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#Post#: 13166--------------------------------------------------
Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: Jack Date: June 2, 2019, 11:33 am
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Let's start with a reminder of the spanking I gave the Loomis
twins after school on the Friday before last. The story was
shared as a BOTD here -
HTML https://jackshouse.createaforum.com/botd/27-may-2019-dropped-in-your-lap-a-jack-production/
The other report comes from a full week later (but earlier in
the day). You might remember Bridgette Henderson's oldest son,
Kelly. He's in class with Kenny and Ryan Tucker, just finishing
8th grade. He's 14, maybe 5'6" or 7", but only about 115 or 120
pounds. I'll also remind you that he's a ginger (not quite an
actual red' like Ryan, but close) with green eyes.
Long story short, I'd caught Kelly coming back to go see if a
local friend was home. He hadn't told anyone or checked out. I
was chewing him out (mildly - mostly just reminding him of the
rules) and let him know that it was a spanking offense. I
probably wouldn't have gone even that far, except we'd just gone
over the rules over the previous weekend, so I kind of felt this
was more about testing the limits. Well, instead of nodding his
head and apologizing, he started complaining that I wasn't his
dad and neither was PJ, and he didn't have to mind me.
Now, I probably should have seen that there was some emotional
build up there because of the 'PJ' comment, and I kind of did,
but he and his little brothers are going to be here most of the
summer, so I needed to nip that 'don't have to mind' nonsense in
the bud. I reminded him that his mother had given me very
specific permission to spank him, but he claimed that was in the
past and didn't apply anymore. At that point, I felt like the
lines were drawn, so we called his mom.
Yeah, she read him the riot act. His side of the conversation
was mostly '... but Mom," repeated, and ending with a 'no,
Ma'am, yes, Ma'am."
Yes, permission to spank does still apply.
We sat down on the couch and had a long talk. I'm still not sure
if he's having trouble with PJ or the situation or what. I do
know he was hoping to get his own room when they moved to a
'bigger place', so maybe he's just upset by that. Whatever
happened, he and I came to an understanding that the rules are
their for a reason. I pointed out that there are almost always
going to be at least 20 kids his age or younger around the
house, and usually more like 25 or 30, and I need the help of
him and the older boys who can supervise themselves to do so.
From there, I got him to admit that, when him and the other boys
his age don't do things they know they're supposed to do, which
makes things harder on all the rest of them, I can't let them
get away with it.
I had planned on threatening him with a couple of paddle swats,
but at this point, I decided we needed more. He got a full on,
double pattern session with Red Maple. The worst part for him
was standing there while I bared him. Still, he did take it
pretty well, and he got over my lap without much more than
adjustments. He took it pretty well, but by the time I finished
the first set on his legs, he was sobbing and yelping, and it
wasn't much longer until he was crying. By the time I finished,
he was bawling loud and hard.
The thing is, this might be the first real spanking I've given
him. I think I know how his Mom spanks, and I know how PJ does,
and both of them go with the harder/shorter sessions, so a long,
drawn out session that just keeps building and building was
something to which Kelly wasn't accustomed.
I made him do corner time.
He settled down before his corner time was up. I had him
explain why he'd gotten spanked, and he understood all the
issues, so I let him rub and put his boxers on, then we talked
for a while. He wasn't quite sulky, but he was quiet for a
while, but he did accept a hug and a bit of cuddling, and I
think he and I understand what we expect from each other. At
least the rest of the day went well, and he talked to me a few
minutes before Godzilla: King of the Monsters started yesterday,
so I think things are okay.
#Post#: 13171--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: db105 Date: June 2, 2019, 6:06 pm
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It looks like he made things worse for himself because of his
attitude. It also looks like he has issues with PJ.
[quote author=Jack link=topic=1307.msg13166#msg13166
date=1559493235]
I reminded him that his mother had given me very specific
permission to spank him, but he claimed that was in the past and
didn't apply anymore. [/quote]
When did she give you permission, then? I mean, originally,
before renewing it now.
[quote]The thing is, this might be the first real spanking I've
given him.[/quote]
What do you mean by this? That you have given him swats before
but not a whole spanking?
#Post#: 13172--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: Zyngaru Date: June 2, 2019, 9:30 pm
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Sometimes a young man just needs to be shown that boundaries,
limits and rules still apply when they become teenagers.
#Post#: 13178--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: Jack Date: June 3, 2019, 7:20 am
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[quote author=db105 link=topic=1307.msg13171#msg13171
date=1559516775]
It looks like he made things worse for himself because of his
attitude. It also looks like he has issues with PJ.[/quote]
To be fair, I think it's less a problem with PJ than with the
situation. I'm not sure how long it's been since Bridgette's
divorced, but I do think PJ is the first man with whom she's had
a serious relationship since then, so there are probably a lot
of factors involved with how Kelly feels.
[quote author=db105 link=topic=1307.msg13171#msg13171
date=1559516775]
[quote author=Jack link=topic=1307.msg13166#msg13166
date=1559493235]
I reminded him that his mother had given me very specific
permission to spank him, but he claimed that was in the past and
didn't apply anymore. [/quote]
When did she give you permission, then? I mean, originally,
before renewing it now.[/quote]
I think I mentioned it on here somewhere, so I could probably
tell you for sure. I want to say it was about a year ago, when
it became obvious that her kids were going to be over here a
lot.
[quote author=db105 link=topic=1307.msg13171#msg13171
date=1559516775]
[quote]The thing is, this might be the first real spanking I've
given him.[/quote]
What do you mean by this? That you have given him swats before
but not a whole spanking?
[/quote]
I think so, yes.
[quote author=Zyngaru link=topic=1307.msg13172#msg13172
date=1559529023]
Sometimes a young man just needs to be shown that boundaries,
limits and rules still apply when they become teenagers.
[/quote]
That's definitely true, but in this case, I have the feeling it
was more Kelly exploring his changing situation.
#Post#: 13514--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: Jack Date: June 27, 2019, 7:52 am
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Jake and Dylan Henderson got their butts worn out last night.
The two of them are close friends with a group of boys, which
includes three who live within just 3 or 5 blocks of us - Billy
Worley, Eli Marchant, and Brandon Malone. When they found out
we were watching Godzilla and eating in the theater (and I want
Craig to meet more kids his age who live around here), they
called Billy and Eli. Brandon is currently grounded from his
phone. I told them not to walk over there to ask. They did
anyway. That's not just breaking our rule about leaving without
letting someone know, it was direct disobedience, and the two of
them paid for it with a deluxe session with the Red Maple. They
were both bawling before I finished. Dylan went first, and Jake
was crying before he even went over my lap.
Neither of them is very used to my spanking method, and they
were both also pretty upset with being bared in front of each
other.
Both of them were very sore, and they needed a lot of comforting
before they were able to settle down. Once they had their
shorts back on, we sneaked to my bedroom, so they could clean up
and finish dressing away from the view of their brothers.
#Post#: 13519--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: db105 Date: June 27, 2019, 5:25 pm
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[quote author=Jack link=topic=1307.msg13514#msg13514
date=1561639920]
Neither of them is very used to my spanking method, and they
were both also pretty upset with being bared in front of each
other.
[/quote]
Doesn't PJ spank like you? Although I guess he hasn't spanked
Dylan?
Another question: what's Craig status at your home,
discipline-wise? Do you have authority to spank him if he
misbehaves?
#Post#: 13520--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: Jack Date: June 27, 2019, 5:35 pm
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[quote author=db105 link=topic=1307.msg13519#msg13519
date=1561674334]
Doesn't PJ spank like you? Although I guess he hasn't spanked
Dylan?
[/quote]
TJ tends to not use over the lap, and he tends to give fewer,
but harder smacks. He also tends to spank either side by side
or in separate rooms, so more privacy.
[quote author=db105 link=topic=1307.msg13519#msg13519
date=1561674334]
Another question: what's Craig status at your home,
discipline-wise? Do you have authority to spank him if he
misbehaves?
[/quote]
I think i've said elsewhere (though it might have been in chat)
that Craig is a foster child, so I have no authority to spank
him, and this isn't a 'wink wink, nudge nudge' situation like
when kids are placed here for longterm care.
#Post#: 13527--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: Zyngaru Date: June 27, 2019, 9:55 pm
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[quote author=Jack link=topic=1307.msg13520#msg13520
date=1561674943]
I think i've said elsewhere (though it might have been in chat)
that Craig is a foster child, so I have no authority to spank
him, and this isn't a 'wink wink, nudge nudge' situation like
when kids are placed here for longterm care.
[/quote]
That's a hard rule in both Illinois and Indiana. Absolutely no
spanking. Foster Parents have lost their credentials for
breaking that rule.
I do think their "might" be a problem sometime over the summer,
where Craig does something with some of the other boys and they
get spanked and he gets time out. (Today's spanking report is
an example. What if he went with Jake and Dylan?) I realize
Craig knows the rules about he can't be spanked. Just be
prepared for the emotional conflict with Craig and the other
boys, if the situation comes up.
#Post#: 13533--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: Jack Date: June 28, 2019, 4:49 am
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[quote author=Zyngaru link=topic=1307.msg13527#msg13527
date=1561690519]
[quote author=Jack link=topic=1307.msg13520#msg13520
date=1561674943]
I think i've said elsewhere (though it might have been in chat)
that Craig is a foster child, so I have no authority to spank
him, and this isn't a 'wink wink, nudge nudge' situation like
when kids are placed here for longterm care.
[/quote]
That's a hard rule in both Illinois and Indiana. Absolutely no
spanking. Foster Parents have lost their credentials for
breaking that rule.
[/quote]
It's the same here. While I don't know of anyone who's lost
credentials, I haven't tried to follow or research it.
In my specific case, I work with a judge and people in CPS who
understand that children did not come out of a cookie cutter,
and that 'one solution fits all' usually fits none. The worst
abuse victims I've dealt with (for more than very short term)
are Ethan and Jeremy, who would probably have been returned to
their mom, if not for the drugs, assault, and kidnapping which
came to light. As a matter of fact, even the father might have
regained custody if the abuse was the only question.
Actually, Ryan was the worst case, but that was a non-family
situation and a one time event, so it's a bit different from
someone who was abused over time.
Remember, I became a foster parent to get custody of Caleb from
another state. Ryan was an emergency call by someone having an
epiphany. I had never planned to have any foster kids, much
less 15 of them. I'm only called for specific needs, and the
only kids who are placed here are ones who have a good chance of
fitting in, because if they are placed here, and they decide
they want to stay, everyone directly involved realizes that
means spanking - at least after they're no longer foster kids.
And no, you didn't say anything to upset me, I just want to make
sure the situation is clear.
[quote author=Zyngaru link=topic=1307.msg13527#msg13527
date=1561690519]
I do think their "might" be a problem sometime over the summer,
where Craig does something with some of the other boys and they
get spanked and he gets time out. (Today's spanking report is
an example. What if he went with Jake and Dylan?) I realize
Craig knows the rules about he can't be spanked. Just be
prepared for the emotional conflict with Craig and the other
boys, if the situation comes up.
[/quote]
Actually, we've already talked about this.
While it hasn't happened in a while, I have had short term
placements here, where someone stayed with us just a few days,
while family was tracked down or had to make arrangements to
pick the kids up or care for them. My kids understand that
short term placements are different from the family and the
tribe. I made sure all my kids understand that Craig is a short
termer, so he falls under those different rules.
As for Craig.... He understands that he is a guest here, and
that he is going back to his group home. While we have an
expected date for him to return, if he ends up disrupting our
home, I'm sure he understands that his visit could be cut short.
On the other hand, I've already considered that, and if a
legitimate problem arises with something like this, then all
three kids would have received the same punishment, even if that
means no spanking.
#Post#: 13537--------------------------------------------------
Re: Summer '19 Spanking Report
By: Zyngaru Date: June 28, 2019, 11:11 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for the details Jack. Your home is so unique that it has
to have special rules to function. It is good the other boys
understand that where they would get a spanking, because Craig
is short term, guest, that he may get a restriction. Lose of
pool privilege for the day or something. In the Texas heat, I
am sure the other boys would think they got off easy with the
spanking, instead of having to sit out of the pool and watch
everyone else cool off in the pool.
I'm sure that Craig is going to do his best to fit in and have
fun while visiting. But he is a 13 year old boy and sometimes
that age of a boy just finds trouble without even looking for
it.
I should have known, you would have had all angles figured out
and dealt with before inviting Craig for the visit.
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