, so I pretty much took a loss so the kids could read them).
I'm planning on dragging this one out a bit to last through next
week, since we're not meeting the week of Thanksgiving. I am
going to make sure I have a short story on stand just in case -
probably Rikki Tikki Tavi.
The reason it took me a while to answer is not what's been
shared above though.
Let me start with Dwayne, who's 16 (and dyslexic). He was a
bump on a log at first, but he was apparently listening, and as
he realized the other boys were getting the same things from the
stories as he was, he started being more willing to talk. I've
actually had spent some private time to the point that he's been
over here a couple of times, and I finally got his parents to
allow me to try something different with him. He's been using
Audible to get the books when available, and reading along with
them. I had to work with him to get him to really try it, and
his dad informs me that they have to watch to make sure he
actually does read along, but it seems to be really helping him.
I stopped at Sonic the second time he came home with me. Let me
say that Dwayne is an okay looking kid - kind of light
brown/dark blond hair, fair skin, blue eyes, a bit of acne, and
braces. A medium build - maybe 5'10", and lean, but not
especially skinny or athletic - just kind of average really.
Nice kid though and fairly polite. One of the other kids in our
group had been a bit of trouble that day, and I used that to
mention paddling kids when I'd been teaching. Dwayne went SO
RED!
His mom is the teacher, and it turns out that she handles most
of the discipline - usually with extra chores or homework,
sometimes with restrictions. He doesn't remember the last time
she spanked him, but maybe when he was around 10 or 11. Every
once in a while, though, instead of sent to the principal, he
gets 'referred to Dad'. "Dad uses a belt instead of a paddle,
though."
No more details, but it was still a cute conversation, since I
didn't have to pry for many details.
As I said, I don't mind the atmosphere getting occasionally
rambunctious, when it's because the kids are excited (as opposed
to deliberately disruptive). From time to time, I have had to
settle them down, and some of them are more prone to having to
be called down than others. If things get too bad, I've
occasionally asked someone to step out into the hall with me for
a short talk.
Now, I had one talk with a parent early on that led to some
trouble. I just wanted suggestions from her on how best to
handle her kid and help direct him, but (based on his reactions
at the next meeting), she must have come down on him like a ton
of bricks. I don't want kids who are cowed and afraid to
participate (or even those who feel like they have to be there,
whether they want to be or not). I'm trying to run this as
something to help kids find the joy in reading. Since then, I
tried to talk to all the parents about tips to re-direct their
kids if I needed (harder to remember specifics that way, but
better than stirring up trouble).
The other thing I've done is, if there's a situation where a boy
won't be subtly re-directed, I ask him to step out in the hall
with me for a moment. Now, while I don't have permission to
paddle or spank any of these kids (besides off-handed comments
from a couple of the parents, which I'm not taking seriously),
they know I'm still in charge, and I'd imagine most of them have
been warned about acting up before their parents started leaving
them here.
Usually, once a get a kid in the hall, it makes them realize
they've gone over the line. While that was the point, I usually
push it a bit. Some of the boys try to stay vague, but it's
pretty obvious that most of them at least still worry about
getting spanked, and three of them have very specifically
admitted it. However, the most fun was Hudson.
Hudson is my youngest student, and he won't be 9 until next fall
(he's come over a couple of times, and he gets along with Curtis
and my younger grands). He's smart and a very good reader, but
that doesn't make him any more mature than other boys his age
(maybe a bit less in some ways). I really like Hudson, but I've
had to take him out in the hall several times. The third time
was just a couple of days before Zyngaru asked about an update,
and is the main reason I put it off.
Hudson had previously admitted that he does get spanked, but
this time I pushed a bit more, reminding him that I'd already
asked if I needed to have a talk with his mom. This time he was
obviously a bit worried, and I think he might have been going
for sympathy. I said something like 'I know you said you'd
probably get spanked if I had to talk with your mom, Hudson, but
I'm not sure what else to do, if I need to keep bringing you out
here to talk to you."
"I'm sorry," he said, trying to look miserable.
"I'm sure you are, but maybe your mom's spankings aren't that
bad, if the idea of me talking to her isn't making an impression
on you."
Let me pause to say I know Hudson wears briefs - super hero ones
both times I've seen them. He's about the same height as
Curtis, but maybe slightly skinnier, so maybe 5'3" and 52 lbs.
He has dark blond hair, brown eyes, a Caucasian skin tone that
looks lightly tanned, and a mischievous little smile.
He very definitely didn't like the idea that I didn't take his
mom's spankings seriously (or that I might mention to her that
he needed one). He rushed to mention that both his parents
spank hard - bare bottom, but Mom's were worse, because she uses
this 'clear ruler', which I'm guessing to be an acrylic one,
which I can only must sting his little bottom like crazy.
Well, he shaped up after that, and I haven't complained to his
mom yet. On the other hand, the reason I'm sure he wears super
hero briefs is that he's actually spending the night with us.
While I do have the grands here, this weekend, Thanksgiving is
going to be crazy in a couple of ways, so I let the younger kids
(the ones who need more supervision and are unlikely to get to
do things on their own - mostly Connor and Curtis) have a couple
of friends over as well, and Hudson was among those invited.
#Post#: 15960--------------------------------------------------
Re: Fall Classes
By: Zyngaru Date: November 16, 2019, 8:33 am
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Thanks for the update. It was very interesting.
I had never thought of using the "Modern Mythology" angle to get
past peoples objections to certain books and movies, because of
their religious beliefs. That is actually a great way to
approach the whole, love C.S Lewis and despise J.K. Rowling,
people.
Does Dwayne use the cut out cardboard method to help with his
reading? Dyslexia runs in my family. Most of us have it to
some extent. Mine is mild. I just reverse letters and numbers
occasionally. One of my Nephews has it really bad. He is now
a Director of a Special Needs Organization. When he was in
elementary school, he had a teacher that recognized his problem
with reading. She took an index card and cut a small
rectangular hole in it. She taught him to use that to read, by
sliding the cut out down the page one word at a time. It helped
him tremendously. As time went on, that cut out got bigger and
bigger so he could read entire sentences at the same time.
Eventually he didn't need to use the index card anymore. By
using it, he trained his eyes to just look at one word at a time
instead of the whole sentence, thus eliminating mixing all the
words together.
For those who can't visualize dyslexia, think of Percy Jackson,
seeing and reading Ancient Greek instead of English at the
Museum or Peter Pan, seeing and being able to read the Fairy
Language at the secret entrance to Fairy land. There minds
rearranged the letters for them.
It is interesting that many of the kids in your reading club do
experience or have experienced spanking at home. That's what I
would have expected from Home Schooling parents though, at least
the ones who would desire a reading club for their children.
Once boys from your reading club begin coming to your house
socially and especially if they are spending the night, does
that change your spanking rules? Do they now become spanking
eligible? I am thinking about Hudson with this question. As
part of the Reading Club, he wouldn't be spanking eligible, but
once he begins coming over to be with Curtis and Connor,
socially, does that or will that eligibility change? Because
one can only expect that the boys are gong to get excited and
rambunctious.
#Post#: 15961--------------------------------------------------
Re: Fall Classes
By: Jack Date: November 16, 2019, 8:58 am
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I don't know a lot about how Dwayne used to deal with it, or how
he was trained. I do know that he tends to use a straight edge
- often an index card or book mark - to mark each line and help
him keep his place.
As I've said before, estimates seem to range that 70 to 80% of
parents still think spanking is acceptable in at least some
circumstances. Bransom is definitely one of the places that
keep that estimate up, and yes - I would expect homeschoolers,
especially those choosing to do it for religious reasons - to be
more likely to spank.
I don't really have spanking rules, except as a lose 'rule of
thumb', I suppose. In this case, because I don't know Hudson's
family well, and haven't interacted with him in another
situation (like school) where discipline was an issue, I
probably wouldn't spank him. If he gets in trouble this
morning, I'd be most likely to call his parents. As recent as
10 years ago, I might have given him the choice, but between
things that have been in the news over the last decade and the
fact that he's only 8, I wouldn't do it anymore.
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