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#Post#: 27600--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: offtopicalways Date: October 10, 2021, 1:49 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=acl-ny link=topic=379.msg27593#msg27593
date=1633891263]
Not funny, but memorable to me. I made a 21 lb turkey for my
first Thanksgiving in my very own apartment. The guests were my
mom, dad, and grandma. 21 lbs for 4 people. But hey, it was on
sale an less expensive than the smaller birds.
[/quote]
I ended up with a 26 lb turkey because I was at Costco, and
tha's what was left. We were 4 people, including the 18 month
old. A few years ago, I could only find a 12 lb-er, and was
teased about serving "a chicken."
#Post#: 27601--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: CatDancing Date: October 10, 2021, 1:55 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=offtopicalways link=topic=379.msg27600#msg27600
date=1633891785]
[quote author=acl-ny link=topic=379.msg27593#msg27593
date=1633891263]
Not funny, but memorable to me. I made a 21 lb turkey for my
first Thanksgiving in my very own apartment. The guests were my
mom, dad, and grandma. 21 lbs for 4 people. But hey, it was on
sale an less expensive than the smaller birds.
[/quote]
I ended up with a 26 lb turkey because I was at Costco, and
tha's what was left. We were 4 people, including the 18 month
old. A few years ago, I could only find a 12 lb-er, and was
teased about serving "a chicken."
[/quote]
Poor little turkey! Maybe if you put it in the sun and kept it
watered, it would get bigger --
#Post#: 27603--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: HeddyL2627 Date: October 10, 2021, 1:59 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=acl-ny link=topic=379.msg27598#msg27598
date=1633891757]
Now one that's a little teeny bit funnier, and has become a
catch phrase in our house.
[/quote]
I left off what’s become our catchphrase re: birthday cakes in
the story below: “but is it twice baked??” 😂😂
#Post#: 27604--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: pamelaaos Date: October 10, 2021, 1:59 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Not me, but my SIL. She and my brother had been over for dinner
and I had made my one-dish chocolate pan cake. She wanted the
recipe. So she sat down with my recipe and a blank card and
started copying.
The next week she called me laughing hysterically and said she
needed the recipe again - the complete one! When she was copying
it she wrote down an ingredient amount and accidentally skipped
to the next line and wrote the name for the next ingredient. So,
she made it, popped it into the oven and after a while it had
turned into a volcano and was oozing "lava" over all the sides
of the pan.
Instead of 1 TSP of baking soda, she had used 3 TBSP and had
left out the cocoa!
#Post#: 27606--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: acl-ny Date: October 10, 2021, 2:01 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=TwoASAPsAgo link=topic=379.msg27595#msg27595
date=1633891405]
[quote author=TwoASAPsAgo link=topic=379.msg27579#msg27579
date=1633890162]
Me: "Do you think we can just pick around the glass? I just
want to taste."
Andrea: "I wouldn't."
Me: "What if we put it through a strainer?"
Andrea: [Gives me the are-you-crazy look ...]
[/quote]
Hmmm, 20 years later, this part of the dialogue sounds
suspiciously like one I had maybe a year ago at the Old Place
with a bunch of you, when the ceramic bowl I was using to mix a
cheesecake fell off the counter and shattered. Some things
don't change, I guess.
[/quote]
If it makes you feel better, just recently I bought a jar of
peanut butter. It fell (forgot that our newer washing machine
is slanted, not flat, on top and I put it down "for just a
second". I tried removing all the broken glass to just keep
the center part, tried to salvage some of the peanut butter.
Told Mr. what happened, suggested he check it carefully before
eating any (I don't eat peanut butter). Naturally, as careful
as I though I was scraping out some usable pb, I failed. There
was glass in it.
Good thing I had bought a second jar at the same time.
#Post#: 27607--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: MinArlington Date: October 10, 2021, 2:01 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
When I was a teenager, probably 15, my Mom left for a week to
visit relatives, leaving me home with my Dad. He had a very
limited diet, so she left me with instructions to cook him a
hamburger patty each night, with a chopped shallot in it. And
fried potatoes. Easy enough.
I should also add that my mother and I were not getting along at
this time in our lives.
She comes home and immediately goes down to the basement and
comes back up hopping mad. "I gave you ONE job to do while I was
gone and you couldn't even do that!" I was floored because every
night I had gone downstairs, grabbed a shallot (picked from our
garden) and cooked his burger with chopped shallot, just as
instructed. So I told her that. "I just looked and there are no
shallots missing! You probably can't even show me the bag
they're in!"
So downstairs we go, and I take her to the bag and show her that
yes in fact there are fewer than when she left, because I did
what I was told. I look at Mom and her eyes are closed. She
finally says "... those are tulips."
Mom: are tulips poisonous? Me: clearly not.
We never did tell Dad.
#Post#: 27608--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: Thetis099 Date: October 10, 2021, 2:03 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
My grandad made "wine" and beer. His "wine" was made from
Mustang grapes or plums and had a much higher percentage of
alchohol than traditional wine. I will use a substitute name
for my grandad, but we all called his wine "Old John" as a play
on Old Crow whiskey - because his "wine" was very potent and it
tasted terrible. Nobody but grandad really drank it. Many
unsuspecting folks were lured into trying a glass. It was fun
to watch their faces when they tasted it and who would be polite
enough to try and drink the whole glass before he would let them
off the hook.
The major mishap happened with grandad's brewing efforts. My
grandparents had a two car garage with a big laundry and storage
room. There were lots of shelves full of preserves and pickles
and whatever else grandma had canned from their garden. His
most recent effort at brewing a case of beer had been bottled
and was being stored on a high shelf.
When they came back from church on Sunday, the garage smelled of
beer. Grandma opened the laundry room and found most of the
case of bottled beer had bursted open their caps. Beer had
spewed into every nook and cranny of the laundry room. It was a
terrible mess.
My grandad was in serious trouble with my grandma over the beer
soaked the laundry room. His first few attempts at cleaning up
the beer disaster left the laundry room smelling like sour stale
beer in the Texas summer heat. By the time he had properly
atoned for this transgression he had taken everything out of the
laundry room (including the washer and dryer) to bleach every
surface. He also repainted the laundry room. Grandad stuck to
making only the "Old John" after that.
#Post#: 27609--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: animaniactoo Date: October 10, 2021, 2:03 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Alrighty, my sister and the drowned pizza.
We had a standing Fri night pizza night when we were kids, and
our parents were often out. On one memorable night, my sister
put a slice of pizza on her plate, and was busy blabbing away at
one or the other of us and completely missed that she had missed
when she reached for the garlic powder to sprinkle on her plate,
and promptly drowned her plate with her glass of orange soda.
The unfortunate part was the point where she had turned her head
back just in time to realize what was wrong (as the rest of us
were looking and pointing), but was passed the tipping point of
preventing her hand from continuing to pour.
There were many many jokes over the years about making sure
you're holding the garlic powder...
#Post#: 27611--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: animaniactoo Date: October 10, 2021, 2:08 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=MinArlington link=topic=379.msg27607#msg27607
date=1633892506]
When I was a teenager, probably 15, my Mom left for a week to
visit relatives, leaving me home with my Dad. He had a very
limited diet, so she left me with instructions to cook him a
hamburger patty each night, with a chopped shallot in it. And
fried potatoes. Easy enough.
I should also add that my mother and I were not getting along at
this time in our lives.
She comes home and immediately goes down to the basement and
comes back up hopping mad. "I gave you ONE job to do while I was
gone and you couldn't even do that!" I was floored because every
night I had gone downstairs, grabbed a shallot (picked from our
garden) and cooked his burger with chopped shallot, just as
instructed. So I told her that. "I just looked and there are no
shallots missing! You probably can't even show me the bag
they're in!"
So downstairs we go, and I take her to the bag and show her that
yes in fact there are fewer than when she left, because I did
what I was told. I look at Mom and her eyes are closed. She
finally says "... those are tulips."
Mom: are tulips poisonous? Me: clearly not.
We never did tell Dad.
[/quote]
Edible flowers are a thing! You were just ahead of your time.
That's the story and you're sticking with it, right? 😂
#Post#: 27612--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cooking/Food Hoot
By: MidwestmikkiJ Date: October 10, 2021, 2:08 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=MinArlington link=topic=379.msg27607#msg27607
date=1633892506]
When I was a teenager, probably 15, my Mom left for a week to
visit relatives, leaving me home with my Dad. He had a very
limited diet, so she left me with instructions to cook him a
hamburger patty each night, with a chopped shallot in it. And
fried potatoes. Easy enough.
I should also add that my mother and I were not getting along at
this time in our lives.
She comes home and immediately goes down to the basement and
comes back up hopping mad. "I gave you ONE job to do while I was
gone and you couldn't even do that!" I was floored because every
night I had gone downstairs, grabbed a shallot (picked from our
garden) and cooked his burger with chopped shallot, just as
instructed. So I told her that. "I just looked and there are no
shallots missing! You probably can't even show me the bag
they're in!"
So downstairs we go, and I take her to the bag and show her that
yes in fact there are fewer than when she left, because I did
what I was told. I look at Mom and her eyes are closed. She
finally says "... those are tulips."
Mom: are tulips poisonous? Me: clearly not.
We never did tell Dad.
[/quote]
Not telling Dad was a thing when cooking at our house. I
remember once my Mom finding those little bugs in the flour.
There was no way she was throwing all that away so we sifted the
bugs out. We were admonished to "not tell Dad".
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