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#Post#: 14498--------------------------------------------------
Spanking and Privacy
By: Kat Date: August 16, 2019, 5:25 pm
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I grew up during an era when few parents hesitated to announce
that a child was to receive a spanking, to openly discuss a
child's recent spanking, or even to administer a spanking in
front of strangers in a public place. In large families such as
mine, it was nearly impossible to have privacy, even if a
spanking occurred at home.
How much privacy does a child deserve?
My own feeling is that parents should be discreet about
discipline. The older the child, the more humiliating it is for
him to experience public chastisement or to have adults discuss
his discipline in front of him. On the other hand, some children
love to push boundaries in front of an audience. Does public
disrespect for a parent/authority figure deserve public
correction? Also, is it ever okay to require disrobing in a
private or semi-private place? (I'd consider a public restroom
to be semi-private.)
Kat
#Post#: 14506--------------------------------------------------
Re: Spanking and Privacy
By: Zyngaru Date: August 16, 2019, 9:57 pm
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I don't want to get too deep into this subject, when it comes to
my personal upbringing. Suffice it to say there is a huge gulf
between how I was raised and how I believe children should be
raised. Privacy was non-existent when I was a boy for me and my
brothers.
As for how I believe discipline should be handled. As much as
possible I believe that punishment should be done in private.
What's done in private should be corrected in private. Boys who
act together, I am okay with them being punished together and in
most cases I believe it should be done together, but of course
there would be a few cases that even then, it could be best done
privately from each other. The same goes with public
misbehaving. I believe that mischief and disrespect done
publicly should be punished publicly. The problem is, our
society doesn't agree with what I believe. So even that would
have to be taken care of privately, in most cases. There could
possibly be a few situations where it could be done publicly if
those present were of like beliefs.
This goes totally against my kink. My kink being humiliation
and embarrassment. Whether my own boyhood punishments molded my
kink, I don't know, I hated embarrassing situations as a boy,
but dreamed about them incessantly. So that makes for great
stories, but not very good for real life situations.
I would try my best to not embarrass a boy publicly, whom I
punish. That doesn't mean he wouldn't be spanked naked, because
he would, but it would just be the two of us, no audience,
unless a witness was required. I have acted as a witness to
both, boys being spanked bare and boys being strip searched. It
was done privately, with only those present that were needed to
be present.
#Post#: 14512--------------------------------------------------
Re: Spanking and Privacy
By: Jack Date: August 17, 2019, 7:54 am
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Allow me to start my reply with my thoughts on respect.
I think respect is like a bank account. When you first meet
someone, they've opened an account with you. Everyone should
start out with something in their account. Some people, like
teachers or police, start with more than others. People make
deposits in their accounts by earning the respect you've given
them - being polite, good at their jobs, whatever. People make
withdrawals from those accounts by being bad at their jobs or
not treating you well.
I try to give my kids respect, privacy, and dignity, but there
are times when just saying 'Am I going to have to wear you out?'
or "You're getting a whupping when we get home," might be your
only options to let them know they've gone too far. Hopefully
it shouldn't come to that too often, since a parent who's doing
a good job will have a kid who knows the rules and knows when
they're pushing too far.
The way my home is laid out, and as large as my family is, it's
almost impossible to keep spankings private. If we go to my
office, anyone in the area can see us going in there, and
there's not much question about what's going to happen. Going
to my bedroom might offer a few more options about what's about
to happen, but not many. And while my house is large and built
to provide some quiet, it's not soundproof. If I went into
someone's room, there could be a lot of reasons I'm going in
there, but if I'm giving a spanking, it's likely that there will
be something to overhear. In other words, complete privacy just
isn't possible.
On the other hand, in the past, I've used switchings a a public
event; not just to stress how unacceptable their behavior was to
the boy(s) in question, but to remind everyone else of the cost
of illegal behavior. Looking back, I'm just not sure if that
was a good idea or how fair it was to the boys who got in that
kind of trouble.
I guess that my answer to your ultimate question is that a kid
deserves as much privacy as it's possible for you to give him,
but also that it's sometimes not possible to give him a lot, and
that it is possible for him to give away some or all of that by
his own actions.
Groups of kids are a different situation, and my basic feeling
is that if they get in trouble together, they can accept their
punishment together.
#Post#: 14517--------------------------------------------------
Re: Spanking and Privacy
By: Zyngaru Date: August 17, 2019, 11:11 am
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I took the privacy as "Not in view", NOT, "Not heard" or "Not
Known about."
It would be almost impossible to give a spanking in a household
with other children, and they not know someone was getting
spanked. Same with being at school. You were sent to the
office or sent out in the hall. The other kids know what is
probably about to happen, they just don't see it.
I understand Privacy in this context of "Not on display."
Example: Teacher giving swats in the front of the class. As was
done when I was in Elementary School. Very public, no privacy.
Principal giving swats in his/her office. Private, but most of
the school knows why you went in there and what you are going to
get.
At home. Getting spanked in the family room while everyone is
watching Spiderman. No privacy.
Sent to your room to be spanked, while Spiderman is put on pause
and the rest of family waits for you to return. Private, but
known by everyone.
I believe that there should be as much privacy as can be
afforded. That includes that Spankings at home, stay at home,
and no talking about your siblings spanking to your friends or
his. If you want to talk about your own spankings, that is
fair, but not other peoples spankings.
I love this topic, because when you begin thinking about it,
there are so many nuances to it, that there could never be a set
rule. You can have a general policy, but with all of the
scenarios that could and often do happen, there just can't be a
set, carved in stone, "This is how I do it all the time" rule.
#Post#: 14518--------------------------------------------------
Re: Spanking and Privacy
By: Kat Date: August 17, 2019, 11:32 am
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While the topic is specific to spanking, I think non-corporal
punishment/discipline should also be private to the extent it's
possible. I've seen people say very harsh things to children in
public, yell at them, etc. I'm not sure such behavior isn't just
as humiliating and damaging as a smack in public.
Kat
#Post#: 14520--------------------------------------------------
Re: Spanking and Privacy
By: afinch Date: August 17, 2019, 8:07 pm
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I'm sure being yelled at in public is every bit as humiliating
as being smacked (and I suspect, at least today), anything
beyond a smack or two on a clothed bottom would be quickly
stopped by someone, be it bystanders, store security, or
police). Sometimes, though, kids insist on pushing just past
your very last nerve and pulling them up short can't always wait
for a "discreet time". Usually a discreet furious whisper about
what was going to happen later worked well for me as a kid, and
later as a parent. In both cases, it was humiliating wondering
whether anybody else heard/saw.
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