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DIR Return to: Jokes and other (Pun)ishments
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#Post#: 355808--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: LabPartner
Date: November 2, 2025, 10:56 pm
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ME: I committed all seven deadly sins in 30 minutes.
PRIEST: Wow, I have to hear this.
ME: I was angry and envious of my neighbor, so I lazily seduced
his wife. Then I ate all his groceries and didn't share.
PRIEST: You forgot pride.
ME: Oh, no, I'm very proud of myself.
#Post#: 356582--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: Cairn terrier
Date: November 6, 2025, 7:08 am
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My boyfriend was once a member of a nudist colony.
He says that the first few days were the hardest.
#Post#: 359464--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: Tryp_OR
Date: November 19, 2025, 8:49 pm
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Not a joke, really, but definitely off-color.
Picture yourself back in 2000 or even 2020. Would you have ever
expected a headline like this?
"Sales of AI-enabled teddy bear suspended after it gave advice
on BDSM sex and where to find knives"
HTML https://www.cnn.com/2025/11/19/tech/folotoy-kumma-ai-bear-scli-intl?iid=cnn_buildContentRecirc_end_recirc&recs_exp=up-next-article-end&tenant_id=related.en
JBS Haldane: ". . . the universe is not only queerer than we
suppose, but queerer than we can suppose." He was talking about
natural phenomena, but nothing can beat human weirdness.
#Post#: 359476--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: kkt
Date: November 19, 2025, 10:29 pm
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--- Quote from: Tryp_OR link ---
>
> Not a joke, really, but definitely off-color.
>
> Picture yourself back in 2000 or even 2020. Would you have
ever expected a headline like this?
>
> "Sales of AI-enabled teddy bear suspended after it gave advice
on BDSM sex and where to find knives"
>
HTML https://www.cnn.com/2025/11/19/tech/folotoy-kumma-ai-bear-scli-intl?iid=cnn_buildContentRecirc_end_recirc&recs_exp=up-next-article-end&tenant_id=related.en
>
> JBS Haldane: ". . . the universe is not only queerer than we
suppose, but queerer than we can suppose." He was talking about
natural phenomena, but nothing can beat human weirdness.
>
--- End Quote ---
Truthfully, no. Freaky sex has always been popular in any
medium that was available.
Did you happen to see the travelling exhibit of artifacts from
Pompei that toured the U.S. about 6 years ish ago? Did you go
into the 18 and over room? Pornagraphic mosaic art from 2000
years ago! On the walls of baths.
#Post#: 363227--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: Lurknomore
Date: December 9, 2025, 6:42 pm
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Xmas card
#Post#: 363724--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: Lurknomore
Date: December 12, 2025, 8:53 am
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An old joke on Reddit. Comments were good though.
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at
the pearly gates. 'In honor of this holy season' Saint Peter
said, 'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas
to get into heaven.' The Englishman fumbled through his pockets
and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. 'It's a candle', he
said. 'You may pass through the pearly gates' Saint Peter said.
The Scotsman reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of
keys. He shook them and said, 'They're bells.' Saint Peter said
'You may pass through the pearly gates'. The Irishman started
searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out
a pair of women's panties. St. Peter looked at the man with a
raised eyebrow and asked, 'And just what do those symbolize?'
The Irishman replied, 'These are Carol's'
Comment… “ I misread Carol’s as Carlos and couldn’t figure why
he’d be wearing panties.”
And of course comments went further downhill.
#Post#: 365399--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: Lurknomore
Date: December 20, 2025, 10:19 am
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17 year old male walks into a drug store. He says "I've been
invited to Christmas dinner at my new girlfriend's house.
Afterwards I hope there is a chance I get lucky, you know what I
mean"
Clerk: "How about condoms then? They could come in handy. Here's
a pack." After paying, he walks to the door, stops, smiles,
comes back: "you know what, the mom is also smoking hot, I think
I'll take another pack, just in case I get extra lucky."
Christmas eve comes around, the boy sits at the dinner table and
doesn't say a word. After a while his girlfriend says: "if I had
known you were so quiet, I wouldn't have invited you." the young
man replies "if you had told me your dad works at a drug store,
I wouldn't have come."
#Post#: 383118--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: Cairn terrier
Date: April 5, 2026, 12:14 pm
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To celebrate Easter, I'm going to betray one of you
(Is there a separate category for sacrilegious?)
#Post#: 383125--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: Lurknomore
Date: April 5, 2026, 3:25 pm
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--- Quote from: Cairn terrier link ---
>
> To celebrate Easter, I'm going to betray one of you
>
> (Is there a separate category for sacrilegious?)
>
--- End Quote ---
I thought you were posting under off color in defiance of Easter
egg 🪺 tradition.
#Post#: 389195--------------------------------------------------
Re: off-color jokes
DIR By: AbidingDudev4.1
Date: May 9, 2026, 5:05 pm
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A woman walks into the doctor asks what the trouble is
She says, "it's the weirdest thing, everytime I sneeze lately I
have an orgasm."
The doctor says "I see , what have you been taking for it?"
She replies "pepper"
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