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       #Post#: 76--------------------------------------------------
       Teenagers
       By: Queenie Date: August 12, 2021, 3:10 pm
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       Need I say more?
       Honestly mine are mostly past this and into young adulthood but
       man, I found parenting teenagers to be by far the hardest thing
       I've ever done.
       Youngest, barely still a teen, is approaching escape velocity I
       think.  I made that up.
       #Post#: 81--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: kkt Date: August 12, 2021, 3:18 pm
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       [quote author=Queenie link=topic=10.msg76#msg76 date=1628799058]
       Need I say more?
       Honestly mine are mostly past this and into young adulthood but
       man, I found parenting teenagers to be by far the hardest thing
       I've ever done.
       Youngest, barely still a teen, is approaching escape velocity I
       think.  I made that up.
       [/quote]
       I feel incredibly lucky, and a little bit of dread that fate my
       have some pretty horrible child in their 20s stored up for me.
       But so far it's been great.  Oh, sometimes some trouble keep
       track of deadlines and following through on things.  But
       compared to some classmates drama, suicide attempts, etc., I
       feel very lucky.
       #Post#: 83--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: Queenie Date: August 12, 2021, 3:24 pm
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       Maybe you are good at teenagers.  I'm good at teenagers who
       aren't my actual children.  I'm a pretty good auntie, for
       example, and I got along great with the teens in the various
       school groups (football, chorus, drama, Jesus people etc).  But
       my own teens?  Conflict conflict conflict conflict.
       I have come to accept that I was at least fifty percent of the
       problem, not that I know now what I could have done to fix it.
       #Post#: 251--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: KathySky Date: August 13, 2021, 4:21 pm
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       " Conflict conflict conflict conflict."
       When I was a teenager (60 to early 70s) it was the full
       Generation War, plus parents who sometimes seemed to have
       unreasonable expectations. So when my children (now in their 40s
       - gasp!), became teenagers, I decided to reduce conflict to the
       absolute minimum possible that would keep them alive, and on a
       reasonable trajectory to a productive and happy life.
       Untidy room? - Okay.
       Homework not done? - let them get the repercussions at school.
       Staying over with friends? - no problem.
       Alcohol in the den? - just don't let me see it; and friends have
       to stay over unless I'm sure there is a designated driver.
       That's not to say that I didn't intervene when there became a
       clear need for it.
       I certainly don't see myself as a model parent in many respects.
       I actually found my daughter's earlier years much harder.  So
       much depends on the personality of the child and the parent.
       #Post#: 309--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: Skowronek Date: August 13, 2021, 8:30 pm
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       I found an old post of mine from 2011 that may make someone
       smile.
       "I have Things 1 & 2, occasionally they are a Despair of
       Teenagers"
       #Post#: 6785--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: Queenie Date: August 25, 2021, 10:14 am
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       OK so Oldest isn't a teen anymore, but this seemed almost to
       age-appropriately fit:
       OLDEST, AT 11PM: What time does Dad leave for work?
       ME: 5:15AM, why?
       OLDEST: I need a ride to (town 90 minutes away and no, not on
       his dad's way to work) by 8AM tomorrow morning.
       It's a good thing he's so cute, is what.
       #Post#: 6792--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: Galium Date: August 25, 2021, 10:34 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       My kid is currently almost 15.  I alternate between fierce love
       and rage.  How can someone so adeptly push every one of my
       buttons?  I can't wait until we are out of the "I know
       everything, no one has ever suffered as I have" phase.
       #Post#: 6794--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: Queenie Date: August 25, 2021, 10:35 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Galium link=topic=10.msg6792#msg6792
       date=1629905673]
       My kid is currently almost 15.  I alternate between fierce love
       and rage.  How can someone so adeptly push every one of my
       buttons?  I can't wait until we are out of the "I know
       everything, no one has ever suffered as I have" phase.
       [/quote]
       I discovered that I suck at parenting teens.  If I had it to do
       over again I'd, I don't know, at least say yes more.
       #Post#: 6802--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: Galium Date: August 25, 2021, 10:39 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Queenie link=topic=10.msg6794#msg6794
       date=1629905743]
       [quote author=Galium link=topic=10.msg6792#msg6792
       date=1629905673]
       My kid is currently almost 15.  I alternate between fierce love
       and rage.  How can someone so adeptly push every one of my
       buttons?  I can't wait until we are out of the "I know
       everything, no one has ever suffered as I have" phase.
       [/quote]
       I discovered that I suck at parenting teens.  If I had it to do
       over again I'd, I don't know, at least say yes more.
       [/quote]
       I "think" I'm doing ok.  We do a lot of listening, and not much
       talking, which seems to work.  I know other kids feel safe at
       our house, so I feel proud of that.  I've only got the one kid,
       so I'm just glad that we're out of the tweens (which were
       honestly, the WORST).
       #Post#: 7123--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Teenagers
       By: kkt Date: August 25, 2021, 4:27 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Galium link=topic=10.msg6792#msg6792
       date=1629905673]
       My kid is currently almost 15.  I alternate between fierce love
       and rage.  How can someone so adeptly push every one of my
       buttons?  I can't wait until we are out of the "I know
       everything, no one has ever suffered as I have" phase.
       [/quote]
       Because they've been learning how to push those buttons since
       they were infants.
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