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#Post#: 20378--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: floridafan15
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:51 am
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--- Quote from: buffylover73 link ---
>
> [quote author=armybrat link=topic=347.msg20367#msg20367
date=1632501849]
> Mother of the groom: this LW is deeply unhappy, and trying to
take it out on the son's wedding.
>
> She doesn't want to pay? No problem; she has no obligation to.
But just keep your mouth shut about others paying; it's their
choice not yours.
>
> My dirty lens: I just paid the deposit on the reception venue
for middle's wedding next year. Yeah, I lost the "discussion"
with my wife and I'm paying :-)
>
--- End Quote ---
She listed way too many examples of how her feelings were hurt.
I checked out halfway through reading. She sounds bitter.
[/quote]
I'm betting this makes a column. This is a feast for the
commentariat.
#Post#: 20380--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: iamnotarobot
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:52 am
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: Esme Rain link ---
>
> [quote author=iamnotarobot link=topic=347.msg20371#msg20371
date=1632502004]
> "Shortly before the pandemic, my son started dating a woman he
is now engaged to. I do not know her very well because I was
sticking to the rules and avoiding socializing."
>
> What? This is a rule? I'm not terribly well versed on
etiquette but I've never heard of that.
>
--- End Quote ---
Pandemic rules.
[/quote]
I was debating another cup of coffee, and it seems clear I
should go ahead with it ;)
#Post#: 20381--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: Queenie
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:53 am
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--- Quote from: BethinDC2AZ link ---
>
> Why do people stay in relationships that are so unstable just
meeting a friend could destroy it? She must be terrified ALL.
The. Time. that he'll run across a woman more his type and dump
her. Is being single so awful it's worth this kind of stress? I
just don't get it.
>
--- End Quote ---
I bet this is at least 75% and likely 100% in Bonnie's head.
#Post#: 20382--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: guest154
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:54 am
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: iamnotarobot link ---
>
> [quote author=Esme Rain link=topic=347.msg20379#msg20379
date=1632502321]
> [quote author=iamnotarobot link=topic=347.msg20371#msg20371
date=1632502004]
> "Shortly before the pandemic, my son started dating a woman he
is now engaged to. I do not know her very well because I was
sticking to the rules and avoiding socializing."
>
> What? This is a rule? I'm not terribly well versed on
etiquette but I've never heard of that.
>
--- End Quote ---
Pandemic rules.
[/quote]
I was debating another cup of coffee, and it seems clear I
should go ahead with it ;)
[/quote]
Only if it's Irish
#Post#: 20383--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: Esme Rain
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:55 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Oh some sad ones today "You can't meet my boyfriend because
he'll prefer you." Daughter who wants to move to the midwest
finally realizing her worth.
Even mother of the groom's self-destructive crankiness sad. She
feels she did the right things: was faithful in her marriage,
obeyed the covid-rules. And other's bend the rules and get the
glory.
It's very nice they plan to have a nice party and there is money
around for that. That doesn't mean she can't be close to them
because she is not hosting the party. Not at all.
But if she sulks about the party and at it she will drive a
wedge.
#Post#: 20384--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: buffylover73
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:55 am
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: floridafan15 link ---
>
> [quote author=buffylover73 link=topic=347.msg20370#msg20370
date=1632501972]
> [quote author=armybrat link=topic=347.msg20367#msg20367
date=1632501849]
> Mother of the groom: this LW is deeply unhappy, and trying to
take it out on the son's wedding.
>
> She doesn't want to pay? No problem; she has no obligation to.
But just keep your mouth shut about others paying; it's their
choice not yours.
>
> My dirty lens: I just paid the deposit on the reception venue
for middle's wedding next year. Yeah, I lost the "discussion"
with my wife and I'm paying :-)
>
--- End Quote ---
She listed way too many examples of how her feelings were hurt.
I checked out halfway through reading. She sounds bitter.
[/quote]
I'm betting this makes a column. This is a feast for the
commentariat.
[/quote]
Also, a lot of weddings have a rehearsal dinner the night
before, the ceremony and then brunch/gift opening for family the
next day. Ours did and we only had 50 people in attendance and
got married in a park.
Sure, she's got angst/anxiety or whatever, but she didn't say
she couldn't afford to contribute. Just that she paid 1/3 of
college per the divorce decree and adults old enough to be
married can pay for it themselves. Which doesn't paint her in a
generous light.
That'd be the day I stayed away from Hax comments for sure.
#Post#: 20385--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: Artemis1982
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:55 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Re mother of the groom: I wonder if the new wife was dad's
affair partner. Regardless, Carolyn's advice was harsh but
needed. I would advise her to make more of an effort to get to
know her new DIL, and make sure her son knows that she is
supportive of them.
#Post#: 20387--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: MidwestmikkiJ
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:56 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I must be feeling critical today. I didn’t much like the Mom who
won’t contribute toward her son’s wedding and now resents
everyone else who will. Decisions have consequences, lady.
I’m also not feeling much good will to the LW who wants to diss
the “niece” because it’s complicated. When I was that age my Mom
often added my name to wedding and shower gifts to relatives.
Sometimes I probably paid for part of it but I’ll bet she did it
and never even told me at times. Eventually I was viewed as a
separate adult by the family and then I began to purchase and
send my own gifts. Give the young woman a break even if you
think that for some reason she doesn’t deserve it.
#Post#: 20388--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: Esme Rain
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:56 am
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: iamnotarobot link ---
>
> [quote author=Esme Rain link=topic=347.msg20379#msg20379
date=1632502321]
> [quote author=iamnotarobot link=topic=347.msg20371#msg20371
date=1632502004]
> "Shortly before the pandemic, my son started dating a woman he
is now engaged to. I do not know her very well because I was
sticking to the rules and avoiding socializing."
>
> What? This is a rule? I'm not terribly well versed on
etiquette but I've never heard of that.
>
--- End Quote ---
Pandemic rules.
[/quote]
I was debating another cup of coffee, and it seems clear I
should go ahead with it ;)
[/quote]
Sorry to have piled on notrobot. I may need to join you in the
coffee to improve my posting speed!
#Post#: 20389--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/24
DIR By: guest154
Date: September 24, 2021, 11:56 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Today's chat is what you'd call a "target-rich environment."
Shower gifts - they bought it; put Julie's name on; and provided
it. Send Julie the thank-you note.
Dirty lens: growing up continents away from extended family,
most of my gifts from grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.
were never actually seen or touched by the "sender." My parents
bought it and told them what they got me. Money may or may not
have changed hands, depending on the balance of payments once
all the gifts from us/gifts from them settled out.
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