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#Post#: 938--------------------------------------------------
Devon Wells (13)
By: Jack Date: October 18, 2017, 4:54 pm
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At some point over the summer, Devon [s]was corrupted by his big
bro[/s] decided he wanted to play football. The seventh graders
have first period athletics and have to be at school at 7am for
practice. That means he has to get up at 6am, which has been a
point of contention for us a couple of times. He gets in
trouble if he isn't on time, which was also a problem for he and
I.
Actually, I posted this in September, which should give you an
idea.
[quote]Devon is about to get his butt blistered at home, even if
the coach doesn't paddle him.
As I said, 7th grade practice is before school, and the boys
have to be there, dressed out, and lined up for roll, at 7am.
Dev doesn't like to get up early or go to bed before his
brothers. I was understanding of that, and rushed to get him and
Leif moved and some privacy arranged for them (room dividers
between their beds), so it would be easier for them. However, he
was still late last Friday (after I woke him up 3 times), and he
had to run laps at the end of practice. When he got home, he
started complaining and blamed me and Ethan (his ride that
morning). He shouldn't have needed to blow steam, but I let it
go a little. I finally yanked him up short and explained that he
could apologize to Ethan or start riding his bike (still dark
now, so I probably wouldn't really do that, but I would consider
it). When he backtalked me again, I put him on zero tolerance
for going to bed, and one wake up - if he misses, that's his
problem.
He's done much better the past... Well, this week was Labor Day,
so I guess just yesterday, but he at least went to bed without a
problem last night, so we'll see.[/quote]
I never had to enforce the zero tolerance. I think he realized
he'd screwed up and was willing to accept that. However, this
week, with Ev in the room he and Leif share, he seems to have
had a bit of trouble. I don't know if it's coincidence or not,
but I've been having to go back in there more than once. I
don't especially mind that. The nights have cooled off a lot
this week, and I always sleep better that way. Plus, the first
night, I forgot to reset the thermostat to start warming up
before 6am, so that probably made it a bit harder for him to get
out of bed. However, it's been three mornings in a row now,
which is a real problem, because all three of those boys need
showers in the morning, and it also puts his driver running
late, so I had to lay down the law when they got home from
school. I didn't specify a consequence, but Dev knows he's
treading on thin ice right now, and I'm probably going to make
all three boys go to bed early this evening.
#Post#: 941--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: Zyngaru Date: October 18, 2017, 5:26 pm
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[quote]However, it's been three mornings in a row now, which is
a real problem, because all three of those boys need showers in
the morning, and it also puts his driver running late, so I had
to lay down the law when they got home from school. I didn't
specify a consequence, but Dev knows he's treading on thin ice
right now, and I'm probably going to make all three boys go to
bed early this evening.[/quote]
If all three are having a problem getting up then yes, to bed a
little earlier and continue moving it up earlier each evening,
until you find the right bedtime for them, to be able to get up
in the morning when called.
If it is just one having the problem, as in Devon, then earlier
bedtime for just him probably won't work, because if he did go
to sleep, he probably would be woke up with the others went to
bed. But more than likely he would still be awake waiting on
them to go to bed.
I would probably let him know he is old enough to be getting up
on his own, after one wake up call. If he doesn't, then I am
thinking football doesn't mean that much to him and I would tell
him so. I would let him know his ride comes at such and such
time. If you are ready then you get a ride otherwise you miss
your ride and will go to school with the others. If that means
you miss football practice, because you are not responsible
enough to get up on time, then so be it. If repeated missing
practice means you are off the team, then that means that you
are not serious about wanting to play football to put the work
into it.
I look at it that boys will get up for things they want to do.
I was always difficult to get up for school. But on Friday
night if Grandpa told me we would go fishing early in the
morning, I would be up and ready before the sun came up. It was
all about what we want to do.
I would give him the option of having me make him go to bed
earlier, if he just doesn't have the WILL power to do it on his
own, but as far as the rules about getting up, those would stay
the same. It isn't fair that Ethan runs late because of Devon
running late.
But here again, this is real life, so you have to do it the way
that best fits you.
#Post#: 948--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: Adric Date: October 18, 2017, 7:20 pm
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[quote author=Zyngaru link=topic=110.msg941#msg941
date=1508365573]
I would let him know his ride comes at such and such time. If
you are ready then you get a ride otherwise you miss your ride
and will go to school with the others. If that means you miss
football practice, because you are not responsible enough to get
up on time, then so be it. If repeated missing practice means
you are off the team, then that means that you are not serious
about wanting to play football to put the work into it. ... It
isn't fair that Ethan runs late because of Devon running
late.[/quote]
I'm with Zyn on this. Jack shouldn't have to play alarm clock
repeatedly and Ethan shouldn't have to risk being late to wait
for Devon. Devon can screw up if he wants to and the
consequence is losing the football opportunity.
#Post#: 956--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: David M. Katz Date: October 19, 2017, 5:27 am
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[quote author=Adric link=topic=110.msg948#msg948
date=1508372413]
[quote author=Zyngaru link=topic=110.msg941#msg941
date=1508365573]
I would let him know his ride comes at such and such time. If
you are ready then you get a ride otherwise you miss your ride
and will go to school with the others. If that means you miss
football practice, because you are not responsible enough to get
up on time, then so be it. If repeated missing practice means
you are off the team, then that means that you are not serious
about wanting to play football to put the work into it. ... It
isn't fair that Ethan runs late because of Devon running
late.[/quote]
I'm with Zyn on this. Jack shouldn't have to play alarm clock
repeatedly and Ethan shouldn't have to risk being late to wait
for Devon. Devon can screw up if he wants to and the
consequence is losing the football opportunity.
[/quote]
Agreed.
----------------------
When is football season over?
#Post#: 968--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: Jack Date: October 19, 2017, 1:18 pm
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[quote author=David M. Katz link=topic=110.msg956#msg956
date=1508408826]When is football season over?
[/quote]
It's the weekend before Thanksgiving for the High School team.
For middle school it's.....
the first week of November, so three more games to go.
[hr]
I did send Devon to bed about 15 minutes early last night, and
'strongly suggested' the other two might want to settle down and
read quietly before bed.
The way we have their room set up, if they're in bed, they have
dim light and some quiet, even with the overhead on. I think
that would have been plenty, but the real point I wanted to make
was that they needed to calm down before bedtime, instead of
just trying to jump in bed and go to sleep. Of course, none of
those three have an official bedtime anyway, but they generally
know when they need to be abed to wake easily, and they know
that they don't want Dad taking over for them.
Dev was easier to wake this morning, and Clay made it there in
plenty of time (we rotate who drives him - it's not the same
person every day).
#Post#: 1866--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: Jack Date: December 1, 2017, 7:01 am
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Devon got spanked Wednesday night. The details are in BOTD
Extra: Added Offenses.
HTML https://jackshouse.createaforum.com/botd/botd-extra-added-offenses/
It wasn't really a huge deal. The only reason it received a
BOTD Extra standard is that he managed to stack several
behaviors on top of each other.
#Post#: 4753--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: Jack Date: March 29, 2018, 5:19 am
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Well, after a run of pretty good behavior, Devon ended up over
Dad's lap again. The details are in the March Spanking Report
HTML https://jackshouse.createaforum.com/anecdotes/march-spanking-report/msg4752/#msg4752
#Post#: 8576--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: Jack Date: September 5, 2018, 6:15 am
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I just want to mention that Devon's having trouble again this
year.
8th graders have football practice after school, so Devon's not
having the trouble with having to get up and moving real early
like he did last year. On the other hand, he's not getting home
until about 5pm. That means things are tight on him, and he's
not having as much free time as normal. In one way, that's not
too bad, since he does enjoy football, and he's getting more
time with his school friends. On the other hand, even with me
giving him a bit of extra attention and guidance, he's still
having trouble with getting everything done. I know he's not
getting all his screen time, and he's not happy about that. I've
talked to him about it, but he's not unhappy enough that he
wants to quit football. What he really wants is to quit
homework and chores. I've made it clear that's not going to
happen, though I have tried to lighten his chores a bit, without
being unfair to the other boys who don't have practice every
day.
Last week, I 'traded' some stuff with Dev. I did his laundry
(last Tuesday?), and, in return, he did some of the general
laundry (sheets and towels) on Saturday.
So far, we haven't reached the point where spanking is on the
table, even as a threat. Football has barely started, and I
know we still have two solid months and a bit to go, so we need
to figure out a way to get through this. I am trying to work
with his chores a bit, to give him a bit more free time in the
evenings. In the end, he's really just going to have to realize
that football is a major commitment, and sometimes you have to
miss one thing you like because of something else you like.
#Post#: 8577--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: Zyngaru Date: September 5, 2018, 6:22 am
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[quote author=Jack link=topic=110.msg8576#msg8576
date=1536146128]
In the end, he's really just going to have to realize that
football is a major commitment, and sometimes you have to miss
one thing you like because of something else you like.
[/quote]
Life is about prioritizing.
#Post#: 8578--------------------------------------------------
Re: Devon Wells (13)
By: Jack Date: September 5, 2018, 2:12 pm
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[quote author=Zyngaru link=topic=110.msg8577#msg8577
date=1536146571]
[quote author=Jack link=topic=110.msg8576#msg8576
date=1536146128]
In the end, he's really just going to have to realize that
football is a major commitment, and sometimes you have to miss
one thing you like because of something else you like.
[/quote]
Life is about prioritizing.
[/quote]
True, but sometimes priorities differ.
Also, all work and no play makes Devon a dull boy....
He just needs to remember that football is not only his own
choice, but it's also a type of play. And even I'll admit, he
is working hard.
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