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#Post#: 14108--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: Esme Rain Date: September 10, 2021, 11:49 am
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[quote author=Queenie link=topic=277.msg14098#msg14098
date=1631292274]
[quote author=Heron link=topic=277.msg14090#msg14090
date=1631291955]
[quote author=Queenie link=topic=277.msg14088#msg14088
date=1631291814]
The script for the friend of the spouse of the cancer victim is
just so bad.
[/quote]
What would you advise?
[/quote]
I don't know about advise, but in a similar spot I might suggest
a grief support group and then fade back myself.
[/quote]
I am not sure that is not the most practical while the mourning
friend in this mode. On this bit of her grief you can't help
her. There will be other phases.
#Post#: 14111--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: BethinDC2AZ Date: September 10, 2021, 11:54 am
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[quote author=GenuineKosherDill link=topic=277.msg14103#msg14103
date=1631292516]
[quote author=BethinDC2AZ link=topic=277.msg14096#msg14096
date=1631292246]
[quote author=GenuineKosherDill link=topic=277.msg14093#msg14093
date=1631292014]
It would depend on their ages. Granted he's an ass and a
disappointment, but disrupting a child or young adult's entire
belief system about their father, just to make the mom seem more
righteous, seems as though it could have lifelong ramifications.
She's suffering massive disillusionment, but is it really
necessary for them to suffer to the same degree? He might have
some good qualities as a parent.
[/quote]
I've never understood this need some people have to keep parents
on pedestals. Personally, I think it makes it harder for kids to
grow up and develop adult relationships with their parents when
their parent's faults and failures are kept hidden.
[/quote]
I think there is a range between "pedestal" and "I'm dumping
this useless man of no integrity." As someone else said, it is
unclear if the husband has a lifelong trait of slacking/cheating
or if he made one big stumble. Cutting him down to the ground
in the eyes of his teenagers seems like vengeful twisting of the
knife, especially if he's done a decent job of contributing his
share of the family income and parenting.
I would not respect or be with a man like that, but I wouldn't
preen myself over righteously exposing his flaws to his kids,
either.
[/quote]
I think you can probably convey the truth of what happened
without calling him useless and without integrity.
#Post#: 14112--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: AbidingDudev4.1 Date: September 10, 2021, 11:57 am
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Nosypryingquestion: Why are you bald?
retort: Dunno, just lucky I guess
#Post#: 14115--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: Queenie Date: September 10, 2021, 11:58 am
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rereading the evil lying husband letter, this jumps out at me:
[quote]I knew he was unhappy at work and had wanted to retire
early (he just turned 62) but with 2 children headed for college
we just couldn’t afford it. [/quote]
And my question is this: who decided that?
#Post#: 14116--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: GenuineKosherDill Date: September 10, 2021, 11:59 am
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Unvaccinated lunch invitee: It's mindboggling that 18 months
in, anyone has to ask this.
Elderly driver: The man is not unaware he is 80. He's just
being stubborn. "Walter, we'll pick you up at 2pm. No, you've
done your share; we'll be driving from now on. It's safer." If
he balks, say you'll meet them at the venue. Or offer to
install Uber or Lyft on his smartphone.
Husband being mean to stepson: Why, oh why, oh why do women put
up with men who mistreat their offspring? Why? Dealbreaker.
Young bald man: People who are that obtuse aren't going to be
put off by snappy comebacks. Just walk away. And for what it's
worth, the two baldest men in my newsroom are considered via
office scuttlebutt to be the most attractive, by women ranging
from 25 to 65. Not that that assuages all of his understandable
dismay if he doesn't want to be bald, but at least it's a more
mainstream look these days.
#Post#: 14117--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: animaniactoo Date: September 10, 2021, 11:59 am
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Re: Transference.
Oh go ahead and be defensive. "I understand that you're
grieving. I acknowledge that there are bad doctors in this
world. I don't think that most of them are. I think most doctors
try very hard for their patients, and I need you to understand
that I have a hard time listening to you talk about this given
that my husband is a doctor."
Grieving is not a free pass to be offensive/outrageous/etc. with
no pushback at all. Some of the pushback is how people get
themselves back on track sometimes. Or recognize they need more
help. Or. Or.
Go ahead and be defensive.
#Post#: 14119--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: iamnotarobot Date: September 10, 2021, 12:00 pm
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unvaxxed partner visiting retirement community-
I'm curious what the answer would have been if the couple in the
retirement community isn't vaccinated and wanted them to come
anyway. Unfortunately that's a lot of people I know.
#Post#: 14121--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: BethinDC2AZ Date: September 10, 2021, 12:01 pm
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[quote author=iamnotarobot link=topic=277.msg14119#msg14119
date=1631293210]
unvaxxed partner visiting retirement community-
I'm curious what the answer would have been if the couple in the
retirement community isn't vaccinated and wanted them to come
anyway. Unfortunately that's a lot of people I know.
[/quote]
I bet they go anyway. The selfishness of the unmasked unvaxxed
knows no bounds.
#Post#: 14123--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: Queenie Date: September 10, 2021, 12:01 pm
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I can't help but swim upstream and wonder if unvaxxed partner
has immunity acquired through having had covid.
#Post#: 14125--------------------------------------------------
Re: Live Chat 09/10
By: BethinDC2AZ Date: September 10, 2021, 12:04 pm
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Dogs passing...my coworker put her dog down Wednesday. I feel
like I'm as upset about it as she is. We've all been crying for
a week straight over this.
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