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#Post#: 684--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: RE
Date: August 3, 2021, 6:32 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: BuddyJ link ---
>
> [quote author=RE link=topic=26.msg679#msg679 date=1627998090]
> Ideas on what to do with myself for the rest of my miserable
life are welcome.
>
> RE
>
--- End Quote ---
Don't you have some family down near the proposed gravesite in
Missouri? Seems like being with family would at least involve
activity, comings and goings, news of the day, occasional help
with stuff?
[/quote]
My family such as it is consists of my sister who can't stand me
and I can't stand her, a nephew and grand nephew. I could not
be of much help to them, just a burden. Besides, it was hard
enough just to move across town here to my own Death Digs, and I
finally am mostly set up with all the Medicaid Bennies from the
State of Alaska. If I moved,I would have to go through that all
over again. Bottom Line: I am not going to leave the Last Great
Frontier...I will die here, the sooner the better. Preferably
as painlessly as possible. I really wish there was one of those
Euthanas8ia Parlors like Edward G. Robinson got to go to in
"Soylent Green". 24 hours in a beautiful Virtual Reality of all
the best I wish to remember along with struff I never got a
chance to do. Then quietly drift off to the Great Beyond.
Sadly no, I get to continue living a life I am utterly bored
with and hate, and I will likely die in even worse pain than I
already lived through. And for WHAT exactly?
RE
RE
#Post#: 686--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: RE
Date: August 4, 2021, 5:55 am
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: BuddyJ link ---
>
> [quote author=RE link=topic=26.msg684#msg684 date=1628033571]
> Sadly no, I get to continue living a life I am utterly bored
with and hate, and I will likely die in even worse pain than I
already lived through. And for WHAT exactly?
> RE
>
--- End Quote ---
More time.
[/quote]
???
RE
#Post#: 688--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: Digwe Must
Date: August 4, 2021, 1:16 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Hey RE Sorry I did not follow through sooner.
We had several rounds of lightening storms last night and lost
power until 10am. Several strikes within a mile and hundreds
(perhaps a thousand) in the general NE Washington area. Not
enough rain to impede any fires that get going - and they will
get going. We've been looking for smokes all morning. We're
already at extreme fire danger with level 4 restrictions and
several fires from the last round of lightening burning tens of
thousands of acres, and with air that is so full of smoke you
can slice it. Welcome to the future.
Regarding my suggestion.
We are lucky to have a young friend who helps us out two weeks a
month, interning here. He is in his thirties and about 10 years
ago went to Afghanistan for two combat tours with the Marine
Corps. He was in the sh*t. He and several of his buddies had
fairly severe PTSD with most of the common symptoms- including
depression, rage and anxiety. Eventually, someone suggested
micro-dosing psilocybin mushrooms. The effects for L and his
friends were remarkably positive. Tremendous results on
limiting all of the symptoms. I've read that people also have
a high rate of success stopping various addictions with
m-dosing.
I am speaking of a tiny dose daily. Not nearly enough to get
high. A recreational dose is considered generally to be 1 - 1.5
grams. For the micro-dosing one only takes .1 - .3 grams. A
transformative dose is 2.5 grams+. I'm told one can start to
feel the positive effects of micro-dosing within a few days.
The transformative dose should only be taken with a trained
"guide" - and is also very useful helping folks with terminal
illnesses and more severe psychological problems.
I'm afraid I need to get back out to the woods so I do not have
the time at this moment to look up the links that might get you
some more information. I do know this isn't isn't hippie
bullshit. Academic studies, that I'm sure you can find online
back all this up. There are several good you tube videos by
clinicians and academics on the subject.
Regarding the cost - Last year the local price for an oz of
mushrooms was about $100. Micro-dosing an ounce would last for
several months.
You're a smart guy and I think if the attitude improves you will
find much of value to do. You have helped many people and it's
no time to quit now. Things are just getting interesting.
Gotta go. A chopper with a bucket just flew overhead headed to
the reservoir. When the air is this thick it is very hard to
pick out new smokes.
Work at this. Don't give up.
#Post#: 689--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: RE
Date: August 4, 2021, 6:50 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
I'm not "giving up" but this prescription has a few problems.
#1- I have no idea where or from whom I could acquire the
shrooms
#2- Like being drunk, being high on hallucinogens might alter
my perceptions and might make me "happier", but it wouldn't
change a thing about the crappy existence I am living in a
senior housing development with nothing much to do.
#3 I don't really feel I have anything left to "give" that
hasn't been said already by me or someone else.
#4 Astoundingly few people are the least bit interested in
collapse, and even fewer than that give a shit about what an
impoverished cripple has to say about it.
Keep trying though, don't give up.
RE
#Post#: 690--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: Eddie
Date: August 5, 2021, 3:18 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: Digwe Must link ---
>
> RE: I haven't been in the neighborhood for a while (didn't
feel particularly welcome) -
>
--- End Quote ---
I also did not mean to say anything intended as a personal
attack. Sorry if I might have come across that way. I will argue
all day, but nothing I say is meant to bash anybody personally.
Sometimes maybe I go over the top....but it isn’t intentional.
#Post#: 691--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: RE
Date: August 5, 2021, 4:12 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Well, my Care Coordinator did at last come through with a
recliner and got it here himself with a friend in a pickup. So
last night I slept in it, which was better except at one point I
knocked the control off to the floor and couldn't reach it while
in the reclined position. Iwas pretty stuck and only after much
struggle and sweating was I able to grasp the connecting wire
and retrieve it. This is the big problem when you depend on
powered devices. Same with my scooter. I am afraid to venture
far on it for fear it will quit on me somewhere far from home.
When I am with a helper OK, but then I can use a manual
wheelchair and they can push. So the scooter doesn't really
make me much more independent. With the recliner, I have put
the control in a better position so hopefully I won't knock it
off again. But if we have a power outage while I am in it, this
could be a huge problem.
I also have now cancelled the work on thew prosthetic leg with
the provider I had so much trouble with. I see a new provider
next week, but there will probably be issues with Medicare &
Medicaid in making the change, so who knows when or if I will
ever get a fake leg. I doubt it will improve my life all that
much anyhow.
The real daily problem I have is all the little things I find I
cannot do like open a bottle or move some stuff around during
the majority of time I do not have a helper around. Plus all
the tasks I can do like going to the toilet (forrtunately,
because if I can't do that it's back to Assisted Living) but
which take great effort and time to do. Just daily living is a
pain in the ass.
Beyond all this is the fact this is all I have to look forward
to for the rest of my pitiful life. Very depressing.
RE
#Post#: 692--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: Digwe Must
Date: August 5, 2021, 9:08 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
RE: Again have to apologize for not answering sooner. There is
an ominous feel to all this smoke and a red sun. After all the
lightening we had Tuesday night I'm pleasantly surprised there
aren't more fires. We have to give it a few days. Lightening
can live underground in tree roots for quite a while. I'm
actually teaching myself to use a new little tractor. My ox,
Hercules, went down a few months ago and I had to shoot him. He
was a fine animal and I miss him. Anyway, I could train a new
ox if my legs held out- preferably another Brown Swiss - but
we'd be another 2 years before I could really count on hauling
large loads and doing much intricate work. I'm already older
than dirt. Meanwhile the firewood stack grows, the garden is
producing and I have too many sheep.
Sorry about the recliner control problem. At least you'll be
able to sleep better from here on out.
#1 This is not an insurmountable problem. The shrooms are very
popular. People are also aware of the micro-dosing approach. I
am certainly not cutting edge when I suggest this for you. Many
folks know much more about it than I do. I have just seen it
help some people who were bad off and improved markedly. Do
some asking around if you are interested. If you find no leads
there are other avenues.
#2 It's really not about being high. Really. The goal is
emotional resilience. If you feel buzzed or wiggly or get the
tingles you have taken a little too much. You should not be
aware at all of any psychedelic reaction. (unless that is your
goal) You start with tiny doses to make sure you can digest it.
This will not interfere with your drinkin'. You may decide to
drink a little less - or maybe not. I take a dram now and
again and used to be in the saloon business back when dinosaurs
roamed the earth. You're old enough to drink if you want to.
M-dosing doesn't fuzz you out of reality or zombify you into a
Stepford geezer. It is not a magic fix for your situation and
it is not an irrelevant bandaid. If you want to spend less of
your time and energy feeling miserable then I suggest it. If
you want to find some things to focus on that bring you
satisfaction and meaning, you must avoid falling into the black
pit. The good stuff doesn't live down there. Micro-dosing should
help with this. In no way would I expect m-dosing to alter your
cuddly teddy bear personality.
Paul Stamets ( I believe he is the world's foremost mycologist)
has some good work on micro-dosing. Lex Friedman has some
really good interviews with academics and clinicians who study
and use psychedelics in treating people.
#3 and #4 I get this feeling of frustration. I share much of
it especially the degree to which people are pegging the
oblivious meter. But, you are the guy who wants to save
everyone he can. There is much biblical stuff about people not
heeding the prophets. Being a prophet of impending doom has
never been a path to easy living.
My own opinion is that if this is what you are supposed to do,
if this is your path, then this is no time to quit. If you are
a person who just must play music- you play. The size of the
audience doesn't matter you just play. There is no disgrace in
playing the old favorites with a new twist or riff.
HTML https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNp1kqnRw-U&list=TLPQMDUwODIwMjGU4BGv3WQs7g&index=4
There are plenty of dilettante doomers out there. Many of them
do doom and collapse for profit. Folks that are trying to scare
you just enough to sell you something. You, however, are the
Doyen Of Doom, evolved beyond the profit motive. Go with it. (
I almost said run with it. That would have been in poor taste.)
Having said that, it may be that you decide to move on to
something else. But moving on to perpetual misery should not be
an option. I think the quickest and best way (for now) to
transcend the feculence of your situation is to find that
project or pastime that you can generate some passion for.
Give this guy a few minutes of your time. He's also missing a
leg.
HTML https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJIY-wO5e-c
Not knowing anything about streaming I can't comment with any
degree of helpfulness on K-Dog's suggestion. But I do have this
image of RE as Reginald Eversham in a red velvet smoking jacket
with the background of a well-to-do Englishman's library
complete with roaring fire. A brandy snifter, perhaps a cigar
and doom. Lots of doom.
I must go feed the critters and tighten things up for the night.
I could go on for pages about the stress of this drought and
heat on the critters and trees. I won't put you through that.
By the way, RE, do you ever go fishing? I know you are more of
a tech guy, but I was wondering if there is a wheelchair
accessible fishing dock for the public anywhere close by. You
could catch dinner. Just a thought.
#Post#: 693--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: Digwe Must
Date: August 5, 2021, 9:13 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Eddie
Thanks very much for that note. Appreciate it. Not to worry.
We're good.
#Post#: 694--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: K-Dog
Date: August 5, 2021, 10:01 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[center][img]
HTML https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Feveripedia-storage.s3.amazonaws.com%2FNewlinkFiles%2F3944133%2F976fd___terence-mckenna%2Fterence-with-a-mushroom.gif&f=1&nofb=1[/img][/center]
#Post#: 696--------------------------------------------------
Re: 🏥 RE is Dying 2
DIR By: RE
Date: August 6, 2021, 4:44 am
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: Digwe Must link ---
>
>
>
> RE: Again have to apologize for not answering sooner. There
is an ominous feel to all this smoke and a red sun. After all
the lightening we had Tuesday night I'm pleasantly surprised
there aren't more fires. We have to give it a few days.
Lightening can live underground in tree roots for quite a while.
I'm actually teaching myself to use a new little tractor. My
ox, Hercules, went down a few months ago and I had to shoot him.
He was a fine animal and I miss him. Anyway, I could train a
new ox if my legs held out- preferably another Brown Swiss - but
we'd be another 2 years before I could really count on hauling
large loads and doing much intricate work. I'm already older
than dirt. Meanwhile the firewood stack grows, the garden is
producing and I have too many sheep.
>
> Sorry about the recliner control problem. At least you'll be
able to sleep better from here on out.
>
> #1 This is not an insurmountable problem. The shrooms are
very popular. People are also aware of the micro-dosing
approach. I am certainly not cutting edge when I suggest this
for you. Many folks know much more about it than I do. I have
just seen it help some people who were bad off and improved
markedly. Do some asking around if you are interested. If you
find no leads there are other avenues.
>
> #2 It's really not about being high. Really. The goal is
emotional resilience. If you feel buzzed or wiggly or get the
tingles you have taken a little too much. You should not be
aware at all of any psychedelic reaction. (unless that is your
goal) You start with tiny doses to make sure you can digest it.
This will not interfere with your drinkin'. You may decide to
drink a little less - or maybe not. I take a dram now and
again and used to be in the saloon business back when dinosaurs
roamed the earth. You're old enough to drink if you want to.
>
> M-dosing doesn't fuzz you out of reality or zombify you into a
Stepford geezer. It is not a magic fix for your situation and
it is not an irrelevant bandaid. If you want to spend less of
your time and energy feeling miserable then I suggest it. If
you want to find some things to focus on that bring you
satisfaction and meaning, you must avoid falling into the black
pit. The good stuff doesn't live down there. Micro-dosing should
help with this. In no way would I expect m-dosing to alter your
cuddly teddy bear personality.
>
> Paul Stamets ( I believe he is the world's foremost
mycologist) has some good work on micro-dosing. Lex Friedman
has some really good interviews with academics and clinicians
who study and use psychedelics in treating people.
>
> #3 and #4 I get this feeling of frustration. I share much of
it especially the degree to which people are pegging the
oblivious meter. But, you are the guy who wants to save
everyone he can. There is much biblical stuff about people not
heeding the prophets. Being a prophet of impending doom has
never been a path to easy living.
>
> My own opinion is that if this is what you are supposed to do,
if this is your path, then this is no time to quit. If you are
a person who just must play music- you play. The size of the
audience doesn't matter you just play. There is no disgrace in
playing the old favorites with a new twist or riff.
>
>
> There are plenty of dilettante doomers out there. Many of
them do doom and collapse for profit. Folks that are trying to
scare you just enough to sell you something. You, however, are
the Doyen Of Doom, evolved beyond the profit motive. Go with
it. ( I almost said run with it. That would have been in poor
taste.)
>
> Having said that, it may be that you decide to move on to
something else. But moving on to perpetual misery should not be
an option. I think the quickest and best way (for now) to
transcend the feculence of your situation is to find that
project or pastime that you can generate some passion for.
>
> Give this guy a few minutes of your time. He's also missing a
leg.
>
> Not knowing anything about streaming I can't comment with any
degree of helpfulness on K-Dog's suggestion. But I do have this
image of RE as Reginald Eversham in a red velvet smoking jacket
with the background of a well-to-do Englishman's library
complete with roaring fire. A brandy snifter, perhaps a cigar
and doom. Lots of doom.
>
> I must go feed the critters and tighten things up for the
night. I could go on for pages about the stress of this drought
and heat on the critters and trees. I won't put you through
that.
>
> By the way, RE, do you ever go fishing? I know you are more
of a tech guy, but I was wondering if there is a wheelchair
accessible fishing dock for the public anywhere close by. You
could catch dinner. Just a thought.
>
--- End Quote ---
Doom was my path when I still had something that could pass for
a life. Now I am the Rolling Dead. A Zombie in a Wheelchair.
My motto while still alive was "Save as Many as You Can; now I
can't even save myself. I can't lead by example and live out in
the bush, I need just about all the perks of industrial
civilization just to stay alive physically, and even then I need
daily help. I don't see the point in stuffing my digs with
preps again, its just a pain to move it all when I need to go to
hospital and give up this place too. Unless I am fortunate and
physically fully die first, I will end up in assisted living
again. Just one hopefully with better food than the last one
and not so many dementia residents/
I am not sure how you think I could find a Shroom Provider. I
never leave the digs except with my PCA and that is just to go
shopping at a food store or maybe Walmart. Maybe you could mail
some to me.
I can't fish anymore, I can't hold a rod or use the reel. Also
no way to get to a fishing location except with a lot of help.
Just ask Eddie what a pain it was for him to ship around a
cripple in the RV when I still had both legs. It would be an
order of magnitude worse now.
I spent a decade of my life writing about doom, and guess what
it's still coming. Live Streaming about it, it will still come.
I do not have the energy or inclination to repeat myself on the
topic.
Sorry for being so miserable.
RE
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