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#Post#: 20441--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: BethinDC2AZ
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:35 pm
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--- Quote from: Chicagogirl22 link ---
>
> Pool Update:
>
> Please never house sit again.
>
--- End Quote ---
Right?! In fact, never ever get in a situation where you might
have to share space with another human being.
#Post#: 20442--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: Esme Rain
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:36 pm
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LW going to be with strangers at first social event.
Ummm. As I posted here weekend before last we had two (outdoor;
25 ish pple each) social events. First since the pandemic
except for two or three gatherings of 4 women on a patio.
I must say, the social skills a little rusty. I'm not sure I'd
mind so much greasing the social skills among people I'd not
need to count on ever seeing again.
I was _exhausted_ after too.
#Post#: 20445--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: Chicagogirl22
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:36 pm
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--- Quote from: Queenie link ---
>
> I would like to defend the "weddings are a few hours"
tradition. It's a perfectly valid way to go and I think it's as
fine for those people to view the "several days" way as OTT as
it is for the "several days" people to feel that the "several
hours" folks are under-doing it.
>
> I definitely bristled when my kids were very small and Mr Q
was invited to a number of groomsmen's events that were supposed
to take several days each. We have lives, you know! Also, a
budget.
>
--- End Quote ---
I think the LW was overwhelmed. She was expecting one day with
her ex she intensely dislikes and now she has 3 days, plus one
of them where he is the host.
#Post#: 20446--------------------------------------------------
Pool/Dog sitter update
DIR By: MinArlington
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:36 pm
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Maybe I'm the only one but I'm not getting the feeling that the
relative/pool owner is necessarily this permissive with
neighbors. I'm guessing the neighbors are just running
rough-shod over the house sitter because they can. If the owner
does have a 24/7 open pool policy, that should have been made
clear up front.
#Post#: 20447--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: buffylover73
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:37 pm
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--- Quote from: BethinDC2AZ link ---
>
> Ugh. I hate pool lady even more post update than before.
>
--- End Quote ---
I had to go back and read last week's chat since I missed it.
She seems a bit...rigid.
#Post#: 20448--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: GladGrace
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:37 pm
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I'm not totally on board with assuming that all controlling
people are motivated by anxiety. Sometimes they are, as in: "You
have to have to call me when your flight gets in or I'll be up
all night." Others are manipulative assholes who get pleasure
and satisfaction from their puppetry, as in: "If you marry
outside our race, religion, or culture, I'll disinherit you,
right after I try to get the rest of the family to shun you."
#Post#: 20449--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: badpoodle
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:38 pm
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Ok House sitter, your family member did NOT "ironically" tell
you not to hesitate telling the neighbors you don't want
visitors. Her very good friends/neighbors told her what a bitch
you were to them. Instead of just directly saying you wish they
would leave, you did it passive aggressively. LAME.
I question not being able to drive more than a mile in any
direction when you are unfamiliar with a town. I mean really?
The neighbors looking out for the best interest of their friend
and her dog kind of tells me everything I need to know about the
dynamic.
#Post#: 20450--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: Queenie
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:39 pm
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Tangential:
LW isolated due to covid and others did not and their
relationships grew and blossomed while hers did not.
To dismiss this very real consequence is foolhardy at best.
It's a distinct possibility.
#Post#: 20451--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: badpoodle
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:39 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: Chicagogirl22 link ---
>
> [quote author=Queenie link=topic=347.msg20434#msg20434
date=1632504723]
> I would like to defend the "weddings are a few hours"
tradition. It's a perfectly valid way to go and I think it's as
fine for those people to view the "several days" way as OTT as
it is for the "several days" people to feel that the "several
hours" folks are under-doing it.
>
> I definitely bristled when my kids were very small and Mr Q
was invited to a number of groomsmen's events that were supposed
to take several days each. We have lives, you know! Also, a
budget.
>
--- End Quote ---
I think the LW was overwhelmed. She was expecting one day with
her ex she intensely dislikes and now she has 3 days, plus one
of them where he is the host.
[/quote]
Where he and his current wife are hosts, no less.
#Post#: 20452--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: Esme Rain
Date: September 24, 2021, 12:40 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: badpoodle link ---
>
> Oh man, mother of the groom, stop being so rigid!
>
> I know, I know, that isn't fair because she is who she is but
holy hell. Sometimes it's ok to break the rules. Rigidity tends
to make people not feel close to you. LW could have totally met
the fiance outdoors with masks on or whatever and not broken the
rules.
>
> Bringing up the college tuition she paid and the divorce
decree when asked about a wedding contribution - totally
unnecessary and hurtful. If she is pondering informing everyone
of her ex's infidelity I hope she knows the only person it will
reflect poorly on is her.
>
> I have a couple of people in my life who have this inability
to see what it is about themselves that keeps them from having
the close personal relationships they observe in others. It is
both frustrating and sad.
>
--- End Quote ---
I mean maybe maybe not. We weren't allowed to go for walks with
others. Now mind you might you have bumped into each other
while doing an essential errand and walked back together. But
still.
Her current and past financial state is not clear to me. If 1/3
nearly wiped her out and means she has barely a crumb saved for
retirement but that is the only way she could get tight-fisted
but rich ex to contribute...well I see why she is sensitive
still about it. Mind you she doesn't plead poverty in the
letter.
I think you're right though it is about the infidelity. Getting
ready for a wedding is bringing that to the surface again.
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